pls like and reblog if you enjoyed! feel free to request anything <3
a = affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection?)
very.
like... very.
have you seen this man? he's so full of love he's almost overflowing with it
we see how he is with the other members, very physically affectionate whether they like it or not!
i feel like with his s/o he would be just as affectionate, if not more so!
so prepared to be tackled by him and completely attacked by cuddles because this man is gonna be all over you
very affectionate with his words too, just showers you with praise and compliments until it's almost embarrassing! but if you do the same to him he gets super shy it's so cute abshddncje
b = best friend (what would they be like as a best friend?)
oh imagine being best friends with chan, what a dream...
you would bring out his inner dork
like his dorkiness will magnify like 99% more than usual
likes to be weird with you. like making the silly noises he does and teasing you gently
both of you are just being goofballs together, such goals.
he's like always smiling when he's with his best friend idk
c = cuddles (do they like to cuddle? how would they cuddle?)
when i tell you that cuddles are a must!l
like i said before, he's super affectionate
with chan, it feels natural with his s/o in his arms. he isn't clingy but he is just full of love and wants to show it in any way he can!
he gets so snuggly, especially in the evenings hbhdbfjf
he likes to cuddle in any way possible so long as you're both comfy
loves holding you but also loves being held
like after a long day at work he wants nothing more than to just sink in your arms, laying his head on your chest while you run your fingers through his soft fluffy hair
and he will chatter on and on about his day and you will just lay there, stroking his hair, listening and smiling and humming every now and then as he talks about how his music is going, what the lyrics to his new song are about, etc...
idk its just a very cute and fluffy time now let me go cry into a pillow-
d = domestic (do they want to settle down? how are they around the house?)
settling down? of course, of course... eventually.
you both have plenty of time ahead of you, being young and all. so there's no need to rush into certain things
settling down will take a lot of time and trust for chan, and his focus on his career is something he needs to consider.
so when you guys are older, settling down is totally happening.
what's he like around the house? well, he's tidy!
everything is in it's place, so if you are like me and not very organised, he's got you covered
i feel like chan would split domestic tasks with his s/o just so it's equal? but depending on how much time he has it might be difficult for him to keep up his end of the bargain, being so busy and all
e = ending (if they had to break up with their s/o, how would they do it?)
gently
that's all i gotta say, but lemme elucidate, for angst purposes...
he would probably sit you down one day, a serious, grave look on his face
it would be hard for him to look you in the eyes because he knows if he did it would make him weaker
with a calm, low voice he would break the news and explain himself
would only meet your gaze when you responded with silence, and as your eyes connect his heart would break...
chan wants to focus on his career. only when he is older will he consider actually getting married
but i am so convinced that chan will only go out with someone he sees him having a long-term relationship with. he's not the type to just date for the sake of it, he wants to be with someone who is willing to stick by him in the long run. loyalty is super important to him
g = gentle (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)
so, so gentle.
we know what this man is like. he has such a naturally caring disposition, as well as being very emotionally intelligent
he's basically the human form of empathy so anytime you are feeling down or anxious he will notice and he will comfort you the best he can
in terms of being gentle physically, obviously he will make sure you are never in harm's way
the only time i can see him not being as gentle is if yall got into a tickle or pillow fight, he would restrain your arms and tickle you mercilessly istg-
beware of this one. he might look cute but once he's in a playful mood, stay on guard!
h = hugs (do they like hugs? how often do they do it? what are their hugs like?)
chan is hands down the best hugger on the planet
that's not me just saying that, it's scientific fact
we know he loves hugs. he hugs his members all the time and even gives us stays a hug and the end of his lives
hugging chan would make you feel so safe and secure in his arms.
firm yet comforting, with his arms wrapped around your waist as you perch your chin on his shoulder
he's just such a softie hbfhdhnf
also appreciates back hugs too
like come up to him from behind, wrap your arms around his waist, and stroke his tummy whilst squishing the side of your face onto his back
he will turn into a giggly, blushing mess yk.
i = i love you (how fast do they say the L-word?)
trust and love go hand-in-hand for him
saying the beloved L-word would be a big deal for him. it's something he doesn't say that often despite being such a loving person
saying 'i love you' to someone leaves you feeling very vulnerable, like you're putting your heart out on the line. so when chan does say these three magic words, it will mean his feelings are sincere and lasting
and it means he trusts you with his heart. so please cherish it.
j = jealousy (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they're jealous?)
i feel like chan is pretty balanced in this sense?
like I know some people view him as Possessive-Werewolf-Alpha Daddy-Chan lmfao i'm so sorry or they view him as being super-duper carefree and not being jealous at all
but i kind of see a middle ground
i think the only time he will properly get jealous would be if you guys have had an argument and then you test his patience by flirting with someone else
depending on how subtle the flirting is, chan's jaw might clench as he looks on with a blank stare, eyebrows furrowing in amusement as he crosses his arms over his chest
just... don't test him like that, it's not worth it even though its very hawt
k = kisses (what are their kisses like? where do they like to kiss their partner? where do they like to be kissed?)
chan seems like the soft peck type of guy
he will leave little kisses on your lips, cheeks and forehead, partly because he thinks its cute and partly because he wants to tease you
he knows you want his plump, soft lips on placed on yours for much longer, so when you grab his jaw and smoosh your lips with his he grins playfully but softly into the kiss
idk he is very soft for you it's almost sickly sweet-
and yk when a partner rubs their nose with their partner's nose?
you best believe channie-boy is doing that
and sometimes he nuzzles his nose into your neck when he's sleepy and gives you tiny little neck kisses why do I do this to myself.
l = little ones (how are they around children?)
he loves children. he just thinks everything they do is adorable and he will do anything he asks them to do
acts like its his life goal to make the little ones laugh
he will pull random faces and tickle them just to earn a simple smile from them,. it fills his heart up with so much joy!
but if he makes a child cry then he takes it as a personal offence and reevaluates if he's a good person or not-
m = morning (how are mornings spent with them?)
if you watched the most recent chan's room with him being full of cold and his voice is like super low (he needs to rest dammit), well that's kinda what his voice sounds like when he wakes up
low and grumbly
he peaks at you with one eye open and smiles sleepily. lord knows he doesn't wanna get out of that bed but he knows he has to
will probably rope you into a workout or smth
just make sure he has breakfast before he leaves for work!
n = nights (how are nights spent with them?)
chan is more of a night person
meaning he stays up all night working and doesn't get back until the early hours of the morning
if you want to accompany him in the studio, he might protest and be like 'nooo you need your beauty sleep' but he will let it slide because he really enjoys your company
occasionally will put his work down to just talk to you about trivial things
when he gets really tired he will lean back in his chair, swivel round and look at you with a crooked smile.
