Simple Stupid Everything

Mainly Sports, Sometimes Other Shit

[simplestupideverything]

I know so many people are going to be sad that Burky got traded... but hot take, I think he’ll kill it with the Avs 👏🏻

[alexandretexiers]

Watch the Avs appreciate Burky more than the Caps did this past season lmao

Can’t wait for a possible Burky-Jost-Rantanen line.

[simplestupideverything]

Vikings' Alex Høgh Andersen Turned Ivar's Pain Into Art and for That He Needs an Emmy Nomination | TV Guide

As Ivar the Boneless, Andersen gives a performance that is unforgettable

I wrote an article about how we should give Alex Høgh Andersen an Emmy and I’d love it if we could show it some love!

[simplestupideverything]

(Also I think brooks was just on a one year contract so what would they buy out? I could be wrong though)

Okay, so this is where UFA vs. RFA comes in... In a way you are correct, they don't HAVE to do anything at all! Because he’s unrestricted, there’s no time left on his contract, they’re not required necessarily to pay him any more. But because he’s become somewhat liked in Washington, I could see them offering a small contract, with the idea that he’ll play, but could likely be bought out before the season starts to avoid conflict. SORRY I SHOULD HAVE MADE THAT MORE CLEAR MY B. 

It’s more of a courtesy sign than anything else. They won’t let Batya go without a goodbye is, I guess, what I’m saying

[simplestupideverything]

Thanks for your thoughts!! They are always so good! I guess this means that someone could be traded today (or tomorrow?) 😱😱😱

Oh yes! I’d be waiting over the next week tbh!

[simplestupideverything]

Omg that video is so cool, thanks for sharing! You were great in it and so entertaining (I don’t even know that show at all). How do you know so much about it? I look forward to seeing more of these videos!! So glad you’re a caps fan 🙃🙃🙃 and I wanna know all your thoughts on signings, trades, and what will happen to our RFAs!

I know so much because I helped film a web series recapping the final season with the stars! Which can be found here:  Farewell to Shadowhunters

And yes, I’m a die-hard Caps fan! My takes as of now: Hagelin deal is solid. I’ve said before that I hate long deals because they rarely perform, but I think 4 years is incredibly reasonable, especially for the price they’re getting and the way he performed after the trade was worthy of such. Nisky was hard to lose, but it was time. He’s not been himself, and I’m hoping with a new team he’ll regain the confidence he’s had in previous seasons.  NOW TO UFA’s:  Conno and DSP: Connolly will get an offer, I’ll be dead shocked if he doesn’t. He played well despite a flailing post-season Caps team. The only way he wouldn’t would be to make room for Burakovsky, which I think would be a mistake. DSP I’m less certain of. Reirdan didn’t take to him at all last season, and despite the fact that Washington adores him, I’m not sure he’s done enough to stay. 

Brooks Orpik: Will likely be bought out. End his days as a Cap. Go out on a somewhat high.  RFA’s: Burakovsky: I know he’s the one everyone is wondering about, and rightfully so. With his contract on the line, he didn’t perform. Which is quite terrible, because we know he can. I think a trade is likely here... and I’ve said it for a while, I think it’s the smart move. Burky is what I call a ‘mirror player’... he plays at the level of the men next to him. However, it’s illogical to put him on a line with Ovi and Backy. He should go to a team that doesn’t need depth, they need a hail mary (ahem Kings or Ducks). But I wouldn’t be shocked if the organization pulled a plot twist on us. They could sign him... but it will be for farrrr less money than he’s making now, which is unrealistic in every capacity. With the draft and everything coming up, it would make sense to ship him for some picks with lower cap hits. Jaskin: I think he’ll stay. For consistency and fourth line alone. He didn’t make an overwhelming impression on me, and nor the organization. He’s a great healthy scratch option with a low cap hit. I see him staying.  Stephenson: I see Stephenson as a Jaskin who could possibly be a pawn. It’s likely he’ll stay (same reasons as Jaskin above) but he could be traded for depth on another team. I’d say he’s second on the chopping block next to Burky. The Caps could get some low risk, maybe high reward players for Stephenson. He’s a name I would be expected to be thrown around on draft day.  Vrana: He’s staying. I’ll be shocked if he doesn’t. He’s progressed phenomenally since joining the game. The only issue will be price. I think he’s smart enough not to pull a William Nylander, but he’ll be asking a lot. Further solidifying the need to trade Burky and/or Stephenson. 

