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YOU ARE THE REASON
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@sopdet-star
Super Rich Kids (Feat. Earl Sweatshirt)-Frank Ocean
History of Magic || James + Sirius
 "Oh Paddie, I just miss you so much I canât think of anything fun to do, just pine over you."
"Oh sweet Prongsie... you'll always be my one and only." he laughed, "It's flattering that I, am the one on your mind..." he trailed, faking a happy sigh.Â
 Marlene didnât know why he was looking at her like thatâfor the moments he had been looking at her, anywayâor why her heart was beating faster than normal. She wasnât ashamed of her body, and it wasnât like nobody had ever seen it beforeâhell, James had seen her like this, though for an entirely different reason than most boys had seen her in her knickers. And Sirius isnât James, her mind reminded her, though she had no idea what she was meant to do with that.
She settled for a smile as she pulled on her trousers. No big deal, right? Heâs your friend, itâs totally cool. âNo, itâs fineâyou just startled me, is all,â she reassured him in her usual tone for himâteasing and fond with occasional exasperationâbefore internally questioning whether that tone combined with the fact that she was in her underwear constituted as flirting. She just knew that if James could see her, heâd be laughing his arse off. âAnyway,â she teased, tugging the waist band over her hips, âmaybe this can be a lessonânext time I say wait, donât come charging in?â Her voice was full of laughter, and she was totally joking, but part of her was kind of hoping he didnât find the idea of seeing in her underwear a deterrent. Not even wanting to dwell on where that came fromâitâs totally normal to kind of want attractive people to think youâre okay looking, Marlene tried to reassure herselfâshe pushed it down, and grinned st him, trying not to look too obvious as she searched for a shirt and fuck, why was it so messy in here?
Sirius shook it out of it, and tried not to stare at her. He had seen plenty of girls naked before so he wasn't sure why Marlene was different. He scratched the back of his head and looked around. He took a quick peek back at her and hoped she wouldn't notice. He bit his lip and turned away, looking at the ceiling. "You're not bad." he joked, trying to make things less awkward. She was more than- she was just a friend, Sirius.Â
"Yeah...a good lesson." he nodded. "Hey, to make this less awkward, i'll just take off my shirt." he took his off, and turned back to her. "Now you're not left out I guess." he shrugged. There you go Sirius, always making things awkward. Why can't you be casual like you are with other girls? Sirius looked around, "I thought girl's dorms were clean.." he said under his breath, observing. "I just- I thought boys were the messy ones. Not that your messy room is bad- I just- yeah."Â
 Marlene shook her head at him in faux-disappointment. âKeep on believing your delusion, Mister,â she laughed. âI know the truth.â Marlene couldnât hide her smile at being called one of his stars, but she didnât think he was looking at her, anyway. His voice seemed to trail off after Dorcas, but she put that down to her being the last on the list, dismissing it from her thoughts. âWell, Iâm glad I can help you shineâhey, reckon I can just give our names next time an Astronomy pop quiz asks for all the stars in the Canis Major constellation?â she joked, turning to smirk at him. Marlene and Sirius were playful people, but jokes or no, she knew that the memory of him saying youâre my star would be seared into her mind foreverâit filled her with an indescribable warmth that she chalked up to being due to a friend trusting her, though something in her gut seemed to rebel against that theory.
Marlene faced him, frown on her face. âHey,â she said, slightly sternly, âthatâs not true. You are definitely something to be proud of.â Sirius Black was one of the very best people she knew, and that was the sum total of his parts, flaws and allâand she just had to make him see that. And if she didnât succeed today, she would always keep trying. Marlene had a brother. He was six, very different to Regulus, but Marlene could understand how Sirius was feeling, because the very thought of leaving Matty behind made her feel sick. âI donât think youâre selfish,â she said slowly. âAt least, not in a bad wayâI think everyoneâs selfish, in a way, and itâs what you do with it that counts. And, Siriusââ here, she needed him to look at her, to understand that she meant every single wordââwalking out wasnât selfish. It sucks that Regulus is still there, okay, it sucks, because heâs left with your parents and demented cousin. And maybe itâs going to be harder, now that youâre not there, but at the same time, even when you left him, you gave him a giftâyou showed him that you can get out,â she said fiercely. âAnd itâs totally hard, and if anyone says differently, Iâll break their nose, but it is, andâfuck, yeah, heâs going to be hurt or closed off right now, but.. but heâll remember that you love him, before the end.â Marlene knew that it probably wasnât very comfortingâshe did try to be, for the people she loved, but it had never been her strength, despite being so well-likedâbut it was the truth, and sometimes that was just as important, if not more so.
