summary: in a world where love is given an expiration date, you find your forever home in an unexpected place.
word count: 10.1k
tags: soulmate!au, best friends to lovers, mostly romance + fluff, fake dating if you squint, reader is afab w/ gender neutral pronouns + fem terms (noona) used
author's note: finally got around to finishing this... it's been a long while coming and i couldn't get myself to write for various reasons and i'm so happy it's all done and out there! hope you enjoy and wishing everyone a wonderful holiday season <3
For as long as Soobin can remember, heβs been counting down the days.Β
To summer vacation, to the end of his shift at his part time job, to the start of a long awaited trip, to anything. But thereβs something else that counts down on his behalf, something that he doesnβt particularly want to count.
That something is inlaid in a nondescript watch wrapped around his wrist. Everyone gets one once they turn 18, and as far as heβs concerned, its only purpose is to ruin relationships. The cruel hands of time assign a βbest byβ date to each romantic encounter, flashing on the screen from the first meeting, with each failure promising to lead the user closer and closer to their fated lover. If you ask Soobin, itβs all bullshit. How would a stupid watch know anything about fate, anyways?
Itβs a typical Thursday night, and Soobinβs mindlessly scrolling through Time to Love, the government mandated dating app that all phones come with, as per usual when he canβt decide on something to watch. He has yet to meet the weekly two date quota, having only gone on one on Tuesday (important to note that heβs already forgotten his name), and heβs running out of time, and he really canβt afford to pay that 100,000 won fine this week. Well, he canβt afford to pay it at any point in time, but this weekβs been especially rough on him, and he doesnβt want to shell out any more of his meager savings just because he couldnβt get a date, of all things.Β
The names and faces on his phone screen are a blur as his thumb swipes left aimlesslyβ he doesnβt really give that much of a shit who he ends up with, because at the end of the day, heβll say βNoβ when the app asks him if heβd liked them and give them a terrible review saying they were incompatible, because frankly, the algorithm seems to always be wrong when it comes to his matches. Either that, or itβs because he cares so little that he doesnβt bother properly vetting his matches.
Heβs resigned himself to his fate anyways; heβll fill up his progress bar with a bunch of shitty matches until the algorithm decides itβs time for him to settle down, then when he finds his βsoulmateβ (if you could even call it that), heβll just be doomed to a loveless arranged marriage set in place by a computer and die unhappy. He canβt envision happiness ever coming out of something so lifeless, so cold, so thatβs just how it has to be. At least it gives him something to do instead of rewatching the same three anime series over and over again.
Whateverβ heβll just swipe right on the next person and go on yet another unmemorable date tomorrow. Lee Saerom, the profile reads. Sheβs exceptionally pretty, he has to admit, and sheβs an artist, (and sheβs older, but donβt ask him about that) so heβll just ask her about her work and let her ramble for the allotted two hours while he smiles and nods.
He swipes right, and a bright pink heart pattern fills his screen, signifying a successful match. Obnoxious. Itβs replaced with a time and a place, and he lets out a groan. Congratulations! Your date is scheduled for 6pm, at the Coffee Shop. He was supposed to meet you at 7 tomorrow for your usual Friday night updates.Β
Fuck. What if the date goes on longer than an hour?
Heβs never been late for your weekly meetups, but he figures youβll understand, since itβs completely out of his control.
Surely you wonβt kill him, right?
Just in case, he recites a prayer to himself before he tucks in for the night.
Youβre already nursing your third vodka soda of the night and Soobin is still nowhere to be found, which is unusual. Heβs never been the most punctual person, but standing you up for an hour after your usual meeting time isnβt like him, either. He said heβd be late, but he didnβt specify how lateβ¦ youβll grill him later when he explains himself, and youβll make him buy you a drink or two as compensation. With the comfort of a free drink in mind, youβre about to order your fourth round when Soobin finally stumbles in through the door of the bar, eyes scanning each booth until his gaze lands on you, and with an apologetic smile, heβs sliding into the seat across from you.Β
He gestures to your glass, brow curled upwards, which you know means heβs teasing you. βWhat number is this one, noona? You always polish these things off like theyβre nothing.β
βThis is number three, with number four on the way, and thatβs because they are. You owe me at least two for taking so long to get here, asshole.β You let out an indignant huff as you slurp the last of the cocktail through your straw, lips jutting in a comical pout.
βOkay, okay. Next oneβs on me.β Soobin relents with an endeared laugh, waving down the waitstaff and ordering a beer for himself, along with another vodka soda for you.Β
βOkay, now spill.β
βWhat? Am I supposed to have some hot gossip for you? Donβt make me guess about what drama Iβve somehow found myself in on accident.β Heβs visibly confused, brows knitted together, and you roll your eyes at him.
βObviously the only reason you would ever skip out on your dear noona was if TTL scheduled you for a date during our usual time, so spill. How bad was this one?βΒ
His lips part in understanding, (you can practically see the figurative lightbulb flickering on) head bobbing in an exaggerated nod before pulling his phone out, hand outstretched to show you his dateβs profile. βI mean, she was okay, I guess. Pretty girl, and she was older, but she spent the entirety of our time slot babbling about her latest art project and how itβs supposedly going to blow away the industry. Which is fine, I guess, because you know I hate talking on these dates, but if she said βbrush techniqueβ and βnegative spaceβ one more time I think I wouldβve tried to drown myself in my caffe mocha. The app thought so too, I guess, because when we checked our expiration date, it was exactly an hour from the start time, so itβs not like I missed out on my forever soulmate or whatever.β
Each TTL date is scheduled for an arbitrary amount of time, depending on your expiration date, which is determined from the first moment you meetβ sometimes itβs just a few minutes, an hour or two, and anything longer than 24 hours is given a two hour time slot maximum. Thereβs supposedly an extremely rare case where you arenβt given an expiration date from the get go, regardless of your progress, meaning that youβve found your soulmate by sheer luck, but itβs almost unheard ofβ most people donβt find their soulmates until theyβve completely filled up their bars, something about needing ample data to calculate optimal compatibility.
You ogle at his phone screen for a bitβ she really was stunningβ then guffaw at the thought of Soobin nodding halfheartedly, listening to a pretty girl talk his ear off, when most men would probably kill to be in his position. βDamn, if even an older woman that pretty canβt hold your attention, and the app confirms that, you know itβs badβ¦ So, where does that put your progress at? Werenβt you at like, 80% last week?β
Soobinβs face practically scrunches in on itself at your remark, tapping the app once more to check his updated progress bar. βIβm going to ignore that. Iβm atβ¦ 88% after I reviewed Saerom and that guy from earlier in the week. Guess it wasnβt a total waste if I got 8% closer to completion. What are you at now?β
You lift your phone to open TTL, your progress bar only having inched 2% closer to completion after your date yesterday. β75% now. I think the algorithm is personally fucking me over, or something. My last few matches have been nice enough, but I cannot keep up with their energy. Itβs wringing me dry. I must be the only person in the entire world who doesnβt want a golden retriever for a partner. My date yesterday just about knocked me out for good, he was that energetic.β
βTell me about it,β Soobin commiserates. βIβve very clearly expressed my distaste for bubbly and talkative people who probably peaked in high school, but thatβs all theyβre spitting out in my for you page. No offense to them, I donβt think Iβve met any straight up assholes since that one girl back in June, but itβs like the app is purposely recommending the most incompatible people to meβ wait, yesterday? And I didnβt hear about this?β
You give him a pointed look, silently conveying that he also didnβt inform you of his date today until ten minutes ago. He gets the message and holds his hands up in defeat, then gestures for you to speak, dimples peeking out as he purses his lips. You sigh, rubbing your temples as you recall the most chaotic two hours of the week, maybe even your life.
βOkay, lookβ¦ for the record, he was very nice to me, a perfect gentleman, but my god, could that guy talk. He was practically falling at his knees trying to impress me, which wouldβve earned him a few points in my book, but his mouth was moving maybe five miles a minute at all times without a moment of rest. It was like watching a child hopped up on sugar, to be honest. He talked for forty whole minutes nonstop about pizza. Donβt even get me started on how passionate he was about his workout routine.β
Your drinks finally come around, and Soobin hands you your frosted glass, which you gratefully take a long sip out of before continuing. βAnd before you say anything, no, he was nothing like Kai. Also, Kai is literally like my child, and just because I babysat him all those years does not mean I want to date someone like him.β
Soobin parts his lips to respond, then scrunches his nose in distaste as you take the words right of his mouth, opting to down his drink instead. βYouβre no fun.β
βBut thatβs why you love me, right?β
βSure, noona, sure.β
βThatβs it, asshole, you owe me another drink.β
Sunday rolls around, which means youβve got to start scoping out this weekβs datesβ you hate leaving anything to the last minute, and you like to leave the end of your week as free as possible (no one is prying your precious rest time from you, not even a beautiful person with the worldβs best personality).Β
Which means youβre mindlessly swiping through a sea of profiles, hoping you find someone thatβs at least remotely interesting. Youβre prepared for a long night of doom scrolling, but you stop cold in your tracks as you come across a familiar name and face, and a lump forms in your throat.
Choi Soobin.
The algorithm is really fucking with you now. It has to be. Youβve never once even considered your best friend as a potential suitor, not because he isnβt insanely attractive and charming (and funny, and easy to talk to, andβ¦), but because heβs your best friend. Youβve known him for so long, youβve seen him cry when he couldnβt get the Pokemon card he wanted when he was young enough to need allowance to buy it, and heβs seen you for long enough to know you threw the nastiest toddler tantrums over being denied an ice cream purchaseβ the point is that you know him a little too well, and you know from experience that thatβs not always ideal in romance.Β
But you have been having terrible luck with your matches for so long, and two hours of Soobinβs undivided attention doesnβt seem so bad, and it would be a good time, at leastβ¦
You kick yourself mentally for even thinking of it. Heβs your best friend, for godβs sake.
Yet your thumb continues to hover over his profile, quivering as you make the motion to swipe right on him without touching the screen. The guilt and the risk of maybe ruining your friendship forever clearly isnβt enough to stop you from considering him.Β
The gentle, familiar smile that heβs sporting in his profile picture pierces your heart, and youβre not sure why. Maybe youβve always had a thing for him unconsciously, maybe you just want someone who actually gets you, maybe youβre just running out of options. Or maybe youβre just tired of chasing after something you know is futile, and you want to take a chance on something, on someone, that might actually be good for you. On someone that you know would be good to you, and for you.
And so, with bated breath, you swipe right.
[Time to Love: Y/N has liked you! Open the app for more details.]
To say Soobin is struck with disbelief would be an understatement. Heβs practically gaping at his phone, and he knows youβd be laughing your ass off and making fun of him if you could see him. But itβs precisely that typical flippant attitude of yours thatβs got him perplexed about this development.
Heβd be lying if he said heβs never once thought of you that wayβ heβs always thought you were pretty and kind hearted, despite your temper, and youβve always been there for him, through thick and thin, even when he was being kind of a dick. That definitely counts for something. But heβs never thought about crossing that boundary, because 1) heβs not allowed to pursue anyone he doesnβt match with through the app anyways, and 2) matching with you could make or break your bond forever (heβs leaning towards break, though, because like he said, the watch is bullshit). In short, heβs a fucking coward and a little too cynical for his own good.Β
But here it is, an opportunity for a date with you, in all its glory, and initiated by you, no less. He should be celebrating, or at least hyped up, because maybe itβll all work out, maybe this is the solution to all his lukewarm matches over the last few months, but instead heβs downright terrified. Thereβs absolutely no way that you both come out of this unscathed. Thereβs no such thing as a perfect forever if itβs decided by a computer. There canβt possibly be a happy ending at the end of this road.
He shakes his head, as if it would clear his head of the panicked thoughts. Youβre still his best friend, at the end of the day, he tells himself, and heβs sure that youβll fight just as hard as he will to keep him in your life. So he holds onto the tiniest sliver of hope that somehow your relationship doesnβt crash and burn spectacularly, opens the app, and swipes right on you.
Congratulations! Your date is scheduled for 3pm, at the Aquarium.Β
A new notification pops up. Soobinβs heart stirs.
y/n noona: see you tomorrow β₯οΈ
He feels guilty as a wave of excitement washes over him. He shouldnβt be feeling like this. Youβre his best friend. His dear noona. He may as well be signing away your friendship for good. But itβd be worse if he didnβt match your enthusiasm.
soob: yup, see you tomorrow noona :]
Itβs only 5 minutes past the scheduled meeting time, and already Soobinβs panicking that youβve changed your mind and cancelled on him, writing this off as a mistake. Heβs trying his very best to remain nonchalant, itβs just a date with his best friend, who he might have a sapling of a crush on, no big deal, right? Or maybe it is for the best if you cancel, then heβd have one less crippling fear to worry about.
Heβs rethinking his outfit for the umpteenth timeβ he didnβt want to look like he was trying too hard, not in front of you because youβd probably think it was silly, but he also doesnβt want you thinking he shows up to dates looking like a slob. (For the record, he thinks heβs got a decent sense of fashion. Heβs better than Kai, at least, though that isnβt saying much.) Heβs internally debating if he shouldβve gone with the navy polo shirt instead of the grey cardigan draped over his shoulders, or if he shouldβve gone with the black slacks instead of the light wash jeans, but his jumbled thoughts dissipate as you tap on his shoulder, shit-eating grin and all.Β
βWhatβs with you, Soob? You look like the fate of the universe depends on you, and you only have 5 minutes to save all of humanity.β You tease, nudging your shoulder against his. Oh, if only you knew what was really weighing on him.
He has half a mind to swat your shoulder, but heβs a little too aware that the two of you are supposed to be on a date, so instead he shoves his hands into his pockets. To his surprise, youβre more dressed up than usual, (heβs used to seeing you exclusively in oversized hoodies) andβ wait, you two are practically matching, from the grey cardigan, light wash jeans, all the way down to the white sneakers. The only difference is that youβve buttoned up your cardigan so that it functions more as a blouse, but you two clearly have definitely mastered the art of accidental couple looks.
βOkay, awkwardβ¦ one of us has to change.β He teases in an attempt to ease his own racing mind, dimples peeking out as he stifles a laugh. You let out an indignant huff, pushing his massive frame with no success. He doesnβt even budge.
βNot my fault that youβre trying to steal my look. I wore it better, by the way,β You retort, but truth be told, youβre reeling at the sight of him. Youβve only ever seen him in his stuffy work attire and the worn-out, faded shirts he refuses to throw out, and seeing him in a comparably softer, more preppy look is making you see him with new eyes.
You shake your head, as if doing so will reset your perspective to factory settings and make you see him as just your best friend again. (spoiler alert: it doesnβt. Soobin is still handsome and he looks very cute, and youβre still very much affected by it.) βOkay, so. First things first. Should we check our apps? To see if, like, weβre compatible, or I donβt know.β Your voice is stiff, like youβre buffering, and you donβt think youβve ever been this awkward around Soobin, at least not since the day you met.
Soobin turns up his nose in disagreement and covers his watch screen and yours. βNah, thatβs bullshit. Itβs already all decided, isnβt it? Itβs been decided from the second we stepped into the aquarium. No point in checking now, we should decide for ourselves if this is something we want to pursue, instead of letting some computer dictate that. When itβs over, itβs over, and we can just go back to being friends, right?β
βWell, I think itβs probably better to know when to give this a rest, instead of constantly wondering if my best friend is set to be my long-term romantic partner, or whatever.β You had a point. But a part of Soobin didnβt feel ready to face the fact that you might not want to see him again like this. A much smaller part of him is still fearful that you two might not be able to turn back from this.
βOkay, okay, fine. We can check itβbut not now. If we make it to a third date, then we can check how long we have. But you have to be honest and not touch it whatsoever.β Soobin doesnβt make any move to mention that he isnβt interested in seeing you again, but you donβt want to just assume that heβs into you, so you test the waters.
βOkay, I promise to be honest. But why the third date? Are you really that keen on seeing me?β Youβre trying to be teasing, but you feel more desperate than anything.
Soobin doesnβt answer for a moment, and you think that youβve said the wrong thing. Just as youβre about to apologize, he replies, βIf we make it to a third dateβ¦ then Iβll know whether weβre actually giving this a proper shot and not just for shits and giggles or as an escape from our other failed connections.β
His sincerity both surprises and flatters you, and you canβt tell if youβre supposed to be frozen in shock or hugging him, or a secret third thing, so you just stay still, absently fiddling with your fingers.
When you look up again, Soobinβs holding out his hand, and you look at him with obvious confusion. Rolling his eyes, he takes your hand in his, lips pursed into a thin line. You want to make some clever jab at him, but his hands are warm and soft and they practically swallow up your much smaller ones, and youβre filled with a wash of emotions so intense that you canβt muster up the strength to retort.
Soobin notices that youβre still visibly perplexed, and he mutters. βWeβre on a date, you know. Weβve got to act the part.β Itβs a half truth at best; he does want to give this date a proper chance, but selfishly, he really just wants to hold your hand for two hours. If you catch onto his white lie, you donβt show it, but he doesnβt miss the rosy hue that colors your cheeks as you nod.
Heβs right, you thinkβ it is a date, and youβre the one who swiped on him first, so the least you can do is treat him like a possible suitor and not just your best friend. He deserves that much, at least, and you need to know whether this bundle of butterflies in your stomach is a passing feeling or a dull ache youβve forgotten about, so you let him lead you into the dimly lit array of fish tanks.
Youβre noticing a lot of things about Soobin.
You notice that Soobinβs eyes practically twinkle when he gets excited. Itβs never been something youβve taken note of, but you canβt help but notice it now, every time he points out a species of fish he recognizes. Itβs cute. Youβre not sure if youβre supposed to find your best friend cute, but you do.
