There's a lot to unpack here, but I'm finally starting to feel a little more comfortable in this new realm.
So, I do not wake up in the tavern like I expected to. Instead, I wake up just before the suns have come over the horizon in a bed and room I've never seen before. I've no idea how the tiefling lady managed to move me without waking me up, but I find I'm uncomfortably warm under this blanket. I tear it off and find breakfast on the side table with a note. I grab the note, remember "oh yeah, I'm not in Thera anymore" and write "thanks" back in Theran.
Maybe she'll get that I couldn't read it.
I head out and do my morning routine, like usual. It's nice to do my own thing without anyone stopping me and asking questions while also getting a good layout of the village. I mean, I don't know what anything is, and it's definitely not Solara, but it's not bad.
I come back to the room and eat breakfast, which is also interesting. It consists of a white, grainy soup, some bread covered in sauce, and some berries. I explore the room a bit more, but there's really nothing here. Except the blanket. It's still warm, and not just been slept in warm, but like it's producing its own heat. Super nifty!
After I mess with that a bit, I go through my things and sort them out. I drop all the shiny gems into the coin purse thing but as I drop the last one, I realize it doesn't make any noise. I peek inside and find it completely empty. I turn it upside down, but nothing comes out. I've no idea how much I lost, but I hate the idea that I have to pay for things anyway so... I decide it's a bad item to have and bury the coin purse somewhere deep in my bag and head out.
I make my way to the old guy's house and place the lantern on the porch before inspecting the fence. Seems like Mugen and Dirt Guy finished it without me. How in pitch black darkness, I've no idea, but whatever, it's done. Looks fine to me. Then I forget where the guard guy said he'd be. Figure it's a good time to check out Mugen's home and see if they can show me where the guard's place is.
I run into Mugen on the way and ask him where the guard's place is and he shows me. He tries to hide from anyone that passes by, so I pretend he doesn't exist when that happens, entertained that he's trying so hard to hide. He takes me to the guard place where the guard hands me some shiny grey stones for the fence job. I pocket the stones and ask what else he has for odd jobs. He motions towards a wall covered in papers that I, no surprise, can't read, and tells me to pick something. So I just kinda look around and pick a random one and slap it down on the table.
"How about this? What is it anyway?"
He kinda stares me down for a while, confused, and says that it's some sort of wanted poster. So I clarify that I don't have to kill the guy to get the reward, which is the plan. I don't kill people. I'll fight with them, but I won't kill them. Unfortunately this means I need a sword. Generally people don't like to get taken in so easily.
The guard explains that the guy should be in the next closest town and I'll want to travel there. I remember the tiefling saying that people don't really travel around here, so I figure I'll want to talk to Mugen and Dirt Guy about it to see if they know how we should get to the next town over to catch this guy.
I take the wanted poster, a map, and leave.
Since we're missing a party member, Mugen and I return to his house to go and collect Dirt Guy. We get there and Mugen claims that Dirt Guy isn't there, without ever checking the house. I don't really believe he can just know that and barge in searching for him. I check all the rooms and find a few secret passage ways that lead to darkness, but no Dirt Guy. I get confused and check all the rooms with closed doors because I distinctly remember keeping them open after checking them. I find out the problem a while later after I must've circled the house a few times. Mugen's been closing them behind me! So I finally give it to him. Fine, Dirt Guy left and he just sort of "magically" knew that.
We head back to the front door and find Dirt Guy pathetically banging against the door. Apparently Mugen locked him out even knowing Dirt Guy wasn't home. These guys are gonna give me a headache.
Dirt Guy asks for food and checks out the kitchen, where he finds nothing. I take this opportunity to make my way back to the tavern where tiefling lady said she always works. We make our way there and the two sit down at a random table. I check the bar for her, but she's not there. The only people seem to be two passed out drunk guys in the corner.
I head towards the back area and call out for someone. A woman answers, clearly half asleep, and I ask her for a couple plates of food. Mugen yells for it to be four, so she gets up and starts making food. I ask her where the tiefling lady is and she informs me that she's out at her other job. Of course she is. I'm a little disappointed, wishing she meant that she was always working here, but that's fine. She'll come in eventually.
