I'm so broken

[books-n-quotes]

“I have given away my whole soul to someone who treats it as if it were a flower to put in his coat.”

— Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray (via books-n-quotes)

[somebodysedatemee-blog]

Derek Shepherd chased after Meredith Grey. He begged and begged and begged time and time again for her to go out with him. She kept telling him no until she finally caved. When she finally caved, she ended up falling in love with him. Hard. So so so hard. And then, he left her. He left her for Addison Montgomery-Shepherd. AKA, his wife.

I’ve unfortunately been down that road before. Having a guy beg several guys actually, begging for me to go out with them. For all 3 I eventually caved. I caved because I’m weak. I’m weak because I need constant male attention. In the end, I of course ended up getting hurt because once they got what they wanted, they left me. They all left me.

I relate to Meredith on a spiritual level. She truly is my spirit animal.

Men just enjoy the chase. It’s a game to them; it’s always a game.

[somebodysedatemee-blog]

Lies I tell myself

“I’m fine” I say as I fight back the tears forming in my eyes.

“I’m fine” I say as I fight back the urge to fill my stomach with pills.

“I’m fine” I say as I feel my arms throbbing with pain from all the cuts I left in them.

“I’m fine” I say as I feel all the pain running through my body like a river stream.

“I’m fine” I say as I’m reminded of all the people that hurt and left me.

“I’m fine” I say as I feel all the overwhelming emotions that make me want to end it all.

“I’m fine” I say as I remember all the people that say they’re there for me but are nowhere to be found.

“I’m fine” I say as I lie to myself.

“I’m fine” I say as I lie here with nothing but my thoughts and emotions, wanting to end it all.

[remanence-of-love]

staring at the moon by juansen dizon

[somebodysedatemee-blog]

They tell you to find healthy coping mechanisms.

They tell you to try new things.

They tell you everything will get better.

They tell you the pain will go away.

They tell you you’ll be okay.

They tell you it’s only temporary.

They tell you you’ll find happiness.

They tell you it’ll get easier.

They tell you dying isn’t worth it.

One thing they don’t tell you is how to deal with the pain.

It’s because they don’t understand the pain.

They don’t understand the feeling of being empty.

They don’t understand.

They’ll never understand.

[btpoetry]

I’m never the one.

Never the one chosen.

Never anyone’s favorite.

I’m all alone.

[btpoetry]

My love for you was different.

I felt like I couldn’t survive without you.

You were the stars in the sky and the oxygen in my lungs.

My world revolved around you.

But soon enough, as the years passed by,

the fire I had for you, the crave I had for just the

touch of your fingertips had faded away.

All that was left were the lonely crackle of embers

And the sound of my heart falling from my chest

and shattering on the ground.

[illusorysuggestion]

i think i’ve forgotten how happiness felt

[adheetee]

people are out there really breaking my heart huh

[adheetee]

man i love getting my heart broken into a million pieces

[adheetee]

i just live in a perpetual state of heartbreak

[adheetee]

i wish i never knew you. maybe then my heart would have felt less pain.

[adheetee]

u ever just tired of people fucking you over and then pretending like you fucked them over

[adheetee]

i wish i wasn’t this sad all the time lol

[adheetee]

people walking out of my life without an explanation is so funny because even though i understand why they’d want to have nothing to do with me, i’d still expect…someone to stay. just once.

[lostinthiswor1d]

[lostinthiswor1d]

I miss you …