Djoos: This is a heads or tails situation. I genuinely can’t call it. On one hand, Djoos is talented, he’s progressed at a steady rate, he doesn’t make stupid decisions. On the other, he was injured a lot last season. That’s essentially money draining to a sitting duck. If I had to predict, I’d say they keep him unless promised someone better for less money, which is unlikely. It would make more sense to trade some forwards for young defensemen than get rid of Djoos.

There are my takes peeps! As always, feel free to come leave healthy debate in my inbox... just keep it clean babes  :) 

[simplestupideverything]

Hey Kelsey! What’s up?

nothing much boo!

[simplestupideverything]

Omg love your videos sm! You talk like John mulaney but about sports lol

THIS IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT I HAVE EVER RECEIVED

[simplestupideverything]

TV Guide on Instagram: “We live in an office divided— @kelseygracepfeifer is OBSESSED with @thesociety, and @play_tones has never seen it... so naturally, we're…”

240 Likes, 18 Comments - TV Guide (@tvguide) on Instagram: “We live in an office divided— @kelseygracepfeifer is OBSESSED with @thesociety, and @play_tones has…”

So for our second episode of “Never Before Seen” I made my work bud describe The Society without ever having seen an episode.

I may be biased, but as a huge fan of the show I actually think this is hilarious

[simplestupideverything]

TV Guide on Instagram: “Never Before Seen is a show where we have show experts ask someone who has never seen a show... to explain that show (lots of showing…”

346 Likes, 26 Comments - TV Guide (@tvguide) on Instagram: “Never Before Seen is a show where we have show experts ask someone who has never seen a show... to…”

So I have a show where we ask someone who has never seen a show... to describe said show.  I was lucky enough to do Shadowhunters— a show I’ve always been interested in watching, just never gotten around to! 

At the end of this episode, I say I’m going to watch an episode... I’ve actually put away time to binge the entire series and write down my reactions to it! I’m still deciding whether I want to do that on tumblr or twitter though hahah. LMK what you all think!

[simplestupideverything]

Hey y’all, I know a lot of you follow me for sports content, and I do promise I’ll post more on that soon! But with my new job, I’ve gotten amazing opportunities and I’d really like to share those too! Specifically, a show I produce on IGTV. So just because my content changes a bit, I hope you’ll support me :) 

love you all!

[simplestupideverything]

OMG!! Thank you! Watching that beautiful Tom Wilson video first ha!

Haha amazing! I’m so glad I could help!

[simplestupideverything]

The important thing is that I think I’m funny. Though approval from the @coloradoavalanche account also is validating

[simplestupideverything]

i would love a link to your videos! i never got to actually see them before you unlisted them. i came across some gifs and was DYING. it just reminded me so much of how i talk about hockey to my friends. youre so funny and id love to be able to watch the videos. hope youre doing well!

So this is the absolute sweetest and I don’t deserve it at all! You are the best. 

Here’s a link to the masterpost of all of my videos!

[simplestupideverything]

why are some Pisces so emotionally closed off like I’ve met some who open up when you get to know them but I don’t even know what this question is but I like Pisces but I find that they can be rude when it comes to others feelings but expect everyone to drop everything and list to their feelings instead. And I find they enjoy making it obvious they dont care about your feelings and tell you ever chance you get. At least the ones I’ve met do this

Welcome to Pisces my dear! They’re complicated and mercurial, and if they’re still immature, it’s awful. I’ve said on my podcast that I don’t hate Pisces, and I don’t. But I find them to be the most judgemental sign by far (Taurus, you aren’t far behind) and so when they see someone’s feelings and don’t believe their situation is ‘as bad’ as whatever they’re going through, they can get a bit volatile. I’m a big fan of cutting out toxicity, so if you don’t vibe with Pisces, you don’t necessarily have to!

