OHMYGOD. literally ran here after finishing that new eren fic you’ve put out !! ohmygod….
i know there’s only like one chapter and this may sound like crazy ass glaze but i love it already. like the concept and EVERYTHINGGG and ugh y/n is just soo i love her. love how wild she is its so perf!! i cannot wait to see how this plays out eeekk
can feel the angst incoming too…..
OMG HI!! im glad u enjoyed hehe <33 and keep the glaze going my ego needs to get bigger 😈😈
working on ch 2 rn instead of studying cause i fr love this fic. yn being a little weirdo and eren being so sick of her immediately 🙁🙁🙁 i love them.
angst.... would it really be a _starrrlost fic without terrible gut wrenching angst and a mind numbing slow burn?
I’m not really sure how to start an email to an ex-girlfriend but I hope “Hey” is acceptable. Maybe it’s too informal for email but you blocked me on everything else so here was my last option.
Also not really sure how to ask for forgiveness either but this is my attempt. And considering we broke up a week ago i’m guessing this is my last chance before you can find another guy
Please consider hearing me out. It was stupid of me to not make time for you and I especially understand that now that I don’t have you making out with me every other night and help me with well…everything. I miss you. I miss you being here, with me. I miss us. Trust me if you wanted me to quit the extra shifts at my mom’s, the smoking, hell if you wanted me to drop out I’d do it all in a heartbeat.
P.S: If there’s another guy already, please forward me his number and me and him can have a ‘talk’.
You started an argument with me about me “being too needy for you” right before valentine’s day—which I was alone for, Porco— and your big grand apology email consists of saying you miss making out with me?
Trust me, you won’t have to worry about quitting all those things because we won’t be getting back together.
Go to hell and don’t bother sending another email either. I won’t read it.
Leaving me chocolates, my hoodie, flowers like were still together at my door won’t fix us back together.
And the note attached saying “P.S: Technically this isn’t an email. I still miss you.” is probably as idiotic as something can get and isn’t aiding .
P.S: You didn’t even use P.S the right way. This is how you use it, in a formal letter or email, not attached to a poor attempt at getting your ex back. And you used P.S right the first time how did you fuck it up now ???
I know you said don’t email again but you emailed first this time so this felt like a get out of jail free card.
I really am sorry I ruined your valentine’s day. I didn’t really think it was all that big of a deal. Which sounds worse than I meant but we can both agree I’m an idiot.
And if giving you stuff won’t get us back together, what will? Because to me that sounds like another chance and I’d really appreciate one of those.
Also because I never followed up to ask previously you’re not seeing someone else, right?
If you are please tell him I did boxing in highschool and serially got into fights (and am willing to re-hash that ability if it means winning you back.)
I know we haven’t technically talked since you and Pock’s breakup but you liked my story the other day so I’m assuming this isn’t breaking any immediate boundaries.
I do seriously think you should give him another chance. He really is depressed without you. Clearly, because he’s an idiot, he didn’t realize that he can barely function without you when you were together. But now he does and is bitching to me about it every god damn day.
It is a little bit selfish of me to ask this because I want him to not complain and whine to me—about “I just wish she would give me another chance”, “Fuck, do you think she found another guy?” and “She’s too good for me. Fuck.”, trust me it gets annoying—but you understand just how relentless and pestering he can get.
Please, Y/n. I am begging you to at least try with him again. For my sake at least.
Look, I do not hate you, but trying to meddle with me and Porco doesn’t particularly come off as helpful as you think.
While it’s a sweet thing to do at heart, it doesn’t help me in the slightest to open my school email and see one brother begging, and another begging for him as if we’re middle schoolers.
If Porco is that desperate for a date, tell him to wait a month to at least let me think it over. I still have life, class, work, etc., and trying to get back with the asshole who called me “too needy” does not touch the top ten of my priorities.
P.S: Also tell him to stop having Pieck message me about our breakup as well.
What part of “let me think it over” is incomprehensible to you. I know Marcel told you what I said and I know the message of “leave me alone for a while” was clear. So why on God’s green earth do you continue toleave gifts outside my door?
Do you have any idea frustrating it is for you to ignore every single thing I ask of you?
If you want to have any hopes of us getting back together in the future, stop leaving gifts, stop emailing, stop getting your brother to email you, and stop getting Pieck to message me on Instagram because I know she’s not doing that on her own.
And so help me God, if Reiner asks me if I’m seeing anyone, then immediately pulls out his phone and texts you the answer after class again, I’m going to march to your apartment and shove a lit blunt down your throat.
P.S: This is not flirting. I know when we were together I got mad like this and you thought it was hot, but don’t take it that way. I’m genuinely upset and annoyed by you, Porco.
highkey jealous of the jean kirstein headcanons as an eren girly i mean dang we didnt get no refs or that much detail 😒😒
(just joking btw !! loved both…
but we deserved eren refs 2!!)
LMFAOO HELP. i def agree with u cause there def isnt as much detail. part 2 this week cause i also started a new eren fic on my spam wattpad acc (@STARPHERNELIA) 😈😈
warning: nsfw lol! spice is a lot... spicier than my eren one...
includes: general, personality, appearance, friends, as ur bf, spicy
inspired by my jean kirstein fic: k&cherry!! can be read exclusively on ao3 at the moment.
a/n: these are MY personal headcanons, if you don't agree with stuff that's fine lol, it's a headcanon for a reason. i don't normally write smut/spicy stuff so if it sounds awkward its cause im probably bad and just awkward abt it LOL. this is a lengthy (very long) post. wc: 5.6k
general/random!
⟢ half german (dad), half french (mom); jean is french for douchebag btw (slap aot ref LMAOO).
⟢ knows how to speak french; not a lot he's close to being fluent but he only speaks it with his mama. never speaks it in front of people usually, including his close friends because he's lowk embarrassed that his accent sounds weird asf. (it doesn't he sounds so so so sexy)
⟢ however if he's tried, pissed tf off, drunk, he will start talking in french / mix his sentences (canadian francophone core lowk)
⟢ his voice is deeper in french and there's A LOT more emotion and like just general yearn in his tone cause french is just such a romantic language (saying this as someone who is fluent in french LMAO)
⟢ once again we got ANOTHER mama's boy. loves his mom to death, even if he lowk used to be SUCH an asshole to her in front of people smh. calls her maman (french for mom), or mama (<3).
⟢ that one time he was an asshole to her in front of his friends after she called him jean-boy is one of his life's biggest regrets and to this day he apologizes for it and feels SO guilty abt it
⟢ nerd. nerd. nerd. man is a NERDDDDDD A LOSER NERD. he LOVES classic novels (oscar wilde, jane austen, emily bronte, fyodor dostoevsky).
