Doing an introduction post because I didn't before
Hi! I'm usually known as Sky Cas (Sky Casino Regular - AO3 username of mine). I decided to make a Tumblr acc because I have free will (as Nikolai would say), and because of easier interaction with BSD fandom.
The most important thing about me is that I write fanfiction, specifically Bungou Stray Dogs fanfiction. What's also an important information is that I have a co-writer with who I write those fics with, so I'm not entirely responsible for plot, but I am for most of the writing!
This blog will be focusing on BSD and fanfics, so here is my AO3 account!
Post is a bit longer but it's gonna be pinned so I want to put everything about me/this blog in one post!
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DNI
Since I do write E rated stuff, sometimes M rated, my posts will also be of that nature. I don't feel comfortable interacting with people younger than 17, so please keep that in mind.
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Favorite characters
Sigma
Nikolai
Fyodor
Shibusawa
Bonus: most "hated" character in my case is Dazai. Somehow, he always ends up being the bad guy in our fics.
Favorite ships
Fyosiglai
Siglai | Fyolai | Fyosig
Fyoshibu
Fyozai
Sigzai
I mostly write Fyosiglai or individual ships of theirs. I adore Fyoshibhu too, especially when it's one-sided.
Bonus: I don't like SKK nor do I intend writing about them (I do have one work, though).
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What I write
Mostly smut, sometimes with plot, sometimes just shameless one without plot. Depends on the day and the fic. Sometimes angst because I love hurting people and myself with my words :) And sometimes fluff, but that turns into smut real quick. Overall, I am mostly focused on ships.
I have my fair share of AU fanfics, so most of them aren't set in canon universe.
I do tend to start something new and I do kind of push back some fics that I'm working on, but I do try to post updates to most at least once a month!
Fics of mine (ours)
Some of them, my favorite ones. If you want to see all of them, feel free to check my AO3
DOA game nights - fic with most kudos, smut with undertones of plot (the plot will come later on, though). Of course it's Fyosiglai :)
A new Angel of the Decay - sadly not everyone's cup of tea, but me and my co-writer adore this family drama we came up with, and our dear Theo (Fyosiglai's kiddo)
Series "Diary of Angels"
A whole AU focused on Fyosiglai; from Fyolai meeting in high school, them being in college, finding Sigma, becoming fwb, and later lovers, then a married couple with their dear Theo. Currently has around 160k words!
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Messages/questions/requests
I am more than happy to interact with BSD fans and people with same intrests, the same with people who read my works, so don't hesitate to contact me, talk to me via messages, or ask questions at that ask thingy!
I don't usually do any fic requests (because my ass can't write what it doesn't want to sometimes) but right now, I feel motivated, so you can request something that's inside my field of writing (the characters and ships I mentioned)!
I'm more than happy to talk about most topics, prompts, headcanons, and all that.
Posts
Right now, I'm posting things from my Kinktober, and I will be promoting my works here. But I will also post my random thoughts and things that are too short for AO3 (or are just not "worthy" publishing there).
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I think that's all? I hope I didn't leave anything out that's important.
So bye bye!
I did leave something out, actually!!
I cosplay! And since this blog is mostly BSD, I'll post my BSD cosplays here and there :3
I'm so glad BSD fandom got selfcest revolution, because I adore it. I never had any excuse or ideas to write it, so seeing the opportunity, I might post Angelzai x Chuuya x Devilzai fic when I edit it. If I decide it's worthy of AO3 lmao
You'll probably be seeing me tomorrow or overmorrow with it😝
While his two partners are home, locked in chastity cages, Fyodor is on the cruise with the intention to assassinate a man himself, holding the keys for said cages. It just so happened that the certain individual, called Osamu Dazai, had the same man as the target.
Fyodor expected them to be against each other, but Dazai had other plans.
"I debated if we should play Russian roulette, since the results would be undoubtedly clear," Fyodor said back as he ran his finger along the revolver. "However, I quite like chess."
"Each time an important piece falls," Fyodor continued, let the silence linger for a bit, then said in a lower tone, with a slight smile on his face, "We pull the trigger."
"On ourselves?" Dazai asked instantly, finding Fyodor's gaze and locking his own on it.
"No," Fyodor simply stated, "On each other." Where would the fun in putting the gun to his head be? He'd rather add the tension of not knowing when the other would shoot than knowing and expecting it.