You notice how his comically long fingers slot in between yours, and youβre really starting to like how it feels, though youβd die of embarrassment if you admitted as much.Β
Not to mention heβs an absolutely perfect gentleman. Heβs constantly asking you if you want something to eat, if youβre tired, if youβre cold, and you let him know that youβre fine each time. When you accidentally pull apart your shoelaces, heβs quick to kneel down and tie them up for you. When he stops to grab himself a bottle of juice, he offers one to you, too.
Had Soobin always been this pretty? So cute? And so sweet? How had you never taken notice of him like this all these years? (You know the answer to that, but youβre still surprised at what youβre noticing nonetheless.)
Soobin catches you staring at him while youβre both supposed to be looking at a school of clownfish, and you expect him to make some egotistical joke at your expense, but instead he gives you a warm smile, eyes crinkling into crescents, and god dammit to hell, you melt.Β
The two hours pass by like nothing, and unlike your past few dates, youβre dreading the end of it, and you wish that the beep signifying itβs over would never come. To your disappointment, he releases your hand as you approach the entrance, and your hand is already missing his warmth. You turn to face him; well, not really, because you canβt bear to make eye contact with him, not when you spent the better part of two hours shamelessly ogling at him.
His voice cuts in between the thoughts rattling around in your head, and he sounds so apprehensive that it worries you. βCan I ask you something? No, wait, can you promise me something?β
You know how seriously Soobin takes his promises, so youβre a little scared for what heβs going to say next, but you nod anyway.
βPromise me that if this doesnβt work out, weβll still be friends. Please.β The last word is so quiet that you almost miss it, and when you finally muster the courage to meet his gaze, heβs giving you a pleading look so earnestly that it breaks your heart a little.Β
βI promiseβ no, I pinky promise. Weβll be friends, no matter what.β
Since he was younger, Soobinβs held the belief that pinky promises are binding, and he knows that you know this, so you hold out your pinky, hoping that this can ease whatever worries he has on his mind.
You pinky promised. Soobin knows that itβs your unspoken way of assuring him (youβve never been the most verbally affectionate, anyways), a quiet way of letting him know that he means just as much to you as you do to him. He links pinkies with you to seal the promise, feeling just a little bit lighter as you both make your way to the subway station together, shoulders bumping all the while.
Soobin just really, really hopes that youβll be able to keep that promise.
[How would you rate your date?]
[β β β β β ]
Congratulations! Your next date is scheduled for 8pm tonight, at the Night Market.
You shouldnβt be surprised that your next date with Soobin comes so soonβ you still have your weekly quotas to meet, and the app always schedules dates within 24 hours of matching or a positive rating, but truth be told, your surprise is solely because you just donβt know how to face him. You two had made that pinky promise to stay friends regardless of the circumstances, but youβd also resolved to treat him like a potential suitor while you two are seeing each other, so where does that leave you?Β
Well, it leaves you in front of the closet with no idea what to wear. You want to look good (for Soobin, but youβre in denial at the moment), but itβs just a night market, and you know youβll never hear the end of it if Soobin catches on that you went through lengths just to impress him.
Speaking of the devil, your phone flickers on to reveal a text from him, and you scoff as you scan its contents.
y/n noona: soy/n noona: whatβs the deal with tonight
soob: aw, noona, do you want to see me again that badly? iβm excited, see you later tonight β₯οΈ
y/n noona: shut up, you clearly want to see me again too. donβt be late or iβm stealing your wallet laterΒ
y/n noona: also whatβs the dress code, are we matching again :p
soob: i mean, if you insistβ¦ π i knew you wanted me
y/n noona: nvm youβre getting me in a hoodie and my raggedy sweats with the hole in the knee, fuck you
soob: no no i take it back iβm sorryΒ
y/n noona: ok fine you get spared just this once
y/n noona: [IMG_3687.jpg]
y/n noona: final outfit check. if weβre going to be matching it will be your decision so choose wisely
soob: wait thatβs not fair
soob: noona come back
soob: DONβT LEAVE ME HANGING LIKE THIS
[y/n noona has βLikedβ your message]
soob: you are so mean to me
You let out a sigh of relief you didnβt know you were holding when Soobin arrives, clad in a blue flannel thatβs nearly identical to yours, black tee, beige cargos, and a black shoulder bag. Youβd been hoping he would follow through, and thereβs a small surge of pride at how youβll be walking around the market, hand in hand, in matching outfits, but thereβs something you hadnβt been counting on.
Heβs wearing his glasses.Β
Youβve always known that Soobin doesnβt have the best eyesight (heβs constantly squinting to see things, but so do you), but now that youβre seeing him in a new light, his usual black frames are suddenly the most attractive thing in the world, and you may as well be holding a neon sign that blares βI HEART NERDSβ for him to see.
You make a painfully pathetic attempt to mask your delight by waving at him with a grin, and thankfully Soobin doesnβt notice, or if he does, he doesnβt make any show of it, and instead he simply salutes at you with two fingers and cracks a grin. As he sidles up to you, his large hand slips into yours with a little too much ease, fingers immediately interlocking with yours, and it sends your head into a frenzy all over again. As if heβs aware that your mind is going haywire, Soobin leans down towards you, and for a second you think heβs going to kiss you.
Youβre frantically trying to make some motion to stop him, itβs so sudden and your cheeks are way too hot now, and heβs way too close, and your damn arms wonβt budgeβ
βI hope you came ready to eat. I came armed with a fuck load of cash because I am going to stuff myself silly with food, and I am not getting turned away by the βcash onlyβ booths.β Thereβs a fire of determination in Soobinβs eyes, paired with a wide grin, and you donβt know whether to be concerned for him or for yourself, but nonetheless, youβre a little relieved that you completely misread the situation. Before you can say anything in response, though, heβs dragging you towards the sweeping lines of booths, already making a beeline for some takoyaki.Β
The tray full of octopus balls in Soobinβs hands is steaming and they smell absolutely mouthwatering, and, in true Soobin fashion, he gets over excited and tries to pop the entire thing in his mouth in one go. He immediately regrets it, of course, because immediately heβs whining over the fact that his tongue is now most definitely burnt and numb from the piping hot orb of batter heβd just tried to scarf down. You might be finding him insanely attractive now, but heβs still as clumsy as ever, and you canβt stifle the laughter that bubbles in your throat at the sight.
βDumbassβ¦ you should know damn well that you shouldnβt put a whole takoyaki in your mouth like that.β You tease, snickering as he fans his tongue once he swallows.
βShut up! I couldnβt help myself!β He lets out a childish huff, stuffing another ball into his mouth with a comically exaggerated pout, and consequently huffing and puffing at the heat that blooms in his mouth once more. The whole display is undeniably adorable, and it takes all of the willpower you have to resist the burning desire to squish his cheeks.Β
The tray of takoyaki is polished off in no time, and a bowl of bingsu, a cup of fish cake soup, two sticks of tanghulu, a plate of sweet rice cakes, an ice cream cone, and a million other things you lost track of follow suit into the bottomless pit that seems to be Soobinβs stomach. He wasnβt kidding when he said he came ready to eatβ heβs plowing through the booths like itβs his last meal on Earth. Heβs gracious enough to offer you half of his portions, at least, so itβs not like heβs leaving you to starve. (youβd kill him if he did, though.) Once heβs had his fill, his lips curl up into a mischievous grin as he jabs his thumb in the direction of a different section of the market, one filled with countless games: target shooting, beanbag toss, dartsβ the row of booths seems to stretch on forever.Β
βOh, youβre on, Soob. Donβt think Iβm going easy on you because weβre on a date.β
βYeah? Donβt think Iβm going easy on you because youβre older.β
Contrary to both of your words, Soobin is absolutely fucking terrible at the beanbag toss, despite his long arms definitely giving him an advantage, and youβre no good at shooting or throwing and aiming at anything, really, so the two of you leave each booth with empty hands, though youβre laughing as if youβve hit the jackpot.
Even though you two fail spectacularly at every single game they have available, youβre suddenly aware of how much your cheeks hurt. From smiling. From laughing. When was the last time that happened on a date? Or ever, even?
Soobin ventures off on his own while youβre lost in thought, and he returns from his little solo adventure with yet another serving of tanghulu (the third one of the night: strawberry for him, tangerine for you this time). Youβre reaching out to grab the sweet from his outstretched hand, when suddenly you jump as loud popping sounds blare overhead. Thereβs a beat of silence before a flurry of colorful lights blooms in the sky, and your shoulders relax once you realize itβs just fireworks.
Youβre admiring the colors and shapes of the fireworks display as you crunch on your tanghulu, and youβre so enraptured you almost miss the feeling of someoneβs gaze on you. Almost.
When you turn to confirm your suspicions, youβre right, itβs Soobin whoβs staring at you, but heβs staring at you so intently, with such intensity, that you immediately grow flusteredβ heβs never looked at you like that beforeβ and youβre immensely thankful that the flashes of light in the sky mask the rosy hue thatβs surely staining your cheeks. Just when youβre about to swing your head away to focus your attention on the fireworks once more, his hand flies out to cradle your chin in his palm, keeping your gaze fixated on him.Β
Then heβs closing the distance, slowly but surely, fixated on you all the while to gauge your reaction, and even though youβre frozen in shock, you donβt think you wouldβve moved, anyways. Your eyes flutter shut at the last minute, nerves getting the better of you, until his lips brush against yours tentatively, as if heβs hesitating, holding back.
You meet his gaze once more, and neither of you say a word, you just nod in response to the pleading look in his eyes, as if asking your permission. He breaks out into the most beautiful smile, one that you wish you could snap a mental photo of and tuck away in a safe place in your mind, and then heβs kissing you. Actually kissing you.
He kisses you with such fervor, as if heβs been wanting to do this his whole life, and you canβt help the way you practically melt in his hold, pressing yourself against his broad figure. The fireworks display is all but forgotten, the only thing on either of your minds being the way your lips meld into each other, and the way your hands clasp together.
Soobinβs in a daze when you two finally break away for a much-needed breath, and youβre sure you look like youβre in an equally hazy state. For a moment, you two are dead silent, staring at each other, with only the sound of your soft pants and the popping of fireworks in the background to fill the silence.
Soobin is the one who breaks the silence first, smiling sheepishly as he rubs the nape of his neck. βTo be honest, Iβveβ¦ Iβve been wanting to do that for a while.β
Your eyes are as wide as saucers, and you can feel your jaw go slack in shock. Soobin had been wanting to kiss you. Soobin has thought about kissing you. Your best friend Soobin wanted to kiss you.
βWhy didnβt you?β You reply without thinking, but really, you know very well exactly why heβs never done it. Heβs your best friend, always has been, and heβd be doing much more than fucking up your friendship by kissing you before you two matched. Naturally, Soobin leaves that question unanswered, posing a question of his own instead.
βWhat made you match with me?β
βWellβ¦β You donβt know what to say. You donβt want to rattle off a list of qualities that make him desirableβ youβre already feeling flustered enough after he kissed you like that, and youβre not looking to inflate his stupid ego or risk being the butt of his teasing. But you want to be honest with him. You donβt want him thinking his suppressed desire has been one-sided all this time.
βI guess Iβve always wondered what it would be like to go on a date with you. We wouldnβt be bored, we would know how to keep each other happy, and understand each other, that kind of thingβ¦ and I was a little tired of seeing you go through all those people you didnβt click with, who didnβt get you, especially not the way I did. You know Iβve never liked the people you were seeing, and I was always annoyed by the idiots you dated in high school, and all your stupid matchesβ¦ I always thought everyone took you for granted, and no one seemed to care about actually getting to know you. I thought I was just looking out for you, caring about you, as your best friend, but maybe I was actually just jealous.β
βJealous? Really?β He looks so incredulous it embarrasses you that you have to clarify further.Β
βYes, jealousβ¦ I especially hated whatβs-her-name, Hyeji? That one student council girl who dumped you in front of the whole school.β
Soobin grimaces at the mention of her name, and you canβt help the relief you feel at his response. βUgh, her. Led me on for months because she thought I was cute and then when we started dating she nitpicked every single thing I did, all because I wasnβt the suave drama lead of her dreams and then dumped me because she couldnβt change me. You know she threw away a whole pack of my Pokemon cards because she thought it was βtoo nerdyβ?β
βSee? This is what I mean. None of your romantic partners actually seem to appreciate you as you are. And so I donβt know, something came over me, and I wanted to see if I could do a good job because IΒ know I appreciate you for who you are and now Iβm confused, and I feel like Iβve ruined our friendship forever, andββ
To your relief, Soobin doesnβt laughβ instead he cuts your rambling off with a quick kiss, and it flusters you into silence. βShh. We promised, remember?β
βI mean, we also promised each other when we were in high school that weβd settle down and raise ten dogs on a farm together.β
Soobin laughs this time. βYeah, I remember that. But this is a pinky promise, isnβt it? Itβs different.β
βYouβre rightβ¦ but itβs scary, you know? Coming to this realization about you, and thinking about you this way, and enjoying it, but also worrying about how weβre going to get out of this after our relationship expires... I donβt want to get too carried away and change our dynamic forever.β Youβre chewing the skin off your lower lip nervously (you never did break that habit, so now your lip is bleeding), and, while Soobinβs voice is gentle, you know him well enough to detect the subtle tremor as he speaks.
βI know. But weβll be okay. Weβll figure it out. I wonβt let anything remove you from my life for good. Especially not the watch.β His voice is so low, so quiet, youβd miss it if you werenβt fixated on him, as if heβs trying to convince himself, and you squeeze his hand in what you hope is an admirable attempt at reassuring him. βThe app hasnβt told us our connectionβs expired yet, so I just really, really want to give this a chance. A proper chance, so I can say I did it before I get matched with my βrealβ soulmate, or whatever. I donβt want to think about what could have been, especially not with you. I think thatβd be worse for us.β
You know exactly what he means. Harboring dormant feelings for your best friend never bodes well, at least not in the movies and the books, so you may as well get this pining out of your system, and let it become a distant memory as soon as possible, if itβs not meant to be. Itβs only fair, for both of your futures, and for your friendship. (and though neither of you want to admit it, the thought of not being each otherβs soulmates is depressing.)
βLook, Soobβ¦ I really want to give this a chance, too. I want to see where it takes us while weβre allowed to. I want to try. Itβs scary, itβs fucking terrifying, but youβre my best friend, Soob. I promise you wonβt lose me because of some stupid watch. Pinky promise.β You try to keep your voice upbeat as you hold out your pinky towards him, offering a tender smile. He links his pinky with yours, and you can see his frame visibly relax once he does.Β
You rest your head on his shoulder, pinkies still linked, and silently hope that youβll be able to uphold your promise to him. Youβve never been any good with breakups. Soobin knows that.
But youβll be okay with him, right?
Heβs your best friend, after all.
[How would you rate your date?]
[β β β β β ]
β¦
Congratulations! Your next date is scheduled for 2pm tomorrow, at the Botanical Gardens.
Soobin decided on his own that heβs picking you up for the third date, and he let you know as much.Β After last nightβs events though, this means that youβre turning your entire closet upside down trying to find the sweet spot for your look today, because your head is jumbled with far too many thoughts, all of them about Soobin. Every outfit you think up is either too dressy, or too casual, or too out there, or too bland, and you have half a mind to reschedule with your mind in the state that it is. Unfortunately for you, Soobin is already on his way, and youβre not the type of asshole to tell him to head back home and forget the whole date, so you just stare at your pile of clothes on the floor, hoping that somehow youβll be enlightened with the perfect outfit idea and get yourself looking presentable before he comes knocking.
The universe is clearly not on your side, though, because your doorbell rings not even a minute later, and all youβve picked out is your jeans and youβre still very much topless. You shoot a message to Soobin, thumbs flying frantically as you let him know youβre not quite ready yetβ he might be your best friend in the entire world, but youβre not ready for him to see you under your clothes just yet, especially now that youβre properly seeing each other.
Youβre still not sure what to wear, but you figure a beige knit sweater should be safeβ you wonβt look like youβre trying too hard, but you also wonβt look like youβre not trying at all. When you swing the door open to finally greet Soobin, your breath quite literally gets taken away, because he trips and almost knocks you over with his lanky frame, but also, heβs breathtaking.
Heβs clearly put a lot of thought into his outfit, which is very cute, and he looks absolutely stunning. A sleek black cardigan with white striped accents on the sleeve, a white dress shirt that clearly looks freshly pressedβ hell, heβs even wearing a tieβ and those godforsaken glasses that have you in a chokehold somehow. You donβt even bother hiding your delightβ heβs so beautiful, and you know he needs a little validation after he probably spent hours putting his look together.
He catches you staring wordlessly, and he flushes with embarrassment.βWhat? Too much? I knew I should have skipped on the tieββ He grumbles, making a move to loosen it, but heβs stopped by your hand over his.
βNo. You look great, Soob. Seriously.β Youβre not used to being verbally affectionate, especially not with him, but when he looks that sad, like a kicked puppy, you know better than to tease him when heβs unsure of himself. Despite that, youβre still shy as you reassure him. βYou look beautiful.β
The way he brightens when he hears your words is almost cartoonish, and this time, you canβt hold back your laughter, which earns a pout from him, which in turn only fuels your laughter further. You appease him by lacing your fingers with his (heβs apparently a lot easier to please than you remember, but maybe thatβs your imagination), and he responds by placing a kiss to the back of your hand. The gesture is tender and sweet, and you think about what itβd be like to have Soobin do that to you every day.
βWell, shall we?β He bows exaggeratedly with his free arm, giving you a blinding smile.