It was funny that they were having this conversation, because neither were particularly talk about your feelings kind of people, but something in Sirius brought out emotions in Marlene that she didnât quite know how to clamp down yet. âHey, Iâve always got your back, buttercup,â she said in response, accompanied by a smile and the capture of his hand mid-patâshe wasnât really sure why, which was somewhat concerning, but she smirked and turned it into the pledge position she used to do with James when they were nine. Clasping his hand, palm against her own, she said with a cheeky grin, âhereâs to the Corridor Club!â Only maybe James would do thisâlying down like losers in a corridorâkind of thing with them, but she thought, eyes sparkling, that this might stay as their kind of thing.
Sirius shook his head. "You never give up, do you?" he looked over at her. He liked that she was stubborn, even if she was just joking at the moment. He let his eyes trail over her body when she wasn't noticing, and then he looked back at the ceiling. "I'm sure that would be an acceptable answer, my star." he chuckled, wishing life would always be this simple. Laying on a floor, talking about stars, and not worrying about death or what would be around the bend.Â
He swallowed air, and lifted his head slightly, "Mar.." he started to say before she continued on. He didn't feel proud, now or ever. He didn't have anything going for him, besides his looks, and the girls that wanted him, and that wouldn't get him anything in life. He closed his eyes, pain and disappointment pinging in heart. His parents cruel eyes dawned on him, and he tensed, wanting to shut them out. "Fuck- No- I can't talk about this anymore." he needed to push out his emotions. He had to distract himself, and he couldn't show he was feeling weak. Fuck Sirius do- do not mess this up. He wasn't sure what he was messing up, but it was something. He tensed some more, imaginary pain just filling him. He wasn't emotional. He was fun loving Sirius and no- god fucking fuck, he needed to stop and quiet his mind before he put his foot in his mouth.Â
"Thank you Mar." he grinned down at her, trying to let the pain reside. "To the corridor club." he echoed, his mind guilty as all get out, but there was nothing he could do about that now.Â
 She let her smirk seep into the kiss, eyebrow quirking a little. Using the hand that was in his hair, she pulled him back, eyeing him with an almost passive indifference. âYes, I could have, but Iâm a lady Black, and thats not what we do," she cracked, her smirk growing. Holding him there, she moved the hand that held her fag, leaning a foot up to put it out against it. "Now that wonât be an issue," she remarked, before pulling him back to her with a renewed vigor. Doe was five feet and ten inches, mostly leg, which was the feature Sirius chose to seek out quite often. Bringing her free hand back to where his rested on her back, she took his, sliding it under her shirt. Her robes had been shucked when she had sat down, something she was grateful for now.
"Of course." he smirked, "Shouldn't have expected a lady to do the man's job." he stroked her cheek,and stopped as she placed his hand under her shirt. He placed his other hand under her shirt as well, touching as much of her body as he could. He leaned towards her, hungering for a kiss. He smirked again,pressing his lips to hers.Â
 "Maybe? I donât maybe anything- yo most definitely would." She rolled her eyes at the nickname, taking the items sheâd picked up and laying them in his bag. "Well, a good girl with proper intentions on you would be fixing your bag. I do hope you arenât consorting yourself with anything but the best of the best. As you said, you are Sirius Black.â She said, keeping her face as stern as possible but she couldnât help but smile, âThe sticking spell may only last a day or two, so⊠figure out something to do with the poor thing.â Andromeda patted the bag, âPut the thing out of itâs misery if you canât fix it then.â
"Maybe's a good word if you're avoiding yes or no." he smirked, watching her put the items in his bag. "Thanks 'cuz." he grinned, "I only hang out with the classiest set of blood traitors and muggle borns." he teased, though being completely honest. "Dear Andromeda, you need to loosen up.." he put his hand under her chin and tapped it. "Am I the only Black that doesn't have a resting stern face?" he asked, crossing his arms and leaning against a wall. "We all need to let loose. Maybe you need some booze.We should get you some, yeah?"Â
I hate being sexy but someone has to do it [I don't need luck, I'm hot] - a sirius black playlist. {LISTEN HERE}
|| i. arctic monkeys - fluorescent adolescent || ii. one republic - everybody loves me ||  iii. the clash - should I stay or should I go || iv. ac/dc - back in black || v. fall out boy - my songs know what you did in the dark || vi. the remus lupins - young sirius blackâs flying motorcycle || vii. green day - x-kid || viii. the 1975 - sex || ix. foster the people - pumped up kicks || x.michael jackson - bad ||
History of Magic || James + Sirius
 "I thought it was an easy O but Binns just get more boring with the yearsâŠ"
"Use your Prongs charm and make the class less boring, or is that.." he dramatically paused, "Not able to happen?"Â
 "Real cute, Sirius. Nice to see your sense of humor stayed intact when your heart disappeared and you ditched."
