Steers, Queers, and Halacha

[bdsmproblems]

Rabbit, Rabbit

Deb Jannerson is a writer, whose articles have appeared in Bitch magazine and who was featured in Best Lesbian Erotica 2015, for the story “Andro Angel.” She is an awesome writer, an awesome person, and SHE HAS A BOOK OF POETRY BEING PUBLISHED THIS JANUARY. 

Calling on the awesome Tumblr community to support her work by 

A. Pre-Ordering her book, Rabbit, Rabbit, from Finishing Line Press at http://bit.ly/1VvbbL2

Pre-ordering for new authors is extremely important; it’s what informs the publishing company how well the book is going to do. It is often what determines whether or not the book is successful. 

B. Liking her Author page, which is extremely easy to find on the Facebook

C. Reblogging this post, so that other people on Tumblr get the opportunity to support an up and coming author.

D. Learning more about her and reading other things she’s written at http://www.deborahjannerson.com/writing.html

[steersqueersandhalacha]

I Live in New Orleans Now

It’s pretty easy to be gay and it’s pretty easy to be Jewish, but right now I’m trying to figure out exactly how to do both. I’m really excited to be going back to San Antonio for Rosh Hashanah, to see all of my dear friends around the dinner table and davening.

Shana Tova!

[westsemiteblues]

Photographs of the last remaining Jews of Yemen.

There were 55,000 Jews in Yemen in 1948. Today there are fewer than a hundred. The community existed for nearly three thousand years.

[veilingandmodestdressing]

Greek Romaniote Jews.

[steersqueersandhalacha]

I have a lot of love for the San Antonio Jewish Community right now. The people I work with at the JCC are super supportive, and I think every single one of my bosses, knowing that my life is in some dire upheaval right now, has tried to talk to me privately and made sure that I'm ok. The woman who is the youth director, Sammi, pulled me into the office to talk the other day and I have to say that having random people notice that things just don't seem right, even if it's part of their job, makes a world of difference. I also know that it's her job to convince me to go do Israel stuff, but at this point, I don't think Israel Teaching Fellows would be a bad move. Ultimately I want to keep learning, but I also want to build up my resume with actual teaching experience, so I went ahead and filled out an application. Thinking on it now, I guess the one thing that hasn't disappeared throughout these past few months is Judaism, and it's not even the God element that I'm really searching for as much as I find reassurance in the community that has already come forth and offered many different options for Purim and Pesach. 

Right now I feel like I've mentally saran wrapped a bunch of stuff that's happened over the past few months and it's still there in my brain but I'm fucking saving it for later. Right now I need to have all of my option on the table and most of those options are due somewhere between the 1st and 15th of March. I'm still debating over the Teach for America application, because I don't know if I want to pick a specific city and make it less likely, or if I want to throw the door open and ultimately reject someplace because there's no Jewish community and that's become a non-negotiable for me as of late. Fingers are crossed for the best. 

Tomorrow is my birthday and I can tell that things are saran wrapped up in there because there's not really a whole lot of room left to feel excited. 

[steersqueersandhalacha]

I read a book by Marya Hornbacher a while ago talking about finding a higher power. Even as a religious person this resonated with me because action is often so much easier than really really believing. One of the things she talked about was really trying to feel God in those most painful moments where everything seems hopeless. That painful feeling in your chest, that flicker of fire, lives on as a higher power even when everything else seems empty. 

Over the past few months I've lost all of the things I thought were so secure on December 1st. I've lost my car, I've lost my career choice, and most recently I've lost my relationship, and while there is no animosity, it doesn't take a genius to guess that I feel pretty broken and bruised right now. 

God is still here though. I just wish that God could be a little more looming sometimes beyond that little flicker in my chest of raw consciousness. 

And I know this post is on shabbat. One of the things that sucks the most is not having a super present Jewish community around me. Not that that's an excuse for posting on shabbat if I feel like I shouldn't, it's just that not having a Jewish community present when you've made that such an important part of your life is a really good way to feel lonely. 