Something different from the Game Nights you're used to, but I wouldn't say unwelcome. I really wanted to write Fyozai, so I added it into the whole plot, and of course, couldn't forget the premise of the fic; it has smut, don't worry.
It's just a game night that Fyodor's playing with someone else instead of his partners. Give it a read if you're interested! I might yap more about this chapter later on
HAPPY PRIDE MONTH! I'd love to say I have written something but unfortunately I haven't had time to sit and write properly past month :(
There's just so much going on right now. It's mostly positive, so I can't complain. I did get a little poem about myself from someone; I didn't know it's that honoring, so it pleasantly surprised me, hihi
The only thing I wish for is more time, but then again, girl's gotta get that bag to enjoy her vacation soon so what can you do! And also pass the semester...
I'm really gonna try and give it my all to sit and write because I miss my Fyosiglai a lot </3
sigh… idek what to reply because we clearly won’t come to an agreement but i’ll still try. saying fyodor didn’t see it as rape but all i remember from the fic is how fyodor was protesting and struggling against nikolai who drugged him and couldn’t even hear fyodor’s inner monologue about how he "wanted" it or whatever. he literally coerced fyodor into having sex. that’s textbook definition of rape. not even about the fic, please don’t call it """dub con""".
Like I said, reading between the lines, or rather actual lines, can tell you why this fic can't be tagged as rape. In real life, yeah, this would be a really fucked situation. However in fiction, people can do whatever, and on AO3, can write whatever if they tag it properly.
Nikolai even gave Fyodor a chance to decline and say no, yet Fyodor didn't. It's pretty clear in the text.
'Creator chose not to use archive warnings' + 'dubious consent'
The whole point of not giving it a warning of 'Rape/noncon' is because this isn't downright rape, but it isn't sunshine and rainbows either. I am chosing not to give it a warning, but that doesn't mean some can't apply; I elaborated that in additional tags. Personally, I don't think it's rape (mostly because I know this AUs Fyolai dynamic and know they treat it like a game later on), so for me and others who think the same, warnings don't apply. You do, and you were warned that some could apply.
It's tagged properly. There's nothing more that I can do about it. This whole thing was supposed to be you giving me a critique about how I don't treat this as serious as Fyodor's mistakes in my fics, as far as I'm aware. It was supposed to be about my writing, not about wrong tags or something else. I don't even want criticism, I never asked for any. And I didn't even comment on that 'RapistNikolai' guest's name? I don't care what the guest's name is, lmao.
Matter of fact, I even admitted I liked dub-con and the blur of boundaries when it comes to my fics.
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I don't want to go into what's rape and what not in real life because that's a different story. If I were to, I could find some situations in which I was in that I don't find were rape, yet people could tell me 'you were raped' when they hear them.
Yet we are not talking about real life, but about fiction. No one's truly hurt. That being said, you chose to read it yourself. You have every right to think whatever of it, but you can't say that it's not tagged accordingly and clearly.
I'm done with this debate. I really don't care about my fics being morally right. Next time you see this combination of tags, be warned that you may not like the fic.
i meant "submit to carnality, if not to me". excuse me if i’m wrong but i assumed it was apart of the "new angel" au
Thank you for elaborating! It is a part of Diary of Angels, however 'Submit to carnality, if not to me' takes place when they're in college, and 'A new Angel of the Decay' when they're in their thirties.
The first tag of that fic is 'dubious consent,' which should make people expect someone asking themselves whether something was 100% consentual or not. There is also an aphrodisiac tag, third one, that tells you why the fic is dub-con.
Submit to carnality, if not to me
I don't know if you read any of my other fics of them in college, but they do be fucking around with boundaries. Fyodor also tops Nikolai while Nikolai is drugged in 'Cradled and caged' fic of mine. Even in DOA Game nights there is dub-con. I'm not hiding that.
Cradled and caged
Personally, I love playing with dub-con because it's fun in fiction, and sometimes relevant to the plot (in this specific one, Nikolai giving Fyodor an aphrodisiac made them start sleeping together, which was a plot hole in the series that we had).
Fyodor doesn't view this as rape; therefore it isn't. That's why Nikolai isn't held accountable, because from Fyodor's POV, there is no real damage. Reading between the lines, you could notice Fyodor himself was interested in Nikolai's skills and that he does find him attractive. Drug was just a push. He does regret it in a way, but he did consent, even if influenced by a sex drug; so, dub-con.
