i'm shrimp & i use the internet

he/ve/it/dude/bro/that thing ~ i’m a dumbass. i’m hated by god. i was diagnosed with annoying bitch disease at birth. i self identify as a deplorable bastard. a fag, queer, whatever. i’m gnawing on your walls from the inside out. i’ve been wanted by the government since 2007. i’m the biggest clown in the room at any given function. there is no method to my madness. you’ll be sorry to have ever had the misfortune of stumbling upon this accursed blog.

[shrimpothy]

sometimes i refer to myself in the 3rd person

and by sometimes i mean kind of a lot

PLEASE STOP ASKING ME FOR DONATIONS I AM A BROKE COLLEGE STUDENT WITH HEALTH ISSUES 😭😭😭

i would if i could but i can’t so instead i just feel like shit about something entirely out of my control, especially bc of my moral scrupulosity issues ;-; so pls just respect that :[[

🦐 more under the cut 🦐

19 ~ don’t care who interacts as long as they don’t make me uncomfortable n shit :] and even then i’m willing to just like…talk about it lmao. so yeah

‘shrimp’ is op’s online persona, and not my real name.

shrimp uses all pronouns in his bio, but mainly refers to himself using he/him, to make it easier on his audience to understand who he is referring to (himself)

(i’m gonna hope that made sense..)

explaining tags:

this is a certified shrimpothy post — original shrimp thoughts/not a rb, etc. (note: some original posts won’t be tagged with this, usually just bc i don’t deem the post important or interesting enough)

there are many benefits to being a shrimp — my dumb take on the ‘benefits to being a marine biologist’ meme. funny or positive things relating to either myself or real shrimp lol

there appear to be some disadvantages to being a shrimp — a gag of the above. basically just the opposite of that tag.

shrimp says some dumb shit — pretty self explanatory methinks

shitpost? more like shrimppost — mostly shrimp originals that are shitposty or shitpost adjacent

shrimp says it’s time to get unconscious — a reference to @/i-am-a-fish ’s post of the same verbiage wherein fish (or in this case, shrimp) is tired, about to go to sleep, etc etc etc and anything else that may elude or be relevant to sleep/sleeping/sleepiness

(these pronouns are getting out of hand /j ref (if you use those pronouns or something similar just know that shrimp loves you /gen p))

note - it may be relevant to add that shrimp is a chronically fatigued insomniac so there may be mentions of disability or disorder induced exhaustion and whatnot under this tag as well. shrimp also sometimes sleeps as a coping mechanism, has an ever fluctuating sleep schedule, and may tend to keep odd waking hours. basically shrimp is, to his very core, eepypilled.

shrimp is too lazy to add the rest of the tags at the moment…but he will at some point

find shrimp elsewhere even though he never posts there…yet

shrimpstagram

shrimptube

[greelin]

i am a dog locked in a car in the summer. the a/c is not on. i do not have water. no music is playing

[balconeko]

if you ONLY associate "men" or "masculinity" with negative stuff, then youre not gonna be a good ally to trans masc people. while some transmascs can experience gender euphoria from being associated with the negative parts of masculinity, its not really the best way to give them that. "wow, youre really a man cause <negative male stereotype>" might be funny and stuff, but imagine telling a transfem "wow, youre really a woman cause <negative female stereotype>". while it could give someone gender euphoria but its still a product of bigotry.

if you want to be a better ally to trans men and transmascs, you should probably try to appreciate good qualities of men and masculine people in general.

[rbremington]

Just to raise awareness at the situation in Canada right now to my non-Canadian followers: Toronto has been ranked as having the worst air quality in the world right now due to wildfires.

Toronto is not a wildfire-prone area. It is extremely close to the USA border, and the smog is currently affecting NY right now. There is literal chunks of debris in the air. The sky is orange, and the sun is nowhere to be seen.

Climate change and its effects are right outside your door. Data centres are the cause for the insane heat waves across the globe, and the increase in wildfires and other natural disasters.

You will watch recordings of the world burn around you, and only when you are behind the camera will you realize there is no going back.