⟢ at first he lowk only started reading classics like the picture of dorian grey to look cool and mysterious but he soon realized that classics were actually really good and he genuinely enjoyed them
⟢ cinema buff. loves classic films like LOT trilogy, the godfather, scarface, fight club, whiplash, etc. BUT he also secretly loves romcoms and tragic yearning romances like la la land, pride and prejudice, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, 10 things i hate about you. but also loves other movies that would be on a teenage girls fav movie list like beautiful boy, interstellar, little women, lady bird. also brokeback mountain stan. he cries every single time he watches that movie.
⟢ he would not like timothee chalamet. i said what i said. even though he really enjoys the guys acting.
⟢ lowk a performative male without really noticing it or trying. it's just like built in him to be a genuinely attractive guy to women. (just never the women he actually likes unfortunately) like HE IS the female gaze.
⟢ lowk a raging bisexual icon but he often confuses feelings of romance for those of stronger platonic friendships (case in point marco- but lowk jean was genuinely in love with marco but just didn't have the balls to say anything or admit it to himself but everyone lowk knew it...) (also found armin very very attractive even after learning he was a boy and not a girl LMAO. we love jearmin in this household)
⟢ LOVES music. over like 200k minutes on his spotify wrapped. his fav artists/bands would definitely be cigarettes after sex, the arctic monkeys, jeff buckley, radio head, the smiths, the cranberries, frank ocean but also tyler the creator, a$ap rocky, drake, kendrick, carti, kanye, central cee, and unironically he enjoys taylor swift (only her older songs and some songs from ttpd, hates the new taylor). again seems performative but it mostly isn't- he's just naturally like this. he likes everything.
⟢ with that said he had a shit ton of playlists and will make his friends playlists for their birthdays or just randomly and would probably burn them onto cds. but he might chicken out and not give them it cause he feels like it's lame.
⟢ has multiple pairs of headphones on him at all time. wired. airpods. over-ear. his fav is however wired, but he usually has an airpod in one ear at all time playing music.
⟢ unironically team jacob, team stefan, team second lead male love interest (cause he relates asf)
⟢ would be VERY into pop culture and celeb gossip but tries to be lowk abt it. he knows the ENTIRE phoebe bridgers paul mescal daisy edgar jones thing and is invested to the point where he follows a gossip page
⟢ he'd have a public ig account where he follows everyone from school and uni and stuff but he'd also have a close freinds/spam acc with like 12 followers where he just shit posts and posts vlogs and videos of his friends and pics of himself.
⟢ he would have a tiktok and he'd probably post fit checks and hockey stuff probably. stuff like this LMFAO and also this
⟢ would be very close friends with everyone but especially sasha and connie who are like his younger siblings, marco who is his rock, and eren who he will never admit to liking but he genuinely cares very very much for him. would also notably confide in armin when he needs a proper no bullshit answers and advice. him and ymir would get along well enough (drinking + smoking buddies), but ymir thinks he's a pretentious rich douchebag LMAOOO and also he probably has tried hitting on historia at some point so that doesn't help.
⟢ black coffee. no milk, no creamer, no sugar. straight black coffee. he likes hot black coffee in the winter or when it's cold he'll sometimes put a little butter in it cause his throat gets sore easily. in summer he loves iced americanos and connie and sasha make so much fun of him for it cause plain black coffee is so yuck
⟢ knows how to cook. helped his mama in the kitchen growing up (only child core) and will often cook for sasha to show he cares for her <3
⟢ athletic. i've seen a lot of people say he'd play football and i can sorta see it but lowk I feel like he'd be just so so so much better at ice hockey. i feel like he'd be known for being very graceful for a hockey player. he just gives off canadian (specifically french-canadian) hockey bro vibes but he's the least douchebaggiest on the team of exclusively douchebags
⟢ chews a lot of gum as well since he always needs to make sure his breath smells good
⟢ he would love cats. would specifically have a black cat with like green eyes
⟢ very very nice neat handwriting. knows how to write in cursive.
⟢ studious asf. very competitive about his grades. when he was younger he used to flaunt the fact that he was so smart because he studied hard, but as he got older he was more quiet about it.
⟢ he would probably study psych (abtr reference...) or business (i feel like his dad would be a business owner/own a law firm perchance). however, he doesn't really even enjoy what he's studying. he tried to convince himself that he did but it was lowk just because the degree would provide him a secure future... he craves stability... but...
⟢ his true passion it art. he loves to paint, draw, sketch all of it but he never pursued it because 1) his dad discouraged him and told him it wasn't a safe career and he'd never make it in the industry 2) he genuinely thinks he's not any good- not trying to humble brag or fishing for compliments or reassurance; he GENUINELY does not think he's good. he's very secretive about his art, not a lot of people know he even does it and he gets very defensive about it and will even get mad if you try and bring it up in front of others, especially his parents.
⟢ also with that said, he doesn't have the best relationship with his dad. i feel like his dad was always just busy with work and was never around much (which is why jean is so close to his mom) but his dad also expected a lot from him and jean genuinely looked up to his dad growing up and wanted to always impress him so he'd study really hard and try to get the best grades and he was always pushy with people cause he wanted to act better than everyone else but it was lowk just because he wanted his dads attention...
⟢ more on his family; he's not like super rich considering he lives in trost, but his family is def comfortable compared to a lot of his friends families.
⟢ a pretty big car guy. him and eren probably worked at a mechanic shop in highschool/uni (jean more for fun since he didn't really need a job). him and eren would talk about cars a lot. ymir and him too probably since i imagine ymir as a mechanic hehe
⟢ want's a big family. because he was an only child + he grew up around sasha and connie's families that were big and they had a lot of siblings and he was always lowk jealous cause sasha and connie weren't his real siblings and they had actual siblings </3
⟢ would be the best dad ever. so supporting and loving and spoils them rotten. would be a fantastic girl dad specifically. he wants a daughter more than anything in the world.
⟢ took piano and horseback riding lessons as a kid.
⟢ FATASSSSSSS. eats so so much. especially omelets. he loves omelets. but his nicotine addiction in the recent years has killed his hunger </3
⟢ loves loves loves ice cream. his fav dessert. a nice big scoop of expensive ass vanilla bean ice cream after a long day MMHMMM.
⟢ cigarettes > vapes. he hates people who vape and thinks they are posers asf and pussy cause just smoke the damn cigarettes vapes are terrible for u.... (cigs are also just as bad but hey)
⟢ thankfully u can like 90% of the time not smell the cigarette smoke on him. he's very clean and careful abt it.
⟢ drinks. he likes beer but he prefers whiskey or bourbon.
⟢ likes flowers a lot.
appearance.
⟢ this specifically his how i feel like he'd look. also this. and this.
⟢ i specifically always imagine him to look like a mix of jeff buckley and a little bit of chase crawford (specifically him in gossip girl as nate archibald LOL)
⟢ TALL. SO SO SO TALL. (taller than eren ofc and ALWAYS makes sure to point it out.)
⟢ not pale but also not as tan as eren. he's very sunkissed??
⟢ would have lots of moles/birthmarks on his body
⟢ body is muscular but on the leaner side. in between how lean eren is and how buff reiner is because he plays hockey.