The consequences Nikolai will be facing will be of the same kind; Fyodor will pay him back for it, sexually. It's just a game they play. They're both fucked. They both do questionable things. If Fyodor were to really defy Nikolai, I'm sure he'd back off. And if Fyodor really viewed this as rape, that would be stated. He just regrets giving in into own carnality later on, not because of sex itself, but more because his pride and ego got hurt because he let himself be a bottom (lmao).
Also, the fic 'Breaking the record' is unfinished at the moment, but, in the next chapters, Sigma will comment on how he feels like Nikolai only cares about sex, which will lead them to talk it through and it will make Nikolai realise he's downright too much sometimes. But that's not as relevant to this; it's just me explaining that Nikolai's hypersexuality/lust will be adressed at some point.
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I didn't feel the need to make this a big deal/this all as serious in these fics as in real life because most of these fics are just shameless smut where I explore different dynamics and situations. I can admit Nikolai is sick in the head for drugging Fyodor, but hey, with fiction you can do anything you please.
However, 'A new Angel of the Decay' is not smut centric, but family and angst centric, where I want to explore things in a different light. Personally, I even relate to Fyodor in some way, so I don't even think he's a true villain. But half of the fic is written from Nikolai's perspective, and Nikolai himself does hate Fyodor for things he did, because he is bothered by them on a higher level.
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All that being said, I get your point, I understand where you're coming from, but it is my personal choice how I want characters in my fics to react; in this case, neither Fyodor was feeling like he was raped in this fic, nor did Nikolai feel raped in one where Fyodor fucked him while he was almost unconcious. It's not adressed because they themselves don't think it should be.
It goes without saying that I don't support any of this in real life, and that I would never tell any victim of rape that they are lying for one reason or another or that their emotions aren't valid. It was never my intention to make anyone uncomfortable; that's why my fics are tagged properly so that people could avoid them (or find them, of course).
I hope I explained this alright! You can take this how you want, and if you decide you're unsatisfied with my explanation, that's perfectly alright. Not everyone needs to like everything I write (plot wise, smut wise, character wise, etc.)
not agreeing with anons accusing you of bad stuff but I have a criticism. I’m not sure how to feel about Fyodor being portrayed as the more bad guy in your AU diary of angels considering Nikolai literally raped him but this never ever gets acknowledged. don’t deny the rape please it would be very disheartening. Nikolai keep abusing his victim, both verbally and physically is rather a bad look so I can’t even be surprised people see him in that way. I hope you’ll take my words into consideration. I’m not saying you should retcon this part I just wish you’d acknowledge this in the fic. I like reading your fics but I just can’t be ok with Nikolai not being held accountable for what he did, not even an acknowledgement
I have an answer planned but I'm at work right now and can't. I would also like to know which exact fics you are referring to until I get home. Knowing that, I can answer properly so that my answer wouldn't just be me guessing
nah what is w u getting sm hate 😭😭 like why is there some1 commenting on chap 10 on doa game nights telling u 2 quit w THAT type of quest name. idec abt the name ngl it's just so weird of them 2 even bother writing that like esp as a quest... like if ur gonna hate on someone don't be a pussy do it w an actual account bruh
Honestly I'm not as bothered, especially not when people just hate to hate, without giving/having any (valid) reasons.
Because, my brother in Christ, this is a 94k word long fic? The fuck are you staying here for. You had PLENTY of time to leave🧍♀️
Not to mention, it's smut, they're silly in that fic most of the time, of course they'll have cheezy things to say (looking at you, Nikolai).
People don't treat fics/art/people that contribut to the fandom by own choice like they used to (with respect) because many don't want to listen "don't like, don't read" and/or apply it to art and other things. Which is insane, especially on a site like AO3 that had a tagging system for this reason.
But oh well, if my ex hating my passion for writing fics for a year straight didn't make me stop, I don't think anything will. I'm not sure if people are aware how much I love writing, or how much I don't care about my fics being morally right/close to canon.
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I'd also like to use this post to let you know that I see your requests and that I will get to them when I find time since I'm busy with college and my Nikolai cosplay for next con😝 I'm sorry that it takes so long!
"Perhaps I will be able to let it go if you consider agreeing you two have proved my point: you are not able to control yourself without me."
"Well, you didn't exactly say that was the test," Nikolai nitpicked it.
"So, hypothetically speaking, if we did make a deal, you would not have done it?" Fyodor asked, arguing back.
"You know I always get the bet, or at least get away with it," Nikolai smiled his way. "It's not on me you two can't figure out my way of cheating before I get my reward."
