Howdy! I'm lukka / Ale
Any pronouns are fine but prefer he/him
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@spam-extemporal
Howdy! I'm lukka / Ale
Any pronouns are fine but prefer he/him
Mostly dcxdp nowadays, but this used to be a one piece blog
I think Rocky hates Markiplier
He hates Markiplier because no two Eridians have the same name, and Grace has not thought to clarify that the Mark who's dating his ex is not the only Mark on Earth
Interviewer, catching Damian in costume: Robin! Can you explain the process of picking up Robin or passing on the mantle?
Damian, mildly annoyed at Bruce at the moment: It's quite simple. Batmam steals young children from their bed, usually nine or ten or so. Then he takes you to his lair and give you a deal.
Damian: If you can beat him in a game of your choosing, he will train you to be Robin. If you lose, you are eaten. I beat him in a classic fencing game. He's quite good with swords, but he wasn't very good with the sport itself.
Tim, standing next to him: Yeah, I beat him at a memory card game. I like totally cheated, but I'm too old for him to eat now, so ot doesn't matter.
Damian, nodding: Yes. The worst part of the job is disposing of failed Robins bones. He usually sucks them clean and leaves them all over the floor.
Tim: Yeah, its messy. But after you hit, like 15 he stops trying to eat you, so that's cool.
Damian: I have not yet reached 15. I'm still in danger. If you have more questions, ask Nightwing, as he was the first to avoid being eaten.
-
Same interviewer, at a different date: Mr. Nightwing. Is it true Batman tries to eat potential Robins?
Dick, who has no idea what she's taking about: Yeah, it's really scary. His jaw unhinges like a snake.
Love the soft, curious moments of them sharing about their own cultures, biology, etc. I do think Rocky would have a field day when Grace explains skin as a very sensitive and permeable organ with lots of stuff packed tight on the surface. Since goosebumps are very tactile, I thought Rocky would enjoy hearing those.
Also, bonus.
Because it is endlessly entertaining to me to consider how deep in the trenches Rocky is.
the best part of field trip experiments is a chance to become THE experiment yourself ;)
I was curious about the math on this because... they're made from rocks and their atmosphere is way higher pressure than ours. But I think the math works out!!
Assumptions:
Air at 29 atm and 230C has a density of only 0.02 g/cm2, which is essentially 0
Water is 1 g/cm2
Eridians are 5 g/cm2 (rocks are 2-3 and metals are 5-12 so I'm going with a funky average with nice numbers)
xenonite is the same density as Eridians
xenonite barrier is 2% of the radius of the ball (1cm for a 1m ball)
I can do all my calculations assuming Earth gravity because bouyancy/weight would both be affected equally by the double gravity, thus cancelling out
We can estimate the radius of a pebble by picturing them loafing cutely into their carapace
In order to float, the ball has to be less dense than water; however, water displacement is directly related to density, so
to be comic-accurate, we're looking for the balls (with pebbles inside them) to be roughly 20-50% as dense as water.
Let's start with the xenonite shell:
% of ball that is xenonite = (volume of outer shell - volume of inner shell)/(volume of outer shell)
= [(4/3)πr{outer}^3 - (4/3)πr{inner}^3]/[(4/3)πr{outer}^3]
= 1 - (r{inner}/r{outer})^3
= 1 - (0.98)^3 = 6%
So the density of the ball alone is roughly:
6% x 5g/cm3 + 94% x 0g/cm3 = 0.29 g/cm3
We're already pretty much there without adding a pebble!
Now let's see what radius pebble we'd need to get to 0.5 g/cm3:
[% of volume taken up by pebble] x [density of pebble] + [% xenonite x density xenonite] + [% air x density air] = 0.5g/cm3
% of volume taken up by pebble = (0.5 - 0.29)/5
= 4% of the total ball volume
What a cute little pebble!!
but remember volume scales by radius cubed.
% of ball is pebble = volume of pebble/volume of ball
= [(4/3)πr{pebble}^3]/[(4/3)πr{outer}^3]
= [r{pebble}/r{outer}]^3
0.04^(1/3) = r{pebble}/r{outer}
...so the radius of the pebble is about 35% the radius of the ball!
To find the maximum size of a pebble that can float, let's say the density of the entire ball has to be 0.95 instead of 0.5:
% of volume taken up by pebble = (0.95 - 0.29)/5 = 13%
13%^(1/3) = 50%
However, this would mean they'd be mostly underwater (like an iceberg)
So the pebble has to use a ball that is at least 3 (for safety) times taller than its loaf height in order to float!!