⟢ lanky asf. legs for days and long arms
⟢ big veiny hands, but they are more like delicate looking (??) and his fingers are slender. he has pretty hands. i like hands.
⟢ you would think that he has callouses but his hands are SO fucking soft and they smell really nice
⟢ fun fact: french men tend to be pretty hairless.. jean doesn't get a lot of hair on his arms/legs/chest, however he has a happy trail 🤤
⟢ with that in mind, he also lowk struggles to grow out his facial hair like eren but he actually keeps it and doesn't just shave it off- he's probably on menoxidil and has an extensive beard care routine for that fuckahhh goatee. (connie and sasha have both pointed out how it looks like pubes on multiple occasions)
⟢ smells REALLY good. citrus, vanilla, warm musk, sandalwood- he would just smell so so so amazing. i wanna lick him.
⟢ takes A LOT of pride in the way he looks. if he sees a mirror he is unfortunately the type of guy who will stop and stare at himself and will fix his hair
⟢ long thick eyelashes that are naturally curled that im totally jealous of
⟢ showers twice a day. this bitch is CLEANNNN
⟢ his hair would be that ashy blonde color a lot of french people have but in the sun it sometimes comes off as a strawberry blonde <3
⟢ mullet. yes. ofc. over grown in the back, occasionally gets it cleaned up. reference image for when it's grown out 🤤 vs fresh cut
⟢ the prettiest honey brown eyes. like this super nice light golden color and if ur up close there's flecks of green so they are technically hazel
⟢ BIG ASS NOSE. LONG. POINTY. HAS THAT BEAUTIFUL FUCKING BUMP ON THE RIDGE... MMMMMMMMMMM (exactly like this.) so so so so so so sexy
⟢ is just so so so pretty and perfect looking and attractive oh my lordddddddd
⟢ dresses very very nicely. a lot more put together than connie and eren who tend to dress for street ware. lots of button up casual dress shirts (sleeves rolled up to the elbows so u can see his veins YAS GOD!!!!), crewnecks, quarter zips. when he does wear tee's they are more fitted. will wear grey sweats and zip ups during exam season. lots of neutral colors, greys, browns, but he wears darker shades of green, reds (maroon would prob be his fav color icl), navy. no yellow. never any yellow. he dislikes yellow clothing.
⟢ i don't think he'd get any tattoos tbh. if he ever did get one it would be very very very meticulously planned out. he likes the idea of tattoos and how they look, he just isn't sure abt them on himself.
⟢ not a huge jewelry person. has a couple of rings and chains. i see him as a gold person tbh... would have a gold chain. maybe a dog-tag?
⟢ not really appearance but lowk his aura is just so sexy. like he just screams sexy. like just looking at him or being near him MMMMM turns literally every girl ever on (me. im every girl)
⟢ sasha and historia have painted his nails in the past and he's open to doing it again. yes. bisexual confident in himself icon rmr?
⟢ doesn't really blush but when it's cold his nose gets red. when he's embarrassed his ears are bright red.
personality
⟢ can come of as THE BIGGEST ASSHOLE EVER. idgaf what anyone says this man is just so sassy and stupid he just seems straight up mean at times...
⟢ specifically he is a loud, judgemental, sharp-tongued asshole who says what everyone else is thinking- often without thinking twice about it himself. he doesn't care if what he says will hurt someones feelings in the moment- especially if he doesn't know this person, dislikes the person, or specifically if he finds the person attractive he will be an even bigger jerk cause he's so stupid and doesn't know how to express himself LMFAO
⟢ he's very very very blunt. rarely ever sugar coats things and gets straight to the point.
⟢ a flirt. so so so flirty. flirts with everyone. and he's SO damn good at it. he's naturally very charming to the point where it's annoying. often the flirting is a defense mechanism, an ego boost, and sometimes he just genuinely enjoys the banter. not a sleazy flirt for sure.
⟢ very pessimistic. he's a realist for sure. likely his worst trait. always thinks of the worse case scenario and assumes that things won't go the way he wants them too. it's not that he's hopeless- he's just practical.
⟢ teases people a lot hehe. he just loves to poke and provoke people (him and ymir often gang up on eren, connie, and reiner) for literally no fucking reason other than to get reactions LMFAOO
⟢ similar to eren, he's VERY hot headed. gets angry very quick HOWEVER unlike eren he's verbal first. he explodes emotionally, raises his voice, snaps, but he's not usually the type to get physically violent unless something REALLLLLLLY pisses him off.
⟢ i feel like he doesn't like arguing. he's actually not a very confrontational person, he's just hotheaded. he literally gets into arguments by accident. he finds it difficult to talk about his feelings and put into words what he's thinking about- it's hard for him to articulate his feelings. he also often realizes what he meant to say later on when replaying and overanalyzing the argument LOL
⟢ swears. so fuckin much. "jesus fuck". "fuck you you dumb fucking fuck". "oh for fucks sake." however he's also very mindful and respectful and will almost never swear in front of his parents or people older than him
⟢ swears in french when he's super pissed off.
⟢ when he's comfortable/drunk he's very very loud and outspoken and always has something to say, but very often he gets quiet all of a sudden and zones out. i feel like he gets emotionally overwhelmed easily and just checks out. he's so emo.
⟢ playful asf. jokes to cope!!
⟢ gets easily embarrassed and will hardly show emotions cause he wants to be mysterious so fucking bad. he wants to act nonchalant asf and be like black cat energy naturally like eren, mikasa and levi, but he's just a big golden retriever. he radiates good boy/dog energy so bad
⟢ a diva with an attitude problem.
⟢ overthinks everything for NO REASON BRO. he's always thinking and thinking and thinking- i lowk do think this man would be depressed for literally no reason because he just ruminates so much. canonically jean has a lot of guilt, survivors remorse, pressure, self-doubt, and fears of inadequacy and i feel like all these things can translate into a modern au even if marco (the fire that started jean's character growth) isn't dead, i feel like he'd still be like this...
⟢ very prideful and likes to flex how good he is at things. will loudly boast how good he is at things. can come off as pretentious and self absorbed because of it and lowk... he sorta is... so fucking self obsessed but if i was jean kirstein i totally would be too. HOWEVER that was how he was younger to like 11th maybe 12th grade. in university he's definitely toned it down a lot more and has learned when it's appropriate to do it and has limits. but when he's with like eren or reiner? you best believe he's prideful and so full oh himself.
⟢ easily flustered. this man tries so hard not to get flustered but fails miserably.
⟢ so incredibly caring and thoughtful. he notices a lot of things and has mental lists of the things the people he cares about likes/dislikes. in fact, i feel like he'd have a folder in his notes app for it.