"Alright, I will set the proper test then," Fyodor said and leaned his head onto his open palm. "I bet you two could not last a week without fucking with each other or losing your mind. If you do, I will let you command me for a whole day, and if you don't, as a punishment, I will be commanding you both for a night."
OR:
Plot related chapter in which Fyodor and Nikolai involve Sigma in a mission for once; it takes a turn of Fyolai agruing about who Sigma likes more, which bleeds into Siglai semi-public sex and them taking the bet Fyodor had proposed, unaware that they will end up in a rather unfortunate situation (locked in chastity cages)
Art of their mission outfits made by me even if I found outfits on Pinterest and I don't know how to draw faces so they look uncany, but let me be, I'm still learning lmao. It would be a shame for it to just sit in my gallery.
I yapp about every chapter, so why not about this one too?
I can't believe this fic is doing this well. It's on 94k words now, which is quite a lot, and it has around 750 kudos, which is also A LOT. I gotta thank you all because I never expected this much support for the idea I got one sunny afternoon on a random Thursday. And to think it's a rare-pair, a poly ship even? Thank you so much omg.
Anyway, I can't wait to release Fyodor's chapter on a cruise, because he definetly will enjoy that time, in a rather unexpected way with rather unexpected someone. But that's for another time.
About the mission
Honestly, this chapter was written from Sigma's perspective because I can't stand mission details and all that practical stuff. Sigma doesn't need to know it all, so I don't have to explain if it's from his POV lmao. Basically, the whole thing is that they need to find a guy and kill the guy, which we made up. We could go with Ace, but then that would mean I need to look over his character, and I didn't feel like doing so. it wouldn't fit the plot. But enough about that, there are many other things to talk about.
"Is this purely sexual to you?" Fyodor raised his eyebrows.
...
"But you still said you 'might as well find someone since I won't decide.' I'm not deciding regardless, but what you apparently said doesn't go with what I heard," Sigma mumbled back.
"Don't we all say things in the heat of the moment?" Nikolai raised his voice, "It was meant to make you forced to choose, God damn it."
Even if it doesn't seem that way right now, Fyodor and Nikolai are in the state of minor miscommunication that will lead to some problems later. Nikolai's devoted to their dynamic, yet is speaking as if opposite in front of Fyodor, which will have some effect on the story later. God, I can't with that.
But yeah, it's basically written all over the last chapters that Nikolai doesn't want any more meaningless hookups with any more meaningless people since he has Sigma and Fyodor at all times. But, the turn of events is always leading to him telling Sigma this, yet not Fyodor.
Perhaps the reason is because he knows Sigma's in for commitment, and Fyodor isn't, or rather he thinks he isn't. God knows what Fyodor's thoughts actually are. He's the kind to be devoted out of practice, but emotinally? That's a bit more complicated.
"I'd rather lose both than just one of you." ... "I wouldn't. The same goes the other way, though; I wouldn't crawl to Fyodor either if you were to leave."
I love, so dearly love Sigma's dedication to them both. He got so used to them all being together that he can't even imagine one of them not being around. People would think Sigma would settle for one, but he's so not the type. He'd rather not feel like home (lose both), then fell like something (one of them) is missing.
"You two could figure it out without me too. And Fyodor and I could figure it out without you. As much as that's hard to hear, it's the truth. Just that, if any of us separated into two, no one would be completely satisfied."
Because, let's be real, if one of them were to leave, both Sigma and another would be broken to pieces, even if they wouldn't want to admit it. It would fuck them up. The three are just a trouple that would never work sepertely in the long run.
Sigma's the only one aware of that, or the only one that 100% understands how their dynamic works.
"Damn, I'll get head?" Nikolai laughed but whined a moment after, perhaps because Fyodor moved away.
"Nope," Fyodor popped his 'p', "You will, however, fall for the same trick once again."
If Sigma had to describe what he heard next, he'd just say it was absolute horror. After a metallic click of some kind of a mechanism, Nikolai started cussing out everything that could be cussed out.
My God, how I love this side of Nikolai. He can endure so much but he fears a cock cage like nothing else. Really, the only punishment that's actually a punishment from which he doesn't get pleasure is a cock cage. Even edging brings some satisfaction, so he can deal with that. But cock age? Hell no.
Sigma, on the other hand, just heard about it, so he doesn't fear them out of experience; he just knows it's awful because Nikolai told him so. He'd rather go blind into it, but oh well, he can't do anything about it now, can he?
