Hi, it’s Luna, I have unfortunate news for anyone who wanted to see the end of this fic:
I’m abandoning it, and I will never return to it or finish it.
I do have a reason for it, it’s something I mentioned in chapter 9’s author note. I don’t know if anyone reads those since they’re at the end of the chapter but to reiterate, I don’t have any motivation or desire to finish this fic. One thing about me is that I don’t like writing fanfic for visual novels since (for me) the game the character is from is enough and all the x reader (characterxcharacter is fine, especially with the li if I find it funny) fanfic boils down to just headcanons, which is fine for side characters like how 5012 started as, but now that adwd2 is coming at the beginning of next year, he’s going to be a love interest, so my step out of my shell is kinda backfiring on me; The demo killed a lot of my motivation for the fic but I thought I’d be fine to just speedrun the fic but I can’t and won’t force myself to do something I don’t want to. Plus, I have a lot of other fics I’d like to work on and (hopefully) finish.
On top of all of that I am about to start my senior year of high school, so college prep classes and fafsa and applying and I’m taking at least 1 AP course this year (my second overall, and I don’t know if I’ll get the other I signed up for), and I really don’t wanna be chained by I fic I have no motivation to complete while trying to do my assignments.
But for anyone who wants it, i do have some bits and peices of things for later chapters that i did write (under the cut)
Chapters 10-14 I did not write
Chapter 15:
Looking at you in his arms, Onyx realized something was.. different about you, but he didn’t know what exactly it was. It wasn’t your soul, that had stayed just as bright. It also wasn’t anything with your physical appearance, that had stayed mostly the same. But there was something off about your face, in a good way, he supposed, but still off. He had always acknowledged your beauty, it would be breaking his oath if he said otherwise, but you seem to be somehow more beautiful in this moment. Half awake, slightly drooling on his shirt (a little gross, but he found it endearing), you looked… peaceful, and that seemed to stir something in him. He went through all his options, but the only word that stuck was love, something he is not allowed to give a human.
Chapters 16-18 I did not write
Chapter 19 (completely finished believe it or not):
You usually don’t get last-minute anxiety, but right now you did. Your round was tomorrow, your death was tomorrow, too many things were tomorrow, actually. You already set up a system for everyone after Onyx had reaped your soul; Your best friend gets your apartment, somehow your rent was cheaper than theirs, your parents can have any belongings of yours that they want (well, except for one thing, I’ll get to that), they are very sentimental people and you didn’t exactly like the whole dying without them getting time to prepare thing but such is life, you guessed.
You neatly packed every little item you prepared internally and externally, every letter, every part of your room to be easily removable, every small memory you knew they would look fondly on afterwards, hell, you even ate out everything in your fridge just so it wouldn’t be a hassle to clean.
But all that being said, what does Onyx get? The relationship (if you can even call it that) is just you crossing off an item on your bucket list, it’s not exactly real even if some of the feelings involved are; It makes you feel like dick, really, you’re toying with not just his feelings but your own and nothing can really patch whatever kind of scar that’s gonna leave on him.
You do have something to give him though, a necklace, well, it’s a locket but whatever, specifics don’t matter when it’s a dying gift. He already has one and you’re not exactly sure what it’s for, but it feels kinda pointless now to ask about it since, y’know, dying tomorrow, but hopefully he’ll like it.
Chapter 20 (almost done):
After you received your diploma, you ran straight to your parents with open arms. You were upset you didn’t place, sure, but you had three of the best people in your life watching you do what you love.
Your dad was the first to take hold of you, ruffling your bun slightly in the process, you then hugged your mom. “You did so well out there, I almost shed tears” she said holding your face in her hands, “What place did you get?” she followed up with. “Fourth,” you said, swallowing the pride you didn’t even know was there. “But I’m just happy you two and my boyfriend were here.” You swear you saw a flash of mischief in her eyes before your dad asked “Speaking of, where is he?”