"hey babe, do you wanna head home?"
once you're both home he will pull a blanket over both of you and cuddle you to his chest
you guys will either stay up all night talking more or drift off to sleep in each other's arms
o = open (when would they start revealing things about themselves?)
it takes time for chan to trust people
i think he mentioned in one of the 2 kids room episodes or smth like that that he doesn't trust people that easily or that quickly?
chan is obviously outgoing and friendly, and can pretty much speak to anyone and make friends easily
but actually trusting them takes time and energy. he will have an invisible guard up to protect himself from disappointment
however, as more time progress and he begins to trust his partner more, he will open up more and will become more vulnerable
p = patience (how easily angered are they?)
he has a lot of patience, usually
growing up pretty much taking care of the other 7 members, with all their many different personalities and opinions to consider, he wouldn't have lasted this long without patience
it would take chan a lot to get genuinely angry. sure, everyone gets irritated about petty things now and then. but if chan feels genuinely angry it would definitely be about something recurring and serious
q = quizzes (how much would they remember about their partner?)
he will remember cute, little, almost trivial stuff about you
but these things aren't trivial to him
no, he cherishes all this information. he knows what your favourite colour was when you were four. he knows you bought yourself an ice cream to cheer yourself up after a bad interview. he knows the ice-skating incident you had in 2016
he loves cute little things you tell him and will store them in his memory only to bring them up in conversation randomly at like 2am
r = remember (what is their favourite moment in your relationship?)
yk it's really hard for him to decide
you have become such an important person in his life that every moment with you is just *chefs kiss* perfect!
but one of his favourite moments he realises, looking back on your time together, is when you have fallen asleep on the couch in his studio
you were persistent in staying with him while he works, ignoring his gentle protests. you were catching up with work of your own, but as the hours progressed your eyelids felt heavier and heavier. you were consciously fighting the urge to sleep until you gave in, drifting off gently
so when chan turned around he was met with your cute, curled-up body, snoring softly. he wasn't surprised you fell asleep, but your sleeping form endeared him. a smile spread across his face as he chuckled softly, grabbing a blanket and tucking you in
why was this his favourite moment? it seems so simple. and it happens so frequently. but to him, these moments are when he realises how much he appreciates you. your comforting presence and need to take care of him makes him feel so loved and safe
s = security (how protective are they? would they like to be protected?)
very protective
i think most of his have seen that clip from the stray kids concert of chan's heartfelt speech, saying how he will protect all his members and all of us stays. protecting the ones he loves is clearly a priority of his
he would like to protect his partner in all aspects, but mainly from emotional harm
and he would like you to do the same for him. both of you protect each other from emotional harm because you guys support each other, giving each other a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear
t = try (how much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
channie is romantic af
when he has the time, he loves putting in the effort and setting up cute little dates with you, like making your favourite meal for you
he considers you hanging out in his studio as a date, and soon studio dates become a regular thing for you both!
u = ugly (what would be some bad habits of theirs?)
we all know channie is a perfectionist
which isn't a bad thing
it just means that when things aren't up to scratch in his standards, he will beat himself up about it
he will get down about himself if he hasn't taken you on any special dates in a while, or he forgets a special anniversary etc...
so try to reassure him that he is enough, and that he's doing perfectly just how he is!
because sometimes your reassuring words can bring a lot of comfort to him <3
v = vanity (how concerned are they with their looks?)
being an idol, chan is pretty much forced to care about the way he looks
we have seen on his past lives that he has shown distaste for the way he looks
he is human. he is like all of us
he has good days and bad days. one day he might feel hella confident in the way he looks as he freaking should but other days he will hide his face as much as he possibly can
which is ridiculous because he is the most handsomest man on the planet
w = whole (would they feel incomplete without you?)
so chan has a very mature approach to relationships
he believes that two people should be complete as individuals, maturing and accepting who they are and relying on themselves before they get into a relationship
that way, you have two healthy individuals trying their best instead of one relying on the other or not reciprocating the same effort or amount of love
did that make any sense lmfao
the point I'm trying to make is doesn't see it as being 'incomplete' without you. but rather, he feels like he is a much, much better version of himself when he is with you
x - xtra (a random headcanon for them.)
chan loves you in his hoodies
that's it, that's all i gotta say
he just gets so endeared by the fact that you want to wear them
the first time you stole one of his favourite black hoodies, he chuckled
"do you want me to buy you one like that? it looks so cute on you!"
he will poke your cheeks and cuddle you while you explain that you like his hoodies because they smell like him :(
then he'll understand, and will basically give you free rein to take his hoodies so long as you don't spill anything on them
y = yuck (what are some things they wouldn't like, either in general or in a partner?)
in general, chan doesn't like people who are completely selfish and only look out for their self-interests
or if they have no sense of compassion or empathy
he's fine with tough love, don't get me wrong, but someone who is devoid of empathy or makes no effort to understand someone else's point of view is someone chan tends to avoid
z = zzz (what is a sleep habit of theirs?)
his sleeping habit is... he has no sleeping habits
my man doesn't sleep
okay, okay so when he does actually sleep he snores, we know this
likes to cuddle something when he sleeps so having you in his arms would be of great comfort!
also he said on bubble he tends to sleep naked nowadays so i will leave that one with you-
skz reaction to there s/o have lots of tattoos (fluff pls) š«¶š
stray kids reaction to their s/o having tattoos
genre: fluff
warnings: none
please like and reblog if you enjoy <33
bangchan
he would LOVE your tattoos. will spend forever and ever tracing his fingers of tattooed skin with a sparkle of admiration glimmering in his eye, a fond smile on his face. it's as if each day he's seeing them for the very first time, finding something new to appreciate about the way they look. in short, he lives them very much <3
minho
if you haven't gotten a cat tattoo he will express his deep and earnest disappointment. because... he just be like that. but seriously, he loves your tattoos. likes it when you show them off too instead of covering them up. he wants them to be āØfreeāØ, yk? finds himself staring at them and then denying it if you catch him out on it. he just thinks they're hella pretty!