You mirror his smile, and playfully curtsy in return. βWe shall.β
When you two arrive at the botanical gardens, itβs jam-packed with people (a worker explains that their tulips are in full bloom, so everyoneβs vying for their social media moment), and Soobin is visibly startled, though he recovers quickly as he turns to you.Β
βYou okay? Thereβs so many people... I think this is twice, maybe even thrice as many people as there were at the night market.β You donβt do well with crowds, the crowd at the night market was probably the most you could handle, but you know that you donβt have a choiceβ you have to follow through with the date as scheduled, or risk a fine that neither of you can afford, so you just nod, your grip on his hand tightening.Β
Soobin somehow finds a slightly less crowded area of the tulip fields for you two to stroll in after doing a quick sweep (thank god for his height, and that he uses it to his advantage), but you still feel tense as you walk hand in hand. Thereβs still a decent amount of people, with more spilling in excitedly, phone cameras in hand, and you have a bad feeling the crowd will only grow in size as the day drags on. You just hope youβre as convincing an actress as you think you are, and that Soobin wonβt notice as he reads the identification cards for each flower.
Youβre caught off guard when he gently pushes you down onto a nearby bench, and crouches in front of you, clasping your other hand in his so that both of them are occupied. The concerned expression on his face tells you that youβre nowhere near an Oscar for your performance, and that heβs most definitely caught on to your discomfort. Normally youβd be embarrassed at the displayβ you hate making a scene in public, but your anxiety is getting the better of you, and itβs nice to know that he still knows you as well as you thought.
βNoonaβ¦ look. I know you donβt like crowds, especially excitable and hectic ones like these. If you really, really feel like this is too much for you, we can cancel the date and go home. I want you to have a good time, and I know itβs hard for you when thereβs so many people.β
Youβre chewing at your lower lip again, and Soobin lets go of one of your hands to thumb at your lip to stop you before you tear it open with your teeth. βBut Soob, we came all this way. And you dressed so nicely for me, for this date, and I spent all this time wanting to look good for you, and spend time with youβ¦β You trail off when your breath catches in your throat, your chin trembling as your eyes well up. βItβd be such a waste to cancel after all our time and effort.β
Once again Soobinβs thumb is gently swiping over your cheeks when the tears finally spill over, hushing you with the soft sincerity that heβs prone to when heβs not teasing you.Β
βHey, heyβ¦ we can reschedule for another day, canβt we? We donβt have to do this, noona. Thereβs always next time. It wonβt be a waste, I promise.β You feel so apologetic you could die. Soobinβs being so patient and sweet and understanding with you and here you are, kicking up a fuss. The least you could do is power through and follow through with your scheduled date, and youβd hate to miss out on this time with him that youβve been looking forward to. You were excited for this date, and you want him to know that.
βI think Iβd feel worse if we cancelled after we went through all this trouble, and especially if it was all because of meβ¦ just give me a moment to calm myself down.β Soobin nods in response, cradling your cheek in his palm, and you sigh appreciatively at the tender gesture. He doesnβt say anything as you wipe away the remnants of your tears and blow your noseβ he just holds your hand, letting you gather yourself, and you think for a moment that this must be the benefit of falling for your best friend.
Once the tears have finally subsided, and youβve had a moment to calm your nerves, you meet Soobinβs eyes, which are searching yours, as if scanning for any lingering signs of discomfort. When he canβt find any, and you give him a reassuring look and a grateful smile, he seizes the opportunity to steal a peck from your lips, grinning cheekily with his tongue between his teeth when he pulls away.Β
βH-hey! What was that for?!β Your shock and surprise is real, but your indignance certainly isnβt, if your rosy cheeks are any indication. Your discomfort is forgotten, at least temporarily, so youβre glad for that.
βOhβ¦ just because. You liked it, though.β Heβs so smug, that stupid asshole, but heβs right, so you pull him in for another quick kiss before you try to make a run for it. Unfortunately for your escape plan, youβve forgotten that your hand is still very much interlocked with his, and heβs significantly stronger than you, so he easily pulls you back into his embrace. You canβt say you mind, thoughβ heβs warm and he smells good, like jasmine and sandalwood and the faint scent of vanilla, and if you werenβt already so flustered youβd bury your face in his broad chest.
βFeeling better now?β The words fall from Soobinβs lips with a teasing lilt, but you know itβs his way of genuinely checking in on you, so you answer sincerely.
βMuch better. Though Iβd still like to avoid the crowds and find somewhere else to have our dateβ¦ if you donβt mind? The tulips are pretty, and as much as I would like to admire them too, thereβs just so many people fighting for a good photoβ¦βΒ
βOf course, I get it. I saw a sign pointing to a field of azaleas over there that is probably getting a lot less foot traffic than the tulips, so we could head over there?β He gestures in the opposite direction of the tulip field, and youβre more than happy to oblige, letting him tug you along.
Thankfully Soobinβs guess is correct, because thereβs only a handful of people at the azalea field when you two arrive, and the tension in your shoulders finally lets up. The dainty red and pink flowers have their own quaint charm, and theyβre vibrant and eye-catching. You crouch down to get a closer look, taking hold of a delicate petal in between the pads of your fingers to admire them.
βDid you know red and pink azaleas represent love and romance? Roses arenβt the only flower of love like everyone seems to think.β Soobinβs deep voice rings in your ear and you startle a little, partially because heβs way closer to you than you expected (itβs going to be a while before you get used to maintaining close proximity with him) and partially because you had no idea Soobin was just casually carrying the knowledge of flower meanings in that pretty head of his.
βTheyβre so prettyβ¦ theyβd make a much more unique gift than roses for special occasions, too. Not that thereβs anything wrong with roses, but theyβre kind of done to death, donβt you think?β
Instead of answering, Soobin looks both ways, then plucks a flower, and you hiss in disapproval at him. βHeyβ! What are you doing? The sign says that we canβt pick the flowers!β Luckily, none of the staff has taken notice of his mischievous little act, but even if they did, you canβt help but wonder if theyβd even care, when he could charm his way into anything.
Soobin tucks the flower behind your ear, seemingly ignoring your disapproval as he hums a tune under his breath. βA gift for our special occasion, and a little commemoration of our budding romance, or something. And look, noona, youβre so pretty. Just like a flower.β He punctuates his statement with the sound of his phone camera flashing, followed by four more, until youβre blushing profusely with embarrassment.
βSoobin, thatβs enoughββ Your cheeks are beet redβ you can feel it from the sheer amount of blood running into themβ and though you really like that Soobinβs taking pictures of you for him to keep, youβre extremely camera shy, and he knows that, which is probably why heβs so insistent.
βActually, the issue is that I didnβt take enough. Now smile for the camera!β You have to practically wrestle your way away from the camera, but not before he snaps a few more of you smiling bashfully at him. He catches up to you with ease (damn those long legs of his), arms secure around your frame as you squeal, though youβre secretly pleased that youβre in his hold.
The time once again ticks by like nothing as you walk side by side, admiring the blooms around you and snapping photos of each other (βFor wallpaper usage purposes,β Soobin says, and you blush again), and before you know it, your watches are beeping to signify that your two hours are up. Soobin sobers up almost immediately, expression unreadable, and though he doesnβt say anything as he takes your hand, you know whatβs on his mind, because the same thing is on yours.
Thereβs a palpable tension hanging in the air once the two of you reach the entrance of the gardensβ itβs the third date, after all, and you promised youβd find out your expiration date if you made it this far. Youβre relieved that your watches havenβt blared just yet, signifying the end of your connection, but youβre still struck with the nervousness of finding out how long youβll last. You think youβll never get over it if you only get a few monthsβ or worse, a few days with himβ after all this secret pining and yearning.
If you didnβt know any better, youβd think Soobin was somehow eerily calm about the whole thing. But you do know better, and you know that heβs just trying to put on a brave face for you, and for himself. The two of you open Time to Love in silence, hands still interlocked, swiping to the βLove Countdownβ tab with your free hands, and brace yourselves. Soobin gives you a reassuring nod, and you respond back with what you hope is an equally reassuring smile, and that your expression doesnβt betray the fear bubbling deep within you.
Soobin takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. βOkay, on the count of three,β
βOneβ¦β
βTwoβ¦β
βThree!β
When both of you tap the in-app tab, there isnβt an array of numbers indicating an expiration date with a ticking countdown, as you expected and had grown accustomed to on your previous datesβ in fact, there isnβt a single number on the screenβ and instead thereβs an infinity sign.
You two donβt have an expiration date.
You and Soobin look at each other, then at your watches, then at each other again.Β
βWait, we donβt have an expiration dateββ
Then the realization dawns on both of you, and it hits you like a truck.
βWait, weβre soulmates?!β
Both of you are sporting the same bewildered expression, and you both go to check your progress bars, just to be sureβ theyβre full, just as youβd expect after being matched with your soulmate. So thatβs why your watch alarms havenβt gone off. You two were the one in a million. Once the shock finally wears off, itβs replaced with pure, unbridled joy, and when Soobin sweeps you off your feet to gather you in his arms, thereβs an emotion bubbling in you thatβs equal parts unfamiliar and yet welcome.
Youβd thought all this time, all these years, that there was no way you should feel this way about your best friend, of all people. That you shouldnβt fuck this up, because Soobin has always been there for you, and youβve always been there for him. As his friend. As your friend.Β
But here is the universe, telling you that youβre fated to love him, and that heβs fated to love you in return.Β
And love him you do. You love Soobin. And when you look at him, and see the way heβs looking at you, with fondness practically dripping from his gaze, you know he loves you too.Β
Maybe the watch really is bullshit. Maybe it is statistically impossible to decide someoneβs life partner based on an algorithm.
But maybe itβs onto something, because it seems silly to have ever thought of being with anyone except Soobin. You never wouldβve thought to look for your forever right next to you, and yet, here he is, in the flesh. Was it a coincidence that he made it onto your recommended matches that fateful night? Was it a coincidence that he felt the same way you did?
Soobinβs lips capture yours in a searing kiss, and you melt in his heat, kissing him back with a fierce fervor, as if desperately communicating the depth of the feelings youβve let build up silently after all these years. You decide that thereβs no such thing as coincidencesβ heβs always known whatβs best for you, and youβve always wanted whatβs best for him. You just didnβt know that the answer to both of those things was each other.
βI love you, noona.β He whispers with a bashful, dimpled smile, and your heart swells.
βI love you too, Soob.β
Soobin has always been counting down to something.Β
To the end of another grueling workday, the next League of Legends patch update, to anything, so he always has something to look forward to. But heβs never looked forward to this.
The love countdown has always been something he despised and dreadedβ heβs always wanted to be the master of his own fate, without the shackles of the app tying him down with each new connection. Heβd always thought that his soulmate would be some poorly matched individual who heβd have a mediocre life with, but all that seems to be proven wrong as he looks at you.
He hates being wrong. But when he sees the way you smile, the way you regard him with the utmost love and affection in your gaze, the way you hold his hand as if youβll lose him if you let goβ he thinks heβs willing to concede defeat, at least this time.
Maybe that stupid watch does know a thing or two about love. Maybe it doesnβt. Maybe this is all just pure coincidence. But despite it all, Soobin is thankful that this is where he ends up. That both of you had been counting down all this time to each other.Β
If there's anyone he can count on in this world, it's you.
summary: in a world where love is given an expiration date, you find your forever home in an unexpected place.
word count: 10.1k
tags: soulmate!au, best friends to lovers, mostly romance + fluff, fake dating if you squint, reader is afab w/ gender neutral pronouns + fem terms (noona) used
author's note: finally got around to finishing this... it's been a long while coming and i couldn't get myself to write for various reasons and i'm so happy it's all done and out there! hope you enjoy and wishing everyone a wonderful holiday season <3
For as long as Soobin can remember, heβs been counting down the days.Β
To summer vacation, to the end of his shift at his part time job, to the start of a long awaited trip, to anything. But thereβs something else that counts down on his behalf, something that he doesnβt particularly want to count.
That something is inlaid in a nondescript watch wrapped around his wrist. Everyone gets one once they turn 18, and as far as heβs concerned, its only purpose is to ruin relationships. The cruel hands of time assign a βbest byβ date to each romantic encounter, flashing on the screen from the first meeting, with each failure promising to lead the user closer and closer to their fated lover. If you ask Soobin, itβs all bullshit. How would a stupid watch know anything about fate, anyways?
Itβs a typical Thursday night, and Soobinβs mindlessly scrolling through Time to Love, the government mandated dating app that all phones come with, as per usual when he canβt decide on something to watch. He has yet to meet the weekly two date quota, having only gone on one on Tuesday (important to note that heβs already forgotten his name), and heβs running out of time, and he really canβt afford to pay that 100,000 won fine this week. Well, he canβt afford to pay it at any point in time, but this weekβs been especially rough on him, and he doesnβt want to shell out any more of his meager savings just because he couldnβt get a date, of all things.Β
The names and faces on his phone screen are a blur as his thumb swipes left aimlesslyβ he doesnβt really give that much of a shit who he ends up with, because at the end of the day, heβll say βNoβ when the app asks him if heβd liked them and give them a terrible review saying they were incompatible, because frankly, the algorithm seems to always be wrong when it comes to his matches. Either that, or itβs because he cares so little that he doesnβt bother properly vetting his matches.
Heβs resigned himself to his fate anyways; heβll fill up his progress bar with a bunch of shitty matches until the algorithm decides itβs time for him to settle down, then when he finds his βsoulmateβ (if you could even call it that), heβll just be doomed to a loveless arranged marriage set in place by a computer and die unhappy. He canβt envision happiness ever coming out of something so lifeless, so cold, so thatβs just how it has to be. At least it gives him something to do instead of rewatching the same three anime series over and over again.
Whateverβ heβll just swipe right on the next person and go on yet another unmemorable date tomorrow. Lee Saerom, the profile reads. Sheβs exceptionally pretty, he has to admit, and sheβs an artist, (and sheβs older, but donβt ask him about that) so heβll just ask her about her work and let her ramble for the allotted two hours while he smiles and nods.
He swipes right, and a bright pink heart pattern fills his screen, signifying a successful match. Obnoxious. Itβs replaced with a time and a place, and he lets out a groan. Congratulations! Your date is scheduled for 6pm, at the Coffee Shop. He was supposed to meet you at 7 tomorrow for your usual Friday night updates.Β
Fuck. What if the date goes on longer than an hour?
Heβs never been late for your weekly meetups, but he figures youβll understand, since itβs completely out of his control.
Surely you wonβt kill him, right?
Just in case, he recites a prayer to himself before he tucks in for the night.
Youβre already nursing your third vodka soda of the night and Soobin is still nowhere to be found, which is unusual. Heβs never been the most punctual person, but standing you up for an hour after your usual meeting time isnβt like him, either. He said heβd be late, but he didnβt specify how lateβ¦ youβll grill him later when he explains himself, and youβll make him buy you a drink or two as compensation. With the comfort of a free drink in mind, youβre about to order your fourth round when Soobin finally stumbles in through the door of the bar, eyes scanning each booth until his gaze lands on you, and with an apologetic smile, heβs sliding into the seat across from you.Β
He gestures to your glass, brow curled upwards, which you know means heβs teasing you. βWhat number is this one, noona? You always polish these things off like theyβre nothing.β
βThis is number three, with number four on the way, and thatβs because they are. You owe me at least two for taking so long to get here, asshole.β You let out an indignant huff as you slurp the last of the cocktail through your straw, lips jutting in a comical pout.
βOkay, okay. Next oneβs on me.β Soobin relents with an endeared laugh, waving down the waitstaff and ordering a beer for himself, along with another vodka soda for you.Β
βOkay, now spill.β
βWhat? Am I supposed to have some hot gossip for you? Donβt make me guess about what drama Iβve somehow found myself in on accident.β Heβs visibly confused, brows knitted together, and you roll your eyes at him.
βObviously the only reason you would ever skip out on your dear noona was if TTL scheduled you for a date during our usual time, so spill. How bad was this one?βΒ
His lips part in understanding, (you can practically see the figurative lightbulb flickering on) head bobbing in an exaggerated nod before pulling his phone out, hand outstretched to show you his dateβs profile. βI mean, she was okay, I guess. Pretty girl, and she was older, but she spent the entirety of our time slot babbling about her latest art project and how itβs supposedly going to blow away the industry. Which is fine, I guess, because you know I hate talking on these dates, but if she said βbrush techniqueβ and βnegative spaceβ one more time I think I wouldβve tried to drown myself in my caffe mocha. The app thought so too, I guess, because when we checked our expiration date, it was exactly an hour from the start time, so itβs not like I missed out on my forever soulmate or whatever.β
Each TTL date is scheduled for an arbitrary amount of time, depending on your expiration date, which is determined from the first moment you meetβ sometimes itβs just a few minutes, an hour or two, and anything longer than 24 hours is given a two hour time slot maximum. Thereβs supposedly an extremely rare case where you arenβt given an expiration date from the get go, regardless of your progress, meaning that youβve found your soulmate by sheer luck, but itβs almost unheard ofβ most people donβt find their soulmates until theyβve completely filled up their bars, something about needing ample data to calculate optimal compatibility.