(2-3 for safety if they have a low density like a rock, 5-6 for safety if they have a high density like a metal)
oh my god thank you so much for doing the actual math about it 🥹🥹🥹🥹 it is so important for me to know the pebbles can actually float!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️
like seriously I thought it was a silly little comic that won't get much attention so I decided to feel a little guilty and force myself to handwave the science for that cartoon cuteness sake. now that it got A LOT of attention I was seriously starting getting worried 😅
but now I can bask in the vision of Pebbles just being accidentally gifted the biggest bouncy castle on the planet xD (I know they won't be able to bounce like that either. best they would get is like reverse cannon ball? with the help of Grace but screw it lol) that poor Grace as the only bouyant guy in 16 light years radius has to fish them out of ;P
stratt and grace and the rest of the phm science team running on 4 cumulative hours of sleep at an unscheduled conference. dimitri and lokken are trying to explain a new complication in the hail mary's fueling system and the resources necessary to iron it out but they keep getting interrupted by government officials butting in until grace (who doesn't even look up from his laptop and checked out of the conversation two days ago) snaps "we raise our hands to speak"
complete silence for like 3 seconds. the french prime minister sheepishly raises his hand and stratt smiles for the first time that week (grace buries his entire head behind his laptop screen for wont of a better option, like jumping straight into the sea)
just you and me...and our...dog?
Two eridians and their wet dog
concept: no astrophage au where eridians and humans still make first contact but like, properly. a whole diplomatic mission meeting in the middle of space to save travel time. stratt is humanity's greatest representation. the eridian equivalent is equally as scary and secretly soft. it's all very star trek.
but rocky and grace put the whole diplomacy thing in jeopardy by being too best buddy with it. like they're both really low level members of the mission. some engineer necessary for ship maintenance, and an obligatory molecular biologist they brought along in case they found more alien cells out in space. and these two guys like, somehow keep ending up hanging out essentially "at the back of the classroom." consistently left out of the actually important negotiations, and well, they're bored!
grace steals some laptops and starts jury-rigging his own personal translator for rocky, despite the fact that the official translation software is way quicker to learn and much more nuanced. rocky starts learning english, simplifies his eridian, and immediately starts mocking grace for needing the software. they start blabbing to each other about all the weird quirks of their respective cultures and advanced science their planets can do. the whole time they are ribbing each other about culture stuff. grace eats in front of rocky. rocky forces grace to sleep in a corridor somewhere so he can keep watch.
then stratt and the eridian leader find out and it's like
stratt: you. you've been meeting in private with a member of the eridian deligation?
grace: ... yyyes.
stratt: and you shared with them classified scientific documents?
grace: i... maybe gave him. a laptop. he's so smart! what was i supposed to do?
stratt: HIM? you've assigned male pronouns to a genderless species?
grace: he said he likes to match!
stratt: do you even know the name of this eridian?!
grace: i call him rocky :)
stratt: 😰
then on rocky's side of things it's like
eridian leader: sorry did you say you called the human after one of its digestive noises?
rocky: yeah :)
eridian leader: and. you've been telling it about how to make xenonite. one of our most vital trading resources.
rocky: yes yes, grace is very ignorant about basic chemistry 🙄
eridian leader: right. and you watch it sleep. despite the fact that all the human beings we have spoken to have described this as a cultural violation?
rocky: well he didn't like it at first but he came around!!
anyway both sides of the delegation are sweating profusely (metaphorically speaking) until they see rocky and grace in action and are like ohh! they're both freaks. we are not to blame for this. these two are just really bad at navigating cultural norms.
cut to grace curled up with rocky while he sleeps like a baby.
Rocky and Grace during the very important diplomatic meetings between their species.
can i write this please.
Danny: 3 medium pizzas and a liter of-
Duke, breathless: Oh wow, you're glowing.
Danny: *blushes bright red and ducks his head*
Tim: Wow~
Steph: *wolf whistles*
Jason: Who knew day-job was so bold!
Duke, blushing: No! I didn't mean- I mean you are very p-pretty! But-But I meant! I meant-
Danny: *slowly getting redder and redder*
Damian, sighing: *walks past Duke, grabs their order, shoves a very generous tip into Danny's hand, and shuts the door before Duke can embarass himself further* That was disgusting to watch.
Rest of the BatSibs: *laughing histerically*
grace who thinks adrian hates him but adrian is just suffering from the worst case of cuteness aggression ever to exist.
grace : rocky…… do you think adrian hates me…?
rocky, who had to listen to adrians squealing before and after everytime they get to visit grace : no definitely not
Superman: We took a vote and think it's best if Batman leads the negotiations with the Ghost King
Batman: ....
Green Lantern: What? Why? No offense, Batman, but he's not the social type, especially for something this delicate.
Wonder Woman: We figured it be best if two supernatural beings discuss. To find common ground.
Flash: Ohhhh, that makes sense.