changbin
it's the times when you're working out with him and your tattoos are on full display that he just melts inside. usually it wouldn't phase him but damn seeing you like this makes his mind wander to other things... thinks your tattoos are really sexy and will tell you every day without fail. with love a consistent king š
hyunjin
he likes tattoos. admires them like pieces of artwork. because that's what they are to him. on your skin, they are art. he loves the freedom of expression and the different mediums of expressing oneself. the fact you found that through your tattoos makes him love and admire you even more. he likes knowing why you got them. the stories behind them. the deep meanings. everything.
han
thinks your look cool and badass and hot and loves your tattoos so much EEEEEEEEEE. you make him wanna get a tattoo so badly (he's kind of a wimp tho so it will take a lot of persuading and reassurance). just loves the way your tattoos look and tends to stare at them when he phases out and goes into a little daze. you let him look because, ay, what's the harm?
felix
before yall started dating, he was super intimidated and super attracted to you all at once. you're definitely the type he would want to get to know. and now that he had you? he can't help but tell you how awesome and cool he thinks your tattoos are. he wants to know why you get them and if you were going to get any more. may even give you some ideas for your next one!
seungmin
loves to absent-mindedly traces his fingertips along the designs of your tattoos when you guys are cuddled up to each other, staring at them, looking deep in thought. if you question him he will reply with a 'huh?', not even raising his head as he continues to stroke your designs. just loves how they look against your skin.
jeongin
definitely the type to get matching tattoos. like, that's just his thing. he has to. you like tattoos. and he likes you. it's a win-win situation! he thinks your tattoos are cool and pretty and wants to join in on the fun himself. he appreciates them as being a sort of... fashion statement, in a way. a definite way to express yourselves.
You smile to yourself as you stare out the window. It feels so surreal that you're living with Chan now. The two of you have been dating for a little over three years when he asked if you wanted to get a place together.
The taxi you're in pulls up to your apartment building, stopping completely before parking the vehicle. āDo you need help, Miss?ā He asks you, glancing into the backseat.
āI'm okay, thank you!ā You tell him, grabbing the bags of groceries. You exit the vehicle, leaning down again. āThank you again! Have a wonderful night.ā
He waves to you before taking off. You adjust the bags in your hands, walking up the steps of your building. It takes almost five minutes to get to your apartment door.
You set your bags down so you can retrieve your house key. You grab all the bags with one hand while opening the door. You gently shut the door behind you and bring the groceries into the kitchen.
āChan? Baby, I'm home,ā you call out into the quiet apartment. You begin putting stuff away, humming to yourself.
By the time you're done, Chan still hasn't come to greet you. You call his name once more, walking towards your shared bedroom. You halt your footsteps upon hearing the bathroom door open.
Chan walks out completely naked, causing your eyes to widen. You gasp pretty loudly, startling the man in front of you. You cover your eyes with your hands, feeling the tips of your ears burn.
āY/N! You scared me, baby,ā Chan laughs, his hand pressed against his heart.
You blush, standing still in the middle of the hallway. āYou'reā¦ you're naked,ā you stutter over your words, keeping your eyes covered.
Your boyfriend chuckles, and you can hear him come closer. His hands gently wrap around your wrists, pulling your hands away. āBaby, we've been dating for three years. You've seen me naked before,ā he tells you with a raised brow, amusement in his eyes.
āYeah, butāā You pause, finding your gaze trailing down his torso.
Chan moves one of his hands to your face, lifting your chin before you're able to see his mmh. You swallow thickly, looking into his dark eyes. He smirks at you, tapping your chin with his thumb.
āDo you want me to put clothes on, baby?ā He asks, tilting his head a bit. He leans forward, placing feathery kisses on your cheek. āI don't want you to be uncomfortable.ā
āI'm notā¦ I'm not opposed to you walking around completely nude,ā you mention while resting your hands on his pecs. āI'm just confused as to why you're naked.ā
Chan laughs, removing his hand from your face to rub the back of his neck. āIf I'm completely comfortable, I like to not wear anything,ā he confesses with flushed cheeks.
āDid you do this at your old apartment? With the boys?ā You ask him, surprised by his confession. You never would've guessed this from him. Especially with the way he'll get shy with compliments.
He nods his head and starts to walk into your bedroom. You bite your lip as your eyes glance down to his ass, internally groaning.
āBaby, I'm okay with you not wearing clothes,ā you reassure him, watching your boyfriend slowly put on sweatpants.
āAre you sure?ā Chan asks, sitting down on the edge of the mattress.
You nod your head, tucking some hair behind your ear while standing between his spread legs. āOf course. I'm grateful that you're that comfortable around me,ā you giggle, resting your forearms on his shoulders. āI just never expected that from you.ā
Chan laughs, wrapping his arms around your waist. āI'm full of surprises, baby,ā he smirks and tugs your body closer to his.
