[teathattast]

[flightyquinn]

[nerdylittlebugcreature]

fiddlefords name was a prophecy and boy did he live up to that

[joeyclaire]

french jason derulo be like. jason deruleaux

[joeyclaire]

wait

WHAT

[valtsv]

"missed all of your vital organs" is such a scathing injury report if that happened to me i would never let the person who maimed me live it down. you had a 1 in 7 chance and more than 50% of my body's surface area to target and you fucking blew it. cope and seethe over my unperforated heart, lungs, brain, liver, kidneys, pancreas, small intestine and large intestine you fucking idiot. you incompetent fool.

[captainkirkk]

Ok but Zuko using the knowledge he acquired during his banishment to help him as the Fire Lord. Like making small talk with Earth Kingdom dignitaries about their local foods that he enjoyed and even misses. Like having in-depth conversations with his captains about sea currents and navigation. Like, in the middle of a meeting with several high-ranking naval officials, pointing out flails in security, like how a person can cling to a Fire Nation ship for hours at a time, or climb aboard using hatches on the upper decks, or disguise themselves as a lower ranking guard with easily accessible spare armour….

Though none of his experiences can prepare Zuko for the long, awkward silence that comes after he admits to doing or at least knowing something illegal and/or completely buck wild

[cinthi-lante]

fire lord zuko: you should maybe revisit the security measures around the water ducts that the sealturtles use

northern water tribe leader: that’s not necessary, no one can survive submerged in the artic ocean for so many minutes

zuko:

zuko: remember that time the fire nation attacked you

[chucktaylorupset]

Zuko: okay first you have to promise not to get mad

[kamen-rider-zed]

Earth King: Tell me about your first visit to Ba Sing Se.

Zuko:

[elidyce]

Okay, but before all this:

Advisors: Princess Azula did perform the astounding feat of infiltrating Ba Sing Se…

Zuko: Huh? Oh, that’s not hard. It’s pretty nice, if you don’t mind the brainwashing, but you can’t get a spicy octopus for love or money. We ate so much jook. *shudders*

Advisors:… you got in too…. interesting.

*

Advisors: The mysterious Water Tribe city at the North Pole

Zuko: It’s a pretty place, if you like ice.  Lots of sealturtles. They have a really nice little sort of sacred grove thing there, too, I kidnapped the Avatar from it once.

Advisors: …. we have some questions….

*

Advisors: We still have not found the Fire Lord’s secret supplier of new weapons - 

Zuko: He’s at the Northern Air Temple. (Realizing they’re all staring at him) Oh, no, I haven’t met him personally, but I have friends who have. He sounds like a very interesting guy.

Advisors: SO MANY QUESTIONS

*

Zuko: (while directing post-war reparation efforts) Oh, and we need to send a lot of people to work on replanting the forest around this obscure village.

Advisors:…. may we ask why?

Zuko: Apparently the local panda spirit is pretty mad about having its forest burned down. 

Advisors, now afraid to ask: ….Yes, Fire Lord. 

*

Every now and then, the curiosity gets too much and they’ll bring up something like ‘legendary sand benders’ or ‘Southern Islands’ and Zuko invariably produces some tidbit of local knowledge (either his own or gleaned from the Gaang’s stories) and six Foreign Ministers have resigned in fear and the seventh one only barely held it together when Zuko greeted an envoy from a tiny, insignificant Earth Kingdom island with ‘Listen, I am really sorry about what happened last time, I hope the supplies I sent helped with the rebuilding, do you still have that giant eel thing?” IS THERE ANYTHING HE DOESN’T KNOW.

[knittingandscience]

Advisor: Before we start the meeting, I’d like to address the anniversary of Captain Zhao’s mysterious disappearance…

Zuko: At least he died doing what he loved?

Advisor: What do you mean, died?

[outcasts-redeemer]

Adviser: “There still has been no word about the whereabouts of the vigilante known as the Blue Spirit. The last reported sighting was in Ba Sing Se. It is imperative we find more information about him.”

Zuko: “Oh you’re still looking into that?”

Adviser: “He is a wanted criminal in both the Earth Kingdom and Fire Nation for espionage, theft, assault and battery, breaking and entering and breaking numerous other local laws and customs.”

