slide ███████

indi rp blog based off of Jesse Faden from Remedy's game Control

[chopsaws-deactivated344321]

might fuck around and break into area 51

[slidethirtysix]

After all the shit Jesse dealt with, in regards to The Hiss, Dylan, and unearthing/reliving their trauma, I think it's safe to say that she took a minute to herself when it was all said and done to have a really good cry.

[angrywhistler]

ania swiatlowska

[redactedshapes]

late night shift (date)

[slidethirtysix]

𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬. @demcnsinmymind sent;; " out of all the places I could be, why would I want to be here with you?"

Jesse had seen a good handful of scary movies. When she began to move around, spending evenings in ratty hotels, she would click around until something caught her eye. Poltergeist had been a good one. But, just like everything, nothing can truly prepare you for the real thing.

Collingwood… They didn’t have much to go on. A report had been filed back in 2003 but had no further leads.  Maybe most of the pages got lost during the lockdown. The hospital carried an ominous loom. Some dark history that left its mark. Stained into every tile and floorboard. The FBC needed more information about this place—along with Lance Preston. He’s briefly mentioned on the censored pages, along with a small group of people, who suddenly went missing. Only for him to appear thirteen years later.

Now, this was a ghost story. This was the real thing.

But you can’t confidently say ‘This house is clean’ and be done with it. In the real world, it isn’t that easy. You don’t always come out in one piece, and, if Lance’s medical history had any truth, Jesse doubts he did.

“I mean, you’re pretty safe here.” Faden gives a quick, small smile closing the door behind herself, excusing the previous interviewer. Even before she entered the room, Polaris had flared up. Signals of empathy, but also caution, tickle the front of her mind. She’s quick to switch places with the previous coworker—something is telling her that maybe she should take this one. Jesse casually approaches the table, taking a seat across from Lance. The Service Weapon is holstered to her hip, as usual. She feels safe but not fully confident about what she’s feeling. What Polaris is trying to tell her. “Plus, this is the capital of weird shit. If you tell me, ‘Hey, I had a burger with bigfoot’ I would be jealous.” Maybe that wasn’t the best opener, but, hey, she tried. The guy wasn't in trouble with the bureau or anything. Hopefully, she’s somewhat convincing. May as well start off on a lighter note before they dive into something heavier, anyway. Did they even have a file on Sasquatch? She’ll have to dig—that would be a great lunch read.

Jesse clears her throat lightly and settles into her seat. Her smile is a bit less playful now.

“Which is kind of why you’re here. We need to talk.”

[screenshotsofdespair]

[wearepaladin]

[sch-uwu-lchen]

[slidethirtysix]

me being a fool thinking "jesse is alright" until i start replaying control and get hit with a wave of "i love this woman so much, she is so chill while also being a bit of a clown but also girlbossing her way around the fbc."

[slidethirtysix]

@miswaken continued from : [ ██████ ]

Just like that, all the frustration deflated into exhaustion, right before her eyes, as Alice’s demeanor changed. It’s too familiar. One of the core foundations of her world had been shattered and Jesse can’t blame her for being tired. She hopes that Alice gets the answers she needs at the end of this road. One, that hopefully, lets her reunite with her other half.

“We might’ve—I might’ve—come across some news, recently. I meant to contact you sooner, but we had a pretty intense clean-up situation here.”

How she came about the information was a different discussion. The Hiss. The Dark Presence. Did one set off the other? The Hiss brought her here to Dylan for her answers--her closure. But she remembers holding the typewritten page. Its ink faded on wrinkled paper. The chanting hymn from the chorus of elevated men and women held a fixed around the Oldest House. The aged ink held those same words. It all could be a coincidence. It happens. But, from her experiences, nothing is just a coincidence anymore.

Polaris chimes.

One step at a time, Faden.

“We've had a team monitoring Bright Falls. I'm not too sure if those guys before told you or not.” Jesse momentarily pauses. This would be good news for Alice, but there is guilt at being the one to say it. There was only a faint web that held them to, well, wherever he currently was. They hadn't found Wake. They don't have him for her. Jesse wishes she did. “Some activity has started happening there—at Cauldron Lake.”

Bright Falls had spiraled. From what she understood, the place was always under an influence. There had been a long silence up until the Wakes. Their arrival pushed something over the edge, somehow. It was as if it had been waiting for them all along. It knew.

“Before that, we had something happen here. It sort of played a part in the whole mess we had."

“I think whatever happened here, at the bureau, was some kind of trigger. While we dealt with the outbreak, I felt something. It for sure didn't feel like... whatever that is.” Jesse gestures to the photograph of the looming figure on the desk. "I completely understand that this isn't my place, but, I don't think Alan is dead. I think he needs help."

