Never Learned - Gator Days
...the alt text?

Origami Around
Fai_Ryy

@theartofmadeline

PR's Tumblrdome
Noah Kahan
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
h

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sheepfilms

ellievsbear

bliss lane

Discoholic 🪩
EXPECTATIONS
Mike Driver
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
untitled

roma★
RMH
Misplaced Lens Cap

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@shubaka17
Never Learned - Gator Days
...the alt text?
remember how utterly inescapable how i met your mother used to be with the memes and references and barney and bro code and wait for it... and then the finale was so hated it vanished overnight
The finale so successfully erased the show from public consciousness, that when people tried to come up with a name for the "extremely popular show with finale so bad that people just immediately stop talking about it" phenomenon, people called it... the Game of Thrones Effect. HIMYM got memoryholed so hard that people forgot it even existed
you are fifteen thousand generations removed from stone tools
to be clear you are fifteen thousand generations removed from the invention of stone tools. not from the end of stone tools. modern humans are still using stone tools.
Flawless tags, @baddywronglegs
I thought you meant we were descendents -of- stone tools
your father was a handaxe and your mother smelt of microliths
The other day i was getting rizzd the fuck upp by the crunchy latino cashier at trader joes. Just having a blast. Then the whole vibe changed when my card declined .
but i believe aang can save the world
i could not eat a dozen fried eggs and would never want to do so. but i almost certainly could accidentally eat a dozen deviled eggs if i was at a party or perhaps a picnic and they were there. they are a highly dangerous food item in this way
The devil's greatest trick was convincing the world he doesn't exist. His second greatest trick was that egg thing hoo boy those are good
a ton of people have unexpectedly followed me over the last 2 days so here is my rent-lowering gunshot:
the american south is the most racially diverse and poorest region of the united states, and any political sentiment that treats the south is stupid or expendable is inherently racist and classist. a lot of y'all are racist and classist. the south is also the heart of american culture. argue with a wall. you cannot deny that everybody in the entire world does not emulate artists from atlanta. there is vested interest in keeping the south poor and uneducated BECAUSE this is the most racially diverse region in this country. if you actually give a fuck about progress, you would fight for the south, not mock us.
“Would you block someone just for disagreeing with you?” Pal, I’ll block someone for agreeing with me in the wrong tone of voice.
"You hear that? They're saying The Odyssey doesn't even have nobody!"
"They've got nobody in the Odyssey?"
"No I'm saying they don't got nobody."
"Nobody's there?"
"Nobody's not there!"
"So everyone's there?"
"Everybody but nobody!"
i think this is probably true of every office, but there's a middle aged woman working in business who doesn't hold any particular place in the chain of command but is Sovereign. i was running support and she has access to more secure network drives than i do. im pretty sure she has an admin account. i was having trouble with my parking pass and my boss just said to talk to kristen- one day later i had parking in any garage on campus. she's not even in charge of parking in our building
This is also true of academia. In pretty much any department of the university — in my experience at least — there’s a person with a small-but-private office and an unassuming title (probably including a word like “secretary” or “assistant”), usually an older woman, and she actually runs the place. Faculty defer to her; department heads come and go, but Jill has been there for thirty years and knows how everything works, and she’s the person you go to if you want to get anything done. You’ll know her because when a professor directs you to her they won’t say “you need to talk to the Office of So-and-So because this falls under their purview”, but “you need to talk to Jill.” Her official job title is basically irrelevant because her actual role is acting as eminence grise for this whole operation.
I’ve personally had the experience where my advisor told me “you should do such-and-such certification, go talk to Jill,” and I went to talk to Jill & she said “actually you can’t do such-and-such because XYZ,” so I went back to my advisor to relay this, and he just kind of shrugged and was like, “well if Jill says no, then it can’t be done” and that was the end of it. Complete veto power, no higher authority to turn to, because the only reason Jill can’t do something is if it’s literally impossible.
Honestly there’s probably a whole dissertation about invisible labor and gender dynamics in there waiting to be written.
The one in my undergrad department was Linda C, and I think her hypercompetence must have risen to the point of allowing her to manipulate time itself, because in my experience, every time you needed to talk to Ms. C, you would end up chatting with her for at least an hour (which was both enjoyable and informative) and yet she got so much work done--it just didn't seem physically possible.
Take secretaries and administrative assistants out of any organization and you'll see it crumble in no time. They are the holder of the secrets to understanding red tape and other administrative nightmares.
The whole project of corporate IT was trying to get rid of this type of person and it's why nothing works anymore and we're all dying
im on vacation but i cannot stop thinking of mikey's boots. omfg.
imagine tbp era mikey way stepping on you okay bye
just saw an edit on tiktok focusing on mikeys slutty buckle boots and i need need need someone to write some boot worship about them or i'll die
im not always horny. but im always like 30 seconds of fantasizing away from being absurdely horny.
The three tiers of queer sff:
Broke: what is worldbuilding? Made in a lab to be as blandly inoffensive as possible. Time to randomly namedrope terms like 'nonbinary' and 'ace' while doing zero work actually incorporating them into the world or characters and have someone give a speech about how valid they are. Lines like 'I'm too ace for this' while never exploring the concept of asexuality or aromanticism and still having very central romance plotlines is common. I hate it here learn how to write realistic dialogue and fully realized characters I'm begging.
Woke: more ore less typical sci-fi and fantasy but It’s Queer Now. Might include in-universe queerphobia to be struggled against or may have queer identities be fully normalized. Can be done bad or well depending on the skill of the writer. A good way to explore our contemporary ideas of gender and sexuality or to have a bit of a power fantasy with lesbian princesses and trans knights. There will probably be a bisexual love triangle.
Bespoke: what is a gender. What is monogamy. What is polyamory. What is romance. What is platonic. Time to show you the most fucked up uncategorizable relationship you’ve ever seen. There may be weird ass metaphorical sex
fuck it
Book recs: tier three queer sff
AKA books that tackle gender, sexuality and relationships in ways that come off as deeply alien and non normative to our present day culture, frequently featuring actual aliens.
For details on the books, check under the readmore! My personal favorites are marked with an *
A note: as I'm generally more into sci-fi than fantasy, this list skews heavily toward the former. Feel free to make your own recommendations in the notes if you know of more titles!
If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!
[images: photo collages of the covers of all the named books, first all of the books in one image and then in groups of three before the descriptions.]
you should be addicted to shutting the fuck up
You wanna fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid
it's finally time to retire my favorite pair of pants. it's coming apart at every pocket, seam, and even the material on the crotch + ass.
i got one last saturday with friends in, but it's not going to go to any more movies. no more shopping malls. no more state parks or skate rinks. not going through tsa at the airport anymore. what a good pair of pants.