Sigma can swear the only reason why he's a drama queen about it is because it restricts the possibility of fucking something or someone. If they were left alone without these on, surely Nikolai would survive without sex. With them on, however, the possibility of doing so was zero, which made Nikolai want it more.
And Sigma's damn right. Even in smut fics, Nikolai wants and longs from freedom, in one way or another. It's not about it restricting him from sex physically, but emotionally.
Some people say that, when they are starting their journey of stopping smoking, it's way more effective for them to have a pack than not to have one at all times. That way, they are actively choosing not to smoke, instead of being forbidden physically, which somehow makes it easier and makes them feel like they are in control.
I think the same applies to Nikolai and cock cages. With it on, he can't do anything, which makes him want to at least be able to do something, not exactly do it. With it off, he can do whatever he wants since there is no literal reminder that he's to keep it in his pants at all times; therefore is more likely to control himself.
So yeah, that would be all, I think? There's probably more that I can say, but I'll leave it at this!
It gen feels like anon is trying their hardest to provoke you… I’d recommend ignoring them bc they’re not gonna listen anyway😭 please don’t let that ignorant mf discourage you, we love your fics and you didn’t do anything wrong🫂
Thank youu!! I'm really all for people letting me know if my work somehow offends anyone, and I'd gladly explain why I wrote what I did and fix my mistakes if there are any, but I really can't figure out what exactly is there to fix about this lol.
Don't worry though, for me to feel discouraged, I don't even know what needs to happen. Thank u, love u!
Fyodor's voice was soft, quiet, filled with many, many unsaid words, and even more unshown emotions that built up over the past God knows how many years. Nikolai couldn't know what possessed him to use an old nickname he was used to hearing before; he just knew that his body reacted regardless of his mind telling him to keep indifferent. A shiver couldn't be controlled in any way and couldn't be masked either.
Heart almost got him to say it back, to use 'Fedya' after many years, yet head couldn't allow it, "Fyodor."
or: Nikolai's perspective of Fyodor's 'death'
And since I'm yapping about every chapter, I will about this one too, so if you wish, do come back and read more if you want some explanations and a yapperfest!
Fyodor's ability
Yea, we planned this so far ahead even before Fyodor's ability was uncovered that we built up a plot that focused on our 'guess' of his ability (we just made it fit). It's somewhat close to canon, and somewhat also so far away, but we really don't want to change it to fit his canon ability for many different reasons. So, we just decided to give this man nine lives, and go with it, like he's a damn cat.
When he killed himself, it was out of pure guilt, which is a telling thing. I waited for so long to finally deliver chapter 9 so that all of you could see that Fyodor's isn't just cold hearted because he wants to be, but because of something deeper.
What is also telling is that Nikolai was scared shitless when he first saw him dead; he does care, even if he doesn't want to. If Fyodor truly ended up dead, he'd deffinetly be in big distress. Even now, when he knows Fyodor isn't truly dead, he knows damn well that the reason he committed suicide isn't dumb; he knows that Fyodor's guilt built up so much that he couldn't take it. However, as Nikolai mentioned in one of the lines, he can't and won't forget what Fyodor did, in contrast to Sigma, who would if he was in his place.
That's why he didn't want to tell him and probably never will. They'd be back at zero.
Theo
I'm so sorry you had to see this Theo... it's just for the plot, and well, your ability...
Thanks to my ex, we changed the original ability that Theo would have to something else (next chapter will be about it) that fits way better into the plot. First draft of this chapter didn't have Theo seeing a single thing, but after figuring out the ability to give him and finally deciding to stick with it, we needed a way to reveal it, or at least start a talk about it, so we used this chapter to do so.
Prove me wrong, but I don't think it's canon that abilities activate because of trauma? However, we went with that, and mixed it with heredity. In other words; Theo would have an ability even without this since his parents are gifted, just that the reveal wouldn't be as good as it will be now.
'End of conflicts'
After Nikolai finally accepted that Fyodor does care, but won't change, he decided not to push his buttons as much as before. You'll see that, from now on, hatred won't be voiced; they simply agreed to live together for Sigma's, casino's and The Decay's sake. However, this doesn't mean that they'll be acting like loving husbands...
'Is there anything else you want to tell me?'