[nightprompts]

&. 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

( dialogue  prompts  taken  from the script of  everything  everywhere  all  at  once  (2022),  directed  by  daniel  kwan  and  daniel  scheinert.  feel  free  to  edit  and  change  as  you  seem  fit. )

❛ you look really pretty right now. ❜

❛ stop changing the subject. ❜

❛ every day i fight, i fight for all of us. ❜

❛ what are you doing? what is wrong? ❜

❛ if i have to think about one more thing today, my head will explode. ❜

❛ you may be in grave danger. there is no time to explain.❜

❛ we can make our own way. please, come with me. ❜

❛ don't even talk to me about this because i won't remember.❜

❛ i am not your husband. at least not the one you know. i am another version of him from another life path, another universe. ❜

❛ i’m here because we need your help.❜

❛ sorry, very busy today. no time to help you– ❜

❛ all those years of searching have brought me here. to this universe. to you. ❜

❛ i’m here to tell you every rejection, every disappointment has led you here. to this moment. ❜

❛ i'm not ready to fight yet. ❜

❛ maybe we don't have a choice. ❜

❛ now, you can either come with me and live up to your ultimate potential, or lie here and live with the consequences. ❜

❛ i... want to lie here. ❜

❛ how often do people literally die laughing? ❜

❛ my husband won't even kill a spider. how are you the same person? ❜

❛ we are talking about infinity. if you can imagine it, somewhere out there, it exists. ❜

❛ how did i die? ❜

❛ i've seen you die a thousand ways. in a thousand worlds. in every single one, you were murdered. ❜

❛ what!? who wants me dead? ❜

❛ you’ve been feeling it too, haven’t you? something is off. your clothes never wear as well the next day, your hair never falls in quite the same way, even your coffee tastes... wrong. ❜

❛ maybe we would have been better off if we had never gotten married. ❜

❛ i never said that. ❜

❛ you didn’t have to. it’s the way you look at me. ❜

❛ can’t you see it? how wonderful it would be if you came with me? ❜

❛ i saw my life without you. i wish you could have seen it. it was beautiful. ❜

❛ shhh, you're not thinking straight. ❜

❛ what is worse than death? ❜

❛ i saw your face on a billboard and — this is silly — i wondered if you remembered me... ❜

❛ is it that i can’t be here, or that i’m not allowed to be here? ❜

❛ there is no good, there is no evil. there is only “goovil”. ❜

❛ if you can imagine it, you have fucked it. ❜

❛ do not be so closed minded that you blind yourself from the truth! ❜

❛ don’t make me fight you. i am really really good. ❜

❛ you're capable of anything because you're so bad at everything. ❜

❛ you can't remember anything because your bodies were under the control of other universes. ❜

❛ you were like puppets. and you could do things you normally can't do. you were like, what's that movie... raccaccoonie? ❜

❛ how can you defeat her in every universe, if you can't even kill her in one? ❜

❛ the sacrifices necessary to win this war... i know all too well. ❜

❛ i cannot lose another loved one to the darkness. ❜

❛ i know you have feelings. feelings that make you so sad. that make you just want to give up. that is not your fault. ❜

❛ i'll see you again soon, somewhere out there in all that noise. ❜

❛ just think happy thoughts. ❜

❛ you okay? caught you staring off into space again. ❜

❛ i'm the one you've been looking for. ❜

❛ i’m the one who will defeat you. ❜

❛ you’re finally free, like me. ❜

❛ you don't have to choose anymore. between loving me or hating me. you can do both at the same time. ❜

❛ before, you were asking about "our daughter". it's crazy, but it really got me thinking. what if you had come with me all of those years ago? ❜

❛ all of this time, i wasn't looking for someone who could defeat me. i was looking for someone who could see what i see, feel what i feel... ❜

❛ oh, good, you're here too. ❜

❛ i'm sorry about ruining everything, i– ❜

❛ we're all stupid. small stupid little humans. it's like our whole deal. ❜

❛ everything is going to be okay. ❜

❛ you think i’m weak don’t you? ❜

❛ when we first fell in love all of those years ago, your father would say i was too sweet for my own good. maybe he was right. ❜

❛ please! can we just stop fighting! ❜

❛ you tell me that it's a cruel world and we're all just running around in circles. i know that. i've been on this earth just as many days as you. ❜

❛ the only thing i do know is we have to be kind. be kind. especially, when we don't know what's going on. ❜

❛ i know you go through life with your fists held tight. you see yourself as a fighter. well, i see myself as one too. this is how i fight. ❜

❛ in another life, i would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you. ❜

❛ you know what i say? cold, hysterical, unlovable bitches like us make the world go round. ❜

❛ you aren’t unlovable. there is always something to love. ❜

❛ even in a stupid, stupid universe where we have hot dogs for fingers, we’d all be very good with our feet! ❜

❛ in a universe where we both agree that no one could love you, if we look hard enough, something will prove us wrong. ❜

❛ we are all useless alone. so its good you're not alone. ❜

❛ maybe you win in this universe. but in another, i beat you. or we tie. or we eat crepes. ❜

❛ i don't want to hurt anymore. and for some reason when i'm with you, it hurts both of us. ❜

❛ out of all of the places i could be, why would i want to be here with you? ❜

❛ i still want to be here with you. i will always want to be here with you. ❜

❛ i will cherish these few specks of time. ❜

[slidethirtysix]

❝ Fair warning: This is going to be ... weirder than usual.❞

[albrakia]

[slidethirtysix]

▼ miswaken​:

@slidethirtysix​ asked: ❛ You can either waste time worrying about a death that might not come or concentrate on what’s left to you. ❜ ~from Jesse

annihilation starters || accepting 

      She honestly never expected to be here again.

