Sir Skwerly @sirskwerly - Tumblr Blog

carolinesfantasy

dndfantasyworld

bambi-eyes

flashy-title-deactivated2023090

Oh hi

headspace-hotel

so mad that our takeaway from the mask thing hasn't been "wait, so we could have been getting like 80% fewer colds and viruses this entire time?"

flashy-title-deactivated2023090

All that’s missing is you

poikaboo

Really genuinely feel like we need to bring back internet safety classes.

poikaboo

like this isn’t about “no one on the internet is your friend” it’s about “everyone on the internet can be entirely anonymous and disappear at a moment’s notice and you need to be aware of that and be sure of people’s intentions” it’s about “that person might be really nice and giving or they might be scamming you and you need to be able to tell the difference” it’s about “you need to be sure that the link you’re clicking on is going to take you to the right place”

it’s basic stuff i’m not trying to scare people but you need! to practice healthy skepticism online!!

taylortheslut-deactivated201910

consensualdomination

A genuine interaction I had with a sub last week:

Sub (S): I think I'd be okay sharing some photos eventually, just not right now and nothing too revealing

Me (M): Okay, that's completely fair. You never have to show more than you want to!

*Ten minutes later, mid-session*

S: FUck, I'm so melted daddy

M: It's adorable how broken you've become so quickly

S: Fuck yes I'm so broken I'll do anything for you

M: Oh? Then beg to let me see what my new pet looks like

S: (Anxious) ...please, Daddy

M: Please, what?

S: Please let me show you, Daddy

M: Much better. Permission denied.

S: (Startled) Wait what?

M: You did very well. Permission denied.

S: (Now desperate) Please, daddy!

M: Please what?

S: Please let me show you, I need to

M: Aww how cute! Permission denied.

S: FUck I'm so broken, please please I need to show you how desperate I am how much I need you

M: Hahahah

S: Pleaseeeee

M: Well let's see...

*Fully wakes up the sub, makes sure they are awake, aware, not being affected, fully able to consent without pressure*

M: Now then, you certainly don't have to, but do you still want to?

S: Yes yes please Daddy I consent I consent I consent please let me show you

M: Much better. Permission granted.

Please note: The important piece here is I would not let them show me anything until they were awake, aware, & cognizant. While no limits were ever crossed during this play, even once the sub sent me pictures, it's important to make sure at all times that consent is respected. The sub did not consent to being coerced into sending anything while under, so it was only once awake and aware that I let them. Since then, they have on another separate occasion begged me to let them show me themselves, without prompting. While the manipulation aspect is incredibly hot, it stops being hot the moment it becomes genuine non-consensual manipulation. To any doms reading this, please keep that in mind.

homunculus-argument

Imagine if you met someone who can't eat watermelon. Not that they're allergic or unable somehow, but they just haven't figured out how to do that. So you're like "what the hell do you mean? it works just like eating anything else, you open your mouth, sink your teeth in, take a bite and chew. If you can bite, chew and swallow, you should be able to eat a watermelon."

And they agree that yes, they do know how to eat, in theory. The problem is the watermelon. Surely, if they figured out where to start, they'd figure out how to do it, but they have no clue how to get started with it.

This goes back and forth. No, it's not an emotional issue, they're not afraid of the watermelon. They can eat any other fruit, other sweet things, and other watery things ("it's watery?" they ask you). Is it the colour? Do they have a problem eating things that are green on the outside and red on the inside?

"It's red on the inside?"

Wait, they've never seen the inside? At this point you have to ask them how, exactly, they eat the watermelon. So to demonstrate, they take a whole, round, uncut watermelon, and try to bite straight into it. Even if they could bite through the crust, there's no way to get human jaws around it.

"Oh, you're supposed to cut it first. You cut the crust open and only chew through the insides."

And they had no idea. All their life this person has had no idea how to eat a watermelon, despite of being told again and again and again that it's easy, it's ridiculous to struggle with something so simple, there's no way that someone just can't eat a watermelon, how can you even mange to be bad at something as fucking simple as eating watermelon.

If someone can't do something after being repeatedly told to "just do it", there might be some key component missing that one side has no idea about, and the other side assumed was so obvious it goes without mention.

therainstheyaredropping

Yep.

https://drmaciver.substack.com/p/how-to-do-everything had a nice list of additional examples like this, with (non-)obvious major insights with regard to opening stitched bags, cleaning your bathroom floor, using a search engine, catching a ball, pinging somebody, proving a theorem, playing sudoku, passing as “normal”, improving your writing, generating novel ideas, and solving your problem.

If you’d asked me six months ago how to get better at something, I’d probably have pointed you to how to do hard things. I still think this is a good approach and you should do it, but I now think it’s the wrong starting point and I’ve been undervaluing small insights. [...]

I think my revised belief is that if you are stuck at how to get better at something, spend a little while assuming there’s just some trick to it you’ve missed. You can try to generate the trick yourself, but it’s probably easier to learn it by observing someone else being good at the thing, asking them some questions, and seeing if you have any lightbulb moment.

hergan416

My fiance played the clarinet when he was in school. When he was first learning to play, he rented an instrument from the school to learn on. He was the last chair clarinet, had been for years, because he could not make notes that required the register key. For years, they kept making him do embrature exercises and he started to get a few notes, with lots of effort. Eventually he had to get private lessons to stay in band.

Every time he tells me this story, his frustration by this point in the story, years later, is evident. He still sounds frustrated by it, despite all the time that passed. Teachers had been giving him crap for years because he hadn't been making much progress with the instrument.

When he got to the private instructor, she acknowledged his frustration, and asked him to try to play for her. He did, and she saw all he was doing. She then did something no one else had done before. She asked him to put his mouthpiece on a different clarinet and try to play the same notes. Like magic, it worked. She looked at the clarinet he had been using and found that the school's clarinet needed it's pads replaced.

He went from last chair to first chair nearly overnight, having been taught far more techniques than typically taught at that age just to overcome the broken instrument preventing him from making noise.

Sometimes you don't need to brute force a problem. Sometimes your clarinet is just broken.

built-for-longing

reblog to give this person you rb’d it from the strength to complete their tasks

mermaids-pearl

loveybunnie

Oh no I kinda want to come home and see this on the bed and have someone come up behind me and say “I heard you call yourself bunny, so now I’m gonna make you one” and then force the butt plug and ears and everything else on me and then fuck me face down ass up while I make little noises as you fuck me