⟢ a natural leader. he would be captain of his hockey team. despite the fact that he's so pessimistic- somehow, it just works. probably because he actually cares deeply for every guy on the team and knows them inside and out and is somehow able to put his pride aside and say meaningful things. (that scene in the rumbling arc where he tells reiner that their scouts </3)
⟢ yearner. yearner. yearner. he yearns like no other. like hello he was into mikasa FOR YEARS despite her never once showing ANY interest in him even after eren was out of the picture. and marco? jean YEARNS for him. everything jean does is in the memory of his dearest friend and soulmate.
⟢ however jean fixates and idealizes. he sees the very best in people to a fault unfortunately.
⟢ i seriously don't think jean would be an f-boy. yes he flirts a lot but it doesn't mean he sleeps around. when it comes to actual real emotional and physical intimacy, he's cautious as fuck. he's not the type to sleep around with random people to pass time or treat sex like it's meaningless. oh, and he's terrible at casual relationships. casual sex, friends with benefits, situationships? the bane of his existence he HATES it.
as your boyfriend <3
⟢ falls in love slowly but its irreversible. he doesn't even realize it's happening at first. he starts to notice small things abt you without even trying, wants to spend more time with you, wants to reach out and touch ur hands, your arms, your waist and he just can't understand why. he'll blame it on the fact that he's just physically attracted to you, but obviously it's SO much more than that. and by the time he eventually clocks it, he's already fucked. when jean loves someone- it's permanent. you will always own his heart even if you break it a million times over and over again.
⟢ LOVES drawing you. has sketchbooks FILLED with drawings of you.
⟢ makes playlists for you. multiple playlists. a new one for every date. for your birthdays. when you have an important test coming up. anything and everything he just loves showing you he cares in this way.
⟢ doesn't seem outwardly clingy but he's always around you. like he's ALWAYS right there. sitting beside you. standing just a little too close. leaning in when you talk. his eyes follow you wherever you go.
⟢ however pda is his kink of all kinks. he adores pda but like very subtle pda. not enough to make people uncomfortable and ick them out and shout at you guys to get a room, but just enough to let everyone in the room know your his. he'll pull you by the waist onto his lap when the gang is sitting together, and wraps his arms around you and buries his head into your shoulder. kisses you so much- not full on makeouts (though he loves to do that in front of everyone too), but forehead kisses, kissing the top of your head, kissing your hands. all of it. he adores when you kiss him first too.
⟢ touch starved. like he literally is like a starving man. hands are constantly on you tbh. if you guys are sitting at side by side at dinner, his hand is on your knee. if you guys are just sitting he grabs your hand and rubs his thumb over your wrists pulse point. when you initiate touch he melts instantly.
⟢ yearnerrrrrr yearn yearn yearn. he'll flirt, joke, try and act nonchalant but trust at night he's replaying ur conversations in his head over and over and over again, overthinking everything he said, remembering all the microscopic little things that you did and wondering why you did those things.
⟢ overthinks the fuck outta your relationship. (before getting together and when you're together as well) jean will convince himself you don't feel the same. and then he yearns even harder. it literally causes him physical pain because he wants you so fucking bad.
⟢ "NOW I WANT SOMEONE BADLY!!" this song is his fucking anthem when he's in love with you so bad.
⟢ a major big fat slut for eye contact. eye contact turns him on so bad oh my god. if you're talking to him and holding eye contact the entire time or if he's telling you something and you guys are holding eye contact trust me that man is rock hard.
⟢ gets flustered in a VERY humiliating way that bruises his ego, especially if you tease him like "hmm jean, don't tell me you like me or something?" his ears go bright red. jaw tightens. he's suddenly very aware of his body and the way he looks and his hands especially- he'll cross his arms over his chest, make fists, shove his hands into his pockets. and he avoids eye contact but keeps glancing back at you while getting increasingly more flustered all the while trying to play it cool (fails miserably) and says things like "fuck off"
⟢ MR DARCY HAND FLEX. MR DARCY HAND FLEX. MR DARCY HAND FLEXXXXXX
⟢ so affectionate in private. so so so touchy it can almost be overstimulating. always grabbing onto your waist, hips, ass. wraps his arms around you, pulls you onto his lap, makes your lay down on top of him, loves putting his head on your chest or lap. he NEEDS to be close to you.
⟢ loves when you touch him absentmindedly. your hand touching his arm while you talk. tracing shapes on his chest. running your hands through his hair. it makes him relax and feel so at ease. sometimes he'll close his eyes without realizing and you lowk freak out and think you put him to sleep with how boring the conversation was.
⟢ loves the sound of your voice and your laugh. loves when you imitate the way he talks like you try to make your voice deeper and shit. LOVESSSS how you talk to pets, specifically his cat who he refers to as your daughter the minute your guys are official.
⟢ with that in mind he literally talks to his cat in a baby voice and would say shit like "ur mama's comin' over tonight so you gotta be good, alright?" hes such a fucking dork omg
⟢ will kiss you a couple of times and then take you out on a date and then when he's absolutely certain your feel even a fraction of what he feels for you, he begs you to let him be YOUR boyfriend. more than you being his, he NEEDS to be yours. your one and only. so he would specifically ask "please let me be your boyfriend" not "please be my girlfriend." PATHETICCCCC
⟢ calls you by your name cause he loves your name so much. but he does also love calling you baby, lover, my love, pretty girl, MY pretty girl, beautiful, my lover, angel, all sorts of names. he also loves calling you pet-names in french!! mon cheri (my dear), ma bell (my beautiful one), ma biche/ma bichette (my doe, ob reference perchance?) and also mon petit chou = my little cabbage. that one probably weirded you out at first but it's actually really cute.
⟢ everyone knows how he feels about you. it's painfully obvious. he's ALWAYS staring right at you. when he talks to you his voice get's softer. he's always checking in on you, asking if you're okay- something he never really does with anyone else.
⟢ he's also always smiling around you but not that cocky smirk he has with everyone else, not it's like a pathetic down bad boyish grin.
⟢ remembers EVERYTHING about you somehow. things you don't even remember about yourself.
⟢ JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS SOOOOOO JEALOUS. and hes SO fucking petty about it to holy fucking shit. imagine you guys are at a party and some guy is hitting on you, you don't really realize it- or maybe u do- well the minute jean sees it he will infact walk over and wordlessly pull you into his arms by grabbing your waist/hips or he straight up grabs your face and kiss you while looking RIGHT at the guy. and he'd smile afterwards and be like oh hey, who exactly are you? bonus points if he knows the guy and pretends like he doesn't remember him LMFAO.
⟢ very possessive as well. you're his. you BELONG to him and he belongs to you. no one else.
⟢ protective as fuck normally ofc but especially when it comes to you. if something happened like you getting into an argument with someone. he will push and push and push until you finally tell him what happened and he won't give up no matter how much you tell him to fuck off. it's so annoying but ugh he just loves you so much he wants to fix everything and take care of you so bad.
