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@stefanyrose
inspired by posts like this one e.e cummings,âi carry your heart with meâ// margaret atwood, selected poems (1965-1975) // virginia woolf, ânight and dayâ
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(C.B)(6.17.19)
hozier - work song
Rosalind M. Baker, from Woman Prayers: Prayers by Women; âBreakdown,â
Lovesong // The Cure
A moment that should have lasted forever and forever Long overâ Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â it came and went before I knew it existed. I think I know what it means, But every time I start to explain it, I forget the words.
Charles Wright, closing lines to ââ54 Chevy,â A Short History of the Shadow (Farrar, Straus, and Giroux, 2002)
parting is such sweet sorrow
I have held
funerals
for every version of me
that did not survive.
I have prayed
for every last soul.
I have been
so many women
in such little time.
Michelle K., Souls.
Weâre doing heartbreak now, amongst other things
We had lunch last Sunday. At my best friends house. You were wearing that shirt I like and i had my glasses on which I always knew you found kind of sexy. We were both a bit hungover from last night after drinking a bit too much and after having yet another drunken kiss, in a corner of a dying party, lips salty, foreheads touching, breathing mingled in the dark. We always had these kind of moments. I have been in love with you since we were sixteen years old. You had a girlfriend then who you loved more than she did. And she hurt you. But I was always there picking up the pieces. Now weâre nineteen. And I still love you. You do too, just not the way I deserve or I want you too. So weâre having lunch and youâre staring at me across the table. I am avoiding your eyes. I really wish that this time you would change your mind. I need you too. So after another lame attempt to catch my attention, I look up at you and that smile I reserve only for you inevitably escapes me. It warmed you. I know it did. But you have no intention in seeing me seriously. You know you have me. You know Iâll always be there. And you care only for that. You care only for these little nameless moments that you can confirm that yes Iâm still crazy in love with you and you can tuck your insecurities away for a short while. So yes you are my almost, you will always be my almost. And for you I will always be that girl who could be your savior. But you never dared to try. Well, maybe somedayâŚ
Val, writing prompt #67: write about an almost relationship, which broke your heart (via wordsnquotes)
I used to find you in the dictionary under the word rowdy. You were all scraped knees and chapped lips. You were ever-evolving; a complete whirlwind. Your middle name was Chaos. I miss your giddy screeches of delight and the way the breeze flirted with your hair those smoke stained evenings. Can you remember the dusks once full of too loud music and barely audible whispers? The air tasted of you and falling leaves and I could swear even the crickets stopped to listen to your humming. Which is why I canât wrap my head around why- or how, you let her tame you. Itâs almost as if you willingly went into the cage she led you to. Now you donât even care to break free and you no longer hum melodies and I avoid going out at night now because Iâm afraid of the quiet. I ache for the peace your violence once brought me. Everything is too still. I still have the dictionary, except now I rifle through the pages wondering where you take homage. I hope we find each other again.
Autumn Geçer/ roseysun (via wordsnquotes)
somedays, i will implode on myself. i will quietly shut down, no tears, no shouts, no alarms. i will be too cold, too distantâuntouchable and unreachable. donât panic. somedays, i will implode on myself. it wonât be your fault. let me recover, softly and slowly. hold me when i remember how to feel again. somedays, i will be reckless. i will be wild and unstoppable. i will jump off cliffs and taste like cigarettes and smell like booze. i will forget you and i will forget me and i will smile. i will smile, until it hurts and i will cry because it wonât be enough. somedays, i will be reckless. it wonât be your fault. wait until i am sober before you berate me, but know that it wonât be the last time. somedays, i will explode on you. suddenly, suddenly and all at once, i will yell and rage and hate. i will tear you apart with my words and i will not stop, even when you cry. know that i am sorry. it wonât be your fault. i could never hate you. all those words are meant for me, not you. let me remind you that you are too good for me. somedays, i will explode on you. let me apologize. somedays, i will be gentle. i will take you to museums and coffee shops and the world will feel bright and whole. i will make eggs and toast and dance in the kitchen with you. i will tell you about my favorite memories and you will think this is, this is how it is meant to be. it will end. it wonât be your fault. somedays, i will be gentle. remember that i am not always whole, remember the good comes with the bad. most days, i will be hard to love. it wonât be your fault. i will not blame you when you leave.
just-useless-things (via wordsnquotes)
Maybe itâs weird. Maybe itâs scary. Maybe it seems downright impossible to just beâto just let people know you want them, need them, feel like, in this very moment, you will die if you do not see them, hold them, touch them in some way whether its your feet on their thighs on the couch or your tongue in their mouth or your heart in their hands. But there is nothing more beautiful than being desperate. And there is nothing more risky than pretending not to care. We are young and we are human and we are beautiful and we are not as in control as we think we are.
Rachel C. Lewis, Tell the People you Love You Love Them (via wordsnquotes)
You kissed me like you planned on doing it again but you tasted like the kind of person who doesnât know how to stay and I think I could tell what you were thinking the moment you fell asleep that night I remember waking up so god damn early that morning and I spent hours while you were asleep hopingprayingwishing that youâd wake up and smile at me the way I needed you to But something cracked and changed whoever you were before that night didnât stay the moment you woke up that morning you looked away I guess what Iâm trying to explain is that people like you break hearts and never know how to mean what they say you act like youâre in it for the long haul and then itâs oh God canât we just stay friends but I mean Jesus Christ friends donât look at each other the way we did when we slept in each otherâs beds so itâs not you and me anymore you know itâs you me and everythingwe donât know how to say to each other so we hold it together in the way we never touch; we hold it together in the way we stay just friends if staying friends means seeing each other in familiar places and laughing and smiling like you didnât tear this to pieces
you didnât even have to explain (via loveserum)