You ogle at his phone screen for a bitβ she really was stunningβ then guffaw at the thought of Soobin nodding halfheartedly, listening to a pretty girl talk his ear off, when most men would probably kill to be in his position. βDamn, if even an older woman that pretty canβt hold your attention, and the app confirms that, you know itβs badβ¦ So, where does that put your progress at? Werenβt you at like, 80% last week?β
Soobinβs face practically scrunches in on itself at your remark, tapping the app once more to check his updated progress bar. βIβm going to ignore that. Iβm atβ¦ 88% after I reviewed Saerom and that guy from earlier in the week. Guess it wasnβt a total waste if I got 8% closer to completion. What are you at now?β
You lift your phone to open TTL, your progress bar only having inched 2% closer to completion after your date yesterday. β75% now. I think the algorithm is personally fucking me over, or something. My last few matches have been nice enough, but I cannot keep up with their energy. Itβs wringing me dry. I must be the only person in the entire world who doesnβt want a golden retriever for a partner. My date yesterday just about knocked me out for good, he was that energetic.β
βTell me about it,β Soobin commiserates. βIβve very clearly expressed my distaste for bubbly and talkative people who probably peaked in high school, but thatβs all theyβre spitting out in my for you page. No offense to them, I donβt think Iβve met any straight up assholes since that one girl back in June, but itβs like the app is purposely recommending the most incompatible people to meβ wait, yesterday? And I didnβt hear about this?β
You give him a pointed look, silently conveying that he also didnβt inform you of his date today until ten minutes ago. He gets the message and holds his hands up in defeat, then gestures for you to speak, dimples peeking out as he purses his lips. You sigh, rubbing your temples as you recall the most chaotic two hours of the week, maybe even your life.
βOkay, lookβ¦ for the record, he was very nice to me, a perfect gentleman, but my god, could that guy talk. He was practically falling at his knees trying to impress me, which wouldβve earned him a few points in my book, but his mouth was moving maybe five miles a minute at all times without a moment of rest. It was like watching a child hopped up on sugar, to be honest. He talked for forty whole minutes nonstop about pizza. Donβt even get me started on how passionate he was about his workout routine.β
Your drinks finally come around, and Soobin hands you your frosted glass, which you gratefully take a long sip out of before continuing. βAnd before you say anything, no, he was nothing like Kai. Also, Kai is literally like my child, and just because I babysat him all those years does not mean I want to date someone like him.β
Soobin parts his lips to respond, then scrunches his nose in distaste as you take the words right of his mouth, opting to down his drink instead. βYouβre no fun.β
βBut thatβs why you love me, right?β
βSure, noona, sure.β
βThatβs it, asshole, you owe me another drink.β
Sunday rolls around, which means youβve got to start scoping out this weekβs datesβ you hate leaving anything to the last minute, and you like to leave the end of your week as free as possible (no one is prying your precious rest time from you, not even a beautiful person with the worldβs best personality).Β
Which means youβre mindlessly swiping through a sea of profiles, hoping you find someone thatβs at least remotely interesting. Youβre prepared for a long night of doom scrolling, but you stop cold in your tracks as you come across a familiar name and face, and a lump forms in your throat.
Choi Soobin.
The algorithm is really fucking with you now. It has to be. Youβve never once even considered your best friend as a potential suitor, not because he isnβt insanely attractive and charming (and funny, and easy to talk to, andβ¦), but because heβs your best friend. Youβve known him for so long, youβve seen him cry when he couldnβt get the Pokemon card he wanted when he was young enough to need allowance to buy it, and heβs seen you for long enough to know you threw the nastiest toddler tantrums over being denied an ice cream purchaseβ the point is that you know him a little too well, and you know from experience that thatβs not always ideal in romance.Β
But you have been having terrible luck with your matches for so long, and two hours of Soobinβs undivided attention doesnβt seem so bad, and it would be a good time, at leastβ¦
You kick yourself mentally for even thinking of it. Heβs your best friend, for godβs sake.
Yet your thumb continues to hover over his profile, quivering as you make the motion to swipe right on him without touching the screen. The guilt and the risk of maybe ruining your friendship forever clearly isnβt enough to stop you from considering him.Β
The gentle, familiar smile that heβs sporting in his profile picture pierces your heart, and youβre not sure why. Maybe youβve always had a thing for him unconsciously, maybe you just want someone who actually gets you, maybe youβre just running out of options. Or maybe youβre just tired of chasing after something you know is futile, and you want to take a chance on something, on someone, that might actually be good for you. On someone that you know would be good to you, and for you.
And so, with bated breath, you swipe right.
[Time to Love: Y/N has liked you! Open the app for more details.]
To say Soobin is struck with disbelief would be an understatement. Heβs practically gaping at his phone, and he knows youβd be laughing your ass off and making fun of him if you could see him. But itβs precisely that typical flippant attitude of yours thatβs got him perplexed about this development.
Heβd be lying if he said heβs never once thought of you that wayβ heβs always thought you were pretty and kind hearted, despite your temper, and youβve always been there for him, through thick and thin, even when he was being kind of a dick. That definitely counts for something. But heβs never thought about crossing that boundary, because 1) heβs not allowed to pursue anyone he doesnβt match with through the app anyways, and 2) matching with you could make or break your bond forever (heβs leaning towards break, though, because like he said, the watch is bullshit). In short, heβs a fucking coward and a little too cynical for his own good.Β
But here it is, an opportunity for a date with you, in all its glory, and initiated by you, no less. He should be celebrating, or at least hyped up, because maybe itβll all work out, maybe this is the solution to all his lukewarm matches over the last few months, but instead heβs downright terrified. Thereβs absolutely no way that you both come out of this unscathed. Thereβs no such thing as a perfect forever if itβs decided by a computer. There canβt possibly be a happy ending at the end of this road.
He shakes his head, as if it would clear his head of the panicked thoughts. Youβre still his best friend, at the end of the day, he tells himself, and heβs sure that youβll fight just as hard as he will to keep him in your life. So he holds onto the tiniest sliver of hope that somehow your relationship doesnβt crash and burn spectacularly, opens the app, and swipes right on you.
Congratulations! Your date is scheduled for 3pm, at the Aquarium.Β
A new notification pops up. Soobinβs heart stirs.
y/n noona: see you tomorrow β₯οΈ
He feels guilty as a wave of excitement washes over him. He shouldnβt be feeling like this. Youβre his best friend. His dear noona. He may as well be signing away your friendship for good. But itβd be worse if he didnβt match your enthusiasm.
soob: yup, see you tomorrow noona :]
Itβs only 5 minutes past the scheduled meeting time, and already Soobinβs panicking that youβve changed your mind and cancelled on him, writing this off as a mistake. Heβs trying his very best to remain nonchalant, itβs just a date with his best friend, who he might have a sapling of a crush on, no big deal, right? Or maybe it is for the best if you cancel, then heβd have one less crippling fear to worry about.
Heβs rethinking his outfit for the umpteenth timeβ he didnβt want to look like he was trying too hard, not in front of you because youβd probably think it was silly, but he also doesnβt want you thinking he shows up to dates looking like a slob. (For the record, he thinks heβs got a decent sense of fashion. Heβs better than Kai, at least, though that isnβt saying much.) Heβs internally debating if he shouldβve gone with the navy polo shirt instead of the grey cardigan draped over his shoulders, or if he shouldβve gone with the black slacks instead of the light wash jeans, but his jumbled thoughts dissipate as you tap on his shoulder, shit-eating grin and all.Β
βWhatβs with you, Soob? You look like the fate of the universe depends on you, and you only have 5 minutes to save all of humanity.β You tease, nudging your shoulder against his. Oh, if only you knew what was really weighing on him.
He has half a mind to swat your shoulder, but heβs a little too aware that the two of you are supposed to be on a date, so instead he shoves his hands into his pockets. To his surprise, youβre more dressed up than usual, (heβs used to seeing you exclusively in oversized hoodies) andβ wait, you two are practically matching, from the grey cardigan, light wash jeans, all the way down to the white sneakers. The only difference is that youβve buttoned up your cardigan so that it functions more as a blouse, but you two clearly have definitely mastered the art of accidental couple looks.
βOkay, awkwardβ¦ one of us has to change.β He teases in an attempt to ease his own racing mind, dimples peeking out as he stifles a laugh. You let out an indignant huff, pushing his massive frame with no success. He doesnβt even budge.
βNot my fault that youβre trying to steal my look. I wore it better, by the way,β You retort, but truth be told, youβre reeling at the sight of him. Youβve only ever seen him in his stuffy work attire and the worn-out, faded shirts he refuses to throw out, and seeing him in a comparably softer, more preppy look is making you see him with new eyes.
You shake your head, as if doing so will reset your perspective to factory settings and make you see him as just your best friend again. (spoiler alert: it doesnβt. Soobin is still handsome and he looks very cute, and youβre still very much affected by it.) βOkay, so. First things first. Should we check our apps? To see if, like, weβre compatible, or I donβt know.β Your voice is stiff, like youβre buffering, and you donβt think youβve ever been this awkward around Soobin, at least not since the day you met.
Soobin turns up his nose in disagreement and covers his watch screen and yours. βNah, thatβs bullshit. Itβs already all decided, isnβt it? Itβs been decided from the second we stepped into the aquarium. No point in checking now, we should decide for ourselves if this is something we want to pursue, instead of letting some computer dictate that. When itβs over, itβs over, and we can just go back to being friends, right?β
βWell, I think itβs probably better to know when to give this a rest, instead of constantly wondering if my best friend is set to be my long-term romantic partner, or whatever.β You had a point. But a part of Soobin didnβt feel ready to face the fact that you might not want to see him again like this. A much smaller part of him is still fearful that you two might not be able to turn back from this.
βOkay, okay, fine. We can check itβbut not now. If we make it to a third date, then we can check how long we have. But you have to be honest and not touch it whatsoever.β Soobin doesnβt make any move to mention that he isnβt interested in seeing you again, but you donβt want to just assume that heβs into you, so you test the waters.
βOkay, I promise to be honest. But why the third date? Are you really that keen on seeing me?β Youβre trying to be teasing, but you feel more desperate than anything.
Soobin doesnβt answer for a moment, and you think that youβve said the wrong thing. Just as youβre about to apologize, he replies, βIf we make it to a third dateβ¦ then Iβll know whether weβre actually giving this a proper shot and not just for shits and giggles or as an escape from our other failed connections.β
His sincerity both surprises and flatters you, and you canβt tell if youβre supposed to be frozen in shock or hugging him, or a secret third thing, so you just stay still, absently fiddling with your fingers.
When you look up again, Soobinβs holding out his hand, and you look at him with obvious confusion. Rolling his eyes, he takes your hand in his, lips pursed into a thin line. You want to make some clever jab at him, but his hands are warm and soft and they practically swallow up your much smaller ones, and youβre filled with a wash of emotions so intense that you canβt muster up the strength to retort.
Soobin notices that youβre still visibly perplexed, and he mutters. βWeβre on a date, you know. Weβve got to act the part.β Itβs a half truth at best; he does want to give this date a proper chance, but selfishly, he really just wants to hold your hand for two hours. If you catch onto his white lie, you donβt show it, but he doesnβt miss the rosy hue that colors your cheeks as you nod.
Heβs right, you thinkβ it is a date, and youβre the one who swiped on him first, so the least you can do is treat him like a possible suitor and not just your best friend. He deserves that much, at least, and you need to know whether this bundle of butterflies in your stomach is a passing feeling or a dull ache youβve forgotten about, so you let him lead you into the dimly lit array of fish tanks.
Youβre noticing a lot of things about Soobin.
You notice that Soobinβs eyes practically twinkle when he gets excited. Itβs never been something youβve taken note of, but you canβt help but notice it now, every time he points out a species of fish he recognizes. Itβs cute. Youβre not sure if youβre supposed to find your best friend cute, but you do.
You notice how his comically long fingers slot in between yours, and youβre really starting to like how it feels, though youβd die of embarrassment if you admitted as much.Β
Not to mention heβs an absolutely perfect gentleman. Heβs constantly asking you if you want something to eat, if youβre tired, if youβre cold, and you let him know that youβre fine each time. When you accidentally pull apart your shoelaces, heβs quick to kneel down and tie them up for you. When he stops to grab himself a bottle of juice, he offers one to you, too.
Had Soobin always been this pretty? So cute? And so sweet? How had you never taken notice of him like this all these years? (You know the answer to that, but youβre still surprised at what youβre noticing nonetheless.)
Soobin catches you staring at him while youβre both supposed to be looking at a school of clownfish, and you expect him to make some egotistical joke at your expense, but instead he gives you a warm smile, eyes crinkling into crescents, and god dammit to hell, you melt.Β
The two hours pass by like nothing, and unlike your past few dates, youβre dreading the end of it, and you wish that the beep signifying itβs over would never come. To your disappointment, he releases your hand as you approach the entrance, and your hand is already missing his warmth. You turn to face him; well, not really, because you canβt bear to make eye contact with him, not when you spent the better part of two hours shamelessly ogling at him.
His voice cuts in between the thoughts rattling around in your head, and he sounds so apprehensive that it worries you. βCan I ask you something? No, wait, can you promise me something?β
You know how seriously Soobin takes his promises, so youβre a little scared for what heβs going to say next, but you nod anyway.
βPromise me that if this doesnβt work out, weβll still be friends. Please.β The last word is so quiet that you almost miss it, and when you finally muster the courage to meet his gaze, heβs giving you a pleading look so earnestly that it breaks your heart a little.Β
βI promiseβ no, I pinky promise. Weβll be friends, no matter what.β
Since he was younger, Soobinβs held the belief that pinky promises are binding, and he knows that you know this, so you hold out your pinky, hoping that this can ease whatever worries he has on his mind.
You pinky promised. Soobin knows that itβs your unspoken way of assuring him (youβve never been the most verbally affectionate, anyways), a quiet way of letting him know that he means just as much to you as you do to him. He links pinkies with you to seal the promise, feeling just a little bit lighter as you both make your way to the subway station together, shoulders bumping all the while.
Soobin just really, really hopes that youβll be able to keep that promise.
[How would you rate your date?]
[β β β β β ]
Congratulations! Your next date is scheduled for 8pm tonight, at the Night Market.
You shouldnβt be surprised that your next date with Soobin comes so soonβ you still have your weekly quotas to meet, and the app always schedules dates within 24 hours of matching or a positive rating, but truth be told, your surprise is solely because you just donβt know how to face him. You two had made that pinky promise to stay friends regardless of the circumstances, but youβd also resolved to treat him like a potential suitor while you two are seeing each other, so where does that leave you?Β
Well, it leaves you in front of the closet with no idea what to wear. You want to look good (for Soobin, but youβre in denial at the moment), but itβs just a night market, and you know youβll never hear the end of it if Soobin catches on that you went through lengths just to impress him.
Speaking of the devil, your phone flickers on to reveal a text from him, and you scoff as you scan its contents.
y/n noona: soy/n noona: whatβs the deal with tonight
soob: aw, noona, do you want to see me again that badly? iβm excited, see you later tonight β₯οΈ
y/n noona: shut up, you clearly want to see me again too. donβt be late or iβm stealing your wallet laterΒ
y/n noona: also whatβs the dress code, are we matching again :p
soob: i mean, if you insistβ¦ π i knew you wanted me
y/n noona: nvm youβre getting me in a hoodie and my raggedy sweats with the hole in the knee, fuck you
soob: no no i take it back iβm sorryΒ
y/n noona: ok fine you get spared just this once
y/n noona: [IMG_3687.jpg]
y/n noona: final outfit check. if weβre going to be matching it will be your decision so choose wisely
soob: wait thatβs not fair
soob: noona come back
soob: DONβT LEAVE ME HANGING LIKE THIS
[y/n noona has βLikedβ your message]
soob: you are so mean to me
You let out a sigh of relief you didnβt know you were holding when Soobin arrives, clad in a blue flannel thatβs nearly identical to yours, black tee, beige cargos, and a black shoulder bag. Youβd been hoping he would follow through, and thereβs a small surge of pride at how youβll be walking around the market, hand in hand, in matching outfits, but thereβs something you hadnβt been counting on.
Heβs wearing his glasses.Β
Youβve always known that Soobin doesnβt have the best eyesight (heβs constantly squinting to see things, but so do you), but now that youβre seeing him in a new light, his usual black frames are suddenly the most attractive thing in the world, and you may as well be holding a neon sign that blares βI HEART NERDSβ for him to see.
You make a painfully pathetic attempt to mask your delight by waving at him with a grin, and thankfully Soobin doesnβt notice, or if he does, he doesnβt make any show of it, and instead he simply salutes at you with two fingers and cracks a grin. As he sidles up to you, his large hand slips into yours with a little too much ease, fingers immediately interlocking with yours, and it sends your head into a frenzy all over again. As if heβs aware that your mind is going haywire, Soobin leans down towards you, and for a second you think heβs going to kiss you.
Youβre frantically trying to make some motion to stop him, itβs so sudden and your cheeks are way too hot now, and heβs way too close, and your damn arms wonβt budgeβ
βI hope you came ready to eat. I came armed with a fuck load of cash because I am going to stuff myself silly with food, and I am not getting turned away by the βcash onlyβ booths.β Thereβs a fire of determination in Soobinβs eyes, paired with a wide grin, and you donβt know whether to be concerned for him or for yourself, but nonetheless, youβre a little relieved that you completely misread the situation. Before you can say anything in response, though, heβs dragging you towards the sweeping lines of booths, already making a beeline for some takoyaki.Β
The tray full of octopus balls in Soobinβs hands is steaming and they smell absolutely mouthwatering, and, in true Soobin fashion, he gets over excited and tries to pop the entire thing in his mouth in one go. He immediately regrets it, of course, because immediately heβs whining over the fact that his tongue is now most definitely burnt and numb from the piping hot orb of batter heβd just tried to scarf down. You might be finding him insanely attractive now, but heβs still as clumsy as ever, and you canβt stifle the laughter that bubbles in your throat at the sight.
βDumbassβ¦ you should know damn well that you shouldnβt put a whole takoyaki in your mouth like that.β You tease, snickering as he fans his tongue once he swallows.