(case in point, aot chapter 116)
⟢ the reason why you even avoid telling him what happened 90% of the time is cause you alr know he's somehow gonna get involved in the mess and make it even worse cause hes so fuckin stupid omg
⟢ hates arguing so so much. but with you, he actually tries. he doesn’t shut down or dodge the issue the way he usually does with his friends. when you’re fighting, he wants to get to the root of it instead of pretending everything’s fine, because he cares about you more than anyone else. he actually tries to explain how he feels, even when he doesn’t have the right words and he gets really frustrated because of it. In the heat of the moment, he might snap—say something harsh without thinking—but the regret is instant. He backtracks immediately, voice breaking, apologizing over and over, practically begging for your forgiveness because the idea of hurting you or losing you terrifies him.
⟢ with that said—if you’re genuinely pissed at him, he's a complete pathetic mess. all that pride and ego is GONE. he’ll literally drop to his knees in front of you, hands settling at your hips, forehead resting against your stomach and then he'll looks up at you with tears glassing those stupidly pretty honey-brown eyes—begging. It’s embarrassing. It’s pathetic. he doesn't care though. all he cares about is how bad he needs your forgiveness. he can’t sleep, can’t eat, can’t even breathe right knowing you’re angry with him. Every second stretches until it hurts. (Think Art Donaldson in Challengers—that bedroom scene.)
⟢ has so so so much respect for you. only ever has amazing things to say about you. he quite literally worships you. he sees you as the only source of light in his pathetic, miserable life and you are perfect, you can do no wrong literally 99% of the time
⟢ he would never break up with you first tbh and if you did break up he would be in denial until you finally tell him to leave you the fuck alone and then he would try SOOOO hard to hate you but he literally is incapable of it and it makes him so angry so then he lowk just starts hating himself LMFAOO
⟢ wants a life with you the moment he realizes he's in love. and yes, even though he wants kids and a big happy family and all that shit, if you don't want kids that's fine too. he'll do whatever you want as long as you stay by his side.
⟢ domestic intimacy is lowk his fav!!!! he LOVES cooking with you, grocery shopping, studying side by side, sitting in comfortable silence.
⟢ he loves when you wear his clothes around the house or outside.
⟢ when he first realized he liked you he'd literally get hard just thinking about you. your voice. your laugh. your scent. your smile. your eyes. YOU. you are his biggest turn on ever. nothing has ever gotten him as hard as you do.
⟢ at night trust he just repeatedly gets hard replaying your interactions with him that day he's so pathetic holy shit
⟢ but just cause he's pathetic DOES NOT mean he's pathetic in bed. that man is big. i'm talking stallion sized easily 7, 8 maybe even 9 inches big when he's rock solid. like ik that's unrealistic but this is jean kirstein were talking about.
⟢ so big that the first time you felt it you got all nervous and he said something like "i know you can take it my pretty girl."
⟢ rough. possesive asf. hands on your neck, boarderline choking you out (consensually ofc), leaving marks everywhere, using you until your literally shaking, unable to even speak. he has the most stamina out of like any of the aot men and i will die on this hill.
⟢ praise praise praise. he loves to praise you so so so much. literally worships you, whispering sweet nothing constantly.
⟢ his lips would be on yours like every 5 seconds. he loves loves loves kissing you.
⟢ he wants to be able to see your face. hes a missionary and cowgirl fanatic.
⟢ he's so so so needy. literally always in the mood. there has never been a time where you wanna do something and he's NOT in the mood.
⟢ he loves getting you on your knees, burying his hands in your hair and face fucking you until your a mess, your eyes a red and so so so watery, your gagging- he lovessss hearing you gag on him. he has one hand cupped on your face, brushing away tears tellin you you're doing such a good job for him and that you're makin him feel so so so good. AHHH
⟢ when it's his turn to make you feel good, he will literally hold you down and keep going while you beg him to stop saying it's too much. his hands are big like i mentioned and he has long pretty fingers that always hit the right spot perfectly and he is a tongue god holy fucking shit.
⟢ he will tease tf outta you. constantly ruining your orgasm, not letting you cum, leaving you a completely mess to the point where you can't even beg anymore and then he'll smile and be like "what do you want me to do baby?" he loves having that bit of control over you.
⟢ will rip your clothes off and have you stand while he sits at the bed and just stares and stares and stares OR the other way around, you on the bed squirming BEGGING for him to touch you and him just watching you in utter awe
⟢ kissing your thighs and arms and stomach and just any parts of you you may be insecure about and whispering sweet nothing about how fuckin perfect you are.
⟢ loves to fuck you in unconventional places. the bedroom is fine but the thrill of fucking you in a tight dark space, in the car, in the kitchen, the bathroom, THE SHOWERRRRRR. if ur in the shower he begs PLEASE LET ME INNNNN
⟢ your legs resting on his shoulders.
⟢ big nose..... hehe..... sitting on his face- WOAHHHHHH WHO SAID THAT
okay enough im going crazy i love jean kirstein so fuckign much. i think i know/imagine things about him more than people ik irl...
༝༚༝༚ "i like when you're mad at me" ! ⋆˚࿔ gojo satoru
in which satoru gojo confesses his very real crush on his chronically angry best friend at a house party, accidentally ruins her peaceful reputation, and then casually admits he meant every word—because, unfortunately for her, nothing turns him on more than the way she looks when she’s glaring up at him like she wants to kill him.
pairing: (sorta)nerd! gojo x angry bsf ! reader
content warning: MDNI !! nsfw, profanity, oral sex, gojo being an edge lord
a/n: i haven't written smut in a HOT minute (like 4 or 5 years) so please bare with me i'm trying to practice for an upcoming chapter in my eren fic... also if u know me personally PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE dont read this ill literally die. thx. also also i listend to rush by troye sivan abot 61 times while writing this so maybe listen to it while reading. art by nek0zuu_ on x <3
your fist bangs rather aggressively against the wooden door of satoru gojo's dorm room, the thuds echoing down the hallway.
you were in a particularly sticky situation thanks to him being an immensely irritating idiot who wasn't answering any of your frantic calls or texts, leaving you no choice but to storm across campus to his dorm and confront him in person because this whole situation was honestly starting to get ridiculous.
you see, last night, you had become the unwilling victim to one of gojo's cruel jokes at a small house part—where he'd suddenly decided to loudly announce his interest in you.
in fact, word for word he'd slurred out in his drunken state "i think y/n is a real cutie. i have a pretty big crush on her."
what normal 19 year old admits to having a crush?
this normally wouldn't have been such an issue if it was any other guy, but because it was gojo—the campus heartthrob who most likely had his own protective fan club—it was in fact, the biggest issue to ever exist.
up until last night, you and gojo had been nothing but friends. you'd spent the past couple years in high school and now in university thinking that the bond between you was similar to the bond you had with any other guy in your life. but you very quickly realized that you had either missed some very obvious signs or he was actually just fucking with you.
