I pray you never lose the goodness in your heart.

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@something-clevver-blog
I pray you never lose the goodness in your heart.
I think I have high expectations because I assume off rip we are grown , we've already been through enough to know that we must be honest , and mindful and caring . But I failed to realize that not everyone experiences brought them to where mine brought me .
What’s the feeling? What is it called? When your stomach churns and feels empty and you feel like there’s a hole in your chest that wind is passing through. It almost feels like breathing is a luxury and any moment can be taken away from you. You’re constantly on the verge of tears but you tell yourself its not worth it. You just want to lay there. Keep thinking, even though it hurts. Then you get angry because in some circumstances, this feeling has arised in only a matter of a week or so. You’re being a baby, you’re acting like a child. Yet you can’t stop yourself from laying there and thinking about it. The feeling, the presence, the warmth. And then you remember that there’s an absence of it, that you miss the feeling and crave it almost. Is it addiction? Obsession?
Two years younger and he still has a vice like grip on my heart but I’m pretty sure he’s just looking past into the distance because of how short I am. Thoughts of guilt invade my thinking space and I find myself thinking I did something wrong. What is this feeling? Why is this happening? I can’t…
I can’t breathe..
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