βShut up! I couldnβt help myself!β He lets out a childish huff, stuffing another ball into his mouth with a comically exaggerated pout, and consequently huffing and puffing at the heat that blooms in his mouth once more. The whole display is undeniably adorable, and it takes all of the willpower you have to resist the burning desire to squish his cheeks.Β
The tray of takoyaki is polished off in no time, and a bowl of bingsu, a cup of fish cake soup, two sticks of tanghulu, a plate of sweet rice cakes, an ice cream cone, and a million other things you lost track of follow suit into the bottomless pit that seems to be Soobinβs stomach. He wasnβt kidding when he said he came ready to eatβ heβs plowing through the booths like itβs his last meal on Earth. Heβs gracious enough to offer you half of his portions, at least, so itβs not like heβs leaving you to starve. (youβd kill him if he did, though.) Once heβs had his fill, his lips curl up into a mischievous grin as he jabs his thumb in the direction of a different section of the market, one filled with countless games: target shooting, beanbag toss, dartsβ the row of booths seems to stretch on forever.Β
βOh, youβre on, Soob. Donβt think Iβm going easy on you because weβre on a date.β
βYeah? Donβt think Iβm going easy on you because youβre older.β
Contrary to both of your words, Soobin is absolutely fucking terrible at the beanbag toss, despite his long arms definitely giving him an advantage, and youβre no good at shooting or throwing and aiming at anything, really, so the two of you leave each booth with empty hands, though youβre laughing as if youβve hit the jackpot.
Even though you two fail spectacularly at every single game they have available, youβre suddenly aware of how much your cheeks hurt. From smiling. From laughing. When was the last time that happened on a date? Or ever, even?
Soobin ventures off on his own while youβre lost in thought, and he returns from his little solo adventure with yet another serving of tanghulu (the third one of the night: strawberry for him, tangerine for you this time). Youβre reaching out to grab the sweet from his outstretched hand, when suddenly you jump as loud popping sounds blare overhead. Thereβs a beat of silence before a flurry of colorful lights blooms in the sky, and your shoulders relax once you realize itβs just fireworks.
Youβre admiring the colors and shapes of the fireworks display as you crunch on your tanghulu, and youβre so enraptured you almost miss the feeling of someoneβs gaze on you. Almost.
When you turn to confirm your suspicions, youβre right, itβs Soobin whoβs staring at you, but heβs staring at you so intently, with such intensity, that you immediately grow flusteredβ heβs never looked at you like that beforeβ and youβre immensely thankful that the flashes of light in the sky mask the rosy hue thatβs surely staining your cheeks. Just when youβre about to swing your head away to focus your attention on the fireworks once more, his hand flies out to cradle your chin in his palm, keeping your gaze fixated on him.Β
Then heβs closing the distance, slowly but surely, fixated on you all the while to gauge your reaction, and even though youβre frozen in shock, you donβt think you wouldβve moved, anyways. Your eyes flutter shut at the last minute, nerves getting the better of you, until his lips brush against yours tentatively, as if heβs hesitating, holding back.
You meet his gaze once more, and neither of you say a word, you just nod in response to the pleading look in his eyes, as if asking your permission. He breaks out into the most beautiful smile, one that you wish you could snap a mental photo of and tuck away in a safe place in your mind, and then heβs kissing you. Actually kissing you.
He kisses you with such fervor, as if heβs been wanting to do this his whole life, and you canβt help the way you practically melt in his hold, pressing yourself against his broad figure. The fireworks display is all but forgotten, the only thing on either of your minds being the way your lips meld into each other, and the way your hands clasp together.
Soobinβs in a daze when you two finally break away for a much-needed breath, and youβre sure you look like youβre in an equally hazy state. For a moment, you two are dead silent, staring at each other, with only the sound of your soft pants and the popping of fireworks in the background to fill the silence.
Soobin is the one who breaks the silence first, smiling sheepishly as he rubs the nape of his neck. βTo be honest, Iβveβ¦ Iβve been wanting to do that for a while.β
Your eyes are as wide as saucers, and you can feel your jaw go slack in shock. Soobin had been wanting to kiss you. Soobin has thought about kissing you. Your best friend Soobin wanted to kiss you.
βWhy didnβt you?β You reply without thinking, but really, you know very well exactly why heβs never done it. Heβs your best friend, always has been, and heβd be doing much more than fucking up your friendship by kissing you before you two matched. Naturally, Soobin leaves that question unanswered, posing a question of his own instead.
βWhat made you match with me?β
βWellβ¦β You donβt know what to say. You donβt want to rattle off a list of qualities that make him desirableβ youβre already feeling flustered enough after he kissed you like that, and youβre not looking to inflate his stupid ego or risk being the butt of his teasing. But you want to be honest with him. You donβt want him thinking his suppressed desire has been one-sided all this time.
βI guess Iβve always wondered what it would be like to go on a date with you. We wouldnβt be bored, we would know how to keep each other happy, and understand each other, that kind of thingβ¦ and I was a little tired of seeing you go through all those people you didnβt click with, who didnβt get you, especially not the way I did. You know Iβve never liked the people you were seeing, and I was always annoyed by the idiots you dated in high school, and all your stupid matchesβ¦ I always thought everyone took you for granted, and no one seemed to care about actually getting to know you. I thought I was just looking out for you, caring about you, as your best friend, but maybe I was actually just jealous.β
βJealous? Really?β He looks so incredulous it embarrasses you that you have to clarify further.Β
βYes, jealousβ¦ I especially hated whatβs-her-name, Hyeji? That one student council girl who dumped you in front of the whole school.β
Soobin grimaces at the mention of her name, and you canβt help the relief you feel at his response. βUgh, her. Led me on for months because she thought I was cute and then when we started dating she nitpicked every single thing I did, all because I wasnβt the suave drama lead of her dreams and then dumped me because she couldnβt change me. You know she threw away a whole pack of my Pokemon cards because she thought it was βtoo nerdyβ?β
βSee? This is what I mean. None of your romantic partners actually seem to appreciate you as you are. And so I donβt know, something came over me, and I wanted to see if I could do a good job because IΒ know I appreciate you for who you are and now Iβm confused, and I feel like Iβve ruined our friendship forever, andββ
To your relief, Soobin doesnβt laughβ instead he cuts your rambling off with a quick kiss, and it flusters you into silence. βShh. We promised, remember?β
βI mean, we also promised each other when we were in high school that weβd settle down and raise ten dogs on a farm together.β
Soobin laughs this time. βYeah, I remember that. But this is a pinky promise, isnβt it? Itβs different.β
βYouβre rightβ¦ but itβs scary, you know? Coming to this realization about you, and thinking about you this way, and enjoying it, but also worrying about how weβre going to get out of this after our relationship expires... I donβt want to get too carried away and change our dynamic forever.β Youβre chewing the skin off your lower lip nervously (you never did break that habit, so now your lip is bleeding), and, while Soobinβs voice is gentle, you know him well enough to detect the subtle tremor as he speaks.
βI know. But weβll be okay. Weβll figure it out. I wonβt let anything remove you from my life for good. Especially not the watch.β His voice is so low, so quiet, youβd miss it if you werenβt fixated on him, as if heβs trying to convince himself, and you squeeze his hand in what you hope is an admirable attempt at reassuring him. βThe app hasnβt told us our connectionβs expired yet, so I just really, really want to give this a chance. A proper chance, so I can say I did it before I get matched with my βrealβ soulmate, or whatever. I donβt want to think about what could have been, especially not with you. I think thatβd be worse for us.β
You know exactly what he means. Harboring dormant feelings for your best friend never bodes well, at least not in the movies and the books, so you may as well get this pining out of your system, and let it become a distant memory as soon as possible, if itβs not meant to be. Itβs only fair, for both of your futures, and for your friendship. (and though neither of you want to admit it, the thought of not being each otherβs soulmates is depressing.)
βLook, Soobβ¦ I really want to give this a chance, too. I want to see where it takes us while weβre allowed to. I want to try. Itβs scary, itβs fucking terrifying, but youβre my best friend, Soob. I promise you wonβt lose me because of some stupid watch. Pinky promise.β You try to keep your voice upbeat as you hold out your pinky towards him, offering a tender smile. He links his pinky with yours, and you can see his frame visibly relax once he does.Β
You rest your head on his shoulder, pinkies still linked, and silently hope that youβll be able to uphold your promise to him. Youβve never been any good with breakups. Soobin knows that.
But youβll be okay with him, right?
Heβs your best friend, after all.
[How would you rate your date?]
[β β β β β ]
β¦
Congratulations! Your next date is scheduled for 2pm tomorrow, at the Botanical Gardens.
Soobin decided on his own that heβs picking you up for the third date, and he let you know as much.Β After last nightβs events though, this means that youβre turning your entire closet upside down trying to find the sweet spot for your look today, because your head is jumbled with far too many thoughts, all of them about Soobin. Every outfit you think up is either too dressy, or too casual, or too out there, or too bland, and you have half a mind to reschedule with your mind in the state that it is. Unfortunately for you, Soobin is already on his way, and youβre not the type of asshole to tell him to head back home and forget the whole date, so you just stare at your pile of clothes on the floor, hoping that somehow youβll be enlightened with the perfect outfit idea and get yourself looking presentable before he comes knocking.
The universe is clearly not on your side, though, because your doorbell rings not even a minute later, and all youβve picked out is your jeans and youβre still very much topless. You shoot a message to Soobin, thumbs flying frantically as you let him know youβre not quite ready yetβ he might be your best friend in the entire world, but youβre not ready for him to see you under your clothes just yet, especially now that youβre properly seeing each other.
Youβre still not sure what to wear, but you figure a beige knit sweater should be safeβ you wonβt look like youβre trying too hard, but you also wonβt look like youβre not trying at all. When you swing the door open to finally greet Soobin, your breath quite literally gets taken away, because he trips and almost knocks you over with his lanky frame, but also, heβs breathtaking.
Heβs clearly put a lot of thought into his outfit, which is very cute, and he looks absolutely stunning. A sleek black cardigan with white striped accents on the sleeve, a white dress shirt that clearly looks freshly pressedβ hell, heβs even wearing a tieβ and those godforsaken glasses that have you in a chokehold somehow. You donβt even bother hiding your delightβ heβs so beautiful, and you know he needs a little validation after he probably spent hours putting his look together.
He catches you staring wordlessly, and he flushes with embarrassment.βWhat? Too much? I knew I should have skipped on the tieββ He grumbles, making a move to loosen it, but heβs stopped by your hand over his.
βNo. You look great, Soob. Seriously.β Youβre not used to being verbally affectionate, especially not with him, but when he looks that sad, like a kicked puppy, you know better than to tease him when heβs unsure of himself. Despite that, youβre still shy as you reassure him. βYou look beautiful.β
The way he brightens when he hears your words is almost cartoonish, and this time, you canβt hold back your laughter, which earns a pout from him, which in turn only fuels your laughter further. You appease him by lacing your fingers with his (heβs apparently a lot easier to please than you remember, but maybe thatβs your imagination), and he responds by placing a kiss to the back of your hand. The gesture is tender and sweet, and you think about what itβd be like to have Soobin do that to you every day.
βWell, shall we?β He bows exaggeratedly with his free arm, giving you a blinding smile.
You mirror his smile, and playfully curtsy in return. βWe shall.β
When you two arrive at the botanical gardens, itβs jam-packed with people (a worker explains that their tulips are in full bloom, so everyoneβs vying for their social media moment), and Soobin is visibly startled, though he recovers quickly as he turns to you.Β
βYou okay? Thereβs so many people... I think this is twice, maybe even thrice as many people as there were at the night market.β You donβt do well with crowds, the crowd at the night market was probably the most you could handle, but you know that you donβt have a choiceβ you have to follow through with the date as scheduled, or risk a fine that neither of you can afford, so you just nod, your grip on his hand tightening.Β
Soobin somehow finds a slightly less crowded area of the tulip fields for you two to stroll in after doing a quick sweep (thank god for his height, and that he uses it to his advantage), but you still feel tense as you walk hand in hand. Thereβs still a decent amount of people, with more spilling in excitedly, phone cameras in hand, and you have a bad feeling the crowd will only grow in size as the day drags on. You just hope youβre as convincing an actress as you think you are, and that Soobin wonβt notice as he reads the identification cards for each flower.
Youβre caught off guard when he gently pushes you down onto a nearby bench, and crouches in front of you, clasping your other hand in his so that both of them are occupied. The concerned expression on his face tells you that youβre nowhere near an Oscar for your performance, and that heβs most definitely caught on to your discomfort. Normally youβd be embarrassed at the displayβ you hate making a scene in public, but your anxiety is getting the better of you, and itβs nice to know that he still knows you as well as you thought.
βNoonaβ¦ look. I know you donβt like crowds, especially excitable and hectic ones like these. If you really, really feel like this is too much for you, we can cancel the date and go home. I want you to have a good time, and I know itβs hard for you when thereβs so many people.β
Youβre chewing at your lower lip again, and Soobin lets go of one of your hands to thumb at your lip to stop you before you tear it open with your teeth. βBut Soob, we came all this way. And you dressed so nicely for me, for this date, and I spent all this time wanting to look good for you, and spend time with youβ¦β You trail off when your breath catches in your throat, your chin trembling as your eyes well up. βItβd be such a waste to cancel after all our time and effort.β
Once again Soobinβs thumb is gently swiping over your cheeks when the tears finally spill over, hushing you with the soft sincerity that heβs prone to when heβs not teasing you.Β
βHey, heyβ¦ we can reschedule for another day, canβt we? We donβt have to do this, noona. Thereβs always next time. It wonβt be a waste, I promise.β You feel so apologetic you could die. Soobinβs being so patient and sweet and understanding with you and here you are, kicking up a fuss. The least you could do is power through and follow through with your scheduled date, and youβd hate to miss out on this time with him that youβve been looking forward to. You were excited for this date, and you want him to know that.
βI think Iβd feel worse if we cancelled after we went through all this trouble, and especially if it was all because of meβ¦ just give me a moment to calm myself down.β Soobin nods in response, cradling your cheek in his palm, and you sigh appreciatively at the tender gesture. He doesnβt say anything as you wipe away the remnants of your tears and blow your noseβ he just holds your hand, letting you gather yourself, and you think for a moment that this must be the benefit of falling for your best friend.
Once the tears have finally subsided, and youβve had a moment to calm your nerves, you meet Soobinβs eyes, which are searching yours, as if scanning for any lingering signs of discomfort. When he canβt find any, and you give him a reassuring look and a grateful smile, he seizes the opportunity to steal a peck from your lips, grinning cheekily with his tongue between his teeth when he pulls away.Β
βH-hey! What was that for?!β Your shock and surprise is real, but your indignance certainly isnβt, if your rosy cheeks are any indication. Your discomfort is forgotten, at least temporarily, so youβre glad for that.
βOhβ¦ just because. You liked it, though.β Heβs so smug, that stupid asshole, but heβs right, so you pull him in for another quick kiss before you try to make a run for it. Unfortunately for your escape plan, youβve forgotten that your hand is still very much interlocked with his, and heβs significantly stronger than you, so he easily pulls you back into his embrace. You canβt say you mind, thoughβ heβs warm and he smells good, like jasmine and sandalwood and the faint scent of vanilla, and if you werenβt already so flustered youβd bury your face in his broad chest.
βFeeling better now?β The words fall from Soobinβs lips with a teasing lilt, but you know itβs his way of genuinely checking in on you, so you answer sincerely.
βMuch better. Though Iβd still like to avoid the crowds and find somewhere else to have our dateβ¦ if you donβt mind? The tulips are pretty, and as much as I would like to admire them too, thereβs just so many people fighting for a good photoβ¦βΒ
βOf course, I get it. I saw a sign pointing to a field of azaleas over there that is probably getting a lot less foot traffic than the tulips, so we could head over there?β He gestures in the opposite direction of the tulip field, and youβre more than happy to oblige, letting him tug you along.
Thankfully Soobinβs guess is correct, because thereβs only a handful of people at the azalea field when you two arrive, and the tension in your shoulders finally lets up. The dainty red and pink flowers have their own quaint charm, and theyβre vibrant and eye-catching. You crouch down to get a closer look, taking hold of a delicate petal in between the pads of your fingers to admire them.
βDid you know red and pink azaleas represent love and romance? Roses arenβt the only flower of love like everyone seems to think.β Soobinβs deep voice rings in your ear and you startle a little, partially because heβs way closer to you than you expected (itβs going to be a while before you get used to maintaining close proximity with him) and partially because you had no idea Soobin was just casually carrying the knowledge of flower meanings in that pretty head of his.
βTheyβre so prettyβ¦ theyβd make a much more unique gift than roses for special occasions, too. Not that thereβs anything wrong with roses, but theyβre kind of done to death, donβt you think?β
Instead of answering, Soobin looks both ways, then plucks a flower, and you hiss in disapproval at him. βHeyβ! What are you doing? The sign says that we canβt pick the flowers!β Luckily, none of the staff has taken notice of his mischievous little act, but even if they did, you canβt help but wonder if theyβd even care, when he could charm his way into anything.
Soobin tucks the flower behind your ear, seemingly ignoring your disapproval as he hums a tune under his breath. βA gift for our special occasion, and a little commemoration of our budding romance, or something. And look, noona, youβre so pretty. Just like a flower.β He punctuates his statement with the sound of his phone camera flashing, followed by four more, until youβre blushing profusely with embarrassment.
βSoobin, thatβs enoughββ Your cheeks are beet redβ you can feel it from the sheer amount of blood running into themβ and though you really like that Soobinβs taking pictures of you for him to keep, youβre extremely camera shy, and he knows that, which is probably why heβs so insistent.