Good.. question you thought. Looking around at all the hustle and bustle of people meeting with loved ones, you realize: you hadn’t seen him at all today. So that leaves one question, where is he? He said he was here when you texted him earlier. “I don’t.. know” you said, trying to spot his purple highlights in the crowd. Your dad just frowned seeing your confusion, you look back with a discontented look on your face. “It might take a while to find him, so you two can head to the restaurant and we’ll just meet you there.” They both were giving you sympathetic looks now, maybe taking his absence as ditching. But he said he would do anything he could to be here and he said he was here, and that man literally can not lie, so he’s definitely here. “Well, we’ll be off then, just tell us if you need anything” your mom said, gently rubbing your arm. Fortunately for you (and probably their sanities), you notice some familiar purple in your peripheral. Beaming, you gesture for your creators to wait before running towards the love of your life.
“Onyx!”
Hearing his name, the man turned around to see the only one who embodies the sunlight running at him. You practically threw yourself around him, ready to scold him for scaring you, but he kissed you before any words could come out of your mouth. You were sure that there were cameras focused on this, but you didn’t care, pulling back you started to drag him towards where your parents were waiting.
First it was your dad, then your mom, their faces twisted into an unrecognizable emotion. Maybe shock, maybe contempt, maybe paralysis? You weren’t sure, in fact you’re pretty sure your dad mouthed ‘no way’ when he saw Onyx. He hasn’t said anything to break the silence, so, it must be you who breaks the ice. “Handsome, right?” you had joked, motioning your hands around his face with what was probably too much cockiness in your voice. Their faces didn’t change, so you turned to Onyx to tell him to say something—
He had the same look on his face.. This is weird, there’s something that they didn’t tell you growing up, it has to be, cause why do they all look like that? If there is something they hid from you, what role does Onyx even play in that?
After a very uncomfortable amount of silence your mom said “There’s something we all need to talk about. Outside. Away from people.” Well that doesn’t make me any less nervous, mom you thought, to get this over with, you might as well go with it.
“Okay..” Once you said that, your parents sped off. Yeah, there’s definitely something that they’re hiding. You grabbed Onyx’s hand, probably squeezing it a little harder than intended, but right now you didn’t care, you wanted answers.
Casper and his Sunshine were puzzled, and honestly? Puzzled is an understatement. “What do we tell them?” “I.. I’m not sure…” They want their child to be happy, sure, but fraternizing with the man who tried to kill them? That’s a tough one, because how do you explain to your bright-eyed child that their boyfriend tried to kill you two before they were even considered to exist? You probably shouldn’t, wouldn’t, but you had to at some point, right? Yeah, this going to be one awkward dinner conversation
Due to the overwhelmingly packed restaurant, the conversation could not happen there. The dinner was about as awkward as the meetup after the performance, you were starting to become upset, no one was saying anything other than “Can you pass me the pepper shaker?” and “Do you need a refill of your drink when the waiter gets back over here?” And to be entirely honest? It was more than upsetting, it was infuriating.
At one point you had to excuse yourself to the bathroom before you started an exasperated screaming match at the table. You looked into the mirror, thankful that no one else was in the bathroom. You’re an adult, why won’t they tell you the full story? If he recognized them, why didn’t Onyx fucking say shit? All you had were questions and not answers, you wanted to have a peaceful evening with your boyfriend and your parents, not an extremely uncomfortable dinner with a silent table of strangers.
Speaking of, the table was now slightly more lively without you, in a bad way, in the worst way possible. “Why didn’t you tell them?” Casper broke the silence first, he couldn’t help it. “I didn’t know they were your child, 8394” “Cut the shit, I have a human name and so do you now, since you accept it so easily, Onyx.” The use of the name against him was not a good feeling, it made him angry. “You’re reaping their soul today, aren’t you?” Clearly Sunshine had a desire to de-escalate this before it even got escalated, “…Yes.” Onyx had forgotten about that, and it hurt to say, cause he had grown attached to you
Make himself comfortable he did, he was a bit too curious about your lack of family pictures, usually humans had those but maybe you just didn’t feel like printing things out.
