My name is JJ and I have a biopsychological obsession to mood-alter (#addiction). I was a full-blown chronic alcoholic by 26... Next month will be six years since I’ve had a drink, 18 months since I’ve fked with opiates. I was the next bad decision from my own own episode of Intervention. Because I have made questionable choices while aligned with unsavory people i can't say I'm almost 18 months clean. But it has been 71 months since I had a hangover, 17 months since I almost died and 1 month of abstinence.
But I am Wonder Woman, don’t get confused about that. My kids will reiterate that. but if I am not working on myself daily I am just Wonder Woman on drugs or Wonder Woman wishing I was on drugs and that’s a miserable place to be full of nothing but wasted potential. If someone like me can change we have been blessed by a higher power. All of us.
There is no defense but to accept #spiritualhelp. #divineintervention won't say:
“Quit now or die. Quit now or lose your kids. Quit now or lose your family. Quit now or die."—- that’s the shit everyone else is already telling us. We get it.
divine intervention says, gentle and firm:
“It makes sense you are this way, given your experiences, who you’ve encountered and your heart. How would you be any other way? You are how you should be. And ITS TIME TO CHANGE!" —- and that gentle, loving kindness will hit us like a ton of goddamn bricks and THATS when we change.
I don’t shy away from #selfawareness like a timid child hiding behind their mother. I embrace it like an old friend who has my best interests in mind, thankful it chose me and I heard it. I don’t make life choices with one foot in and one foot out, I jump in with both feet. I don’t say things I can’t back up. I have made strides to become honest with myself, my tribe and perfect strangers.
You won't catch me excusing my or anyone's behavior “cuz drugs." Like ALL of us I am the same drunk, high, sober if I am not working on me
If we do you evil when we are high, we are evil. If we have 1 million excuses lined up for when we are high, we are excuse-makers. Period. If we lie through our teeth when caught red-handed, and lie to cover up the last lie, we are liars. Sober or not. **DRUNK PEOPLE SPEAK THEIR SOBER MINDS** sorry, we do.
Don’t make excuses for anyone because “they are normally so ___ when they aren’t using.” No, they aren’t so ____, they are filled with the same anger, evil, narcissism, ego and bad intentions as when high **if they aren’t following a design for living** and putting substances in our bodies is a symptom of what's in our hearts, not the other way around. It’s not drugs and alcohol that make us miserable people, it is because we are miserable people that we use drugs and alcohol. Take away the substances and we are still the same miserable people **unless we do work!!**
So it should come as no surprise to anyone that I don’t take kindly to the slandering of my name, spreading of lies and deliberate attempts to paint a picture of me that is anything less than truthful to fit the agenda of egocentric narcissist with the same disease, the same struggles, at the same fork in the road who chose to stay sick. That's abhorrent behavior and it should not be tolerated.
Excusing the behavior saying “they’re treating you this way cuz drugs.” frankly, we don’t give a fuck why they're treating us this way. They're treating us this way. It doesn't passify, and doesn’t justify the fact they are evil rn, and hurting someone so they can continue living a selfish, isolated, high and mighty, worthless life.
No one ever had to excuse my behavior like that. It doesn’t mean people haven’t been hurt in my wake. It means I’ve never done anything with evil intentions because my heart has always been golden. That who I am in any state of mind.
an imperfect, fallible person with a good heart and honest intentions who is trying really hard so just stop