Hoping that he'd at least be guided in some way, at least get a glimpse into Fyodor's soul, he waited. With each moment, hope that Fyodor would let him see what's under all the masks grew. Hope that at least something good would come out of this situation grew even if he knew he was hoping for nothing.
The most hurtful thing in this chapter was that Nikolai waited for Fyodor to talk, and Fyodor waited for Nikolai to ask. Yet neither did so.
If one of them spoke up... perhaps they'd even be on the right track of fixing it all. But we don't deserve that, we can't have that. And that hurts so damn much.
I can't wait to start writing the next chapter. I might start right now, in fact. But yeah, if you read all of this, I hope you liked the yapperfest! Until the next chapter :)
"I made Sigma trans at first because I literally did want more options for smut in DOA game nights" "keep Sigma as male because I liked him that way" man how do you manage to sound both transphobic and misogynistic at the same time. i don’t know why you thought admitting your transphobia would be a good explanation, but straight up admitting you wrote trans Sigma just for the sake of him being AFAB under the guise of a trans headcanon is not a good look at all. (but you took interest in the headcanon and "developed" it further so it cancels out your transphobia right?🥺)
Still no mention of what fics you are talking about exactly? You really love making me keep guessing.
I'll say one more thing then leave you to think of me however you'd like.
Sigma was cis when I first wrote the first chapter. After I met my friend, we talked about Game nights and she asked how they met. It led to expanding the universe, and we agreed that Sigma's character, that's already based on "not feeling like he belongs," (that's why I even headcanoned him as trans a year before even writing and posting anything) would be better off trans, because it would fit in smut and plot when we decide to write it (as we did). Half of Sigma's personality would be gone if I stuck to cis woman/man Sigma, and I think you would be aware of that if you read my series.
I'm really curious to know whether you're my reader or just someone who came across one of my fics, glazed over my tags, and decided to call me transphobic. I'm sure you won't specify, but I'm gonna tell you I never got any comment of this kind from anyone, and especially not from readers who follow my series and works.
I can see you aren't willing to even consider what I said. I have never once in my life thought about any trans person with hate because of their gender identity, and I never thought about trans people as objects; especially not in real life. Sigma, however, is a character, not my child. If I want to, I can make anyone have two cocks, an ass and two pussies for smut purposes, because it's fiction. I did choose to embrace Sigma being trans properly (or at least I would hope I did), which you could see in The Angel's bet.
You can say whatever you want, but I won't be sorry for something I did not do, which is transphobia. I'm trying my best to portrait my characters as best as possible, especially since series isn't just about smut (hasn't been for a long time). I know about gender dysphoria, I have had it before, sometimes even now. And even though I'm not trans, I have researched about trans people.
You can stay offended, but I won't indulge in this conversation anymore since I don't think I can change your opinion no matter what I say. I have never recieved this type of comment (beside the one I have posted already, which focuses on Nikolai's vision of Sigma, not mine). I was even proven that my writing isn't transphobic by trans people who read my works.
Once again, I'm a writer, and I write what I want for people who read my works because they like them. If you don't like what I write, simply do not read.
And if you have been my reader for a long time but gained this mindset only after seeing that one take on Twitter... then you yourself haven't even thought about it, just embraced a Twitter take for the sake of it
your fetishization of trans people is disguising and i hope you know it’s obvious to anyone that you headcanon Sigma as trans only for his genitals, especially considering how you just straight up genderbent him in one of your fics without even bothering making him trans, just so he could have a vagina (˙ᵕ˙)
Hey! So... yeah, I made Sigma trans at first because I literally did want more options for smut in DOA game nights; to explore more smut, since before series started, this was only meant to be smut. And yes, I also manipulated the plot so that Sigma was on birth control, because, like I said, I wanted to explore smut more (but keep Sigma as male because I liked him that way).
First chapter was, indeed, cis Sigma before I changed my mind and decided to write him as trans. From there, story progressed. And after doing so, I feel like I portrayed his character pretty good. I don't know where you found offense, since I meant none of it if I accidentally did offend anyone. Matter of fact, someone did point out one of Nikolai's comments wasn't a compliment but was offensive (attached).
I don't know which fic you're referring to, but if it's any that's out of my series, for example A Prince, a Knight and a Princess in between, I hate to break it to you, but that's a whole other AU and has nothing to do with trans Sigma or me fetishizing trans people/wanting pussy lol. I didn't make him trans because I want Nikolai and Fyodor to seem straight at first, and well, because I simply wanted/needed cis woman Sigma for the plot I'm writing.