After a while it was kind of boring, how long were you planning on staying in that shower? He eventually started walking around, almost pacing just to see what else was in sight; You had quite a lot of collections; stuff like figures, albums, posters, and whatnot. All of it was kind of charming, it was very human, it was very you.
You did eventually come out of the bathroom, your face was kinda wet still. “Did he answer?” “Not yet.” “UGH.” 5012 had to stifle a laugh at your reaction. “Anyway, do you think he’ll get suspicious about that question?” “I don’t see why he wouldn’t be.” “Eh, fair. I’m never this curious about it.”
“Did you really have to come here to tell me this? I feel like we could’ve done this over text..” “I find it more efficient to talk about certain matters in person.” “I mean I guess, bro.” “I do have more work to do, so I will now be leaving.” “Uh.. guess I’ll update you then?” “Please do, goodbye.”
divider credit: @mieluno
small confession: I don’t like writing fics for visual novels, I usually am satisfied with what the game gives me for the love interests, if I like a side character more or the story was laking to me i usually just kind of deal with it and move on. I started this and was comfortable with it because 5012 was a nrc, he was a side character that was just essential to the dlc’s plot and I had thought ‘oh he’s never going to get anything so i’ll just write a fic about him.’ as well as the fact that most of the fandom seemed to like him a lot. but then, lo and fucking behold, adwd2 gets announced and the demo comes and now he IS going to be a rc, so now I’m stressing myself out trying to finish this before january 1st ;-;
I am rapidly losing motivation and interest in finishing this fic even though I want to, but on the other hand I don’t wanna drop the fic after the game comes out. It honestly does not help that my school comes back for the full second week of august for a new school year and this year I will be a senior in high school and I wanna finish the remaining chapters just so I can schedule them and not have to think about it until it’s done, but this fic has become my entire summer and i don’t like that. But I’ll see if I can finish this, so until I say I’m dropping it, it’ll still get its usual updates :)
I hate that there's no room for nonbinary people in media. When a character's gender is "ambiguous" (neither seen as masculine nor feminine) and solely referred to with neutral terms such as "they/them" and person, individual, etc, people can't stand that. They can't stand the idea that a nonbinary person wouldn't want to be a boy or girl, isn't a boy or a girl. They have to be a girlthing or a boything (why are all nonbinary people things? Why is it never girlenby or boyenby?), they have to be transfem or transmasc. When they're put into relationships, they have to be either lesbian or gay. Nobody can be cenelian or enbian or diamoric or gai or strayt or trixic or toric. That doesn't exist.
I'm sick of it. I'm sick of seeing nonbinarity be shoved into category after category after category when the whole point of being nonbinary is that we want to opt out.
What the hell was that? You wondered as you sat up, rubbing your eyes. Nothing seemed to had fallen, so you were confused on where the sound came from; You opted to not investigate, it was so early in the morning it had to have been a bird just going head-first into your balcony door, so you laid back down.
knock
knock
knock
You rolled over and covered your ears with the pillow, you couldn’t tell if it was the front door or the balcony door but either way, it was early as hell, and you were not going to answer it; You probably should, but who cares? You sure as hell don’t.
knock
knock
knock
That was it, you had to see who the hell wanted your attention so badly so early in the damn morning. You checked your front door first, seems reasonable enough, a bird is not going to peck at your window for 15 minutes straight. There was no one there, so either they left or a bird was pecking at your balcony door for that long. You closed the door and went back to your room, only to see a small figure standing on your balcony.
Ah, it’s Onyx, checks out, but why at this hour?
”What? You’ve been knocking for almost 20 minutes, what could you possibly want?” He didn’t say anything and just sauntered in, hopping on your bed like he owned the place. “Hello? Why are you here?” “I have something to discuss with you, mortal.” “Yeah, I figured, spit it out.” “Do you know what your soul does?” “No not really, kind of didn’t know it was of value to you until like 2 weeks ago, why?” “My soul sickness seemed to have healed itself after my visit.” “And you think I did it?” “Precisely. Have you ever had an instance of an injury just suddenly healing itself?” You had to think about that one, you weren’t very accident prone when you were younger, your mom was, but she didn’t have to do much, you’d just hold her hand like how she did to you and act…
Wait.