[steersqueersandhalacha]

I've started listening to the Tanakh as an audiobook as I fall asleep at night. Go away anxiety, go far far away. (Please.)

[fotografando-memorias]

[steersqueersandhalacha]

The woman who constantly works at the only kosher meat restaurant in San Antonio asked me this evening why I wear a kippah. As I was explaining, it was brought up that I was a lesbian, and also observe shabbat and kashrut. She smiled and said “I like you, you’re breaking the rules.”

Then she invited me to the orthodox synagogue. The world is a strange place.

[steersqueersandhalacha]

Dear God;

Can we please rewind to three months ago and press pause? 

[steersqueersandhalacha]

In other news, I'm finally at the point where I can read and actually understand morning Brachos. (And of course add in a thank you for making me queer.) It may take until I'm 30 to catch up on the Jewish day school education I never had, but it's gonna happen. *face of determination*

[steersqueersandhalacha]

Trying to reconcile the idea that just because Jerusalem and Pardes have existing structures and activists who would most likely mesh with me ideologically, that doesn't mean that I'm up the river if I'm in San Antonio or Houston trying to actually build a career. Looking at my life choices, there is a distinctive correlation for me between not working and not being happy with what I'm pursuing. I'm not going to be happy if I'm 24 or 25 and can't support myself. But this realization is.... still kind of hard and painful. Especially when you're sitting in conversion class about intro. to Talmud and you wish that it wasn't already translated it into English. 

[hiddurmitzvah]

In hebrew the word I (אני) and nothing (אין) contains the same letters. I found it an interesting idea, that only the order makes the difference between “me” and the “nothingness”, so I made this drawing with the two words.

[yr-fave-sell-out]

Repeat after me

The compatibility of judaism and feminism is not confined to reform spaces

[steersqueersandhalacha]

Except given from The Jewish Standard:

This captivating music video begins with all the sounds of the Hebrew alphabet and takes flight into a surreal rendition of the image-rich poetry and prayers recited on the Sukkot festival.

Vocal artist Victoria Hanna researches ancient sacred Hebrew texts and sets them to music that explores their mystical nature in combination with contemporary modes of communication and symbols. Her work reveals transcendental aspects of voice, text, and spatial perception, as well as an astonishing vocal range and timbre

Much of the inspiration for her current work comes from Jerusalem, where the overlapping of past and present, ancient and modern, lies at the city’s very core.

Her work presents sacred Hebrew texts, prayers and spirituals in a unique and utterly modern context integrating theatre, music, spoken word and video.

Translation: Man and beast Flesh, spirit and soul Sinew, bone and skin Likeness and image - a tapestry Splendor resembling futility Compared to images of beasts Luster, figure and stature Renew the face of the earth Planting trees in desolate lands Winepresses and stacks of grain Vineyards and sycamores To the demarcated land To heal with powerful rains To give life to forsaken refuse To sustain with vegetation To enhance with sweet fruits To invigorate with flowers To rain on the sproutlings To pour a stream of cool waters To cloak with droplets To elevate the thirsty earth Which is suspended on silence

Lord who saves Other than You there is no Savior You are powerful and abundantly able to save I am impoverished Yet You shall save me God is the Savior God delivers and saves Those who cry to You - save Those who yearn for You - save Satisfy Your lambs Cause an abundance of crops, of trees, of vegetation - save Let the wind bring the soaring clouds Let the stormy rains roll in Let the clouds not be withheld God who opens a hand and satisfies Your thirsty ones - satisfy Your callers - save Your beloved - save You seekers - save Your wholesome ones - save

[steersqueersandhalacha]

World Wide Wrap is Tomorrow!

Not that I've bought tefillin yet, because it is expensive to do so, and I barely wake up for full Shacharit anyways. But I'm still going to go tomorrow and at least begin learning. I know that R is bringing hers, and that there will the spare pairs available for just the occasion. 

[jolieing]

[it-happened-one-night]

Relevant to this week and last week’s parshas.