Aquaman: It is a wise tactic.
Green Arrow: *nodding* Two scary otherworldly beings would be best. At the very least Bats wont be intimidated by the Ghost King.
Martian Manhunter: Does this mean we send in Batman alone?
Superman: Thats the plan.
Batman mentally: What the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck. I'm so fucked. Why are they doing this to me? I don't even have powers!
Batman out loud: I will complete this mission.
Wonder Woman: I admire how unfazed you are. It's inspiring.
Tim: I know you feed on emotions.
Danny: I beg your pardon?
Tim: I know you feed on emotions. You're an ecto-being, known as Phantom, and you're hiding in Gotham from the government. Your real name is Daniel Fenton.
Danny defeated: Who are you working for? How did they find me?
Tim: Don't worry about that. I'm the only one who knows. Listen, I need your emotional eating abilities. Robin died a few weeks ago, and Batman is losing it. Could you eat his sorrow? Help cut through his fog of grief?
Danny: I- ugh I never tried that?
Tim: Well, now is a good chance to try. Pack your bags, you're moving into Drake Manor as my uncle, and we're going to save Batman.
Danny: Okay?
Tim: You seemed confused. Do I need to explain the plan again?
Danny: I'm not confused. I didn't expect this when I opened the door to a seven-year-old.
Tim: I'm thirteen.
Danny: I'm so sorry. Are you not being feed?
Tim: Everyone blooms at their own time!
Danny: Sure, buddy.
Tim: You-! You will actually do really well at posing as an annoying uncle. You're on thin ice, though. So watch it.
Danny: I'll take that threat more seriously when you can reach my chin.
Tim: How dare you.
Alfred: And this is the main sitting room. It's the one the family uses most, so always make sure to keep blankets and slippers in this cabinet.
Danny: Yes, sir.
Alfred: It helps to drop off a plate of snacks on Fridays. The children love it.
Danny: Are there any dietary restrictions I should know about?
Alfred: Master Tim is allergic to shellfish, and Master Damian is lactose intolerant. Miss Cass tends to avoid gluten-
Bruce: Ugh? Alfred who is this?
Alfred: Oh, Master Bruce. I didn't see you there. This is Daniel Fenton. My great-grandson.
Bruce: I- your what?
Alfred: My great-grandson. You remember my daughter, right? She had a child when she was fifteen that I never knew about. She put the girl up for adoption under my ex-wife's insistence. That child was Madeline, who went on to have children of her own. Daniel, here, is her youngest.
Bruce: I see. It's wonderful to meet you, Daniel.
Danny: You can call me Danny. Thank you for letting me stay here.
Bruce: Oh, of course. *shooting Alfred a confused look*
Alfred: Danny is a a situation green four.
Danny: I'm a what? What does that mean?
Bruce: You're part of this household now. That's what that means. Want me to show you around?
Danny: ugh, no, Great-Grandfather is already doing that.
Bruce: Alright! Have fun! I have some work to do but let me know if you need me. *walks away*
Danny: Did he seem nervous to you?
Alfred: No, he looks like that all the time. Master Bruce has a reputation you can say.
Danny heard everything about airhead Brucie: I guess that makes sense.
Meanwhile in Bruce's office:
Bruce hiding under his desk calling Dick: I'm serious. Alfred called him a situation green four!
Dick: *horrified gasp* Are you safe?
Bruce: Probably. The boy is young. I think Alfred is going to sick him onto Tim or Duke.
Dick: B. Listen to me. Get out of there. Get out of there now. I'll warn Tim and Duke.
Bruce crying: I thought Alfred stopped trying to marry us off, and now he brought his own flesh and blood to trap us in marriage!
When you meet Edward Elric he gives off the impression that he's the short-tempered hot-headed "violence is the answer to all life's questions" kind of protagonist, and it's in fact incredible character craft that he's actually the character who ends the series with a negative-3 kill count.
people killed: 0
direct orders of "you really really need to kill this guy" ignored: 1
ongoing murders being committed by Ed's own friends/colleagues that Ed got in the way of to specifically stop that murder from happening: 2
God's worst soldier Edward Elric. Showed up as the youngest member of the Amestrian army, took millions of dollars from them, never followed a single order, helped dismantle their fascist regime, left with a lower kill count than he arrived with, then fucked off to go be a house-husband. Character of all time.
You know, when you said "negative-3 kill count," I, who haven't seen the anime, thought, "He resurrected 3 people?????" But I'm seeing here on the wiki that apparently resurrection in this anime is a terrible idea.
Official addition to this post.
I would give an arm and maybe a leg to see the PHM characters in your artstyle (no pressure)
PUT YOUR LIMBS BACK AND HOLD THIS INSTEAD
(links // tip jar!)