-crossposted from wattpad-
you're the girl who loves runes and psychology, sometimes to a fault. to everyone else, you're always in control, always able to get things done. but this wasn't always the case, as you know too well.
since young, you've struggled with motivation issues and impulsivity. always failing to do what was expected of you. you were called lazy, problem child, and more by those who met you.
the only thing you did right, was runes. runes and psychology. you knew everything there was to know about them. they could make anything happen with words alone, they could create something from nothing.
...could they create self-control, too?
and so, at the age of twelve, you made the bracelet. just runes and your name. a thin metal band, binding your will to itself. you fashioned a clasp on it and wore it, leaving your disorganized past behind.
from that day, you never missed an essay or any hours of sleep. the bracelet controlled your emotions and desires, erasing any unruly temptations. everyone praised you, said you changed. finally, you were liked and appreciated. finally, you fit in.
you only told your secret to a few. until one of the few decided they had enough.
it was late at night, and you were at his house. a study session you organised. he turned to you, a twisted smile on his face. and he asked for the bracelet.
you declined, of course. but he knew about your past, about your failures. he threatened to release them all, show the world how crazy you were. if, and only if, he didn't get the bracelet.
you were just eighteen. those twelve years were more than enough to destroy your chance at life, or so you thought. with trembling hands, you carefully unclasp the bracelet and handed it to him.
he took it with a smirk, putting it on. one day, he said. but you knew he wasn't planning on giving it back.
from that day on, he owned you. he kept up your good behaviour to evade suspicion, while he slowly offloaded more and more duties to you. class chores turned to homework turned to graded projects.
he erased all hesitation or discontent, shaped your desire to help him. your people-pleasing tendencies just made it easier. through burnout and fatigue, you carried his burdens for months, unable to speak up about it.
until one day, you saw him walking alone, not paying attention. this was your chance. you lunged forward, unclasping the bracelet and pulling it off his wrist.
you held it in your hand, shaking with adrenaline. his eyes were wide with shock. he swore, reaching out to get it back. but you were faster.
"give it back," he grit out. "you can't have that."
you grasped the bracelet ever tighter, not letting him close. frustrated, he raised his hands and uttered an incantation. the bracelet shattered to pieces, gone.
you stared at the fragments, unmoving. thoughts started to flood back into your mind. emotions. distractions. all released and overwhelming.
and suddenly, blankness. you looked up. he was grinning.
"guess this will have to do, till you make another one. Come on, follow me." he muttered.
you felt yourself move, pulled by the spell he cast over you. you didn't want to be under his control anymore. but the spell had erased your feelings, just like the bracelet. and did you really want to go back to distractions and disappointments?
you fought with yourself before you fought against him. you decided that it was worth it to be free.
you forced yourself still, fighting the impulses that told your legs to move. he stared at you, shouting at you to move. you ran, far away, so he couldn't catch you.
you thought about the bracelet. it promised self control, but instead you lost that control. it promised you a life free of pain, but it just caused you more. should you be controlled? or should you learn to be free?
freedom comes with a price, the chance of failure. to be free is to make choices, to risk those choices to be wrong. but with the risk of failure comes the chance of success, and isn't it worth it to chart your path yourself?
for freedom comes with the beauty of possibility. and you were determined to take it back. no more bracelet, no more control. you cast off the rigid chains you held yourself in forever, replacing it with the flexibility of choice.
(A/N: This isn’t super good but ig its a start?)