“Some of my mom’s small little accidental cuts would heal if I acted like I was a magic little child doctor, but I don’t think I did that.” “Hm.. I have a working theory that your soul can heal things.” “I honestly wonder if you believe me when I say my dad used to be a grim reaper,” “I do, you’ve said too much for it to be a lie, but what are you getting at, human?” “I could ask him? He might know.” “It is 5 in the morning, do you truly think he’d answer at this moment?” No, no he wouldn’t, but he didn’t need to know that. “Even if he doesn’t answer right now we can come back to this conversation later.”
A small brief second of silence fell over the room before you added “Also can you un-cat yourself? I feel weird." That said, you went back to typing out the text to your father. In the background, 5012 was retiring his glamour and sitting back down on your bed, looking around again since he didn’t get a good look last time he was there.
“‘Kay, I’m done, let’s see if he sets a new record for the shortest amount of time before he answers me.” “That is a strange thing to keep track of.” “Yeah, but he takes forever to answer my texts.” “I’m oddly curious, what’s his current record?” “3 hours, honestly, I’ll celebrate the day he gets under an hour.” “Does he do that to your mother as well?” “No!! He answers her immediately! It’s crazy.” He chuckled at that, you could get used to hearing that.
You figured you might as well start getting ready since you’re already up. “Uh, Onyx? Do you mind waiting for me while I get ready, you kinda woke me up really early..” “How many times do I have to tell you… No, I do not mind.” “Cool, make yourself comfortable.”
divider credit: @mieluno
I like blue-balling you guys if you haven’t noticed, the next chapter will be a direct continuation, don’t worry
Your mom was finally free enough to call and chat a bit so you gave her a few life updates, dancing around the fact that there was a whole ass man that you were talking to.
“Yeah, but uh, that’s been my life lately.” “You said you met someone at the coffee shop?” Oh yay, you forgot you told her about that, and now she’s not gonna let it go. “Yeah, we’ve been talking,” “Ooh, spill!” “I’m not sure if he likes me like that, but we are getting to be friends somewhat.” “You’re my child, you have the mythical pull game of being a dumbass, just wait.” “Mom..” She laughed at your pouting. She’s not wrong, but it would be nice if she didn’t call you a dumbass to your face, y’know?
“Also, Mom, uh, are you two gonna be free anytime soon?” “Um, no, sorry. It’s a surprisingly busy season, we don’t know why.” “Aw..” “Yeah, sorry, sweetie.” “It’s okay, I love you, bye!” “Bye, I love you too!”
Great. At least he promised to let you see them before you go, but it still sucks, bro. But you aren’t just gonna sit around and mope all day, might as well do something you enjoy, like watching copious amounts of Youtube! Arming yourself with your laptop and some food you got to work prowling for a decently long video to watch; You settled on a 17 hour long creepypasta iceberg video, there wasn’t much to look at on the screen but you didn’t feel like watching a letsplay.
Anywho, enough with you, back with Mr. Nonchalant, he forgot his phone, no wonder he missed the wonderwall of notifications. So, when eventually got back to his office to do important filing things, he checked, out of habit, for your name in his Sahara desert ass phone. There were no notifications from the total of 3 (not pre-installed) apps he had, weird, you never miss your spam hour, but he didn’t check in to see where it was, it’s not like he missed it dearly (or did he? 🤨).
divider credit: @mieluno
I am once again asking you to trust the process, the chapters will get longer, I swear
That was so confusing, it stayed with you for a while, why did he come even if he wasn’t feeling well? You said what you needed to, he didn’t need to do all that. But today was a normal day, coffee, training, reel spam, go home.
