Steve

Hey, it's Steve, the guy who sublets your spare room. I ate all the pickles and I probably use more of our bandwidth than I should, but hey- at least I'm quiet and I pay the rent on time, right?You probably forgot I still live here. That's okay, it happens all the time. I just came out to tell you we're out of mayo.

[stevefromupstairs]

What I'm like

Idk why I always put my foot in my mouth but I think I'm maybe a lot less formal than everyone else is these days. Not here to offend anyone, just around to mix things up a little bit and maybe ask to borrow your butter from the fridge.

[axemetaphor]

theyre so talented at getting banned from places that they got banned from this church without even setting foot inside

original:

[radiatorchains]

[fearsherald]

How good are you at skateboards and do you think you could reliably skateboard out of danger if the situation called for it?

I’m as good at skateboarding as a just born horse is good at walking in straight line, but if you hand me a scooter I’ll be faster then flash (don’t tell him I said that don’t tell any flash I said that don’t please they keep pushing me of roofs and catching me then putting me back on the roof over and over)

[stevefromupstairs]

Scooter is a no go because you absolutely must do a sick kickflip when the explosion goes off. Also in this plan you will be carrying me bridal style.

[fearsherald]

I’ll learn how skateboard for you❤️

[stevefromupstairs]

A true romantic. Perfect. Now we can take the nuclear solution to cleaning the bathroom. The society living in there is getting more hostile by the day.

[untitledunhingedrpblogdontfollow]

Hey bud I really don't know what kinda gizmo you rigged up to the door but I for real cannot answer riddles to get into the bathroom. I come to you with a full bladder and seared off fingertips. Pity me.

If you can't figure out the code, you'll have to find somewhere other than my bathroom. ...How did you get in here, anyway?

[stevefromupstairs]

I don't know how I got in here. I don't know how to get out. I'm like a stray cat. Or a bad smell. I will let you borrow my ps5 if you let me use the bathroom

[untitledunhingedrpblogdontfollow]

. . . Get out of my house.

[stevefromupstairs]

I think you mean OUR house, comrade. Please don't kill me. I will get you my rent payment tomorrow. Friday at the latest. Especially if you un-boobytrap the bathroom first. Or drag me into a super cool montage where I become good at riddles.

[fearsherald]

How good are you at skateboards and do you think you could reliably skateboard out of danger if the situation called for it?

I’m as good at skateboarding as a just born horse is good at walking in straight line, but if you hand me a scooter I’ll be faster then flash (don’t tell him I said that don’t tell any flash I said that don’t please they keep pushing me of roofs and catching me then putting me back on the roof over and over)

[stevefromupstairs]

Scooter is a no go because you absolutely must do a sick kickflip when the explosion goes off. Also in this plan you will be carrying me bridal style.

[harvey-dent-real]

Yo harvs I'm ordering pizza. You want pepperoni or beef?

[Harvey takes out his coin and flips it.]

. . . Beef.

[stevefromupstairs]

Wicked. I want pepp so I'm gonna go half/half. Beef on the left.

[untitledunhingedrpblogdontfollow]

Hey bud I really don't know what kinda gizmo you rigged up to the door but I for real cannot answer riddles to get into the bathroom. I come to you with a full bladder and seared off fingertips. Pity me.

If you can't figure out the code, you'll have to find somewhere other than my bathroom. ...How did you get in here, anyway?

[stevefromupstairs]

I don't know how I got in here. I don't know how to get out. I'm like a stray cat. Or a bad smell. I will let you borrow my ps5 if you let me use the bathroom

[kingofpuzzles-deactivated202408]

Hey man I know your, um, fans are pretty hard core, but could you like let me know next time you're expecting, um, "angry fanmail" because I blew my eyebrows off when clearing the mail slot earlier.

That was my fans? I’d expect that from joker.

[stevefromupstairs]

Maybe he's sending you bombs in the mail. Is he a fan of your work?

[inkandichxr]

Heyyyyyy sorry do you know if there's supposed to be paper doll people running around outside? Because they make me uneasy but if they're yours then, like. That's cool, I guess? Do they eat?

This confused the absolute shit out of me for a hot minute, my dude. I'm on too much cold medicine. I like your gig, I think you're entertaining.