Sirius clenched his jaw and almost growled, "It wasn't like that. How many times do I have to tell you?"Â
"People told me SLOW my rollÂ
I'm screaming out fuck that
Imma do just what I want
lookinâ ahead no turninâ BACK
If I fall if I die know I lived it to the fullest
If I fall if I die know I lived and missed some bullets"
"Hey, Lil, can you pass me my trousers, cheersâoh, fuck! I thought you were Lily!⊠and that I told you to give me a minute, you impatient goose.â
"Oh- fuck.. I mean- sorry." he scratched his head awkwardly and turned away slightly. He was so used to seeing girls in their underwear, it should have been natural.Â
"What do you want, then?"
Sorry, your heinous, I shouldn't have been expected to breathe the precious air you're standing in.Â
 She gave a soft snort of a laugh before his lips landed on hers. Holding her cigarette off to one side in her hand, she slipped her right hand to the back of his neck, holding herself. Pulling away for a moment, she gave him that mischievous smirk, âI was wondering when you would stop talking up a game and actually take action," she said, before she was brought into another kiss. This time though, she took more of an offensive, pushing back against him, hand sliding up to get a grip in his hair.
He rolled his eyes and smirked at her comment, his hands going to the small of her back. Merlin she was a good kisser, and the roughness of her actions was always a good distraction. He grinned into the kiss pulling back  to say, "Y'know, you could have started too." he grinned, one of his hands going to her thigh. Her legs were one of her best feature, and hell, anytime they slept together, looking at them bare in the flesh joyed him most.Â
 "Thatâs why I said get it mended, not mend it yourself. I couldnât leave you alone with needles and thread- youâd end up killing yourself.â She said, giving a light smile. Pulling out her wand, she waived it over the hole, the torn ends pulling loosely together with a small mumble. It was nothing more than a simple sticking spell, but she gave an exasperated sigh anyways as she put away her wand. âShouldât you have a line of girls somewhere who would kill to do this for you? I hope you arenât âfalling off your gameâ, Sirius.â
"Killing myself? I'm not that bad at things- maybe you're right..." he crossed his arms and eyed her as she mended his bag with a spell. "Don't be ridiculous Andy Dandy, I have tons of girls wanting me." he smirked, "I'm Sirius Black." he posed majestically, as if waiting for someone to crown him or something. "Why would you accuse me of something so heart breaking?" he looked at her, laughing.Â
 Marlene beamed at him, and started laughing when he said he didnât twinkle. âSirius,â she said, still giggling, âI hate to break it to you, slick, but youâre definitely a twinkler.â It was quite ironic that she was saying this, seeing as her eyes were probably dancing with amusement right now, but she couldnât help it. âItâs okay,â she said in a hushed tone, leaning slightly closer to give the air of secrecy. âI donât think the rest of them have worked out that you twinkleâIâll keep your secret,â she finished, sealing the deal with a wink.
