sirius.simp

Laura || they/she || ig: @sirius.simp

[sirius-simpp]

Sirius: Hey guess what?

Lily: Bitch, with the way you live, I have no idea.

[sirius-simpp]

I firmly believe that whenever the squad went out to the beach, Lily, Dorcas, and Remus would have to bring beach toys for James, Marlene, and Sirius so that they could tan without interruptions.

[sirius-simpp]

James: Bro I’m like 10 times hotter in my deer form.

Sirius: 10 times 0 is still 0.

[sirius-simpp]

at a concert

Remus: Excuse me, I lost my boyfriend, could I make an announcement?

Person at desk: Of course.

Remus: *leans into mic* Goodbye you little shit.

[sirius-simpp]

Remus: *to the tune of final countdown* It’s a mental breakdown.

Sirius: *off-key kazooing*

[sirius-simpp]

Sirius: So I’ll start by introducing myself. I’m-

*Remus walks into room*

Sirius: Very gay and very single.

[sirius-simpp]

Sirius: *exists*

Remus: *gay panics*

Remus: *exists*

Sirius: *gay panics*

[sirius-simpp]

Sirius: I am good at identifying birds.

Lily: Okay, what about the ones flying over us right now.

Sirius: Yup, those are definitely birds.

[sirius-simpp]

Sirius: *gracefully flips over a quesadilla*

Sirius: Anyone would be lucky to have me.

[sirius-simpp]

*planning pranks*

Sirius: Am I right, Lily?

Lily: I’m almost certain that you’re not but to be fair, I wasn’t listening.

[sirius-simpp]

James: Sometimes I drink milk straight from the container.

Sirius: The cow?

James: What?!?

Remus: Sirius? W H Y?

[sirius-simpp]

Remus: So, I like this guys and I want to know your opinion on him.

Lily: Send a pic.

Remus: *sends pic of sirius*

Remus: Thought?

Lily: And prayers.

[sirius-simpp]

James: are you ok?

Remus: i’m fine.

Sirius: *in arrested development narrator voice* that was a lie

[sirius-simpp]

Sirius: Look, on the count of three, we’re both going to apologize.

Sirius: One… Two… Three!

Regulus:

Sirius:

Sirius: Well now I’m just disappointed in the both of us.

[sirius-simpp]

James: I wrote you a song :)

Lily: Oh did you?

James: Yup. And I’ll give you a hint. It’s named after a flower <3

Lily: So, Lily?

James: No… That would‘ve been a lot better.

[sirius-simpp]

Sirius: Can you tuck me in?

James: ??? You just handed me a shovel.

Sirius: Yea if you could just spread the dirt as evenly as you can thanks.

[sirius-simpp]

Remus: I’m giving up chocolate for a month.

Sirius: Really?

Remus: Oh that came out wrong.

Remus: I’m giving up. Chocolate for a month.

Sirius: Okay now THAT makes sense