For 5012 on the other hand, was out and about and confused. He felt better? And he didn’t know why, maybe his theory was right. He figured that 8394 would know, seeing as his mortal had the same type of soul, but he isn’t going through the trouble of finding him and asking, plus, why on Earth would he want to see him? So he stuck to the idea that his theory was correct.
He was thrilled to see that you were back to your usual irritating self, even if he’d prefer you were quiet like how you were yesterday. That was a weird thought for him, he usually doesn’t care about people like that, but you’d probably be worse if you were sad all the time.
The way people are so surprised and defensive to hear that Islamophobia is institutionalized in america..the same nation/colony that literally has a whole policing body, TSA, that is known to specifically profile muslims. The same nation that created watchlists and no fly lists of mostly muslims..the same nation that wiretapped, entrapped, imprisoned thousands of muslims post 9/11. The same nation that encouraged banks around the world to adopt algorithms that will randomly blacklist bank users with arabic names, the same nation that has warred and bombed countries with majority muslim demographics? This is surprising to some people. Okay
note: incase you're seeing this out in the wild and you didn't see the note on the hub (not that one, the one i linked), this fic was thought of and strated BEFORE ADWD2's announcement and demo (so like, a few days after Beyond The Bet came out), there is inconsistency with 5012's glamour in here and in the Remnants demo
Oh, hey! Look, the annoying mortal has finally started their daily spam! Is the assumption that 5012 would’ve stuck with if you didn’t just leave those messages to soak, so he sucked it up and picked up his phone to see what the hell you were so quiet about.
> do you have a moment? > i'm not doing so hot atm 🫤
Huh, what could you need to talk about, let’s find out
5012> I will indulge in your troubles, what are they? > i am starting to feel off about everything now > i shouldn't have gone to the gym, it always makes me feel worse 5012> How so?
Little did you know, he had no moments, he was just... being nice? Bored? That's new. But watching your type bubble made him more nervous than he let on. This sudden shift of mood was unexpected, you're usually very happy and cheery and annoying! It's weird!!
> it's just that i'm ready for the competition, but i'm also not? > it's like > what if i mess up? my parents are gonna be there and it's also going to be on tv and that's scary > messing up is human, i know that, but it still scares me > but then there's also this whole arrangement we have > i've been trying to meet my parents before it but they're so busy with their shop and they don't have time
5012 considered his options, but he's not a monster, if you want to see your parents before your soul gets reaped, he'll allow it. Final wishes and what not.
5012> You may see them after if you still cannot meet with them beforehand. > deadass? 5012> Of course, I will not deny you of your last wish. > thank you 🥹 > i don't wanna just die and not be able to talk to them > that's been a new fear of mine lately > but uh anyway > what do you think about everything else? i probably shouldn't focus on it it's the same anxiety i get everytime i have to do one but still
Maybe he shouldn’t have spent so much time watching you, his work wasn’t lacking, obviously, but he was now exhausted and couldn’t really help. He’s not the best at words of comfort and he can’t exactly go to where you are without making himself feel worse… unless? It could work, the sick animals you occasionally see can just be better after you interact with them, so did your friends when you were younger. It’s worth a shot, if it makes him feel worse then never again until he needs to reap your soul.
tap
tap tap tap tap
You looked over to your balcony door and saw that cat, the same cat from when you were a kid. How did it get up here? You live on the twelfth floor, that’s too high for a cat to climb or jump up. You walked over to the door and put your hand on the glass just to make sure you weren’t hallucinating, the cat placed its paw on the glass right where your hand was and said “Mortal, open this door, now.” So you weren’t hallu— wait. The cat spoke, the cat just talked to you, and it sounds really familiar.
“Onyx?” “Don’t call me that, mortal” “What the..” “I’ll explain once you let me inside.” Impatient much? But you obliged, and slid open the door to which he strutted in like he was hot shit. He then reformed into the sexy tumblr man you vividly remembered, looking around, probably taking in how atrocious your apartment looked.