Marlene laughed when he concurred about being the brightest star in the sky, and absent-mindedly furrowed her head into his hand, making it easier for him to play with her hair. She was pretty sure he was a little tipsy, but that was okayâSirius Black was good at making her smile, no matter his sobriety, which was kind of surprising, given how hard his life was. She mused on that when he made his comment about starsâhis family was full of stars. They were all dark stars, though, and she had no doubt that on some level, being surrounded by dark stars would only make the brightest seem brighter, but she worried, sometimes, about how hard it must be for a bright star to try shine when it was alone amidst the dark ones. She brushed that off right now; he seemed happy, right now, and she didnât want to take that from him. Usually, she would push the blunt option if she thought it was best to confront, but she didnât want to do that to Sirius. Not when seeing him just content wasnât such a common thing. âOh yeah?â she asked, in response to his comment about being surrounded by stars. âYou reckon some of us could be your stars?â she asked, small smile playing at her lips as she faced him.
Marlene shifted as he did, to get more comfortable, so now most of her body was nestled beside his, instead of perpendicular to it. She listened intently as he talked. âIt sounds hard,â she said simply, looking at him intently. âIâmy mother hasnât spoken to her family since she married Dad,â she told him. âAnd that was just because, you know, she was a Rickett, a Slytherin legacy, and she married a McKinnon. She left so she could be with dad, but youâyou left because you believe something different. And what Mum did was hard,â she said steadily, because it was, âbut what you did is even harder, and more important. And Iâm so proud of you,â she finally said. Marlene practically lived at Jamesâ in the summerâor at least, she and James alternated between their homesâso she had known Sirius had moved in literally within a day of him having done so, and ever since he had walked out, she had felt so unbearably proud of him, but she wasnât sure if sheâd ever told him. She wasnât much for talking about her feelingsâeven though they ruled her every action; she kind of reserved those talks for when she felt like a friend needed it, but she found herself genuinely wanting to tell Sirius how proud of him she was, even if this was slightly out of the realm of her general conversations. Then again, Sirius wasnât just anybody. "Iâm glad you have them," she informed him, referring to his uncle and cousin, "and us. And youâre totally rightâthe world isnât black and white, and these people asking everyone to choose a side arenât being fair, because sometimes you canât pick.â Marlene looked him in the eyes, and said, laying her hand over the one of his that was holding her, âbut the world is full of impossible choices, and we canât avoid them all. What we can do, though, is make sure we donât have to go through them alone. And I wonât let you,â she said, and her tone was fond, but also fierce, because she meant it with all her heart. âI have no intention of leaving you on your own to make that choice.â She would always have his back, though she wasnât entirely sure that it was that particular friendly instinct that had inspired her words.
Marlene gave him a startled smile. âWell,â she responded, âIâm glad Iâm here too, if I can.â She shot him a wicked grin. âI guess you kind of make me feel better too, Sirius Black,â she returned, her tone slightly teasing but her words completely sincere.
"To hell they don't. Because I don't twinkle." he laughed, looking down at her. Being like this was comfortable, and not just in a sense he was relaxed, but just all together comfortable. He laughed at her wink and rested his head against the floor, watching the ceiling. He didn't want to think about things or worry, but it was definitely happening. He decided not to talk about it, because he wasn't up for a pity party, or to make Marlene worried.Â
He closed his mind of it all, and distracted himself with the present. "Of course. You're my star, James, Remus, Peter, Andromeda, Dorcas.." he listed, wondering how Marlene would feel if she knew he and Dorcas had been friends with a tendency to sleep together when things were shabby. He didn't want to think of that either, and pushed it away like the rest. He had trouble with dealing with his problems and feelings and all of it really just hurt after it snowballed.Â
He sighed, not seeming to get any rest from his mind. "I- I'm nothing to be proud of. I'm selfish, and I didn't even bring Regulus with me..." It hanged him, that he left his little brother in the hands of their cruel parents. He could feel tears forming in his eyes and he knew he had to suck them back in, and did for Marlene's sake and his own. "It's so damn difficult, but i'm glad you're here." he patted her hand, not wanting to respond to the rest in fear he'd lose control of him emotions. It usually was easy but with Marlene, they wanted to come out for some reason.Â
"Oh, what a pity." She stops suddenly in her tracks as books and quills spilled out of the bag in front of her. Instinctively, she swoops down to pick up the fallen items closest to her. "You need to get your bag mended, no excuses. Here-â
"Mend a bag?" he raised an eyebrow, "I can't do that. I mean, I can't even survive potions without burning the place down." He pouted, holding the end of his bag so nothing else fell out.Â