Bread and kittens

mostly not bread and kittens anymore.

[tlirsgender]

"You know what's harder than Getting Better? Living Like That" is just the thesis for my whole shit going on right now honestly. You know what's harder than doing my physical therapy? Hurting All The Time. You know what's harder than addressing my gender dysphoria? Hurting All The Time

[tlirsgender]

I'm Doing The Hard Thing and it's *easier* than how I was living before. If you make yourself feel better you will have more energy to spend on Getting Better. Nice inch nails - the upward spiral. Crawl out of your grave Thursday

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Do NOT put me in the queue. I do NOT approve of time travel and! it makes my hair frizzy!!

[yamchaisawesome]

Putting you in for 2 years in the future.

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

My Gandalf, you really did...

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Send me back, I- I hate it here

[thiswasachoice]

This is a spreadsheet from Old Kingdom Egypt, written about 4500 years ago. It was part of the diary and logbook of Merer, an inspector responsible for the transportation of materials to Giza for the construction of Khufu's pyramid. There's something beautiful about the organization here, how his rows and columns would fit in just as well in Excel as any modern spreadsheet of delivery records. Across the yawning gulf of ages, we're united by this mundane and incredibly human task. I love reading things like this. They remind me of the fundamental similarity of humans across time. They were no less intelligent or skilled than we, and oftentimes had to be moreso, to account for the many technological aids they lacked.

I often hear people talk about how showing a smartphone to a medieval peasant would shock him, but I want to show Merer Excel. I think pivot tables would make him cry tears of joy.

[fibro-memes]

[visorforavisor]

I think disability justice would be easier if abled people understood that being disabled is a mixture of all three of

I can’t do that without negative consequences

I can’t do that unless I have support for it

I can’t do that

and that trying to treat one of these as if it’s another one will get you nowhere.

[parkchanwoohoo]

Incredible

[kiefbowl]

I love when people are like “I can’t believe you reblogged that despite their user name, icon, bio, and last twenty posts” bc to me my dash is the only part of this website and I’m not slowing down to look at urls you could all be the same person

[twisted-little-fairy-story]

#spiritual successor is people being like why didnt you read my pinned before you reblogged!!!#dude i am not. i am not vetting every blog#i am here to backread for 45mins and rb 30 posts in a row and disappear#tumblr life

[finnslay]

opening tumblr in march and it's just like "huh. knife weather we're having."

[netherworldpost]

[finnslay]

opening tumblr in march and it's just like "huh. knife weather we're having."

[netherworldpost]

[teaboot]

Do you think Clark Kent's first few major articles were about the continued presence of lead pipes in parts of Metropolis' water system

[teaboot]

(Average Metropolis reader after investigative reporter C. Kent's 452nd article on yet another case of landlords/business owners/factories' continued use of lead pipes/paint/gas/glass knowingly exposing the public to dangerously toxic lead levels) what the fuck happened to this guy

[teaboot]

One day Bruce Wayne mentions in an interview that heroes like Superman are overrated, as the most effective way to reduce crime is to provide public resources and improve local infrastructure, then cites how neighboring city Metropolis has effectively lowered their violent crime by 13% after addressing their outdated water system and investing low income housing. the reporter conducting the interview suddenly starts looking a little uncomfortable

[teaboot]

To be clear, Clark is still a fantastic investigative reporter. He still has to track down the sources to prove all this shit

[teaboot]

"Who, Clark Kent? Yeah, we're pretty sure he's a Meta. Is he a superhero? Like what, "Lead-detector guy"? "Captain pipes?" Don't get me wrong, he's a great guy and it's a handy trick, but it's lead detection, not laser vision. He's not about to go running around in tights any time soon."

[sindri42]

I just love the idea of a cape maintaining their secret identity by pretending to be a completely different and less impressive kind of parahuman.

[roach-works]

everyone assumes that kent is so squirrely around superheros because he’s just desperately hoping not to be conscripted to the JLA to fix their plumbing

[teaboot]

Local Metropolis Reporter Publically Recognized For Contributions To The City; Awarded Medal Of Distinction

[championofdnd]

They tried to get superman to present the medal but he was offended at being called "overrated" in comparison to Clark so he declined

[teaboot]

Counter offer: Bruce Wayne disguised as Superman

[garaks-padded-bra]

Diagram of my kitten who fell asleep on my lap that i drew through tears. Pleawse. I cant get up

[kokodrawings]

My pieces for the @founders-tarot-zine :

Mito Uzumaki (The Empress), Senju Family (10 of cups) and Tobirama (Death, for the digital zine)

Super fun project and awesome mods, thanks again for the invite! 💖💖

[goddessofroyalty]

Crack AU where Anakin can all of a sudden hear the background music that we all hear. Those pleasant chats with Palpy become a lot more ominous. Though Anakin admits that the fights have become a lot more epic. Thoughts?

Hahahahaha. Love it!

And okay, my first though was “and the galaxy was saved because even Anakin Skywalker would struggle to keep trusting Palpatine with that music playing in the background”

Anakin think he’s gone COMPLETELY insane (maybe he’s finally been electrocuted too many times and its fried his brain). He doesn’t tell anyone though because he can still fight just fine just… everything is a lot more musical. He doesn’t want to be thought crazy and taken off the front lines.