I'm not gonna keep guessing (but if you specify, I'd gladly explain), and I'm just gonna tell you that yes, you're right, I wanted Sigma trans for smut at first, then later decided to explore that topic way deeper than the surface, which I feel like I did well in Diary of Angels. After said series was expanded, Sigma wasn't just a smut puppet anymore, and I gave it my all to focus on him being trans, his feelings and boundaries (especially in The Angel's bet).
I'm always open to critics about my writing of trans characters. Therefore, if there's anything that can be offensive in my writing (if we don't count the attached comment since I feel like I explained it pretty good already), do say so. I want to write as respectfully as possible, and I'm all in for people to tell me if I'm doing something wrong.
But, at the same time, having Sigma trans in one fic and cis man/woman in others, is just a personal choice that I'm making for a reason. I'm simply playing with characters and exploring different dynamics, especially smut ones; how I am supposed to do as a writer.
A new Angel of the Decay just gained another chapter, meaning that we are one step closer to the ending that is slowly approaching. But, lucky our readers are, because that means... somewhat of a happy ending :)
Summary:
"We really don't have to. I promise we won't be mad at you," Sigma said back regardless, not taking Fyodor's words as something to just shrug at and continue.
"Please take my word for it, dear. I would love to build a family."
"You're really gonna let me have this?" Nikolai asked with the biggest smile Fyodor ever saw him have, then nodded his way.
"I have made my decision, and I am certain of it."
u should write a siglaizai onceshot omg.... smut defo.... 🤫🤫🤫🦄🦄
The fact that I never even thought about this ship, but when I started writing, it ended up being long enough for AO3...
I hope it's alright with you that I put them in modern era (and that Sigma is trans), because I really needed an excuse, and a ship, to write what I had in mind for quite some time now.
Then again, the thought of this ship in prison arc is also exciting, just that they would absolutely destroy and annoy Sigma in cannon setting. I might write that too, one sunny day. But until then, here ya go:
Two bad bitches, at the same damn time
Siglaizai smut / modern era / trans Sigma
Dazai as a 'third' to Siglai
Summary:
That is how he found himself here, standing at the edge of the bed where two of the hottest people he has ever matched with on Tinder are staring at him after they were tongues deep into each other's mouths.
"All talk, no walk?" Nikolai looked at him and tilted his head. "Over the messages, you sounded like you were pretty hungry for us."
"Damn right I am," Dazai answered, breathlessly. "I can't decide who to kiss first, though." Partly a lie, partly a truth.
"Good thing that we got all night," Sigma smiled at him and offered his hand.
🔞 Fyolai smut / dubious consent / sex drugs / college
❖ top Nikolai & bottom Fyodor
Summary
“Right, that’s why I’m letting you take care of it yourself,” Nikolai smiled, crossed his arms as if saying he won’t be leaving no matter what, and locked eyes on Fyodor’s bulge. “I never said I’ll walk out of the room now, did I?”
So… that was his plan? For him to touch himself as he watches? Just what was he supposed to do at this very moment?
He’s horny as fuck, but masturbating in front of Nikolai’s eyes is out of the question. At this point, he might as well let Nikolai do what he pleases and get him off his way than have him be humiliated and unable to properly finish because of the raging embarrassment. He weighed his options, then settled for the second one and mumbled, “Take care of it before I change my mind.”
or: Fyodor's and Nikolai's first time
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───
Since I've never written how college arc of Fyolai's friends-with-benefits era started, I figured I should write their first time. I had it in my drafts for a year now, half-done, and I had some free time so I wrote the rest!
We all know Nikolai's a bit of a horny freak in this series. Unfortunately, it has been years since he tried seducing Fyodor, and he was getting impatient, so his ass decided that the best solution would be to drug Fyodor with a sex drug and get some kind of consent, then blow his brains out. That's exactly what he did.
Truth be told, not even Fyodor knows if this was consentual or not. On one hand, he did tell Nikolai to do what he wanted and was horny, on the other, if he was in his right mind, he would push him away.
At the end it's mentioned that he doesn't plan on sleeping with Nikolai again, but we all know that's not true. Eventually, they ended up fucking left and right, and Fyodor figured he doesn't mind and quite likes the feeling (but that's the part for which other of our fics are for).
If you like some shameless smut, and pathetic bottom Fyodor, do give it a read!
Oh, and I tried making a cover but I didn't have much time so it ended up looking like a sketch, but at least there's something, right?
