shitty malevolent headcanons @shittymalevolentheadcanons - Tumblr Blog

Hello all!! call me ebb! this is a blog for all malevolent headcanons of the silly, goofy, tragic, morbid, and all around entertaining sort. partly (mostly) inspired by similar blogs (thanks @shitty-mechs-headcannons and @questionable-chnt-hc)

this blog IS a work in progress as its an ungodly hour of night as I make it so expect updates and changes

my main is @unsat-and-strange if you want umm true chaos I guess

but for now? send me your thoughts >:)

#intro post #mod ebb rambles

sizzypheanloop

I'm like 1000% sure John "aggresive care" Doe fed up with Arthur all erratic and refusing to go to sleep (too focused on the case) basically flings Arthur over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and carries him to bed to then throw himself over him weighted blanket style so Arthur rests.

#get reblogged op this is canon now #malevolent #john doe #arthur lester #reblog

Noel has absolutely used his cane to trip up a criminal before.

based, actually. canon, at least to me. i should draw this

#asks and answers #malevolent #noel malevolent #shitty malevolent headcanons

noel uses a cane because i said so

#its too late to change my mind its already permanently engraved in my mind #noel malevolent #malevolent #shitty malevolent headcanons #mod ebb rambles

i think that after the sandstorm john always had trouble seeing out of arthurs right eye

#whats that one post about “he would not fucking be able bodied after that”#and really this could be the case it has just never been adressed as far as i can remember #malevolent #shitty malevolent headcanons #john doe #arthur lester #mod ebb rambles

ebb-is-learning

i stayed up later than i should have making this, my alarm is set for 4:30 am. anyway john doe bottlecap pin <3

unending thanks to @rocksanddeadflowers for the rundown on bottlecap pins a while back :D

shittymalevolentheadcanons

i never put this on the sideblog!!! what was i thinking?? here treat for yall :)

#john doe #malevolent #mod ebb rambles #the mainblog speaks #shameless self promo oopsies

ebb-is-learning

the fact that my first actual attempt drawing the king in yellow is such an utter shitpost. its what ge deserves, probably. anyway this is how the whole fracturing thing went, right?

#thought it was funny so its going on the sideblog too :)#this kinda counts as a headcanon right?#the mainblog speaks #malevolent #the king in yellow #sarah cummings #mod ebb draws stuff #mod ebb rambles

new header dropped

that first description of the dreamlands still haunts me just a bit. anyway yeah i drew this a while back and just never posted it so enjoy

#mod ebb draws stuff #malevolent #the dreamlands #be the change you want to see i said in reference to not seeing enough dreamlands fanart and here i am

so. i feel relatively confident in assuming arthur still has custody of his eyelids even with john having his eyes. additionally, we've seen plenty of evidence that arthur can't feel the parts of his body that john owns at all. with these assumptions in mind:

do you think arthur ever forgets to blink?

#the question has been plagueing me cause arthur cant feel his eyes getting dry. does john have to remind arthur to blink?#also i think theres some under used comedic potential in arthur still having his eyelids.#argument with the voice in your head? close your eyes!! thatll catch him off guard!!#malevolent #arthur lester #john doe #mod ebb rambles #shitty malevolent headcanons

Kayne’s traveled through time and seen the future/modern-day past the 1930s and loves using all the knowledge and references he has to confuse Arthur at any given moment

he uses the phrase "skibidi toiler" and arthur immediatly disintegrates (dont worry, he gets better)

#asks and answers #arthur lester #kayne malevolent #malevolent #shitty malevolent headcanons

Kayne's favourite instrument is a kazoo or five of them

walking headache of a man eldritch entity, I hate him so much /affectionate

#I'm starting to think I just really like this pose (thinking back to when I drew raphaella la cognizi like this)#anyway car doodles yay #if you think the hands aren't the same size yes they are #doodles I like less the longer I look at them too unfortunately but fuck it we ball #described #described in alt text #mod ebb draws stuff #asks and answers #malevolent #shitty malevolent headcanons #kayne malevolent #mod ebb rambles

i know in my heart that kayne likes to comedically drop large pianos on people

someone remind me to draw this

#instantly added to my own canon btw thanks anon #god he so would #I don't even know what to add you've summed it up perfectly #asks and answers #kayne malevolent #malevolent #shitty malevolent headcanons #to draw later

this might be a no-brainer but we can all agree John would be left handed, right?

#mod ebb rambles #malevolent #john doe #shitty malevolent headcanons

John rambles to Arthur while Arthur’s asleep; just uses him as an empty sounding board. Also he said “I love you” a couple times before when Arthur was sleeping.

oooooo I love this !!!! he absolutely would though

(also letting an 'i love you' slip when arthurs sleeping, oh my heart.....)

#asks and answers #john doe #arthur lester #malevolent #shitty malevolent headcanons

shittymalevolentheadcanons

headcanon that during arthurs time in his coma john gets a pretty solid grasp on basic medicine, like what normal vitals look like etc

alive-currently

Headcanon he'd get so lonely sometimes and pretend to have a conversation with Lily. Like she'd talk to a doctor or ask questions or just say things out loud and John would answer

shittymalevolentheadcanons

oh hi um break my heart why don't you

#YES THOUGH #keep breaking my heart i love this so much #may I add this into a fic I'm working on?

headcanon that during arthurs time in his coma john gets a pretty solid grasp on basic medicine, like what normal vitals look like etc

#mod ebb rambles #john doe #arthur lester #shitty malevolent headcanons #malevolent

Arthur likes cinnamon and John likes black licorice. Pleasepleaseplease

mmmm yummy snack time for the boys

#im not super fond of licorice but for john i will allow it #asks and answers #john doe #arthur lester #malevolent #shitty malevolent headcanons

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