Summary ~ More of my delulu little ideas on paper for Bang Chan (or just dating head cannons I have for Christopher Bang Chan)
A.N. - I wouldnāt say Channie is my bias in Stray Kids but I do know I love him with my whole heart and he deserves so much love and care
A.N. 2 - this was the first of the group I wrote for and I got lost in my feels and I actually cried a bit I love him and they kind of jump from topic to topic lmao
A.N. 3 - I KNOW CHAN IS ON DELULU STAYS ABOUT FANFIC AND SHIT AND IF I EVER GET CAUGHT BEST KNOW I AM SIMPLY POOFING FROM EXISTENCE
Baby, Babygirl are names I know many many people agree on him calling you and I honestly hated the name until I truly thought about him
Swings your attached hands when walking and would make you do spins by lifting his hand sometimes or would swing your hands over your shoulder so heās resting his arm on your shoulder and pulls you to his side
He would hold you by your hips a lot
Would move you by your hips too, like when he would try to scoot behind you to get something he would just lift you by your hips and place you beside him as he passes by
Overall loves to lift you
Every so often he would lift you from the bed to the car
Youāre shifted so your facing him while sitting and heās holding your hand
Would play soft music and in the soft atmosphere you two would whisper to not shatter the silence
Pulls out a blanket from the back seat and cover you while you slowly drift in and out
Parks the car at a quaint location, perfect sky view
Carries you bridal style to the trunk and sets you on the bed of pillows and blankets
He lays on his back and tucks you into his left side, head on his shoulder/neck/left side of his chest
His left arm is folded back to hold your head and runs his hands through your hair
His right arm runs along the expanse of your open skin on your arms/waist/hips and would bring it up to your cheek while staring at you
You feel lost in his voice and how comfortable you feel with him that you drift again while he whispers to you about the boys or comebacks or his day or just his love for you
As the sun rises/sets he gets photos of the beautiful view for you and some of you on his phone for himself
As you struggle to stay awake to spend more time with your boy, he smiles gently and whispers āYou can sleep now, love, itās okā
Sobs.
Heās the type to not only make playlists for you but songs about you, for you
I think he, compared to some others in this group, would be less obvious about it being about you or direct with the lyrics
I think when he shows it to you, while you sit on his lap in the recording room, you of course love it and when he says itās about you, you probably cry
He just casually mentions that the chord progression or the overall feel of the song is how he felt meeting you or falling in love with you and you whip around to face him and he just stares into your soul
You fall into his arms and he wraps one arm fully around your back and the other behind your head and just laughs his gorgeous, joyous laugh
Knows all the boyfriend rules ofc (sidewalk rule, holding the cart at the store, etc.)
Heās a natural
Sometimes when he has insomnia you try to stay with him for as long as possible since thatās really the only time you see him, at night, since heās busy a lot
He really really appreciates it but one time you lay or sit on his lap and fall asleep on him while trying really hard to stay awake and once he knows youāre out he cries because heās just so overwhelmed with emotion and love
Youāre his biggest fan (personally I believe when he calls stays babygirl through the camera heās only talking to you)
If you learned his other language be it his native australian or korean (and be it for him or not) he would probably cry
No matter what, you always end the day in his arms, angry or not and i personally believe heās not the type to go to bed angry
If youāre the type of person to fall off your phone/social media for days/weeks on end like me I think heād understand but would want to have your location just to know youāre ok
Would probably call you when he knows your done with school/work on those types of days
Biggest, warmest, whole body hugs where all you feel is him
Knows your smell/touch/voice by heart and smiles whenever he gets a sense of it
If youāre the chaotic, wanders off on their own a bit/ child wanderer type, heād gain another parent instinct of grabbing on to you while continuing whatever heās doing/ talking to without pause
I think about it a lot more recently on how he doesnāt love himself and it scratches at my heart raw and the only way I think I can ever die peacefully is by knowing someone taught him to love himself the way I love and absolutely adore him as do millions of other people.
a/n: this is a drabble i wrote cause i was bored :) hope uāll like it <3
Chan invited you over for a movie night so of course you agreed.
you were laying on his chest as the two of you were watching some random movie. a huge bowl of popcorn next to him as you fed it to each other.
his apartment was really cold and you were shivering. you put you hands under the hoodie he was wearing. as your hands came in contact with his warm body, he jumped up.
ājesus, precious. your hands are freezing.ā he laughs.
āyouāre so warm. heat me up!ā you pout.
āare you that cold?ā he asks with a worried look on his face as you grin.
you shrug and keep hugging him tightly, holding your hands on his warm chest. he sways the two of you back and forth, almost rocking you to sleep.
you shiver again, so he lifts you a little off of his chest. he pulls his hoodie off of his body and pulls it down your body. itās so big it looks like a dress on you, but it was so warm and you were engulfed with his scent and the smell of his cologne.
āyou smell so good.ā you smile happily as the hoodie hugs you in a thick and comfortable fabric. āarenāt you cold?ā you frown as he keeps laying there in his thin shirt.
he shakes his head and bear hugs you. you giggle and he picks you up, nuzzling his face in your neck, inhaling your scent.
āput me down Channie!ā you giggle as he twirls the two of you around and he laughs too. he showers your face with kisses. āi love you. i love you. i love you.ā he says showering your face in kisses, as you cuddle his head into your chest.
āi love you. i love you. i love you moreee.ā he gasps dramatically, a laugh falling from his lips.
ānot possible. never. i wonāt allow it.ā he crosses his arms sassily.
āwell, it is true. i am so in love with you and thereās nothing you can do about it.ā you tell him in an equally sassy voice and a fake serious face.
āoh really? nothing?ā he looks at you, a big smile plastered across his face.
ānope. absolutely nothing.ā he then pulls you into a soft yet passionate kiss as he takes your hands in his.
āare you warmed up now?ā you admire his face and his cute dimples.
āyes and i get to steal your hoodies. so itās a win-win for me.ā you laugh at his pouty face.
āthatās not what we agreed on.ā he jokes.
āoh, i think it is. this is what you signed up for when we started dating.ā you say, pulling the hoodie over both your legs.
āi donāt think i signed up for you to steal my clothed and my heart.ā you blush at his statement.
āwell, i look really good in your clothes and your arms.ā you look up at him.
"Chris!" Y/N hissed in a loud whisper. "Chris, I can't breathe."
Chan's eyes widened. He hastily removed his hoodie that he had draped rather energetically over Y/N's head, and Y/N gasped dramatically as fresh air from the car settled inside her lungs again.
"Sorry baby," Chan hummed apologetically. He reached out and caressed his hand down the woman's hair, his eyes softening as he leaned forward to slowly kiss her forehead. "I just ā¦ you know what the fans are like. I love them but they're crazy ā¦ especially the ones who come to see us at the airport. I don't want you to go through a hard time because they've figured out you're with me. Can you imagine? āOh my gosh, who's that girl with Bang Chan ā¦ how dare she breathe the same oxygen as him. That should be me!ā"
Y/N giggled at the silly voice that escaped Chan's mouth and the way his hands fluttered in the air beside his head as he emphasised his words. She curled her fingers into his and squeezed his hand gratefully. "Don't worry about me, baby. You know I can protect myself."
