Yeehaw

Hi, I’m marzipan!

[livingincolorsagain]

has anyone figured out how to stop being so fucking tired all the fucking time

[capnsoapy]

people will have double-digit opinions on kink discourse and still manage to not know what BDSM stands for

[play-now-my-lord]

big dick super mario

[capnsoapy]

big dick super mario

[lustcannibalism]

they should invent a way for me to do tasks without the mind torture

[lustcannibalism]

there is a world out there I can’t comprehend

[typecasto]

behold, context

[toweringclam]

[lowpawly]

this is my impression of what it would look like if the toddlers at my job could make traumacore edits about me

[kleefkruid]

saying cats don't contribute to the household is slander: they do have a job and it's going into mystery crevices and collecting all the cobwebs on their stupid little head

[sludgebitch]

"🥪" is shorthand for "🍞🧀🍅🥬🍞"

[sludgebitch]

can you people stop reblogging this my notes look like lunchtime

[hungwy]

Smash or pass: the sexy tuna guy from the starkist cans

[hungwy]

Fuck marry kill: green giant, sexy tuna, mr clean

[hungwy]

You are NOT allowed to kill mr clean

[corvuscrew-deactivated20230509]

This is obvious, kill the sexy tuna because that’s just weird, fuck Mr clean because he’s ripped and you know you won’t catch anything, now here you might think marry Mr clean because he’ll clean the house, but no, his cleanliness standards would be unbearable.

marry the green giant, making you basically a pagan god through marriage, and he can probably make vegetables grow using magic and as a vegan I need that, dick probably too big to do anything with but like, pagan marriages can be poly I think

[hungwy]

I want you to know you are so powerful to be able to begin with “this is obvious”

[thebootydiaries]

[faketop-deactivated20201219]

sir those are my 11pm whole wheat emotional support crackers.......

[babyanimalgifs]

why is my pencil talking

[setheverman]

why is your cat full of star wars sound effects

[broadwaybuttz-deactivated202306]

Why does that scarf sound like a squeaky toy?

[webscene-remade]

[weedcellar]

Eminem isn’t violent, Slim Shady is. Get it right.

[kimbras-deactivated20150415]

[hoebutmadefashion]

im robbing a bank tomorrow and when the cops come for me imma tell them it was my alter ego countess boochie flagrante

[mosticonicposts]

certified iconic post

[whynotfabulous]

what am i doing with my life?

[rigormqrtis]

[the-greentext-guy]

[fuckstev-deactivated20240104]

breaking news: my girlfriend just murdered me

[fuckstev-deactivated20240104]

[beesmygod]

[gets down on on knee] oppa…marriage style?

[cyberpigeon]

it’s 2016 not 2012

[beesmygod]

oppa rude style :(