“So… about that explanation?” “Right, so since you supposedly have an ex reaper as a father,” “He is, but carry on with your doubt.” “As I was saying, he has explained the concept of glamours to you, yes?” “No?” He muttered something under his breath before continuing: “Grim Reapers have forms that they take on while doing missions on Earth in order to blend in more, these glamours take form of your soul-” “So you’re spiritually a cat?” “Yes, stop interrupting me, and Reapers are assigned missions in environments that their glamours fit best into.” “So you’ll fit in in most places? That’s cool, also did you like our backyard? You were there quite a lot.” You were expecting a sarcastic response but one never came, his eyes seemed to give you one but not his mouth.
ding!
OH YEAH! Your dad did mention something about how they couldn’t lie. You started cracking up, “YOU CAN’T EVEN SAY SOMETHING SARCASTIC!!!!” He just looked at you like you wronged him the entire time you were dying on your carpet. “So he did tell you about the oath?” “*wheeze* Yeah, took me a second to realize.” “Is my lack of lying amusing to you, mortal?” “Extremely,” you finally sat up, wiping tears away from your eyes, “Woo, I needed that, thanks.” “You’re welcome, I shall be making my exit now.”
Now it was your turn to look wronged. “Why?” “I cannot stay on Earth too long, my soul is already imbalenced.” “How? What could you have even been doing to get soul sickness?” He once again muttered something under his breath, probably displeasure with your father explaining so much to you, but he didn’t respond to your question, he just went back to cat mode and left.
today is the ten year anniversary of the Pulse Nightclub shooting. a full decade ago, i lost a friend and a coworker. i was lucky. i had friends that lost several people. today, please remember and fight for all those that have died to live the life they should have been free to. i'll always remember you, Cory.
This cycle of watching you continued for a while, you somehow never noticed him, which was surprising since you always notice cats. Speaking of, you had a lot of cat keychains on your bag, he didn’t notice that before. He started doing it less and less often, soul sickness and whatnot, maybe being out of commission could give him time to think about what excuse he could give for taking this long to acquire your soul.
Popping back in with you, since y’know, you’re kinda the main attraction around these parts, you were exercising today instead of your usual practice. Your trainer suggested it because of ‘not pulling your muscles and ripping something,’ whatever that means (joking). Working out is boring to you most of the time; you’re going through the same 5 pieces of equipment and blasting the same 15 songs in your ear to the point you’re hearing remnants of Moka saying “Who’s your bias? I’m your bias!” even when you’re actively listening to Fetty Wap blasting from the person next you’s headphones.
When you were done dissociating on the treadmill, you immediately grabbed your phone to send a small message to Mr. Silent and Mysterious.
> do you have a moment? > i'm not doing so hot atm 🫤
liking this color gradient more, the change is more visible now.
also enjoy the cliffhanger of dread and anticipation >:3
How a human has gone this long evading him is impressive to say the least, the human attempting to become all buddy-buddy with him is infuriating. 5012 doesn’t like his time being wasted like this, and he sure doesn’t like having to stoop to levels that could get him killed. He’s done waiting but he has to continue, you both promised each other that much; He won’t mind all the wasted time as long as you cooperate when that time is up and nothing else happens along the way.
Today 5012 decided he’d watch what you do, disguised of course, you wouldn’t suspect anything if it was just a cat peeking out of the bushes. You seemed to follow a tight schedule despite how much you play around when messaging him; Coffee, practice, breaktime (where you send him the worst videos known to man), more practice, and then you go home and make food.
He continued this routine of following you and the schedule stayed the exact same, rinse and repeat, day in and day out. No wonder you latched onto annoying him, this would be boring to any human.
Bit of a shorter chapter just because I need to finish this soon and also figure out the pacing :p. Also how y’all feeling about the new dividers (and the gradient text, should the end be a darker red)? The other ones are buried in my ipad’s photos and Tumblr apparently hates when I scroll too far into my photos and glitches out.
andulkaphoto
snowghoul
izzy806
blakekathryn
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