shitpostergoater

this is not the soup store

[sometimesanequine]

[phillip-bankss]

grug dont have to change!

[krismasdreemurr00]

[witheringsapphic-deactivated202]

please reblog this until i find my true love. i am so alone

[tables-but-with-a-very-long-name]

Made it poly friendly

[witheringsapphic-deactivated202]

oh hell yeah even better

[courtjester69420]

Made one for aromantic trans people 👍

[queen-mihai]

Reblogging for poly people, mono people, and people who need their keys

[sassyphantomkoala]

Thank you for reminding me of my privilege, by helping me remember that as an allo person I never lost my keys.

[fizpup]

Get real.

[pastelpolitoed]

tumblr glitched while loading this, so instead of "dude get real" being the punchline, it was like this cat put on glasses for the first time and their friend was just. a legit dog. and not like them at all.

[fizpup]

This is killing me

[wanderingokali]

Don't think I've ever posted the stuff from the aquarium game on its own... here's the sprites i had exported as gifs, although im missing a couple from whats in the full game. If I remember, i'll post their lore pages later as well!

[kosmogrl]

[youkai93]

The clover has finally grown enough for her to munch on again

[teaboot]

I think that if you had enough daughters AND played your cards right you could spring Mambo Number Five out at the EXACT right gathering and shatter your entire family's trust forever

[teaboot]

The secret is to name them out of order with the lyrics so by the time anyone catches on it's too late

[teaboot]

For me personally the ideal gathering would be my funeral

[metanarrates]

all women should be more hairy and sweaty and eat more food and laugh more loudly. my stance as a feminist and also my stance as a lesbian pervert

[mosslingg]

fake marriage trope but theyre so fucking stupid

[nufflesdoodles]

OMMMG I LOVE THEEEEMM

The stupid smile on my face BRO

[grunkypeep]

i hate when men complain about women’s body hair, even like the fine hair on their backs. go fuck a shark if you wanna have sex with something hairless

[cannedviennasnausage]

#shark skin is actually covered in tiny barbs #aka teeth #they are literally a swimming tooth

I suddenly have the urge to grate cheese on a great white

[flanoirbunny]

wouldn’t that make the shark a

grate white

[shutupandtalkgeekytome]

This post got weird

[jennytrout]

This post started with fucking hairless sharks. Weird wasn’t a destination so much as a jumping off point.

[captainclickycat]

I’ve never been so surprised not to encounter the word “smooth” in a text post

[parakeet]

Can whoever dumped this scary evil metal dog off on my beach come get it it’s scaring my Michaels thank you

[notbecauseofvictories]

I am being so professional about my desire to throttle this person.

[pankendev]

they got pussy on this app?

[furryparadises]

Gold in the comments

[footlongdingledong]

I'm turning 18 in twenty years it's so over for me

[crimsonclad]

I saw a bumper sticker and thought “is that seductive Daffy Duck” and then when I looked closer I realized it was actually a fishing bumper sticker but also. also it is still very much seductive Daffy Duck???? somehow????????

[notbecauseofvictories]

Also, I know it's not technically the trad wives' fault, but I do resent the fact that now, whenever I fantasize about running a quirky bookshop where I spend most of the day reading behind the counter, or becoming a diner owner who cooks down balsamic vinegar and cures salmon for rapturously grateful townies, there's a nasty voice that whispers---be honest. your fantasy would require outsourcing tasks (labor) to someone who cannot refuse the attendant effort of monitoring book stock, or sourcing beef, or all the little ignominious things necessary to create such a lovely dream. White women have been doing that for ages, plus you're feeding into the Hallmark/Ballerina Farms/trad wife lie. You know better.

I do not like that voice.

[notbecauseofvictories]

@ everyone in the notes suggesting that actually, they would be happy monitoring book stock, or sourcing beef---please know that I respect that, and honor your interest in things that I cannot bring myself to care too much about. However, "be a good boss who sorts out the schedule, determines pay fairly and honestly (while still turning a profit) adjudicates HR issues, monitors performance, and provides solid health insurance" is also not part of the fantasy.