"open the fucking door satoru!" you shout, banging your fist harder against the wood. there's no response. someone sticks their head out of their dorm to see what the commotion is about, but once they realize it's you, they quickly disappear back into their room.
where the hell is this guy?
without thinking, your hand wraps around the doorknob and you turn it. to your surprise, it's unlocked.
you push it open and are immediately met with a shirtless gojo staoru, muscles glistening with sweat, groaning softly.
what the fuck?
you stare wide eyed as you watch him do at least ten more pushups, black over-ear headphones sitting on his head as his muscular arms continue to pump his body up and down, before he finally realizes he's being watched.
in reality, satoru had known you'd been standing there. he'd known you'd been banging on his door. he'd known you'd been calling and texting.
he'd left his door unlocked for a reason.
with a shit eating grin that makes your blood boil, satoru pushes himself off the floor, pulling his headphones of his head to let them rest around his neck.
swallowing hard, your eyes trail down the length of him, taking in every detail. from the snow-white hair to the incredible blue of his irises, his long straight nose and rosy pink lips—his tongue darting out to lick the bottom. his adam's apple bobs as his own eyes trail down your body. the steady rise and fall of his chest, the defined ridge of his abs, all the way down to the gray sweatpants that hang low enough on his hips for you to see the prominent V-line leading down to the obvious, growing bulge in his pants.
god i really hate how fucking hot he is.
"hey, what a surprise! what are you doin' here pretty—"
"shut up." you glare at him genuine rage flowing through you right now. it's blinding—the anger and sheer hatred you feel towards this man for ruining your perfect, peaceful university life.
satoru raises a brow as he steps over to his desk, grabbing the silver framed glasses he normally wears and putting them on. "oh come on, don't tell me you're still mad about last night—"
"of course i'm still mad you idiot." you seethe, shutting the door behind you with more force than necessary to prevent anyone from over hearing—which they most likely would end up doing anyways given the paper thin walls. "i thought you were supposed to be some fuckin' genius, but i guess were both idiots cause what the actual fuck were you thinking?"
"i was thinking that you have a beautiful fucking brain and a really nice ass—"
"i'm literally going to report you for sexual harassment."
satoru holds both hands up in mock surrender, biting down on the soft flesh of his inner cheek to keep himself from smiling. would it be bad to admit that he's really turned on right now? like more turned on than he's every been?
your eyes unintentionally (okay, maybe a little intentionally) drift back down to his abs. you'd always known he was well built, constantly hitting the gym and eating well—but you hadn't realized it was this bad.
"you know my eyes are up here—"
"didn't i tell you to shut up?" you snap your gaze back up toward him, hands curling into fists at your sides. "just put on a shirt or something—"
"what? does my nakedness bother you or somethin'—"
"no. it doesn't. i just want you to put a fucking shirt on—"
without warning, satoru takes two steps towards you stopping right in front of you. you scramble backwards desperate to create as much distance between the two of you as humanly possible, but your back is met with the had surface of the door.
great.
satoru only grins at the fact that you are very obviously nervous, crossing his arms over his chest causing his biceps to bludge.
oh fuck me—
no wait. no. don't fuck me. i don't want that. not at all. not even a little—
"alright. so you gonna tell me why you banged on my door for so long and blew up my phone?"
"you know why i did all of that—wait what the fuck?" your jaw falls slack as you process what he'd just said. "you're telling me you heard me banging at your door and you knew i was blowing your phone up—did you ignore me on purpose—"
"well, duh," he sticks his tongue out, amused by the whole situation. "i just thought it would be fun to see how far you'd go."
"i'm not some fucking science experiment toru."
satoru has to physically stop himself from cumming right then and there. fuckkkk he loves when you call him toru.
"never said you were,"
"than stop treating me like i am one." you sigh deeply, rubbing your hands over your face. you're exhausted. you've never done well under stressful situations (which was terrible considering that satoru as your best friend always found ways to get you into stress inducing situations) and this latest situation he's put you in has caused you enough stress to take at least fifteen years off your life.
it was unfortunate how bad you cared about how others saw you. before rumors of what had gone down last circulated amongst the girls on campus, you'd been well known as satoru's friend who was more like a sister if anything in their eyes since he clearly had no interest in you and pretty much everyone on campus who you'd run into you never seemed to have any problems with you.
that of course, was different now. you couldn't walk in the halls or sit in class or even go to the bathroom without running into some girl who had previously had her eyes on satoru like he was some prize to claim and was very obviously jealous of you—likely internally cursing you for taking away their already slim chance to claim him.
it was all just so fucking ridiculous.
you didn't even want him—they could have him for all you cared.
all you wanted was your quiet, peaceful life back.
"i need you to tell people that it was a joke."
satoru frowns. "and why exactly would i do that?"
"because it was a joke?" you state as if its obvious and wait for satoru to laugh and admit that it had been but his frown remains intact. "wait—it was a joke right? you don't have a crush on me, do you?"
there's no way—
"would it really be so bad if i did?"
there's literally no fucking way.
your brain short circuits as you gawk at your best friend.
sure, maybe you had thought about it. what it would be like for the two of you to be more. what it would be like to hold his hand or kiss his cheek or be held by him at night. and maybe you'd even imagined what it would be like to have him bend you over and fill you up until you were a shaking mess completely fucked out—but that wasn't realistic.
you and satoru gojo were just friends. you've always been just friends. you will always be just friend.
right?
"you can't like me satoru." you finally manage, shaking your head.
"why not." he takes a step closer, hands falling to his sides.
"because it wouldn't work—we'd be horrible together. i get too angry and i'd probably always be mad at you about something and you would hate it because you hate being treated like a little kid and you'd stress me out too bad and I would die prematurely—i'm pretty sure i already found a white hair the other day and last time i checked i'm only—"
"y/n," satoru's standing directly in front of you now, so close you can feel the heat radiate off his skin in consistent waves. so close you can smell him—the expensive cologne he always wears that drives you insane. so close you can feel his warm, minty breath on your cheek.
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck—
"i really do like you." his voice is so soft it makes something in you melt.
your entire face heats up. "you don't mean that—"
"i mean it. i really do." his large hands come up to cup your face, forcing you to look up at him as his thumbs. "besides, i like when you get mad."
satoru leans in closer, so close his lips brush against yours. your back arches slightly off the door, pressing your front flesh against him. you can feel the now rock solid bludge in his pants press against your stomach.
shit he's even bigger than i imagined.
"it really turns me on."
you gulp. "I can see that."
your entire core is molten, an entirely unfamiliar ache pulsing through you as his lips continue to hover just millimeters above yours. there's absolutely zero doubt that your panties are completely soaked through at this point.
"are you still mad at me?" satoru murmurs, the tip of his nose brushing against yours.