Zuko: “Huh when you put it like that it does sound pretty bad.”

Adviser: “My Lord, surly you heard of him and his crimes.”

Zuko: “Of course I heard of him. Its just… I mean considering all the good he did. His heart was in the right place?”

Adviser: “…”

Zuko: “Ok, so don’t get mad…”

[alicent-florent]

BARBIE (2023) dir. Greta Gerwig

[shortkingzuko]

idk what’s funnier: hakoda and bato struggling to come out to sokka and katara, because they’re both so worried that the kids will take it badly and oh god what if they think i’m trying to replace kya?? and stressing about it for MONTHS and then when they finally come out, katara and sokka are both like: yeh…. we know…. you’ve been dating each other since we were like 15, how could we not know?

OR if hakoda and bato are like “oh the kids DEF know we’re together, we live together, we share chief duties, we’ve raised the kids together, they totally know we’re dating ! :)” and then at some point they tell the siblings that they’re getting married and sokka and katara are like “okay but to whom?”

“?? to each other??”

“YOU’RE DATING?”

“we… we live together… we live together in a one bedroom igloo… you’ve SEEN our bedroom there’s only one bed?”

[enbyzukostanblog]

Consider this: one sibling Knows while the other is like Probably Not

[alfredo-zauce]

I considered and raise you instead: neither sibling realizes but the rest of the Gaang does

[rwoh]

Zuko: yes I was talking to your dads-

Sokka: dads, plural? I only have one dad.

Zuko, trying to work out if he misread the situation with Bato and Hakoda:

[nxy]

i cant believe they let two 12 year olds and a goat travel across the country with thousands of monsters who wants to kill them ??????? what even

[ryanthehan-deactivated20230820]

Never give context

[windflowermary]

mlw ships where the man is entirely head over heels in love with the woman and cannot even fathom genuinely being in love with anyone else and is so painfully in love with her that it makes him look so stupid

[thxcrxelprincxss]

[clockworkbee]

I know it's cliché when character A is consumed by the dark or darkness but then they recognize character B or their voice keeps them grounded but I eat that shit up every. single. time.

[eternallovers65]

Fred Prinze Jr's Fred walked so Ryan Gosling's Ken could run

[the-a-j-universe]

That's just the same man again.

[azrakon]

[the-grand-author-ne]

[todaysbird]

fun fact about me: When I was 6 years old I sent so much hate mail to the president (the second Bush) that the mail carrier had to tell my mom I needed to stop before we got FBI’d

[todaysbird]

I was COMPLETELY unaware of the US political scene or why the adults in my life hated Bush, but I knew I hated him because he let people shoot wolves from helicopters and that’s mean and shitty

[todaysbird]

I also had a poor grasp on how stamps worked, so given that I wasn’t allowed to continually throw money away by putting stamps on my presidential hate mail, a lot of the times I just drew squares with little pictures inside on the corner.

[fantasticait]

Love, love, love reading more proof that everyone should encourage the children in their lives to write to elected officials--it teaches them about citizenship and can also be very funny.

When I taught second grade, one of the options for students who had finished their work was to write a letter to the president. I would send all of the letters in a big envelope at the end of every month.

Watching my students get more and more frustrated with him (and concerned about his wellbeing) was not the result I'd hoped for when I came up with the idea, but it was kind of hilarious.

See, Obama had a standard packet with information and activities about his dog he'd send in response to letters from very young citizens...and of course his office sent one back to our class every single time we sent mail.

So eventually all of the letters looked something like this:

Dear President Obama, I am writing about the environment. I am sad that the Great Barrier Reef is hurt. Also the Amazon Rainforest. Can you help? PLEASE DON'T WRITE BACK TO TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DOG AGAIN. WE ALREADY KNOW ALL ABOUT BO. WE COMPLETED THE MAZE AND COLORED HIM IN. It is good that you love your pet a lot. But try to remember the environment. It is also important.

[paradoxical-question]

The devil works hard, but the volunteers who run Ao3 work so much harder

[lovetheriddlesthatyouspeak]

[discodeerdiary]

Girls will say "I just need to lie down for a little while" and then sink into a muddy river and get all their hard.tissues replaced with mineral deposits