[simplestupideverything]

I loved your article!!! While i was reading it realized something kinda interesting. See, i’m 18 and i got into the Caps and hockey last season during the preseason. Most of the crap i get comes from adult men esp when it comes to my fav player and how many teams i like. They’re confused when i say my fav player is Backstrom and angry when i say i like more than one team. But i don’t have that issue with people my age.

2/2: I hit ask before i was done. As i was saying, i don’t really have that issue with people my age. Idk if it’s bec they’re like “oh you like hockey? That’s cool” or some other reason. I’ve ranted on a bit but i felt like you should know this since we all deal with this in same shape or form.

I think age has a lot to do with it too! I talk hockey with my best co-worker friend all the time and he’s only about 5 years older than me, and all about women loving sports (I mean, he’s a good dude in general) but the minute I talk to someone over the age of 35, it can get dicey. All I’d say is to just keep your head. Love who you love!

[simplestupideverything]

Can I please have the link to your unlisted videos! I have only seen gifs and they look so funny!

Sure! SORRY I AM SO LATE GETTING TO THESE ASKS

My life has been hectic lately and I’m working on such cool stuff with my actual job (GIFs of which I might start making just for shits)

Here’s the list of my videos (chronologically, but I might just put some notes/gifs by them anyway)

The Bare Minimum You Need To Know About Hockey: https://youtu.be/lBzLKDbjwVk

The Bare Minimum You Need to Know About The Stanley Cup Playoffs/ The Stanley Cup Finals: https://youtu.be/qz-bnNdPElM

which spawned these gifs (all gifs made by @nationalhockeeleague)

Stanley Cup Finals- Game 1 Recap: https://youtu.be/x6YN2alPCqk

I’m insanely proud of this video. But I’m prouder of the GIFs

Recap of The Stanley Cup Finals- Games 2 & 3: https://youtu.be/7bburhQot_k

This video is blasé but I still love it

Stanley Cup Finals- Games 4 & 5 Recap: https://youtu.be/kAKdyUsUjyo

This was a doozy

RECAP- LIFE AND THE OFFSEASON: https://youtu.be/EuJykwh9BII

Me talking about almost getting attacked in Texas + Draft shit

Thrift Shop Challenge- Des Moines: https://youtu.be/XKfVf592f-c

Non-hockey, but my favorite video on my channel

My Best Friend Reacts to Hockey Players: https://youtu.be/x196ebFyPGo

This is my most popular vid, and I’d like to this it’s because of our intoxicating friendship, but I’m largely sure it’s because of my takes on Tuukka Rask

Regular Season Vids:

Game 1- Free Willy: https://youtu.be/FBsX_NCtFHk

Games 2, 3, & 4: Some Burakontroversy: https://youtu.be/3QuWlDv-QYE

Which gave me one of my fav quotes

Game 5: TorontNO: https://youtu.be/MAf8tvtRsuA

Wash VS. Pitt- Crocby: https://youtu.be/EZ-TFX50gDY

In which I am sick and look like a Strome

The only two videos I didn’t include were the video about my diagnosis (for those who don’t know, I have a rare pancreatic condition called Sphincter of Oddi Dysfunction) because it’s really emotional and hard for me to watch. I’ve just had my second surgery in two months because of it (last week) so, in my recovery, I’m not sure I’m ready to face it just yet. 

The second is “Reacting to Hockey Players with My Niece” because it felt really forced, and I was never thrilled with the final edit. SO THAT’S IT FOLKS. There’s a large part of me that would love to start making videos again, but idk if I can with my new job and such. Til then, here they are!