"yes—"
"good."
satoru crashes his lips against yours, rough and hungry as he devours you like a starved man. because in reality, satoru was starved. he'd been craving the taste of you for what felt like his entire life without having ever actually tried it.
and sure enough, you're just as sweet as he'd imagined.
a low guttural groan rips out from his throat as your hands find their way into his soft hair, pulling hard at the roots in an attempt to draw him closer if that was even possible.
his hands trail down to your neck to your waist, one resting there while the other one trails dangerously lower, finding the plush fat of your ass and giving it a squeeze.
you really do have the nicest ass.
in a dizzying messy string of motion, satoru's got you onto his bed your back against his mattress, legs dangling off the edge, his lips not having left yours the entire time as he pushes his tongue into your mouth.
there's not nearly enough air in the world for you to breath as you let out a series of moans against him, letting his tongue explores yours. you never could have imagined something as simple as french kissing could feel so insanely good.
you feel satoru's hand slip under your shirt and trail up your torso to your chest. to your surprise, he breaks the kiss for a moment, staring at you with heavy lidded eyes, hand hovering above your chest.
"you wanna stop?" he asks, breathing heavily.
you shake your head immediately, ignoring whatever better judgment and logic is telling you that this is most definitely a very, very bad idea.
"use your words," satoru mutters, glasses falling low on his nose bridge, white hair completely disheveled. "tell me what you want."
"i—" words fail you as you stare into his eyes, completely breathless.
"come on. you gotta tell me." he encourages and you feel one of his fingers graze over your nipple.
the brief contact is enough to send a shiver down your spine, you're more overstimulated than you realized. another senseless moan escapes you as you arch your back desperate for more contact.
"stop cheating—tell me what you want." satoru asks again, more firmly.
he's holding back on purpose, forcing you to voice your desires because it's something you've never been good at—trying to get on your nerves so you get angry at him again caught there's something extra attractive about you when you look like you want to kill him, and you're starting to look like you are.
"i want you to touch me." you manage, feeling your entire body heat up in embarrassment at the request.
never did you ever imagine you'd be laying on satoru's bed begging for him to touch you.
"atta' girl," he flashes that stupid boyish grin that always makes your heart race. "where do you want me to touch you?"
your patience is beginning to ware thin. he's walking on thin ice. "everywhere."
"i think you can be a little more specific—"
"don't push it." you grumble, pulling satoru's mouth to yours as you feel his cold fingers pinch your nipple causing you to gasp against him.
mouth still on yours satoru pulls your shirt up, only breaking away from you to get it off completely. his hands fumble with the clasp of your bra, causing you to giggle slightly before he finally gets it unclasped.
his lips trail down your neck leaving a trail of kisses and bites on your skin that have you breathing unusually heavy. satoru wastes no time at all, mouth clamping down on one of your breasts, his hand taking care of the other.
"toru—"
he moans against you at the sound of that nickname, his lips trailing further down until he reaches the waistband of your pants and glances up briefly to make sure you're alright before pulling those down, leaving you in nothing but your soaking panties.
with one hand gripping either leg, staoru spreads your thighs apart.
"wow, you're really wet, huh?" satoru mutters observantly, trailing a long finger down the soaked fabric. "and here i thought you actually hated me—"
"i do." you grit out wiggling your hips—squirming in desperation. god you need him to just touch you already. "i hate you so fucking much."
his blue eyes look up at you, and you watch as he lowers his head between your thighs, your legs now draped on his shoulders as he sticks out his tongue, slowly dragging it over your core—up your slit towards your clit—through the thin material of your panties.
you really do taste so fucking good. this was going to be a problem, satoru realizes very quickly. he doesn't think he'll be able to last an hour without tasting you anymore.
you squirm at the touch, needing more than this senseless teasing.
lucky you, satoru decides he's had enough fun and finally pulls your panties to the side revealing your glistening pussy that's throbbing with anticipation, and his tongue slowly flicks over your clit, hitting the sweet spot on the first try.
"Oh god—toruuu—" you whine, fingers tangle into his white hair.
you can feel him grin in satisfaction against you as he begins to suck softly on your most sensitive spot, tongue drawing slow circles over it causing your back to arch—pushing him harder against you.
the way he's eating you up is honestly surprising. you'd always thought satoru seemed to selfish to ever eat a girl out. but you'd been wrong about him liking you as a joke—so maybe you'd been wrong about that too.
his switches between using his tongue circling around your clit flicking it with perfect precision at a mind numbing speed and sucking on it—resulting in your legs wrapping around his neck putting his in a nasty headlock.
he fucking laughs at your eagerness. he was honestly surprised you'd folded so easily—he was expecting you to at least make him work for it a little harder, not that he's complaining or anything.
satoru trails his tongue down your folds before plunging past your entrance, curling just right to hit your sweet spot, one hand splayed onto your stomach to keep you still. you squirmed regardless, your moans getting louder as your eyes begin to water. you could care less if everyone person on the floor heard you screaming his name at this point.
your hips writhe resulting in his nose brushing your puffy clit as he continues to tongue fuck you with so much enthusiasm is was honestly sickening.
"i—fuck—" you inhale sharply, toes curling as you feel the muscles in your legs begin to tighten. the was your stomach is twisting and that warm feeling no man has ever managed to get you to feel is close to reaching it's pinnacle. "oh god—holy shit—i'm gonna—"
you barely have the word out when satoru suddenly pulls away, face flushed a pretty pink color, glasses fogged up. his mouth is wet—a mix of your arousal and his own spit coating his lips. you watch wide eyed as his tongue darts out to lick it.
all the built of tension in your stomach that was about to tip over into white hot pleasure instantly disappears and you feel heat prickle at your skin, familiar anger burning.
"you mother fucking asshole—"
satoru grins, standing up straight, easily towering over you. he runs a hand through his messy hair, watching carefully as you prop yourself up on your elbows, brows furrowed in frustration, hair disheveled, lips still swollen from how aggressively he'd been kissing you earlier.
the way his dick has been throbbing for the past couple of minutes has been driving him insane, and he decided he wanted to make you as angry as possible to see what you'd do if you had your pretty lips wrapped around his length.
the best way to get you angry? cut you off right before you cum.
he really was such a genius.
"come on," his eyes almost seem to darken as he looks down at you. "you really thought it would be that easy?"
the way you glare at him with so much hatred has his heart racing with excitement.
god, he really does love it when you're mad at him.
jean comforting reader and your daughter during a thunderstorm. domestic fluff. can u tell i dont like thunderstorms 💔😆 dividr credit: saradikagraphics
࣪ ˖ ⋆
Macy's teacher passed a mean comment to her once? You made sure to make a scene and get her fired. They called you dramatic, scary— but you don't make excuses when your baby comes home crying.
There was a cockroach on the kitchen floor? Oh, you stomped it to death before your husband came screaming at you for help.
You put a certain someone back in his place when he tugged at your pigtails too hard in sixth grade. (That certain someone happens to be your husband now, and he's probably scared of you more than anything)
You're not scared of anything, really.
So why were you in the kitchen trembling at the sound of the first lightning flash outside your home?
Outside, the wind howls louder, angrier— enough for the doors to swing by itself with a loud bang!
You try not to flinch. Focusing on stirring the curry infront of you instead of letting the fear crawl towards you.