βActually, the issue is that I didnβt take enough. Now smile for the camera!β You have to practically wrestle your way away from the camera, but not before he snaps a few more of you smiling bashfully at him. He catches up to you with ease (damn those long legs of his), arms secure around your frame as you squeal, though youβre secretly pleased that youβre in his hold.
The time once again ticks by like nothing as you walk side by side, admiring the blooms around you and snapping photos of each other (βFor wallpaper usage purposes,β Soobin says, and you blush again), and before you know it, your watches are beeping to signify that your two hours are up. Soobin sobers up almost immediately, expression unreadable, and though he doesnβt say anything as he takes your hand, you know whatβs on his mind, because the same thing is on yours.
Thereβs a palpable tension hanging in the air once the two of you reach the entrance of the gardensβ itβs the third date, after all, and you promised youβd find out your expiration date if you made it this far. Youβre relieved that your watches havenβt blared just yet, signifying the end of your connection, but youβre still struck with the nervousness of finding out how long youβll last. You think youβll never get over it if you only get a few monthsβ or worse, a few days with himβ after all this secret pining and yearning.
If you didnβt know any better, youβd think Soobin was somehow eerily calm about the whole thing. But you do know better, and you know that heβs just trying to put on a brave face for you, and for himself. The two of you open Time to Love in silence, hands still interlocked, swiping to the βLove Countdownβ tab with your free hands, and brace yourselves. Soobin gives you a reassuring nod, and you respond back with what you hope is an equally reassuring smile, and that your expression doesnβt betray the fear bubbling deep within you.
Soobin takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. βOkay, on the count of three,β
βOneβ¦β
βTwoβ¦β
βThree!β
When both of you tap the in-app tab, there isnβt an array of numbers indicating an expiration date with a ticking countdown, as you expected and had grown accustomed to on your previous datesβ in fact, there isnβt a single number on the screenβ and instead thereβs an infinity sign.
You two donβt have an expiration date.
You and Soobin look at each other, then at your watches, then at each other again.Β
βWait, we donβt have an expiration dateββ
Then the realization dawns on both of you, and it hits you like a truck.
βWait, weβre soulmates?!β
Both of you are sporting the same bewildered expression, and you both go to check your progress bars, just to be sureβ theyβre full, just as youβd expect after being matched with your soulmate. So thatβs why your watch alarms havenβt gone off. You two were the one in a million. Once the shock finally wears off, itβs replaced with pure, unbridled joy, and when Soobin sweeps you off your feet to gather you in his arms, thereβs an emotion bubbling in you thatβs equal parts unfamiliar and yet welcome.
Youβd thought all this time, all these years, that there was no way you should feel this way about your best friend, of all people. That you shouldnβt fuck this up, because Soobin has always been there for you, and youβve always been there for him. As his friend. As your friend.Β
But here is the universe, telling you that youβre fated to love him, and that heβs fated to love you in return.Β
And love him you do. You love Soobin. And when you look at him, and see the way heβs looking at you, with fondness practically dripping from his gaze, you know he loves you too.Β
Maybe the watch really is bullshit. Maybe it is statistically impossible to decide someoneβs life partner based on an algorithm.
But maybe itβs onto something, because it seems silly to have ever thought of being with anyone except Soobin. You never wouldβve thought to look for your forever right next to you, and yet, here he is, in the flesh. Was it a coincidence that he made it onto your recommended matches that fateful night? Was it a coincidence that he felt the same way you did?
Soobinβs lips capture yours in a searing kiss, and you melt in his heat, kissing him back with a fierce fervor, as if desperately communicating the depth of the feelings youβve let build up silently after all these years. You decide that thereβs no such thing as coincidencesβ heβs always known whatβs best for you, and youβve always wanted whatβs best for him. You just didnβt know that the answer to both of those things was each other.
βI love you, noona.β He whispers with a bashful, dimpled smile, and your heart swells.
βI love you too, Soob.β
Soobin has always been counting down to something.Β
To the end of another grueling workday, the next League of Legends patch update, to anything, so he always has something to look forward to. But heβs never looked forward to this.
The love countdown has always been something he despised and dreadedβ heβs always wanted to be the master of his own fate, without the shackles of the app tying him down with each new connection. Heβd always thought that his soulmate would be some poorly matched individual who heβd have a mediocre life with, but all that seems to be proven wrong as he looks at you.
He hates being wrong. But when he sees the way you smile, the way you regard him with the utmost love and affection in your gaze, the way you hold his hand as if youβll lose him if you let goβ he thinks heβs willing to concede defeat, at least this time.
Maybe that stupid watch does know a thing or two about love. Maybe it doesnβt. Maybe this is all just pure coincidence. But despite it all, Soobin is thankful that this is where he ends up. That both of you had been counting down all this time to each other.Β
If there's anyone he can count on in this world, it's you.
summary: in a world where love is given an expiration date, you find your forever home in an unexpected place.
word count: 10.1k
tags: soulmate!au, best friends to lovers, mostly romance + fluff, fake dating if you squint, reader is afab w/ gender neutral pronouns + fem terms (noona) used
author's note: finally got around to finishing this... it's been a long while coming and i couldn't get myself to write for various reasons and i'm so happy it's all done and out there! (also for any black mirror fans out there, yes this is loosely based on the 'hang the dj' episode but way more lighthearted and with a dash of soulmate brainrot) hope you enjoy and wishing everyone a wonderful holiday season <3
For as long as Soobin can remember, heβs been counting down the days.Β
To summer vacation, to the end of his shift at his part time job, to the start of a long awaited trip, to anything. But thereβs something else that counts down on his behalf, something that he doesnβt particularly want to count.
That something is inlaid in a nondescript watch wrapped around his wrist. Everyone gets one once they turn 18, and as far as heβs concerned, its only purpose is to ruin relationships. The cruel hands of time assign a βbest byβ date to each romantic encounter, flashing on the screen from the first meeting, with each failure promising to lead the user closer and closer to their fated lover. If you ask Soobin, itβs all bullshit. How would a stupid watch know anything about fate, anyways?
Itβs a typical Thursday night, and Soobinβs mindlessly scrolling through Time to Love, the government mandated dating app that all phones come with, as per usual when he canβt decide on something to watch. He has yet to meet the weekly two date quota, having only gone on one on Tuesday (important to note that heβs already forgotten his name), and heβs running out of time, and he really canβt afford to pay that 100,000 won fine this week. Well, he canβt afford to pay it at any point in time, but this weekβs been especially rough on him, and he doesnβt want to shell out any more of his meager savings just because he couldnβt get a date, of all things.Β
The names and faces on his phone screen are a blur as his thumb swipes left aimlesslyβ he doesnβt really give that much of a shit who he ends up with, because at the end of the day, heβll say βNoβ when the app asks him if heβd liked them and give them a terrible review saying they were incompatible, because frankly, the algorithm seems to always be wrong when it comes to his matches. Either that, or itβs because he cares so little that he doesnβt bother properly vetting his matches.
Heβs resigned himself to his fate anyways; heβll fill up his progress bar with a bunch of shitty matches until the algorithm decides itβs time for him to settle down, then when he finds his βsoulmateβ (if you could even call it that), heβll just be doomed to a loveless arranged marriage set in place by a computer and die unhappy. He canβt envision happiness ever coming out of something so lifeless, so cold, so thatβs just how it has to be. At least it gives him something to do instead of rewatching the same three anime series over and over again.
Whateverβ heβll just swipe right on the next person and go on yet another unmemorable date tomorrow. Lee Saerom, the profile reads. Sheβs exceptionally pretty, he has to admit, and sheβs an artist, (and sheβs older, but donβt ask him about that) so heβll just ask her about her work and let her ramble for the allotted two hours while he smiles and nods.
He swipes right, and a bright pink heart pattern fills his screen, signifying a successful match. Obnoxious. Itβs replaced with a time and a place, and he lets out a groan. Congratulations! Your date is scheduled for 6pm, at the Coffee Shop. He was supposed to meet you at 7 tomorrow for your usual Friday night updates.Β
Fuck. What if the date goes on longer than an hour?
Heβs never been late for your weekly meetups, but he figures youβll understand, since itβs completely out of his control.
Surely you wonβt kill him, right?
Just in case, he recites a prayer to himself before he tucks in for the night.
Youβre already nursing your third vodka soda of the night and Soobin is still nowhere to be found, which is unusual. Heβs never been the most punctual person, but standing you up for an hour after your usual meeting time isnβt like him, either. He said heβd be late, but he didnβt specify how lateβ¦ youβll grill him later when he explains himself, and youβll make him buy you a drink or two as compensation. With the comfort of a free drink in mind, youβre about to order your fourth round when Soobin finally stumbles in through the door of the bar, eyes scanning each booth until his gaze lands on you, and with an apologetic smile, heβs sliding into the seat across from you.Β
He gestures to your glass, brow curled upwards, which you know means heβs teasing you. βWhat number is this one, noona? You always polish these things off like theyβre nothing.β
βThis is number three, with number four on the way, and thatβs because they are. You owe me at least two for taking so long to get here, asshole.β You let out an indignant huff as you slurp the last of the cocktail through your straw, lips jutting in a comical pout.
βOkay, okay. Next oneβs on me.β Soobin relents with an endeared laugh, waving down the waitstaff and ordering a beer for himself, along with another vodka soda for you.Β
βOkay, now spill.β
βWhat? Am I supposed to have some hot gossip for you? Donβt make me guess about what drama Iβve somehow found myself in on accident.β Heβs visibly confused, brows knitted together, and you roll your eyes at him.
βObviously the only reason you would ever skip out on your dear noona was if TTL scheduled you for a date during our usual time, so spill. How bad was this one?βΒ
His lips part in understanding, (you can practically see the figurative lightbulb flickering on) head bobbing in an exaggerated nod before pulling his phone out, hand outstretched to show you his dateβs profile. βI mean, she was okay, I guess. Pretty girl, and she was older, but she spent the entirety of our time slot babbling about her latest art project and how itβs supposedly going to blow away the industry. Which is fine, I guess, because you know I hate talking on these dates, but if she said βbrush techniqueβ and βnegative spaceβ one more time I think I wouldβve tried to drown myself in my caffe mocha. The app thought so too, I guess, because when we checked our expiration date, it was exactly an hour from the start time, so itβs not like I missed out on my forever soulmate or whatever.β
Each TTL date is scheduled for an arbitrary amount of time, depending on your expiration date, which is determined from the first moment you meetβ sometimes itβs just a few minutes, an hour or two, and anything longer than 24 hours is given a two hour time slot maximum. Thereβs supposedly an extremely rare case where you arenβt given an expiration date from the get go, regardless of your progress, meaning that youβve found your soulmate by sheer luck, but itβs almost unheard ofβ most people donβt find their soulmates until theyβve completely filled up their bars, something about needing ample data to calculate optimal compatibility.
You ogle at his phone screen for a bitβ she really was stunningβ then guffaw at the thought of Soobin nodding halfheartedly, listening to a pretty girl talk his ear off, when most men would probably kill to be in his position. βDamn, if even an older woman that pretty canβt hold your attention, and the app confirms that, you know itβs badβ¦ So, where does that put your progress at? Werenβt you at like, 80% last week?β
Soobinβs face practically scrunches in on itself at your remark, tapping the app once more to check his updated progress bar. βIβm going to ignore that. Iβm atβ¦ 88% after I reviewed Saerom and that guy from earlier in the week. Guess it wasnβt a total waste if I got 8% closer to completion. What are you at now?β
You lift your phone to open TTL, your progress bar only having inched 2% closer to completion after your date yesterday. β75% now. I think the algorithm is personally fucking me over, or something. My last few matches have been nice enough, but I cannot keep up with their energy. Itβs wringing me dry. I must be the only person in the entire world who doesnβt want a golden retriever for a partner. My date yesterday just about knocked me out for good, he was that energetic.β
βTell me about it,β Soobin commiserates. βIβve very clearly expressed my distaste for bubbly and talkative people who probably peaked in high school, but thatβs all theyβre spitting out in my for you page. No offense to them, I donβt think Iβve met any straight up assholes since that one girl from last year, but itβs like the app is purposely recommending the most incompatible people to meβ wait, yesterday? And I didnβt hear about this?β
You give him a pointed look, silently conveying that he also didnβt inform you of his date today until ten minutes ago. He gets the message and holds his hands up in defeat, then gestures for you to speak, dimples peeking out as he purses his lips. You sigh, rubbing your temples as you recall the most chaotic two hours of the week, maybe even your life.
βOkay, lookβ¦ for the record, he was very nice to me, a perfect gentleman, but my god, could that guy talk. He was practically falling at his knees trying to impress me, which wouldβve earned him a few points in my book, but his mouth was moving maybe five miles a minute at all times without a moment of rest. It was like watching a child hopped up on sugar, to be honest. He talked for forty whole minutes nonstop about pizza. Donβt even get me started on how passionate he was about his workout routine.β
Your drinks finally come around, and Soobin hands you your frosted glass, which you gratefully take a long sip out of before continuing. βAnd before you say anything, no, he was nothing like Kai. Also, Kai is literally like my child, and just because I babysat him all those years does not mean I want to date someone like him.β
Soobin parts his lips to respond, then scrunches his nose in distaste as you take the words right of his mouth, opting to down his drink instead. βYouβre no fun.β
βBut thatβs why you love me, right?β
βSure, noona, sure.β
βThatβs it, asshole, you owe me another drink.β
Sunday rolls around, which means youβve got to start scoping out this weekβs datesβ you hate leaving anything to the last minute, and you like to leave the end of your week as free as possible (no one is prying your precious rest time from you, not even a beautiful person with the worldβs best personality).Β
Which means youβre mindlessly swiping through a sea of profiles, hoping you find someone thatβs at least remotely interesting. Youβre prepared for a long night of doom scrolling, but you stop cold in your tracks as you come across a familiar name and face, and a lump forms in your throat.
Choi Soobin.
The algorithm is really fucking with you now. It has to be. Youβve never once even considered your best friend as a potential suitor, not because he isnβt insanely attractive and charming (and funny, and easy to talk to, andβ¦), but because heβs your best friend. Youβve known him for so long, youβve seen him cry when he couldnβt get the Pokemon card he wanted when he was young enough to need allowance to buy it, and heβs seen you for long enough to know you threw the nastiest toddler tantrums over being denied an ice cream purchaseβ the point is that you know him a little too well, and you know from experience that thatβs not always ideal in romance.Β
But you have been having terrible luck with your matches for so long, and two hours of Soobinβs undivided attention doesnβt seem so bad, and it would be a good time, at leastβ¦
You kick yourself mentally for even thinking of it. Heβs your best friend, for godβs sake.
Yet your thumb continues to hover over his profile, quivering as you make the motion to swipe right on him without touching the screen. The guilt and the risk of maybe ruining your friendship forever clearly isnβt enough to stop you from considering him.Β
The gentle, familiar smile that heβs sporting in his profile picture pierces your heart, and youβre not sure why. Maybe youβve always had a thing for him unconsciously, maybe you just want someone who actually gets you, maybe youβre just running out of options. Or maybe youβre just tired of chasing after something you know is futile, and you want to take a chance on something, on someone, that might actually be good for you. On someone that you know would be good to you, and for you.
And so, with bated breath, you swipe right.
[Time to Love: Y/N has liked you! Open the app for more details.]
To say Soobin is struck with disbelief would be an understatement. Heβs practically gaping at his phone, and he knows youβd be laughing your ass off and making fun of him if you could see him. But itβs precisely that typical flippant attitude of yours thatβs got him perplexed about this development.
Heβd be lying if he said heβs never once thought of you that wayβ heβs always thought you were pretty and kind hearted, despite your temper, and youβve always been there for him, through thick and thin, even when he was being kind of a dick. That definitely counts for something. But heβs never thought about crossing that boundary, because 1) heβs not allowed to pursue anyone he doesnβt match with through the app anyways, and 2) matching with you could make or break your bond forever (heβs leaning towards break, though, because like he said, the watch is bullshit). In short, heβs a fucking coward and a little too cynical for his own good.Β
But here it is, an opportunity for a date with you, in all its glory, and initiated by you, no less. He should be celebrating, or at least hyped up, because maybe itβll all work out, maybe this is the solution to all his lukewarm matches over the last few months, but instead heβs downright terrified. Thereβs absolutely no way that you both come out of this unscathed. Thereβs no such thing as a perfect forever if itβs decided by a computer. There canβt possibly be a happy ending at the end of this road.
He shakes his head, as if it would clear his head of the panicked thoughts. Youβre still his best friend, at the end of the day, he tells himself, and heβs sure that youβll fight just as hard as he will to keep him in your life. So he holds onto the tiniest sliver of hope that somehow your relationship doesnβt crash and burn spectacularly, opens the app, and swipes right on you.
Congratulations! Your date is scheduled for 3pm, at the Aquarium.Β
A new notification pops up. Soobinβs heart stirs.
y/n noona: see you tomorrow β₯οΈ
He feels guilty as a wave of excitement washes over him. He shouldnβt be feeling like this. Youβre his best friend. His dear noona. He may as well be signing away your friendship for good. But itβd be worse if he didnβt match your enthusiasm.
soob: yup, see you tomorrow noona :]
Itβs only 5 minutes past the scheduled meeting time, and already Soobinβs panicking that youβve changed your mind and cancelled on him, writing this off as a mistake. Heβs trying his very best to remain nonchalant, itβs just a date with his best friend, who he might have a sapling of a crush on, no big deal, right? Or maybe it is for the best if you cancel, then heβd have one less crippling fear to worry about.