"I know you can," Chan hummed. "But you know I want to protect you so you don't have to protect yourself."
"Okay. But ā¦ maybe let's leave the hoodie? I think walking around in the airport with this over my head is gonna attract more attention than without it," Y/N laughed, handing the man's hoodie back to him.
Chan chuckled. He nodded and slipped the grey material over his head, almost knocking Y/N in the face in the process. "Yeah, you're right. But hey, I know ā¦ ā
Reaching for his leather bag, Chan rifled through it and pulled out two items; he held them out to Y/N with a twinkle in his eye.
āWear these?ā Chan hummed.
Y/N adhered the mask to the lower portion of her face before opening Chan's glasses case; it was home to one of his favourite pairs of sunglasses, and Y/N unfolded the sleek black legs before propping them up against the bridge of her nose as the world around her dimmed.
"How do I look?" Y/N asked. She reached out and cheekily pulled the cap off of Chan's head and placed it over her own hair. She then flipped the hood of her jacket over the cap, folding her arms across her chest in satisfaction as a goofy expression crossed her face. "Am I undetectable?"
"Hmm, I don't know ā¦ " Chan mused. "If you're undetectable, how is it that I can still detect your beauty?"
Y/N groaned behind her mask as Chan burst into peals of laughter. She shook her head and was thankful for the coverage the mask provided when she felt her cheeks heat up.
"I can live with that," Chan grinned as he slid his arm around her waist. He pulled her closer to him as much as he could with the seatbelts restricting them both. Kissing her masked cheek, Chan smiled happily at her. "Are you ready?"
Y/N shook her head. "Yes. No. Yes."
"Don't worry," Chan pressed one last kiss to her nose before unbuckling her belt, and then his. "I'll protect you. If they even lay a finger on you, I'm gonna - "
"Woah there, Casanova," Y/N patted Chan's arm, the name making him burst into laughter all over again. "Don't do anything stupid. The whole point is for me to not get any attention, right? If someone does touch me, you're gonna have to ignore it or my cover - " she tilted her head up as she adjusted the cap beneath her hood, " - will be blown."
Chan sighed. He let go of her hand reluctantly, his face contorting in dramatic sadness and he pretended to weep into Y/N's shoulder. "I can't even hold your hand in there."
Y/N giggled. She threw her arms around the man and squeezed him in a bear hug, enjoying the trickle of his scent that escaped past her mask.
"You'll live," Y/N said, nuzzling her nose against Chan's cheek. "Once we're on the plane you can hold my hand as much as you want."
Chan smiled at that. "Perks of first class, aye?"
Nodding, Y/N stared out of the tinted window. She bit her lip. "It's already crazy out there."
"Scared?" Chan asked, tickling her side. "Remember, I'll protect y - "
"I know," Y/N groaned, turning around and squishing his face in her hand. "I. Know. You'll protect me. I get it."
Lowering her mask slightly, Y/N pressed a doting kiss on Chan's lips; Chan squeezed her tightly in his arms as he returned the kiss, and Y/N smiled against his lips when she felt the man's tension melt off of him considerably against the curve of her arms.
āIt'll be okay,ā Y/N grinned. āJust ā¦ relax, okay?ā
Chan grinned. He nodded and kissed Y/N's forehead.
āI love you,ā Chan whispered.
Y/N tickled his cheek. āI love you.ā
The front of her cap suddenly banged against Chan's eyebrow as she attempted to lean a little closer, and Chan burst into hushed wheezes as he rubbed at his skin.
āI stole your hat,ā Y/N giggled. She reached out to pull it off of her head but Chan placed his hand over hers before gently tucking the stray pieces of her hair underneath his cap.
āKeep it,ā Chan said. āIt looks good on you. Just don't headbutt me.ā
Rifling her fingers through Chan's slightly flattened curls, Y/N replaced her mask over her nose again before turning to the car door. She stepped out before Chan, and she could immediately feel the clouds of anxiety rolling off of his body as he stood behind her for a moment.
But with the crinkle of her eyes as she lowered her glasses and looked at him over her shoulder, Y/N transferred a silent flicker of reassurance to him and she giggled inwardly when she saw his own eyes transform into crescent moons in response.
Behind his mask, Chan exhaled slowly. It took every fibre of his being to stop himself from reaching out and sliding his hand into Y/N's; it was late, yet every flash that shone at them like a permanent beam of light from the constant photography that had erupted around them made it seem like it was the middle of the day. Chan waited for his band members to emerge from their cars, his eyes anxious as he watched Y/N tail the group of staff. She fit right in with the female staff, the cap she had borrowed from him hiding her hair and the glasses on her nose hiding the top part of her face.
Chan didn't know if it was because he was deeply in love with her or not, but he felt that no matter how much she was covered up, she would still manage to radiate the aura of being the most beautiful person he had ever laid eyes on.
Swallowing thickly, Chan ran his fingers through his hair as he looked down at the ground. He really hoped the photographers wouldn't capture the love hearts he was sure were exploding again and again in the centre of his pupils.
Once they started moving towards the inside of the airport, Chan made sure to keep an eye on Y/N at all times. Everything seemed to be going smoothly until a barricade of fans suddenly crashed into the group once they were waiting in line; Chan's eyes widened as a particularly unruly young girl hurtled herself towards him and in the process, barging Y/N to the side. The fan's phone collided with Y/N's cheek and Chan's breath hitched.
Y/N stumbled; with so many people on top of each other, no one saw when Chan dodged from the fan's grip and curled his fingers into the hem of Y/N's hoodie, pulling her upright and preventing her from landing face first into the security poles.
Y/N was startled when she saw the man's eyes; they were brimming with roaring fire, annoyance and anger sizzling through his body. She knew his emotions were directed towards the bodyguards that were supposed to be doing their job properly. But for some reason, whenever they were needed the most, they seemed to dissipate and vanish into thin air.
Chaos seemed to ensue in front of them all. The fans and the staff had created a barricade as they fought against each other, preventing the rest of the people from passing. Agitated, Chan craned his neck and looked around for some sort of opening. Spotting one near the side, Chan signalled to his members to head towards the small gap; he watched to make sure they safely got through the throngs of people before looking towards Y/N.