And just like that the power goes out, your vision reduced to nothing but infinite darkness and you're left standing in the cold, empty kitchen all by yourself.
“Mommy?”
Your daughter stands somewhere near the entryway, probably rubbing her eyes, one arm out of her tshirt with her messy hair as she tries to reach out for you.
With the help of the faint glow that somehow makes its way from the windows, you make out her figure and kneel right infront of her.
“Yes, baby?” you smile. “You slept good?” you softly nudge her cheek. “Mhm” is all she says.
Outside, headlights of a car cruise through your neighborhood and it makes Macy's face visible for a breif while before the room is engulfed by the dark again.
“What was that sound?” her face twists a frown, the kind she gives you before you know she’s about to cry.
And as if the universe wanted to laugh at your predicament— there comes another earsplitting sound of thunder that resonates all throughout the house. Flickering all over for half a second, unsteady and haunting.
Macy's expression contorts before she throws herself into your arms and clutches you like you could keep her safe. But your hands, too are shaky and your heartbeat is revving faster than before.
Poor girl doesn't realise her mommy is just as scared as she is.
“No, no, no, no, May” you softly manage, stroking her h/c hair. “Mommy's right here, I'm here—o-okay?” But it's useless, she only cries as clutches at your chest hard.
You sigh and pick her up in your arms, ready to put her back to sleep again. But as you start to walk your head collides with something warm and solid.
“Ow!”
Your husband.
“You scared me Jean!” you whisper shout, glaring sharp as he grins down at you.
“What do we have here?” he ducks his head down at you and Macy, worry etched on his face.
“She's scared. She's trembling hard. Look.” you rock her in your arms, stroking her hair.
“Her mommy's trembling too.” He chuckles, patting your head as if you need comfort like Macy. “Poor thing.” He grins hard as if asking for a challenge, and he doesn’t know you're going to punish him with washing the dishes for the entire week for this one comment alone.
“Yet she came for me, not for you.” Your eye twitches. “We don't need you, move.” you walk past him, your shoulders brushing hard enough to make him shudder.
“Really?” Jean presses his palm over his heart. “You're going to say that? To me? The love of your life? The apple of your eyes?”
You don't say anything, just frown as you walk over to Macy's bedroom as Jean follows you close from behind.
As you sit on the edge of her bed another light flickers— signalling another oncoming wave of thunder.
“Quick, close the curtains!” your voice climbs higher as you squeeze your eyes shut and cover Macy's ears.
Jean closes the curtains before he sits right beside you, leaning into Macy's face and smiling warmly, your protective hold on her never faltering.
Macy reaches her one arm toward Jean’s face, whining as she grabs onto his jaw. Babbling some nonsense to him, fat tears rolling down on her cheeks as she keeps shaking.
“Yeah, come here, it's okay— there's nothing to be scared of.” Macy reaches her arms out to Jean before he cradles her into his arms, softly shushing her as her cries die in her throat. He leans back on the headboard, legs spreading wide as one remains folded under him.
“See? She needs me.” Jean grins at you as you keep glaring at him. Because really, she only ever calms down in his arms. And you will have to live with that fact.
“Daddy? What are those sounds?”
“Nothing, just a fraction of your mother's wrath.” he chuckles as he stares down at her.
“Stop playing around, keep her ears covered, Jean.” you warn, scooting closer, still trembling, voice shaky.
“Well, this one's stubborn.” Jean presses his index finger onto your forehead. “You're scared, I can see it.”
“I'm a grown woman, I'm not scared.”
“You're shaking,” he presses.
“I'm not.”
“I have eyes, you know.”
“I will literally kill—”
The wind howls strong enough to knock your house down and another thunder strikes, louder than any of the prior ones. And before you know it Jean’s strong arm wraps around your waist and pulls you closer and closer till your face is buried in the crook of his shoulder, your hands instinctively grabbing onto his collar as you squeeze your eyes shut. His one presses onto your ear as his another stays fixed onto Macy's just like you demanded him to.
Your breath grows raggedy as you let out a shaky noise. Refusing to detach yourself from the crook of his shoulder.
Jean rubs your back, silence filling the space between you— even Macy keeps her eyes wide open to spy on whatever scene was unfolding in front of her. Her wrathful mom melting like putty in her daddy's arms. Macy shifts between the both of you, giggling as her damped cheeks glisten in the dark.
“My fearless, warrior of a wife—” “Oh god, what is it now?” you chuckle, annoyance melting away. “Stop trying to act so tough.”
“I need to get over it.”
“Not when I'm around," Jean squeezes the both of you, planting a kiss on your forehead as he stares down at you with that easy, warm smile that always comes around you and only you. "I'll keep you both safe.”
And he will. You both are his entire world, after all.
i was wonderingg, is lightspeed headed towards a happy ending ?
- lootsss oflovee 𐔌՞ ܸ.ˬ.ܸ՞𐦯
hi hi !!
so at the moment, I have two possible ending written for light speed and one of them does have a happy ending BUT I'm still not sure which one I'm going to pick!! light speed is still a long way away from being done unfortunately but I'm trying my best to finish it up with in the next couple of months <3
cherry flavoured is too nostalgic like i feel this pit in my stomach everytime i read it--literally any of the versions that you have released in the past lol
the premise is so beautiful+unique, and your writing is wonderful, but omg it's so nostalgic it HURTS in the best way possible
haven't read lightspeed but i heard it also follows a cherry theme and tbh i think the cherry part rlly gets to me cuz of my perfume hahah
anyway i just wanted to tell u i love ur writing girl youre an angel and take care of urself <333
(also i don't find a lot of south asian girls who write jean fics hehe i feel so connected <33)
UGHH OMG THANK YOU SO SO MUCHHHH!!! I'm so glad cherry flavoured feels nostalgic ahhh I really wanted that to come across in my writing and im so happy it did!!
lowk just here to talk ab smth that haunts my mind… eren as an ice hockey player.
sometimes i wish lightspeed eren did ice hockey too or used to, wouldve been sexy af 😛😛

OMGGGG UGH YES. as a born Canadian I LOVE hockey!! i actually had a challengers style erenxreaderxjean one shot planned out where eren and jean were both hockey players... maybe I'll write it one day
just came from ao3 and can i just say how utterly amazing light speed is, like the songs, the details to eren and mc, all the diff characters are just chefs kiss omg! <33
i’m actually in love with the way you write, esp eren! the lotus detail was so pretty in the recent ch too like ugh my babies 💔
even though cherry flavoured is short so far, i can just tell i’m going to love it omg - i love jean. btw do you think you’ll update it? totally no pressure if not :))
hi hi omg!! sorry for the late reply I always forget I have tumble LMAO but omg thank you so much this means literally everything to me 😭 I'm so glad you enjoy light speed and cherry flavoured!! I'm actually in the process of writing ch 3 of cf rn and it will likely be up within the next couple of days <3
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