Heβs rethinking his outfit for the umpteenth timeβ he didnβt want to look like he was trying too hard, not in front of you because youβd probably think it was silly, but he also doesnβt want you thinking he shows up to dates looking like a slob. (For the record, he thinks heβs got a decent sense of fashion. Heβs better than Kai, at least, though that isnβt saying much.) Heβs internally debating if he shouldβve gone with the navy polo shirt instead of the grey cardigan draped over his shoulders, or if he shouldβve gone with the black slacks instead of the light wash jeans, but his jumbled thoughts dissipate as you tap on his shoulder, shit-eating grin and all.Β
βWhatβs with you, Soob? You look like the fate of the universe depends on you, and you only have 5 minutes to save all of humanity.β You tease, nudging your shoulder against his. Oh, if only you knew what was really weighing on him.
He has half a mind to swat your shoulder, but heβs a little too aware that the two of you are supposed to be on a date, so instead he shoves his hands into his pockets. To his surprise, youβre more dressed up than usual, (heβs used to seeing you exclusively in oversized hoodies) andβ wait, you two are practically matching, from the grey cardigan, light wash jeans, all the way down to the white sneakers. The only difference is that youβve buttoned up your cardigan so that it functions more as a blouse, but you two clearly have definitely mastered the art of accidental couple looks.
βOkay, awkwardβ¦ one of us has to change.β He teases in an attempt to ease his own racing mind, dimples peeking out as he stifles a laugh. You let out an indignant huff, pushing his massive frame with no success. He doesnβt even budge.
βNot my fault that youβre trying to steal my look. I wore it better, by the way,β You retort, but truth be told, youβre reeling at the sight of him. Youβve only ever seen him in his stuffy work attire and the worn-out, faded shirts he refuses to throw out, and seeing him in a comparably softer, more preppy look is making you see him with new eyes.
You shake your head, as if doing so will reset your perspective to factory settings and make you see him as just your best friend again. (spoiler alert: it doesnβt. Soobin is still handsome and he looks very cute, and youβre still very much affected by it.) βOkay, so. First things first. Should we check our apps? To see if, like, weβre compatible, or I donβt know.β Your voice is stiff, like youβre buffering, and you donβt think youβve ever been this awkward around Soobin, at least not since the day you met.
Soobin turns up his nose in disagreement and covers his watch screen and yours. βNah, thatβs bullshit. Itβs already all decided, isnβt it? Itβs been decided from the second we stepped into the aquarium. No point in checking now, we should decide for ourselves if this is something we want to pursue, instead of letting some computer dictate that. When itβs over, itβs over, and we can just go back to being friends, right?β
βWell, I think itβs probably better to know when to give this a rest, instead of constantly wondering if my best friend is set to be my long-term romantic partner, or whatever.β You had a point. But a part of Soobin didnβt feel ready to face the fact that you might not want to see him again like this. A much smaller part of him is still fearful that you two might not be able to turn back from this.
βOkay, okay, fine. We can check itβbut not now. If we make it to a third date, then we can check how long we have. But you have to be honest and not touch it whatsoever.β Soobin doesnβt make any move to mention that he isnβt interested in seeing you again, but you donβt want to just assume that heβs into you, so you test the waters.
βOkay, I promise to be honest. But why the third date? Are you really that keen on seeing me?β Youβre trying to be teasing, but you feel more desperate than anything.
Soobin doesnβt answer for a moment, and you think that youβve said the wrong thing. Just as youβre about to apologize, he replies, βIf we make it to a third dateβ¦ then Iβll know whether weβre actually giving this a proper shot and not just for shits and giggles or as an escape from our other failed connections.β
His sincerity both surprises and flatters you, and you canβt tell if youβre supposed to be frozen in shock or hugging him, or a secret third thing, so you just stay still, absently fiddling with your fingers.
When you look up again, Soobinβs holding out his hand, and you look at him with obvious confusion. Rolling his eyes, he takes your hand in his, lips pursed into a thin line. You want to make some clever jab at him, but his hands are warm and soft and they practically swallow up your much smaller ones, and youβre filled with a wash of emotions so intense that you canβt muster up the strength to retort.
Soobin notices that youβre still visibly perplexed, and he mutters. βWeβre on a date, you know. Weβve got to act the part.β Itβs a half truth at best; he does want to give this date a proper chance, but selfishly, he really just wants to hold your hand for two hours. If you catch onto his white lie, you donβt show it, but he doesnβt miss the rosy hue that colors your cheeks as you nod.
Heβs right, you thinkβ it is a date, and youβre the one who swiped on him first, so the least you can do is treat him like a possible suitor and not just your best friend. He deserves that much, at least, and you need to know whether this bundle of butterflies in your stomach is a passing feeling or a dull ache youβve forgotten about, so you let him lead you into the dimly lit array of fish tanks.
Youβre noticing a lot of things about Soobin.
You notice that Soobinβs eyes practically twinkle when he gets excited. Itβs never been something youβve taken note of, but you canβt help but notice it now, every time he points out a species of fish he recognizes. Itβs cute. Youβre not sure if youβre supposed to find your best friend cute, but you do.
You notice how his comically long fingers slot in between yours, and youβre really starting to like how it feels, though youβd die of embarrassment if you admitted as much.Β
Not to mention heβs an absolutely perfect gentleman. Heβs constantly asking you if you want something to eat, if youβre tired, if youβre cold, and you let him know that youβre fine each time. When you accidentally pull apart your shoelaces, heβs quick to kneel down and tie them up for you. When he stops to grab himself a bottle of juice, he offers one to you, too.
Had Soobin always been this pretty? So cute? And so sweet? How had you never taken notice of him like this all these years? (You know the answer to that, but youβre still surprised at what youβre noticing nonetheless.)
Soobin catches you staring at him while youβre both supposed to be looking at a school of clownfish, and you expect him to make some egotistical joke at your expense, but instead he gives you a warm smile, eyes crinkling into crescents, and god dammit to hell, you melt.Β
The two hours pass by like nothing, and unlike your past few dates, youβre dreading the end of it, and you wish that the beep signifying itβs over would never come. To your disappointment, he releases your hand as you approach the entrance, and your hand is already missing his warmth. You turn to face him; well, not really, because you canβt bear to make eye contact with him, not when you spent the better part of two hours shamelessly ogling at him.
His voice cuts in between the thoughts rattling around in your head, and he sounds so apprehensive that it worries you. βCan I ask you something? No, wait, can you promise me something?β
You know how seriously Soobin takes his promises, so youβre a little scared for what heβs going to say next, but you nod anyway.
βPromise me that if this doesnβt work out, weβll still be friends. Please.β The last word is so quiet that you almost miss it, and when you finally muster the courage to meet his gaze, heβs giving you a pleading look so earnestly that it breaks your heart a little.Β
βI promiseβ no, I pinky promise. Weβll be friends, no matter what.β
Since he was younger, Soobinβs held the belief that pinky promises are binding, and he knows that you know this, so you hold out your pinky, hoping that this can ease whatever worries he has on his mind.
You pinky promised. Soobin knows that itβs your unspoken way of assuring him (youβve never been the most verbally affectionate, anyways), a quiet way of letting him know that he means just as much to you as you do to him. He links pinkies with you to seal the promise, feeling just a little bit lighter as you both make your way to the subway station together, shoulders bumping all the while.
Soobin just really, really hopes that youβll be able to keep that promise.
[How would you rate your date?]
[β β β β β ]
Congratulations! Your next date is scheduled for 8pm tonight, at the Night Market.
You shouldnβt be surprised that your next date with Soobin comes so soonβ you still have your weekly quotas to meet, and the app always schedules dates within 24 hours of matching or a positive rating, but truth be told, your surprise is solely because you just donβt know how to face him. You two had made that pinky promise to stay friends regardless of the circumstances, but youβd also resolved to treat him like a potential suitor while you two are seeing each other, so where does that leave you?Β
Well, it leaves you in front of the closet with no idea what to wear. You want to look good (for Soobin, but youβre in denial at the moment), but itβs just a night market, and you know youβll never hear the end of it if Soobin catches on that you went through lengths just to impress him.
Speaking of the devil, your phone flickers on to reveal a text from him, and you scoff as you scan its contents.
soob: so i hear you enjoyed our date
y/n noona: ignoring that. anyways
y/n noona: whatβs the deal for tonight
y/n noona: i need to know asap
soob: aw, noona, do you want to see me again that badly? iβm excited, see you later tonight β₯οΈ
y/n noona: shut up, you clearly want to see me again too. donβt be late or iβm stealing your wallet laterΒ
y/n noona: i'm asking whatβs the dress code, are we matching again :p
soob: i mean, if you insistβ¦ π i knew you wanted me
y/n noona: nvm youβre getting me in a hoodie and my raggedy sweats with the hole in the knee, fuck you
soob: no no i take it back iβm sorryΒ
y/n noona: ok fine you get spared just this once
y/n noona: [IMG_3687.jpg]
y/n noona: final outfit check. if weβre going to be matching it will be your decision so choose wisely
soob: wait thatβs not fair
soob: noona come back
soob: DONβT LEAVE ME HANGING LIKE THIS
[y/n noona has βLikedβ your message]
soob: you are so mean to me
You let out a sigh of relief you didnβt know you were holding when Soobin arrives, clad in a blue flannel thatβs nearly identical to yours, black tee, beige cargos, and a black shoulder bag. Youβd been hoping he would follow through, and thereβs a small surge of pride at how youβll be walking around the market, hand in hand, in matching outfits, but thereβs something you hadnβt been counting on.
Heβs wearing his glasses.Β
Youβve always known that Soobin doesnβt have the best eyesight (heβs constantly squinting to see things, but so do you), but now that youβre seeing him in a new light, his usual black frames are suddenly the most attractive thing in the world, and you may as well be holding a neon sign that blares βI HEART NERDSβ for him to see.
You make a painfully pathetic attempt to mask your delight by waving at him with a grin, and thankfully Soobin doesnβt notice, or if he does, he doesnβt make any show of it, and instead he simply salutes at you with two fingers and cracks a grin. As he sidles up to you, his large hand slips into yours with a little too much ease, fingers immediately interlocking with yours, and it sends your head into a frenzy all over again. As if heβs aware that your mind is going haywire, Soobin leans down towards you, and for a second you think heβs going to kiss you.
Youβre frantically trying to make some motion to stop him, itβs so sudden and your cheeks are way too hot now, and heβs way too close, and your damn arms wonβt budgeβ
βI hope you came ready to eat. I came armed with a fuck load of cash because I am going to stuff myself silly with food, and I am not getting turned away by the βcash onlyβ booths.β Thereβs a fire of determination in Soobinβs eyes, paired with a wide grin, and you donβt know whether to be concerned for him or for yourself, but nonetheless, youβre a little relieved that you completely misread the situation. Before you can say anything in response, though, heβs dragging you towards the sweeping lines of booths, already making a beeline for some takoyaki.Β
The tray full of octopus balls in Soobinβs hands is steaming and they smell absolutely mouthwatering, and, in true Soobin fashion, he gets over excited and tries to pop the entire thing in his mouth in one go. He immediately regrets it, of course, because immediately heβs whining over the fact that his tongue is now most definitely burnt and numb from the piping hot orb of batter heβd just tried to scarf down. You might be finding him insanely attractive now, but heβs still as clumsy as ever, and you canβt stifle the laughter that bubbles in your throat at the sight.
βDumbassβ¦ you should know damn well that you shouldnβt put a whole takoyaki in your mouth like that.β You tease, snickering as he fans his tongue once he swallows.
βShut up! I couldnβt help myself!β He lets out a childish huff, stuffing another ball into his mouth with a comically exaggerated pout, and consequently huffing and puffing at the heat that blooms in his mouth once more. The whole display is undeniably adorable, and it takes all of the willpower you have to resist the burning desire to squish his cheeks.Β
The tray of takoyaki is polished off in no time, and a bowl of bingsu, a cup of fish cake soup, two sticks of tanghulu, a plate of sweet rice cakes, an ice cream cone, and a million other things you lost track of follow suit into the bottomless pit that seems to be Soobinβs stomach. He wasnβt kidding when he said he came ready to eatβ heβs plowing through the booths like itβs his last meal on Earth. Heβs gracious enough to offer you half of his portions, at least, so itβs not like heβs leaving you to starve. (youβd kill him if he did, though.) Once heβs had his fill, his lips curl up into a mischievous grin as he jabs his thumb in the direction of a different section of the market, one filled with countless games: target shooting, beanbag toss, dartsβ the row of booths seems to stretch on forever.Β
βOh, youβre on, Soob. Donβt think Iβm going easy on you because weβre on a date.β
βYeah? Donβt think Iβm going easy on you because youβre older.β
Contrary to both of your words, Soobin is absolutely fucking terrible at the beanbag toss, despite his long arms definitely giving him an advantage, and youβre no good at shooting or throwing and aiming at anything, really, so the two of you leave each booth with empty hands, though youβre laughing as if youβve hit the jackpot.
Even though you two fail spectacularly at every single game they have available, youβre suddenly aware of how much your cheeks hurt. From smiling. From laughing. When was the last time that happened on a date? Or ever, even?
Soobin ventures off on his own while youβre lost in thought, and he returns from his little solo adventure with yet another serving of tanghulu (the third one of the night: strawberry for him, tangerine for you this time). Youβre reaching out to grab the sweet from his outstretched hand, when suddenly you jump as loud popping sounds blare overhead. Thereβs a beat of silence before a flurry of colorful lights blooms in the sky, and your shoulders relax once you realize itβs just fireworks.
Youβre admiring the colors and shapes of the fireworks display as you crunch on your tanghulu, and youβre so enraptured you almost miss the feeling of someoneβs gaze on you. Almost.
When you turn to confirm your suspicions, youβre right, itβs Soobin whoβs staring at you, but heβs staring at you so intently, with such intensity, that you immediately grow flusteredβ heβs never looked at you like that beforeβ and youβre immensely thankful that the flashes of light in the sky mask the rosy hue thatβs surely staining your cheeks. Just when youβre about to swing your head away to focus your attention on the fireworks once more, his hand flies out to cradle your chin in his palm, keeping your gaze fixated on him.Β
Then heβs closing the distance, slowly but surely, fixated on you all the while to gauge your reaction, and even though youβre frozen in shock, you donβt think you wouldβve moved, anyways. Your eyes flutter shut at the last minute, nerves getting the better of you, until his lips brush against yours tentatively, as if heβs hesitating, holding back.
You meet his gaze once more, and neither of you say a word, you just nod in response to the pleading look in his eyes, as if asking your permission. He breaks out into the most beautiful smile, one that you wish you could snap a mental photo of and tuck away in a safe place in your mind, and then heβs kissing you. Actually kissing you.
He kisses you with such fervor, as if heβs been wanting to do this his whole life, and you canβt help the way you practically melt in his hold, pressing yourself against his broad figure. The fireworks display is all but forgotten, the only thing on either of your minds being the way your lips meld into each other, and the way your hands clasp together.
Soobinβs in a daze when you two finally break away for a much-needed breath, and youβre sure you look like youβre in an equally hazy state. For a moment, you two are dead silent, staring at each other, with only the sound of your soft pants and the popping of fireworks in the background to fill the silence.
Soobin is the one who breaks the silence first, smiling sheepishly as he rubs the nape of his neck. βTo be honest, Iβveβ¦ Iβve been wanting to do that for a while.β
Your eyes are as wide as saucers, and you can feel your jaw go slack in shock. Soobin had been wanting to kiss you. Soobin has thought about kissing you. Your best friend Soobin wanted to kiss you.
βWhy didnβt you?β You reply without thinking, but really, you know very well exactly why heβs never done it. Heβs your best friend, always has been, and heβd be doing much more than fucking up your friendship by kissing you before you two matched. Naturally, Soobin leaves that question unanswered, posing a question of his own instead.
βWhat made you match with me?β
βWellβ¦β You donβt know what to say. You donβt want to rattle off a list of qualities that make him desirableβ youβre already feeling flustered enough after he kissed you like that, and youβre not looking to inflate his stupid ego or risk being the butt of his teasing. But you want to be honest with him. You donβt want him thinking his suppressed desire has been one-sided all this time.
βI guess Iβve always wondered what it would be like to go on a date with you. We wouldnβt be bored, we would know how to keep each other happy, and understand each other, that kind of thingβ¦ and I was a little tired of seeing you go through all those people you didnβt click with, who didnβt get you, especially not the way I did. You know Iβve never liked the people you were seeing, and I was always annoyed by the idiots you dated in high school, and all your stupid matchesβ¦ I always thought everyone took you for granted, and no one seemed to care about actually getting to know you. I thought I was just looking out for you, caring about you, as your best friend, but maybe I was actually just jealous.β
βJealous? Really?β He looks so incredulous it embarrasses you that you have to clarify further.Β
βYes, jealousβ¦ I especially hated whatβs-her-name, Hyeji? That one student council girl who dumped you in front of the whole school.β
Soobin grimaces at the mention of her name, and you canβt help the relief you feel at his response. βUgh, her. Led me on for months because she thought I was cute and then when we started dating she nitpicked every single thing I did, all because I wasnβt the suave drama lead of her dreams and then dumped me because she couldnβt change me. You know she threw away a whole pack of my Pokemon cards because she thought it was βtoo nerdyβ?β
βSee? This is what I mean. None of your romantic partners actually seem to appreciate you as you are. And so I donβt know, something came over me, and I wanted to see if I could do a good job because IΒ know I appreciate you for who you are and now Iβm confused, and I feel like Iβve ruined our friendship forever, andββ
To your relief, Soobin doesnβt laughβ instead he cuts your rambling off with a quick kiss, and it flusters you into silence. βShh. We promised, remember?β
βI mean, we also promised each other when we were in high school that weβd settle down and raise ten dogs on a farm together.β
Soobin laughs this time. βYeah, I remember that. But this is a pinky promise, isnβt it? Itβs different.β
βYouβre rightβ¦ but itβs scary, you know? Coming to this realization about you, and thinking about you this way, and enjoying it, but also worrying about how weβre going to get out of this after our relationship expires... I donβt want to get too carried away and change our dynamic forever.β Youβre chewing the skin off your lower lip nervously (you never did break that habit, so now your lip is bleeding), and, while Soobinβs voice is gentle, you know him well enough to detect the subtle tremor as he speaks.