      Not that she’s been here, exactly. Not in this office. But the building – it’s familiar like a dream is, recollection tinged with haze, something tangible in the moment that slips through your fingers like smoke the instant you stop concentrating on it. That could be because of everything else that had been occupying her mind the last time. Specifics of the address, the building itself, the layout of the hallways and offices she’d been ushered through and past lost amidst the more pressing matters that had claimed her attention then. Or maybe it’s just an inherent trait of this place. There’s something they say, about babies – that it takes time for them to be able to understand that when an object is gone from their view, it isn’t gone from reality. That’s what this building feels like. As though Alice had looked away from it and it stopped being, but then she’d been standing there in front of its doors and she’d thought – It’s you. There you are, where you’ve always been.

      It reminds her, almost, of the cabin that wasn’t supposed to be there. That wasn’t – isn’t – there. The cabin that she knows was and is there but exists only as a picture in her mind’s eye, the memory of a dream made tangible and vivid only for how much time she’s spent committing every shadowed detail of it to memory in her unwillingness to forget.

      Would she recognize the cabin now, if she saw it? Or would its face have shifted in its absence into something foreign?

      Alice catches herself drifting, eyes affixed to the papers spread across the other woman’s desk though her gaze bores through them. The centerpiece is one she’s seen before. A printed photograph she’d made, held in her own hands. That photograph. The one of…

      She has to look up, then. Away from that face and at the woman on the other side of the desk instead. Jesse Faden, she calls herself. Director of the Federal Bureau of Control. Alice hadn’t met the Director in either of her previous dealings with the FBC, but she’s fairly certain the Director then hadn’t been her. She looks too young to have been the Director of anything a decade ago, and with her no nonsense air and the way she’d reached out to Alice personally, the photographer thinks that this Director would have gotten involved back then had she been in charge. 

      “Is that what you think I am? Worried about dying?” If it comes out more bitter than intended, it’s only because Alice feels she’s gone unheard and misinterpreted for so long. She lets herself look down at the desktop again. At the photograph and the leering face captured within it. She hasn’t seen it, hasn’t looked at her own copy of it since she handed it over as evidence on her last visit with the Bureau. “About that thing coming back to kill me? Because I’m not. I’m worried about what it might do – what it might have already done – to him. To… Alan. I’ve tried just contenting myself with what’s left, with moving on. And then that showed up, and I tried coming to your Bureau for help, and that got me nowhere.”

      When Alice looks up again it’s with an uncharacteristic hardness in her expression, the kind of look she’s perfected to ward off prying paparazzi and unwelcome questions.

      “I hope you didn’t call me back here just to tell me to ‘stop worrying’.”

“What I’m trying to say is be there for yourself. You haven’t given up on him, but during this, you can’t give up on yourself either. If you do then there’s no one to stand up for neither of you.”

Her attention flickers to the desk, the photo in the center a deep contrast against the gathering of white paper, letters, maps, and tapes. It resembles a hurricane the more she looks at it, but if that hurricane were reverted, inside out, so now the eye held the storm. “Not saying you haven’t. Some of the records we have of you show that you mean business, and I get it.” She had her collection somewhere, back in an apartment, back before this place had a name in her mind, of scraps she had picked up on her search for her brother, Dylan.

Jesse had been content, for a short while. A month, two months. Living in the shadow of her loss, her childhood. The events in Ordinary follow her like ghosts, calling her back, wanting her to turn around and look them in the eye. As she got older she birthed from a chrysalis; a force of determination and looked onward without hesitation. Giving up wasn’t on her list of to-dos, and neither was being content.

She has a sense that Alice danced along a similar line. Just a rat in a maze. Each dead-end you find causes you to backtrack, only run into more walls that lead to the same empty path. The reward keeps moving, and you know it. You can smell and feel that it had been there. The scientists reflected those once at the bureau. Moving in the dark, not letting anyone in. In their eyes, they were the ones that deserved that reward, not the rats.

She was glad Alice had picked up.

“I wanted to let you know that we’re getting Alan’s investigation, your investigation, back in action.” Gaze lifts from the AWE’s records, as much as Polaris hms and ahs in the back of her mind at the sight of them, “I know you weren’t given the help you needed or the answers you wanted, and I’m here to make sure you do. Once we are ready, we can start to find out more about what happened.”.

She’s leaned back into her chair, and sits straighter. She feels at home here, they both do, yet she tries not to think about who sat here before, how easily the world within these walls fell victim to their mistakes. Their version of help residing in glass boxes, discarded reports, and a hunger to discover new boundaries ended up being swallowed by greed, and paranoia.

Jesse wants to change that. She had to change that, and it wouldn’t come to that again, not while she sat in this chair.

 “I understand if you don’t want to come back here, but I want you to be a part of this if you are interested which I hope you are. I’m not going to force you, and I am not going to stop you if you end up leaving to figure this out without us. Either way, you can always come back if you are interested in looking up anything that we have a record of. ”

[rosenfey]

▼ CONTROL — 4/?