They totally eat.

[stevefromupstairs]

Do they eat cold medicine?

Do they eat me?

I have like two priorities and one is my survival and the other is your survival.

[stevefromupstairs]

If you're reading this, consider yourself tagged.

I want all of you in on this.

Rule 1: Post the rules

Rule 2: ANSWER ALL THE QUESTIONS that the tagger asked and set 10 new ones.

Rule 3: Tag 10 people and link them to your post

Rule 4: let them know you’ve tagged them.

1) Which Lord of the Rings character is your favourite?

that gollum dude was pretty rad in a fucked up kinda way

2) From the fandom your RP character is from, who do you relate to the most? (Doesn’t have to be your character!)

dave probably since john’s a fucking strange one

actually can i pick the dog

3) You, me, RP?

what’s rp and does it mean i have to clean my room

4) What’s your favourite planet? (Moons and suns don’t count.)

shit. uh, jupiter is pretty badass

5) Do you know the Muffin Man?

to be honest bro i’m hoping you’re not talking about the man made of muffins that i accidentally ate because that was actually not fun and made me sick for a long time

6) Who would you suggest I follow if I’m looking for new rp partners? (Because I’m looking for more people to follow and rp with ;D)

shit, just browse my tag and see whose answers you like best

7) A plane crashes on the Canadian/Amercian border, which side do you bury the survivors on?

flip a coin?

8) Do you know where the phrase “My very elegant mother just served us nine pizzas” comes from?

my mom always makes too much pizza

9) As your character, please leave my character a message on an answering machine - don’t care about what. (It’s Gabriel btw ;D)

uh hi man it’s steve can you come and get me from the supermarket, my car broke down.

10) Dave’s new puppy is attached to a pole in the backyard with a 10 foot leash. The puppy has ruined all the grass within its reach and now the lawn must be replaced. One package of grass seed covers 20 square feet and costs $3.50. How much will it cost Dave to reseed the lawn?

honestly dave don’t get a new puppy the last one is probably going to come back again before too long anyway. you know how that dog is.

NEW QUESTIONS

1. best use of pickles?

2. if you could only have one type of condiment in the house what would it be?

3. do you mind if my rent is a few days late this week?

4. up for a video game marathon on saturday? what game do you pick?

5. scariest shit you’ve ever seen?

6. do you have siblings? what do you think of them?

7. did you remember you owe me money? (looking at you, john)

8. least favourite room of the house to clean?

9. most complicated / delicious thing you know how to cook?

10. there’s a monster made out of spiders in the bathroom. 

[talentforlying]

@stevefromupstairs: Shit fuck sorry John I might have smoked whatever that herb blend you left on the counter was and on the one hand it did fuck me up properly but on the other hand how worried should I be about getting possessed by something?

. . . . . . swamp thing?? you smoked dried-up swamp thing?? rude bastard, i was going to do that. right, i'm putting your possession chances at a solid fifty-fifty, and i'm takin' my bloody key back.

[stevefromupstairs]

Oh fuck okay, okay. Any tips for, um, not getting possessed by your leafy ex?

Will consuming a lot of Doritos help?

Will giving you a lot of Doritos help?

[stromcuzewon]

#john cheese

[finniestoncrane]

Yo, are you more into pickles or gherkins? Is there a difference?

neither!! i like these bad boys

[stevefromupstairs]

Do you think they'd work against vampires? Or is that a garlic exclusive?

[hellforestrp]

Hey I dunno if this is worth worrying about at all but like. I saw a weird deer earlier. It had too many legs I think? Like a centi-deer. It went all the way around the house. I didn't know what to do so I just kind of napped for a bit and then later it was gone. You think it'll come back?

Cool monster design. Reminds me of long horse. Also, what is this ask an ARG or something?

[canadian-riddler]

Ohhhhhhhh hey how's, um, how's life? Look I broke one of those question mark trophy thingies and I'm so sorry. Do you think a jar of pickles would work as a substitute? Batman will probably be excited to find pickles right?

A gherkin for his jerkin? Why not

[pleaseandthanksyou]

Signs you would definitely find in Undisclosed