βI know. But weβll be okay. Weβll figure it out. I wonβt let anything remove you from my life for good. Especially not the watch.β His voice is so low, so quiet, youβd miss it if you werenβt fixated on him, as if heβs trying to convince himself, and you squeeze his hand in what you hope is an admirable attempt at reassuring him. βThe app hasnβt told us our connectionβs expired yet, so I just really, really want to give this a chance. A proper chance, so I can say I did it before I get matched with my βrealβ soulmate, or whatever. I donβt want to think about what could have been, especially not with you. I think thatβd be worse for us.β
You know exactly what he means. Harboring dormant feelings for your best friend never bodes well, at least not in the movies and the books, so you may as well get this pining out of your system, and let it become a distant memory as soon as possible, if itβs not meant to be. Itβs only fair, for both of your futures, and for your friendship. (and though neither of you want to admit it, the thought of not being each otherβs soulmates is depressing.)
βLook, Soobβ¦ I really want to give this a chance, too. I want to see where it takes us while weβre allowed to. I want to try. Itβs scary, itβs fucking terrifying, but youβre my best friend, Soob. I promise you wonβt lose me because of some stupid watch. Pinky promise.β You try to keep your voice upbeat as you hold out your pinky towards him, offering a tender smile. He links his pinky with yours, and you can see his frame visibly relax once he does.Β
You rest your head on his shoulder, pinkies still linked, and silently hope that youβll be able to uphold your promise to him. Youβve never been any good with breakups. Soobin knows that.
But youβll be okay with him, right?
Heβs your best friend, after all.
[How would you rate your date?]
[β β β β β ]
β¦
Congratulations! Your next date is scheduled for 2pm tomorrow, at the Botanical Gardens.
Soobin decided on his own that heβs picking you up for the third date, and he let you know as much.Β After last nightβs events though, this means that youβre turning your entire closet upside down trying to find the sweet spot for your look today, because your head is jumbled with far too many thoughts, all of them about Soobin. Every outfit you think up is either too dressy, or too casual, or too out there, or too bland, and you have half a mind to reschedule with your mind in the state that it is. Unfortunately for you, Soobin is already on his way, and youβre not the type of asshole to tell him to head back home and forget the whole date, so you just stare at your pile of clothes on the floor, hoping that somehow youβll be enlightened with the perfect outfit idea and get yourself looking presentable before he comes knocking.
The universe is clearly not on your side, though, because your doorbell rings not even a minute later, and all youβve picked out is your jeans and youβre still very much topless. You shoot a message to Soobin, thumbs flying frantically as you let him know youβre not quite ready yetβ he might be your best friend in the entire world, but youβre not ready for him to see you under your clothes just yet, especially now that youβre properly seeing each other.
Youβre still not sure what to wear, but you figure a beige knit sweater should be safeβ you wonβt look like youβre trying too hard, but you also wonβt look like youβre not trying at all. When you swing the door open to finally greet Soobin, your breath quite literally gets taken away, because he trips and almost knocks you over with his lanky frame, but also, heβs breathtaking.
Heβs clearly put a lot of thought into his outfit, which is very cute, and he looks absolutely stunning. A sleek black cardigan with white striped accents on the sleeve, a white dress shirt that clearly looks freshly pressedβ hell, heβs even wearing a tieβ and those godforsaken glasses that have you in a chokehold somehow. You donβt even bother hiding your delightβ heβs so beautiful, and you know he needs a little validation after he probably spent hours putting his look together.
He catches you staring wordlessly, and he flushes with embarrassment.βWhat? Too much? I knew I should have skipped on the tieββ He grumbles, making a move to loosen it, but heβs stopped by your hand over his.
βNo. You look great, Soob. Seriously.β Youβre not used to being verbally affectionate, especially not with him, but when he looks that sad, like a kicked puppy, you know better than to tease him when heβs unsure of himself. Despite that, youβre still shy as you reassure him. βYou look beautiful.β
The way he brightens when he hears your words is almost cartoonish, and this time, you canβt hold back your laughter, which earns a pout from him, which in turn only fuels your laughter further. You appease him by lacing your fingers with his (heβs apparently a lot easier to please than you remember, but maybe thatβs your imagination), and he responds by placing a kiss to the back of your hand. The gesture is tender and sweet, and you think about what itβd be like to have Soobin do that to you every day.
βWell, shall we?β He bows exaggeratedly with his free arm, giving you a blinding smile.
You mirror his smile, and playfully curtsy in return. βWe shall.β
When you two arrive at the botanical gardens, itβs jam-packed with people (a worker explains that their tulips are in full bloom, so everyoneβs vying for their social media moment), and Soobin is visibly startled, though he recovers quickly as he turns to you.Β
βYou okay? Thereβs so many people... I think this is twice, maybe even thrice as many people as there were at the night market.β You donβt do well with crowds, the crowd at the night market was probably the most you could handle, but you know that you donβt have a choiceβ you have to follow through with the date as scheduled, or risk a fine that neither of you can afford, so you just nod, your grip on his hand tightening.Β
Soobin somehow finds a slightly less crowded area of the tulip fields for you two to stroll in after doing a quick sweep (thank god for his height, and that he uses it to his advantage), but you still feel tense as you walk hand in hand. Thereβs still a decent amount of people, with more spilling in excitedly, phone cameras in hand, and you have a bad feeling the crowd will only grow in size as the day drags on. You just hope youβre as convincing an actress as you think you are, and that Soobin wonβt notice as he reads the identification cards for each flower.
Youβre caught off guard when he gently pushes you down onto a nearby bench, and crouches in front of you, clasping your other hand in his so that both of them are occupied. The concerned expression on his face tells you that youβre nowhere near an Oscar for your performance, and that heβs most definitely caught on to your discomfort. Normally youβd be embarrassed at the displayβ you hate making a scene in public, but your anxiety is getting the better of you, and itβs nice to know that he still knows you as well as you thought.
βNoonaβ¦ look. I know you donβt like crowds, especially excitable and hectic ones like these. If you really, really feel like this is too much for you, we can cancel the date and go home. I want you to have a good time, and I know itβs hard for you when thereβs so many people.β
Youβre chewing at your lower lip again, and Soobin lets go of one of your hands to thumb at your lip to stop you before you tear it open with your teeth. βBut Soob, we came all this way. And you dressed so nicely for me, for this date, and I spent all this time wanting to look good for you, and spend time with youβ¦β You trail off when your breath catches in your throat, your chin trembling as your eyes well up. βItβd be such a waste to cancel after all our time and effort.β
Once again Soobinβs thumb is gently swiping over your cheeks when the tears finally spill over, hushing you with the soft sincerity that heβs prone to when heβs not teasing you.Β
βHey, heyβ¦ we can reschedule for another day, canβt we? We donβt have to do this, noona. Thereβs always next time. It wonβt be a waste, I promise.β You feel so apologetic you could die. Soobinβs being so patient and sweet and understanding with you and here you are, kicking up a fuss. The least you could do is power through and follow through with your scheduled date, and youβd hate to miss out on this time with him that youβve been looking forward to. You were excited for this date, and you want him to know that.
βI think Iβd feel worse if we cancelled after we went through all this trouble, and especially if it was all because of meβ¦ just give me a moment to calm myself down.β Soobin nods in response, cradling your cheek in his palm, and you sigh appreciatively at the tender gesture. He doesnβt say anything as you wipe away the remnants of your tears and blow your noseβ he just holds your hand, letting you gather yourself, and you think for a moment that this must be the benefit of falling for your best friend.
Once the tears have finally subsided, and youβve had a moment to calm your nerves, you meet Soobinβs eyes, which are searching yours, as if scanning for any lingering signs of discomfort. When he canβt find any, and you give him a reassuring look and a grateful smile, he seizes the opportunity to steal a peck from your lips, grinning cheekily with his tongue between his teeth when he pulls away.Β
βH-hey! What was that for?!β Your shock and surprise is real, but your indignance certainly isnβt, if your rosy cheeks are any indication. Your discomfort is forgotten, at least temporarily, so youβre glad for that.
βOhβ¦ just because. You liked it, though.β Heβs so smug, that stupid asshole, but heβs right, so you pull him in for another quick kiss before you try to make a run for it. Unfortunately for your escape plan, youβve forgotten that your hand is still very much interlocked with his, and heβs significantly stronger than you, so he easily pulls you back into his embrace. You canβt say you mind, thoughβ heβs warm and he smells good, like jasmine and sandalwood and the faint scent of vanilla, and if you werenβt already so flustered youβd bury your face in his broad chest.
βFeeling better now?β The words fall from Soobinβs lips with a teasing lilt, but you know itβs his way of genuinely checking in on you, so you answer sincerely.
βMuch better. Though Iβd still like to avoid the crowds and find somewhere else to have our dateβ¦ if you donβt mind? The tulips are pretty, and as much as I would like to admire them too, thereβs just so many people fighting for a good photoβ¦βΒ
βOf course, I get it. I saw a sign pointing to a field of azaleas over there that is probably getting a lot less foot traffic than the tulips, so we could head over there?β He gestures in the opposite direction of the tulip field, and youβre more than happy to oblige, letting him tug you along.
Thankfully Soobinβs guess is correct, because thereβs only a handful of people at the azalea field when you two arrive, and the tension in your shoulders finally lets up. The dainty red and pink flowers have their own quaint charm, and theyβre vibrant and eye-catching. You crouch down to get a closer look, taking hold of a delicate petal in between the pads of your fingers to admire them.
βDid you know red and pink azaleas represent love and romance? Roses arenβt the only flower of love like everyone seems to think.β Soobinβs deep voice rings in your ear and you startle a little, partially because heβs way closer to you than you expected (itβs going to be a while before you get used to maintaining close proximity with him) and partially because you had no idea Soobin was just casually carrying the knowledge of flower meanings in that pretty head of his.
βTheyβre so prettyβ¦ theyβd make a much more unique gift than roses for special occasions, too. Not that thereβs anything wrong with roses, but theyβre kind of done to death, donβt you think?β
Instead of answering, Soobin looks both ways, then plucks a flower, and you hiss in disapproval at him. βHeyβ! What are you doing? The sign says that we canβt pick the flowers!β Luckily, none of the staff has taken notice of his mischievous little act, but even if they did, you canβt help but wonder if theyβd even care, when he could charm his way into anything.
Soobin tucks the flower behind your ear, seemingly ignoring your disapproval as he hums a tune under his breath. βA gift for our special occasion, and a little commemoration of our budding romance, or something. And look, noona, youβre so pretty. Just like a flower.β He punctuates his statement with the sound of his phone camera flashing, followed by four more, until youβre blushing profusely with embarrassment.
βSoobin, thatβs enoughββ Your cheeks are beet redβ you can feel it from the sheer amount of blood running into themβ and though you really like that Soobinβs taking pictures of you for him to keep, youβre extremely camera shy, and he knows that, which is probably why heβs so insistent.
βActually, the issue is that I didnβt take enough. Now smile for the camera!β You have to practically wrestle your way away from the camera, but not before he snaps a few more of you smiling bashfully at him. He catches up to you with ease (damn those long legs of his), arms secure around your frame as you squeal, though youβre secretly pleased that youβre in his hold.
The time once again ticks by like nothing as you walk side by side, admiring the blooms around you and snapping photos of each other (βFor wallpaper usage purposes,β Soobin says, and you blush again), and before you know it, your watches are beeping to signify that your two hours are up. Soobin sobers up almost immediately, expression unreadable, and though he doesnβt say anything as he takes your hand, you know whatβs on his mind, because the same thing is on yours.
Thereβs a palpable tension hanging in the air once the two of you reach the entrance of the gardensβ itβs the third date, after all, and you promised youβd find out your expiration date if you made it this far. Youβre relieved that your watches havenβt blared just yet, signifying the end of your connection, but youβre still struck with the nervousness of finding out how long youβll last. You think youβll never get over it if you only get a few monthsβ or worse, a few days with himβ after all this secret pining and yearning.
If you didnβt know any better, youβd think Soobin was somehow eerily calm about the whole thing. But you do know better, and you know that heβs just trying to put on a brave face for you, and for himself. The two of you open Time to Love in silence, hands still interlocked, swiping to the βLove Countdownβ tab with your free hands, and brace yourselves. Soobin gives you a reassuring nod, and you respond back with what you hope is an equally reassuring smile, and that your expression doesnβt betray the fear bubbling deep within you.
Soobin takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. βOkay, on the count of three,β
βOneβ¦β
βTwoβ¦β
βThree!β
When both of you tap the in-app tab, there isnβt an array of numbers indicating an expiration date with a ticking countdown, as you expected and had grown accustomed to on your previous datesβ in fact, there isnβt a single number on the screenβ and instead thereβs an infinity sign.
You two donβt have an expiration date.
You and Soobin look at each other, then at your watches, then at each other again.Β
βWait, we donβt have an expiration dateββ
Then the realization dawns on both of you, and it hits you like a truck.
βWait, weβre soulmates?!β
Both of you are sporting the same bewildered expression, and you both go to check your progress bars, just to be sureβ theyβre full, just as youβd expect after being matched with your soulmate. So thatβs why your watch alarms havenβt gone off. You two were the one in a million. Once the shock finally wears off, itβs replaced with pure, unbridled joy, and when Soobin sweeps you off your feet to gather you in his arms, thereβs an emotion bubbling in you thatβs equal parts unfamiliar and yet welcome.
Youβd thought all this time, all these years, that there was no way you should feel this way about your best friend, of all people. That you shouldnβt fuck this up, because Soobin has always been there for you, and youβve always been there for him. As his friend. As your friend.Β
But here is the universe, telling you that youβre fated to love him, and that heβs fated to love you in return.Β
And love him you do. You love Soobin. And when you look at him, and see the way heβs looking at you, with fondness practically dripping from his gaze, you know he loves you too.Β
Maybe the watch really is bullshit. Maybe it is statistically impossible to decide someoneβs life partner based on an algorithm.
But maybe itβs onto something, because it seems silly to have ever thought of being with anyone except Soobin. You never wouldβve thought to look for your forever right next to you, and yet, here he is, in the flesh. Was it a coincidence that he made it onto your recommended matches that fateful night? Was it a coincidence that he felt the same way you did?
Soobinβs lips capture yours in a searing kiss, and you melt in his heat, kissing him back with a fierce fervor, as if desperately communicating the depth of the feelings youβve let build up silently after all these years. You decide that thereβs no such thing as coincidencesβ heβs always known whatβs best for you, and youβve always wanted whatβs best for him. You just didnβt know that the answer to both of those things was each other.
βI love you, noona.β He whispers with a bashful, dimpled smile, and your heart swells.
βI love you too, Soob.β
Soobin has always been counting down to something.Β
To the end of another grueling workday, the next League of Legends patch update, to anything, so he always has something to look forward to. But heβs never looked forward to this.
The love countdown has always been something he despised and dreadedβ heβs always wanted to be the master of his own fate, without the shackles of the app tying him down with each new connection. Heβd always thought that his soulmate would be some poorly matched individual who heβd have a mediocre life with, but all that seems to be proven wrong as he looks at you.
He hates being wrong. But when he sees the way you smile, the way you regard him with the utmost love and affection in your gaze, the way you hold his hand as if youβll lose him if you let goβ he thinks heβs willing to concede defeat, at least this time.
Maybe that stupid watch does know a thing or two about love. Maybe it doesnβt. Maybe this is all just pure coincidence. But despite it all, Soobin is thankful that this is where he ends up. That both of you had been counting down all this time to each other.Β
Because if there's anyone he can count on in this world, it's you.
i have the outline all written up for like clockwork and i'm super excited to flesh it out but the challenge is going to be actually finishing it.......... (has only 1k words written) why can't i just concentrate really hard and make words appear on the screen
summary: in a world where love is given an expiration date, you find your forever home in an unexpected place.
tags: soulmate!au, best friends to lovers, mostly romance + fluff, (maybe smut if i can get myself to write it), fake dating if you squint, reader is afab w/ gender neutral pronouns + fem terms (noona) used
author's note: this is loosely based on the "hang the dj" episode from black mirror but with slightly less dystopian elements lmao.... this is my first txt fic and my first time writing in a long long while so please be kind <3 i'm not sure if i want to release this in installments or if i want to update it all at once but we'll see
For as long as Soobin can remember, heβs been counting down the days.Β
To summer vacation, to the end of his shift at his part time job, to the start of a long awaited trip, to anything. But thereβs something else that counts down on his behalf, something that he doesnβt particularly want to count.
That something is inlaid in a nondescript watch wrapped around his wrist. Everyone gets one once they turn 18, and as far as heβs concerned, its only purpose is to ruin relationships. The cruel hands of time assign a βbest byβ date to each romantic encounter, flashing on the screen from the first meeting, with each failure promising to lead the user closer and closer to their fated lover. If you ask Soobin, itβs all bullshit. How would a stupid watch know anything about fate, anyways?
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