I tell the boys that food'll be out soon and return to the room I'd stayed in to fetch the note. I come back and ask the cook what it says. She seems pleasantly surprised that the tiefling left me a note and then uses a notebook to read it. I guess I'm not the only one that can't read in this realm. 😅 It says that I fell asleep and that the room is free of charge. Also that the breakfast was for me. I mean, I'd assumed that, but I'm glad it didn't say something like "I'll be right back, don't eat my breakfast".
The food comes out and I pour myself a glass of water from the pitcher on the table while Mugen and Dirt Guy eat. Apparently all the tables have pitchers of water. I don't remember them being there last night, and it tastes a little different what I drank before. Mugen helps himself to three of the plates once I let him know I already ate and once they're done, I pull out the wanted poster.
"So this is our next job. Any ideas on how to go about this?"
Neither of them answer. Dirt Guy doesn't surprise me, but even the monologuer is quiet. I show them the map too and ask them how we travel, if we need weapons, and just nothing. It's then I realize that I'm the leader of this group and I don't like it. I don't know shit about this realm. This is not what I signed up for.
At this point, I really want to talk to the tiefling because she's clearly the only one that knows anything around here. I head back to the cook and ask her how long it'll be until the tiefling returns. About a couple hours. Great. So I head back to the table and ask them if they'd like to go and do another job before we meet my friend, because it'll be a while. Dirt Guy decides to join me and over to the guard's place we go!
I ask him for another job that'll only be a couple hours and he brings up mucking the horse stalls. I have so many questions... But I take it. Did you know you could ride animals here? I'd never heard of that, but I was excited to meet the horses.
We go to the horse stalls run by a guy named Steve and he explains what we need to do. It smells pretty bad in there, but it's fine. It's decent work. The horses are amazing! They even let me pet them without running away or trying to attack me. I'd never been able to freely pet something before.
At one point, I get a huge whiff of the shit I'm dealing with and shake my head to get rid of the smell. But then I remember the coin purse. Out of curiosity, I pull it out and dump a bit of crap into it. It disappears like the shiny rocks did and reluctantly, I go to smell it.
I literally have a magical bag of disappearing! I drop a little more in there and sniff it again, smelling nothing, and offhandedly wonder what would happen if I pissed inside of it, but then Dirt Guy comes back with an empty wheel-barrel so I put it away and get back to work.
Dirt Guy and I are sufficiently mucked up when we're done, but the good news is the tiefling should be back by now. Dirt Guy heads into the tavern and I go back to the room to change my pants so I don't stink when I see her again. I get another idea with the coin purse and see if I can stuff the pants into it so my bag doesn't smell like shit. Like everything else, they go in, and disappear. I decide it's best to not stick my penis in there when I go to pee in it. I'd hate to lose it and I just might. Who knows how this magic works.
I make a mental note to not stick my fingers in there either.
I return to the tavern and spot a spotless Dirt Guy sitting at the table. I look him up and down and ask "how the fuck did you do that?" He looks at me confused and I wave it off. I didn't think they had similar magic to Thera, but maybe they do. Wish I'd have known before I stuffed the pants into the coin purse. Now I don't have a backup pair.
Mugen seems entertained by the drunk guys who've made their way halfway across the bar, but are still passed out drunk. I get up and smell one of the water jugs, but it smells different, like alcohol. I get yet another brilliant idea and grab the coin purse so I can see if it holds liquids. I'd hate to find out it doesn't with pee.
I pour it in and the whole jug's worth of tampered water just disappears inside. I shake the coin purse upside down again and smell the opening.
I literally have a magical, bottomless, disappearing coin purse. I grab yet another jug and dump that in there too. Suddenly, I hear a familiar voice screaming in the back. I quickly glance around and notice Dirt Guy isn't in sight, but he shortly storms out from the back followed by the tiefling. She does not look happy. However, she's the reason I'm here and she's currently chasing after a very determined Dirt Guy out the tavern. Confused, and slightly worried, I follow them out. And thru the village. And then past the edge of town, growing more and more hesitant the further we get. It doesn't seem like a good idea to travel out of a village, unprepared, from a village people generally don't travel out of.
I'll tell you more tomorrow, but don't worry, the story gets infinitely better.
Author note: Stag does not know that there's only one sun and one moon on this planet. It doesn't have multiple suns and it wasn't a typo, he just doesn't know any better.