Once he figures out what the various musical cues mean he actually finds them useful in figuring out how dangerous a situation is. Also battles are so much cooler now and boring landscapes are slightly less boring because at least now they have mood music. Yep, he can live with this.

(Although he is always confused why the ominousness that is The Imperial March starts playing at some of his decisions)

[angelqueen04]

*cracks up*

[forcearama]

Anakin: I’m so worried about something. I should probably keep my feelings to myself and attempt to solve my problems by working with Palpatine. He seems like he has my best interests at heart.

Music: DUN DUN DUN, DUN DA-DUN, DUN DA-DUN!

Anakin: [pauses] [looks around] Uh…OK. I mean, I’ll…go talk to Obi-Wan?

Music: [hopeful woodwind instruments]

Anakin: …and be open and honest about my life and what is bothering me, and try to work out a non-violent resolution to my problems?

Music: [Force Theme plays]

Anakin: [smiles] All right! Huh. This is helpful. 

[angelqueen04]

Positive reinforcement at its finest. ;D

[ialreadyreadthatfanfic]

#lol#i’m just imagining the force throwing its metaphysical hands in the air like ‘subtlety obviously isn’t working with this one so have a whole#symphony of hints young reckless one’ (via @likealeafonthewind)

I’m crying from laughter, this is beautiful.

Anakin: *fucks up*

The Force: Son, please… Guess I’m gonna enable the hints menu.

[forcearama]

THE HINTS MENU. *dies* 

Maybe Obi-Wan hears the music, too, and then the day is saved. 

Obi-Wan: [walking away] Welp, guess it’s off to kill Grievous I’m sure Anakin will be fi – 

Music: [Duel of the Fates] 

Obi-Wan: OMG not this shit again [runs back down the hall towards Anakin]

Anakin: [running back towards Obi-Wan] Obi-Wan I just heard that Ominous Music again and also I secretly married Padme and she’s pregnant and I haven’t slept in 6 days and I keep thinking she’s going to die and I AM FREAKING THE FUCK OUT and if you leave I will 100% end up killing everyone and –

Obi-Wan: – oh my God! OK…it’s OK, I heard my own ominous music a second ago when I was getting ready to leave and so I won’t and we’ll fix th – 

Anakin: – I heard mine when I thought about maybe talking to the Chancellor instead of y–

Palpatine: [sidling up behind them smugly] Everything all right, gentlemen?

Music: [scary ass music from the opera scene] 

Anakin and Obi-Wan: AHHHH

[forcearama]

I randomly thought of this post again today and it made me laugh 

[forcearama]

For the record in that last line I always pictured them clinging to each other in fear like Shaggy and Scooby: 

[albaparthenicevelut-deactivated]

ACCURATE OH MY GOD

[b3n-kenobi]

@deadcatwithaflamethrower

[deadcatwithaflamethrower]

I would so read this.

[inqorporeal]

@forcearama

[forcearama]

Palpatine’s face is killing me. 

[icanbringyouincold]

I can’t breathe oh my god this is fucking funny

[obi-wan-kenoboomer]

This is great

[the-coruscanti-blogger]

I think (Maybe? Probably?) I’ve already reblogged this, but it’s so good that one reblog won’t suffice.

[tpwrtrmnky]

girls with adhd playing long rpgs like "i am overwhelmed by the state of the save file i left off with last time my attention arbitrarily fell onto this game. time to start from scratch."

[tpwrtrmnky]

"yeah i fucking love this game. i've bought it on console and pc, and then the remaster too. i have no idea how it ends, i only get 40% of the way through the main story each time"

[jeusussavearmyveteran1205]

[ivvyela]

nothing on this god's green earth can convince me that peter parker doesn't have an ao3 account where he is elbows deep in a 'rise of skywalker' fix-it fic. like, fully invested in it, been writing it pre-spider bite with ned, who is just as enthusiastic about it. but the thing is, it's really hard to do updates when you are literally spider-man.

every three months he'll post and in the author's note there's some shit like "sorry this took a while, i got shot seven times :/" or "i know it's been a minute, i literally got hit by a bus and then stabbed in the leg, but i'm all good!" or sometimes ned would log in and post with a note "hey i'm a friend posting on the author's behalf, they're healing from severe hypothermia but promised an update, so here it is!"

and the fic just gets increasingly more popular for the author notes alone. a good handful of the comments are something along the lines of "i'm not even in the star wars fandom, i'm just here to see if the author is good" or "every update i cheer for another day the author gets to live at this point"

and any reader who is a native new yorker kind of pieces together that holy shit the author might be spider-man because the timeline adds up, and they just fully embrace it. spider-man will stop a robbery and the guy behind the counter will ask when the next chapter will be up. spider-man returns a stolen backpack to a girl and she'll tell him that he "really got poe's voice down so well, it's really impressive."

ned thinks it is hilarious. mj finds out about the fic from twitter, to peter's absolute horror, and changes peter's contact name to "friendly neighborhood ao3 author". but the worst thing to happen is after an avengers battle where peter took a pretty big hit and ends up in med-bay. and during a press conference, when someone asks how spider-man is healing, tony just drops "spidey won't be down for too long. the star wars fic will be updated within the week, probably."

ao3 goes down for two days.

[jellopen]

new son