Sporadic Erratic

A plethora of things I find interesting most likely peppered with observations and a bit of whining.

[importantcatpics]

[comicgeekscomicgeek]

Let’s have technical difficulties with mama

[voidsetup1]

and out of the darkness - you you you you you

[oeing-oeing-clay]

wow dude jts so awesome that your car is loud as fuck and smells worse when it drives past. thags fucking epic man. i really like how it hurts to listen to you drive past and it scares people. thats awesome man. i really like your car that makes a loud as fuck fart sound. fucking epic dude

[xanaxfarts]

[memewhore]

[bananahomo]

I reblogged this last month, tagged it, and said “might as well see if it works.” I used this video as a reference to find all the forms that i needed (which is A LOT, especially if you’re a dependent) and sent them through the mail, not really allowing myself to hope.

dude.

$2,714 of medical debt from my top surgery - gone. im shaking this was such a weight on me for 2 years and it fucking worked. what the fuck.

[minakittengaming]

This is huge. Sharing for my US friendos.

[zillyblog]

Hospitals like to hide these policies under a lot of successive links in obscure places, so if you don't see anything right away, keep looking! Get friends to help! Make it a scavenger hunt. A game where you're assassins sent to slit capitalism's throat

[mlarayoukai-archive]

"this thing is rare and only affects 1% of the population" dude that's 80 million people can you shut up

[gogeyama]

[thestuffedalligator]

I’m going to level with you. I have listened to The Devil Went Down to Georgia for most of my life. We were a country music household, this was a staple of my childhood along with Johnny Cash, Garth Brooks, and that one Chipmunks country album.

I have no idea what “Fire on the mountain run boys run/The Devil's in the house of the rising sun/Chicken in the bread pan picking out dough/Granny does your dog bite no child no” means and at this point I’m too scared to ask.

[dementian]

For once I can be of assistance.

Each of the lyrics comes from an old-time hickory song for fiddles, and is a lyric from that corresponding song.

"Fire on the Mountain" --> "Fire on the Mountain, run boys run"

Fire On The Mountain - Fiddle Player POV

"The House of the Rising Sun" --> "The Devil's in the house of the rising sun"

House of the Rising Sun

"Ida Red" --> "Chicken in the bread pan peckin' out dough"

Ida Red - Bob Wills & His Texas Playboys

"Granny Will Your Dog Bite" --> "Granny does your dog bite? 'No child, no'."

FTC #149 Granny Will Your Dog Bite

And for your furthered education, The Mountain Whipporwill.

Mountain Whippoorwill (aka How Hillbilly Jim Won the Great Fiddler's Prize)

[impossiblepackage]

this is the key part of the song, that a lot of people miss. people have this misconception that the contest between Johnny and The Devil is about who is the better fiddle player. but it isn't. its about who is the better fiddler.

in a time before things like radios and record players, every time you heard music was because there was somebody in the room with you playing an instrument. and many, many, many social events involved dancing, which requires music. so, if you're planning any kind of gathering in the american south or appalachia, you need to find a fiddler. and the fiddler's job is to play music that everybody knows and likes and can dance to.

the mistake The Devil makes in his bet with Johnny is that he misinterprets the contest as being about technical ability, so he has this big flashy song. he plays fast and impressively with a band of demons playing unfamiliar instruments in unfamiliar rhythms. he's definitely more skilled at playing than Johnny, and thinks he has it in the bag.

but Johnny wins because the contest is about being the best fiddler. the song uses these lines mentioned above as a shorthand for saying that Johnny is playing these songs. Johnny launches into a set of the most popular songs, played well, and that's what gives him his big win. A good fiddler knows all the hits, and can read the room to know what to play next. The Devil loses because he completely fails to read the room, and doesn't know the right songs.

[yellow-cat]

do u think i can go for a run today or is that something only normal people are allowed to do

[thisisdogs]

weird animals run all the time dude

[yellow-cat]

im going to go for a scamper and scare everyone

[orcboxer]

honestly "oracle that nobody believes" is such a solid trope. imagine trying to convince anybody in 2006 what the next two decades was gonna look like

[orcboxer]

Cassandra: I have seen the future and it is really, really stupid. They're hiding in the fucking horse.

[tlirsgender]

They don't tell you this but besides the Beloved Mutual there's also the Longterm Follower who you don't follow back but they're always in your notes and you're kind of watching them. Checking on the longterm follower's bio every so often like turning over a log. She's trans now good for her

[tlirsgender]

Longterm followers I am putting fresh leaves and hrt in your enclosure

[yotzuyu]

[arachnerd-8-legs]

prev: #u forgot the best part#the artist figured out the gig and was like#i draw for u for the rest of my life#these chinese netizens are having shojou level romances

[tevyaa]

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[porterr-robinson]

[nightmare-grass]

Why is this the funniest thing I’ve ever seen

[wasdplz]

can’t remember if i’ve reblogged this before but i stumbled across it again at 9pm and am sitting here cryIN G, SO

[ink--poison]

How the fuck did the entire internet’s sense of humor make one hell of a 180 in 7 years?

[crittizen]

Okay but I love how “me and the boys at 2 am looking for BEANS” actually became a meme after this video.

[shadow-banned-the-hedgehog]

[dirt-mann]

"without modifying" how dare you insult the hard work of our landlords

[beardedmrbean]

[blogofex]

These guys would be the biggest hit at any Renaissance fair they went to.

[therobotmonster]

An envoy from a kingdom in the far East comes to your hamlet and of course you give them a warm welcome!

Do you have any idea what access to the spice road would do for the tiny Dukedom of Fairground By the Budget Hilton?

[penandinkprincess]

it obviously makes sense, but one of my friend’s kids is going into swim class, and all the parents got an email today going, “when little ones are scared, they cling on to instructors. PLEASE trim their nails.” 

i don’t know why that’s so funny to me, but just. the idea of this poor, scratched swim instructor having to make sure to email before each class as a reminder to please declaw the children SENT me. 

[rockitcat]

When I taught swim lessons I remember trying to delicately ask parents not to cover their child in shea/coconut/olive oil before lessons.

“I understand your skincare regimen and wanting to protect their tender baby flesh from the pool chemicals, but COULD YOU NOT OIL YOUR CHILD LIKE A GREASED PIG before tossing them in the POOL? Thanks EVER so much!”

[penandinkprincess]

@nakimochiku i CACKLED