Stop the data centres. Protect our planet.

[gaydiation-poisoning]

"You look so good I'd cross the street if I saw you!"

That transgender man is at higher risk of being raped than you are. Shut your ass up.

[burning-gray-mon]

The transmascvoicesproject blog that I've seen floating around and people complaining about is... interesting. It's essentially just a genderflipped version of the transfemvoicesproject blog - the people arguing in the replies about how actually TME is just Not Transfem when the majority of posts on the tfvp blog are about transmascs raping transfems is certainly a choice, particularly since we all know trans rape statistics (as the perpetrator) in general are Very Low.

I don't like it, though. It's not the right time nor place to be saying these things. I cannot see the point in such a blog - either of them - in this current climate. The tfvp blog was obviously nasty and malintentioned, and the same thing is true of the tmvp blog.

[plume-clinic]

Today is Non-Binary People’s Day!

Today is International Non-Binary People’s Day!

Officially celebrated since 2012, Non-Binary People’s Day is a celebration of everyone living outside the binary.

While not all non-binary people pursue gender-affirming hormone therapy, it can be an essential element of care for those who do!

Contrary to what you may have read or seen online, being non-binary doesn’t have “a look” or any other “requirements”. 💛🤍💜🖤 Whether you’re somewhere inside the binary, outside the binary, or entirely beyond it, today is for you!

[sailatina3]

Orgasm denial. Orgasm anger. Orgasm bargaining. Orgasm depression. Orgasm acceptance.

[inber]

sad they give tissue boxes plastic labia folds but no clitoris

[cipheramnesia]

I'm begging everyone to get their flu shots

[too-many-blorbos]

Soulmates as a horror concept.

You WILL love this person. It doesn't matter who you loved before; any feelings you had, any promises you made, they will become inconsequential as soon as you lock eyes with the stranger Fate has picked for you.

There's no way to stop it.

There's no way to say "no."

You will meet someone and with a single glance, both of you will become someone new, someone who's now bound to this stranger whether you like it or not, want it or not.

Trapped in a dance together until the day you die.

[oonpy]

[kristianasquill]

You know what? Forget the discourse. This is no longer my hill to die on.

You wanna ship canonically aspec characters because “aro/ace people can still date/have sex”? Okay, then. LET’S DO IT.  I wanna see an aromantic character with an alloromantic love interest. I wanna see that confession of undying love and the moment when the aro character says they will never feel the same way—not romantically.

I wanna see the asexual character with their allosexual partner. I wanna see that moment when the ace characters tries sex with their partner for the first time because they want to make them happy only to realize that they are 100% sex repulsed.

I wanna see the two demiromantics who don’t even know if what they feel is romantic attraction, but they adore each other and just want to make healthy snacks together and destroy each other at Mario Kart.

I wanna see the two aces who love sensual affection and are figuring out what they define as sexual or not.

I wanna see the romance + sex neutral aroace who happily and consensually does whatever makes their partner happy…but their partner still struggles with feeling undesired. 

Oh, babe. You thought shipping an aspec character would be just like shipping an allo character? 

[imjunebitch]

we SHOULD have more shipping content with arospec and acespec characters actually because almost none of the shit we have now is actually that, its writing them as allo and then saying "whaaaat nooooo they can be in relationships tooooo" why dont you try writing the aro character in a romantic partnership as actually being aromantic but partnering that is way more fucking interesting

[casperxp]

I want more aromantic characters who are not also asexual !!! I want more characters who 100 percent want to get it on but just don’t feel any romantic feelings for anyone. I want more aromantic characters with “friends with benefits” except it’s literally just that. That’s their best friend and sometimes they let them fuck. More aromantic characters please !!!!

[gokusclit]

How r u a grown woman and u still think bush is unhygienic tbh. Like are u dumb as rocks

[lowpawly]

people foolishly dismiss desserts and treats as having no nutritional value when they actually are necessary for refilling your sanity stat. to prove my point please observe the emotional stability of the next person you meet who doesnt let themselves ever eat any form of dessert

[underthesedarlingskies]

qft