He immediately registered the flicker of overwhelmingness in her eyes. Ensuring Y/N's safety was at the forefront of Chan's mind, and deciding he'd deal with any potential repercussions later, Chan placed the palm of his hand on the small of Y/N's back and pushed her forward, guiding her through the crowd and to the safety of the enclosed security measures.
āOkay?ā Y/N heard Chan whisper to the back of her head once they had approached a quieter area.
Y/N nodded once. She smiled behind her mask when she felt the tips of Chan's fingers discreetly brush against hers in acknowledgement.
āDid you get hurt?ā Chan continued to murmur.
Reaching her fingers up to her face, Y/N mildly winced when the skin of her cheekbone seemed to protest.
āI'll be fine,ā Y/N hummed. āJust a bruise.ā
Y/N suddenly laughed under her breath when he didn't reply. āAre you clenching your jaw?ā
Chan snorted. āHow did you know? You're not even looking at me.ā
āI know you,ā Y/N grinned as she adjusted the mask on her face. āYou think you're so cool ā¦ Mr Jaw Clencher.ā
Chan looked down to hide the immediate crumple of his face as a large grin overtook him. āJust wait until we get onto the plane.ā
He then sighed, rubbing his face with his hands in perplexity. āI miss the bodyguards in the US.ā
Y/N resisted the urge to burst into laughter. āYou mean the ones you're best friends with?ā
Chan smiled again. āYeah. I mean ā¦ I get that these bodyguards are doing their best and I respect them for that because it isn't easy ā¦ but sometimes ā¦ ā
āSometimes you miss the big guys?ā Y/N prompted.
āSometimes I miss the big guys,ā Chan sighed.
A moment later, Changbin turned around from in front of them both. Without a word, he rolled up the short sleeve of his t-shirt and flexed the bulge of his biceps before turning around again; Y/N did her best to hide the laughter that threatened to spill out of her just as Chan erupted into a fit of giggles at his friend's contribution to their conversation.
āBin, you should be a bodyguard,ā Chan called out to Changbin.
Hyunjin turned around at that and stared. He removed an ear bud and blinked at both Chan and Changbin.
āChangbin would get dragged,ā Hyunjin said simply before returning to his previous state.
Changbin exploded in a fit of outrage.
Chan and Y/N smiled secretly together as they moved forward in the line.
*ā*ā*
āMy poor baby ā¦ ā
Chan's face was one of pure sympathy and hurt as he gently dabbed at the top of Y/N's cheek with a damp face cloth. They were both seated beside each other on the plane, and the first thing Chan had insisted on doing was examining the woman's face with his worried gaze.
The earlier collision had resulted in more than just a bruise; a small but deep cut was nestled into the slowly purpling area, and Chan was humming with soft sounds as he unscrewed a small red tube of ointment.
āAnd this is why I always carry this around,ā Chan grinned as he tenderly dabbed the thick ointment onto Y/N's cheek. āIt's good for everything. Dry skin, cuts, bruises, irritation ā¦ ā
Y/N was beginning to zone out. Sitting this close to Chan, Y/N's eyes grew soft as she stared into his. She could barely feel the pain as his fingers traced over her skin, instead focusing on the way her heart was beating with adoration for the man in front of her.
She might have been injured, but she didn't really care. She'd have gone back and experienced the chaos from earlier another ten times; being with Chan seemed to act as a buffer, his presence protecting her in itself. He really did care for her more than he let on, and Y/N felt herself fall a little deeper for him as he continued to smooth the ointment into her skin.
Chan grew quiet. He smiled shyly. āWhat ā¦ ? Why are you looking at me like that?ā
Y/N smiled. She leaned forward and pressed her forehead up against his. āYou're the best man in the whole entire world.ā
She watched in joy as the man's skin began to transform from the colour of golden sand to the burnt hues of the setting sun. His nose and ears glowed darker than the rest of him, and Y/N giggled quietly at how adorable he suddenly looked.
āI am not,ā Chan stammered. āYou got hurt because of me. I'm the worst man in the whole entire world.ā
Y/N shook her head. āIf you weren't there, I can guarantee I'd probably have ended up much worse. I was sure I was about to smash my face on the floor.ā
Chan wrinkled his nose. āBut you didn't.ā
āYeah, because you always look out for me,ā Y/N smiled happily. āAnd you look out for the kids. You're always looking out for everyone.ā
Chan was about to reply when their large seats suddenly shook; bewildered, Chan and Y/N turned around to see Seungmin scowling at the both of them.
āShut up,ā Seungmin drawled. āYou're making me sick. Either move seats or shut. Up.ā
Face breaking into a smile, Chan reached over and pinched his friend's face. Seungmin's mouth fell open in shock and Chan burst into laughter before sitting back down properly in his seat again.
He slipped his fingers into Y/N's hand before pulling her into his side. He rubbed the side of her arm as he reclined into the back of his seat with a sigh of comfort, and he dropped a soft kiss onto the top of Y/N's head as she leaned her head against the curve of his chest.
āDo you think our undercover mission was successful?ā Chan hummed.
Y/N reached for her phone. She opened her social media and scrolled through her friendsā trending hashtag.
She held her phone out in front of Chan's face with a smile.
āMission success,ā Y/N smiled. āThere isn't one sceptical post in sight. I guess the bruise was worth it.ā
Chuckling at that, Chan took Y/N's phone and slipped it into his pocket. He then squeezed his arms around her in a tighter hug, suddenly very, very happy that he was finally taking her with him.
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Tag list ~ @koos-euphoria @raethethey @hotmesshapa @manonblackbeak-trash @hendsernoodle @stanskzseungmin @ateez-babygirl @dalamjisung @dinosdawn @cookiemonstermusic258 @strwbrryfroyo @gazelle-des-pres @qtieskz @stigmvta @necromancersupreme @super-btstrash-posts @changlix-mp4 @exonations @changboobies @jeyelleohe @rae-blogging @planetdemon @dani41 @jumbocircus @octalalica @velvetand-roses @foivetimesacharm @waverzzzzzzzz @peachy-flxwr @elizabeth11moreno @lenfilms @xhazmania @starshine-moon @snow-pegasus @bbychannie97 @laylasbunbunny @americanokisses @bluechans @bellamuerte1987 @meowmeowisdaname @chanssmiles @minunivers @septicrebel @bangchans-angel @spacegirlstuff @stayconnecteed @linogatinho @smutdumpskz @yeonjunarchives-posts @dprkbyn (let me know if you wanna be added or removed)
Y/N was wide awake when she felt the foot of the bed dip. She had just enough time to set her phone aside before her husband jumped on top of her, his laughter flowing through their air and mingling with hers. The man overestimated the amount of space between his face and his wife's; his forehead collided with Y/N's chin, and the woman yelped in pain just as Chan gasped at the dizziness that suddenly overcame him.
āOw ā¦ ā Y/N moaned as she grabbed her jaw. She started to laugh as Chan sat up again, his legs on either side of hers. He was rubbing at his forehead with a tinge of annoyance aimed at himself, though his smile was large and clear on his plump mouth.
āThat hurt,ā Chan giggled. āAre you okay baby?ā
āSure,ā Y/N wheezed. āI mean, my teeth are definitely on the verge of falling out ā¦ but apart from that, I'm completely fine.ā
Contagious giggles erupting out of him again like sparkling bubbles, Chan leaned forward and cupped Y/N's face in the warmth of his hands. His lips pressed feather-like kisses along Y/N's jaw and chin; dramatic āmwahā sounds left Chan's mouth with each kiss, and soon Y/N was a giggling pile of butterflies, melting into their bedsheets.
āPoor baby,ā Chan murmured against the curve of Y/N's cheekbone. āCan't escape her husband's big forehead.ā
āYour forehead isn't even big,ā Y/N's voice was muffled as Chan hovered over her with his twinkling eyes. āYou're lucky your head doesn't physically show how enormous your brain is.ā
Chan grinned. From this angle, the man looked as though shooting stars were falling from his eyes, the bedroom lights enhancing the deep brown of them and causing them to dazzle like the night sky on the other side of their curtains. Chan couldn't keep the smile off of his face as he looked down at his wife, and when he slipped the tips of his fingers into her hair that spilled over the pillow, Y/N had no other choice but to wrap her arms around his shoulders and bring him down on top of her.
āYou're so beautiful,ā Y/N hummed against Chan's lips. His smile widened as he leaned into the kiss: his mouth was like a stretch of soft silk as it glided over his wife's skin.
Y/N smiled. He must have been using the lip balm she gave him more frequently than she thought.
āNot as beautiful as you,ā Chan whispered. His elbows were pinned to the bed as he used his fingers to caress the flushed skin of Y/N's face, and Y/N noticed the faint tremble in his soft touch with a pang of affection. There was so much pent up emotion directed towards her in just the touch of his fingertips alone that Y/N felt her heart thud heavily against her ribcage. It was like it was trying to escape; almost as if it could burst through her skin and sink itself into her husband's body, merging with his heart.
āWhat are you thinking about?ā Chan murmured as he continued to smooth the backs of his fingers over his wife's temples.
Y/N trailed her hands down Chan's shoulders. She settled them at the small of his back as he leaned further into her, his legs sandwiching the bedsheets in-between them both.
āI don't know,ā Y/N hummed slowly. She searched her husband's eyes in wonder. āI don't know how to put it into words.ā
āWoah,ā Chan started to chuckle. āDeep thoughts, huh?ā
Y/N grinned. She sat up a little further and rested her back against her propped up pillow, and once she was upright, she held her arms out for her husband again. Chan happily sank into her embrace and Y/N started to laugh when he rubbed his head against her collarbone; his hair soon turned into a cloud of frizz, and Y/N smoothed it down with her fingers with a wide grin.
āHow was your day?ā Y/N asked him.
Chan immediately sat up on his wife's legs as his eyes filled with excitement. āI got some new equipment!ā
Y/N's face softened as she listened to her husband recall the events of his day. Chan's eyes were wide with joy and his words spilled out of him in an endearing tangle with how fast he was speaking. The further he got into explaining how his new equipment worked, the more Chan waved his hands around in an animated manner.
As she watched him, Y/N's smile deepened. She didn't understand how a lot of what his husband enjoyed worked; but it was something Chan was incredibly passionate about, and he was so happy when talking about it that Y/N could listen to him talking about the topic all day. He was also more than happy to explain the ins and outs of his complicated system to his wife as many times as she wanted him to, his excitement increasing each time.
Chan could make the most boring of topics seem interesting. He immersed himself so much into the way he explained things, and to Y/N, it was the most adorable thing in the whole entire world.
Chan suddenly stopped talking once he caught the dazed look on his wife's face. He dropped his hands as the stretch of skin from his neck to his hairline turned the colour of cherries.
āWhat?ā Chan asked quietly. He started to laugh, his hair falling into his eyes. āWhy are you looking at me like that?ā
Y/N smiled. āNothing. Keep talking.ā
āI've finished,ā Chan laughed. He leaned forward and sandwiched his wife in a bear hug again, his lips curving against the side of her neck into a happy smile. āHow was your day?ā
āBoring,ā Y/N giggled.
Chan lifted his head and looked into Y/N's face. āTell me anyway? I wanna know all about your boring day.ā
Slipping her hands into Chan's hair again, Y/N pushed the unruly strands away from his forehead. She began to speak, recalling the details from her day; even though she really had nothing spectacular to say, Chan's eyes were full of interest as he listened to her, his attention focused on her every word with love hearts pulsing in the centre of his pupils.
āI love you,ā Chan suddenly said once she had stopped speaking. āLike ā¦ I really love you. I like you. I like everything about you. You're just so ā¦ ā
Chan's voice trailed off into a tiny squeak and he darted his hands out; he looked as though he was about to squish his wife's face in a fit of cute aggression, but he stopped, curling his delicate fingers into fists instead before retracting his hands slightly.
āAh ā¦ ā Chan then moved his hands again, stopping when his fingers hovered over Y/N's head. His face broke into a wide smile as he gently placed his palm over the side of her head, and he used his fingers to caress her hair with his feather-like touch.
Y/N couldn't help but flush profusely at the gesture. She sank into her pillow as Chan leaned a little closer to her, his hand continuing to gently pat her head as though she was some sort of small animal.
āMy baby,ā Chan hummed as he moved his fingers to her face. His fingertips kissed the curve of her cheekbone before he slid his hands to her waist; before Y/N had time to react, he had pulled her down and Chan had rolled over onto his side opposite her. He burst into amused laughter at the sight of Y/N's taken aback expression, and it only made him wrap his arms around her waist tighter, his legs hooking themselves around hers a little closer.
āI really like you too, for the record,ā Y/N whispered once their noses were brushing against each other in their proximity. A little dazed at the closeness and the sweet scent her husband was radiating, Y/N slowly traced her fingers over Chan's jaw, marvelling at the raw beauty in front of her. āI like everything about you. I even like the things that I don't like about you.ā
Chan started to chuckle. He shut his eyes in satisfaction as he moved his face even closer to hers; their foreheads bumped again, this time softer than before. But it made them erupt into hushed giggles all the same, and in the space between them, Chan reached for Y/N's hand and closed his fingers around them.
āChris?ā Y/N whispered.
Chan hummed against the curve of her lips.
āIf I've ever hurt you. Like ā¦ ever. I'm really, really sorry,ā Y/N breathed. Her voice trembled as she realised there was a possibility that she could have hurt the man she adored more than anything in the whole entire universe; whether she meant it or not, she was sure there must have been at least one occurrence in the past where she might have said something hurtful without realising it. Looking at Chan's softened features in the dark, Y/N's eyes filled with tears and she leaned forward to kiss his nose. āI really love you. With my whole entire heart and soul.ā
Chan opened his eyes slowly. They locked onto hers and he smiled softly, the plumpness of his lips glistening in the shadows. āYou're incapable of hurting me, baby. And if you ever have ā¦ Well, I'm sure I deserved it.ā
Y/N couldn't help but splutter with laughter. She squeezed Chan's hand, smiling when he squeezed her fingers back.
Chan grinned then, nuzzling his nose against hers. āI really can't remember a time where I ever felt hurt by you. Besides, I'm sure I've probably hurt you without knowing it ā¦ maybe more than once. So I'm sorry too.ā
Y/N should her head. āI can't remember either.ā
āGood,ā Chan chuckled. He then winked at her. āLook at us. We're literally the perfect couple.ā
āYou're not wrong,ā Y/N giggled against Chan's lips.
Chan smiled. He scooped her further into him; their bodies were pressed flat against one another, almost as if they were trying to merge together and become one. āI can't believe I'm going to say this again in one night, but ā¦ gosh, baby, I really do love you.ā
Y/N burst into another fit of quiet laughter. āWhat's gotten into you? You usually find it so hard to say that.ā
Chan shrugged. He kissed her forehead. āI'm probably half asleep. Or ā¦ you just make it easy to say.ā
Y/N dropped her head against Chan's shoulder. She squeezed his torso and breathed in the homely scent of his skin as he continued to tuck himself around her like a moldable blanket.
āI really love you,ā Y/N hummed into Chan's collarbone with a kiss.
Liked this fic? Support me by leaving me a tip! :] and also reblog, it motivates me to write more ~
Tag list ~ @koos-euphoria @raethethey @hotmesshapa @manonblackbeak-trash @hendsernoodle @stanskzseungmin @ateez-babygirl @dalamjisung @dinosdawn @cookiemonstermusic258 @strwbrryfroyo @gazelle-des-pres @qtieskz @stigmvta @necromancersupreme @super-btstrash-posts @changlix-mp4 @exonations @changboobies @jeyelleohe @rae-blogging @planetdemon @dani41 @jumbocircus @octalalica @velvetand-roses @foivetimesacharm @waverzzzzzzzz @peachy-flxwr @elizabeth11moreno @lenfilms @xhazmania @starshine-moon @snow-pegasus @bbychannie97 @laylasbunbunny @americanokisses @bluechans @bellamuerte1987 @meowmeowisdaname @chanssmiles @minunivers @septicrebel @bangchans-angel @spacegirlstuff @stayconnecteed @linogatinho @smutdumpskz @yeonjunarchives-posts @dprkbyn (let me know if you wanna be added or removed)
Pairing : Boyfriend!Bangchan x F!Reader
TW : slight angst ; short but sweet and fluffy at the end ;
Word Count : 1.3k
Request : @kurolils : I just want something really really angsty w chan. so just maybe like, he's supper stressed and snaps at the reader and yk something very angsty, but obviously with a fluffy ending
A/N : THIS TOOK FOREVER TO GET TO AND I'M SORRY FOR MAKING YOU WAIT BUT I"M WRITING IT NOW!!! HIHIHI!!!
Preparing for a world tour, as exciting as it seems, was probably just as stressful, if not more stressful than working on an album, at least for Chan it was. He had to work on remembering all of the dances for the entire setlist, he had to think of what heād say to all the STAYS, he had to remember all the lyrics to all the songs. There was so much to do, and it felt like there wasnāt enough time to get it all done.Ā
The date of his departure for the first international part of the tour was quickly closing in, and of course, management was still against you going with him considering the news hadnāt broken yet that the two of you were dating. That was the hardest part of leaving for tours. He was leaving you behind, and while you were an absolute champ about it on the surface, he could read right through you and tell that you were upset.Ā
Thatās why he tried to spend as much time with you as possible before he had to leave, thatās what he usually did. He wasnāt sure why things felt more stressful than usual this time around, he wasnāt sure why it felt like the clock was working against him this entire time. All he did know was that there was so much to get done, and he didnāt need any distractions, he didnāt need anyone getting in his way.Ā
āStill working, huh?ā You said from the doorway, your hands shoved into the pockets of one of Chans oversized hoodies. He hummed in response, his eyes not even glancing up from the laptop screen as he sat at his desk. His headphones were on, but at least he had one ear uncovered so he could hear you. āI know you have to leave in a couple daysā¦ I was just wondering if you wanted to watch a movie with me or something? I really miss you already andā¦ Just wanted to spend some time with you-āĀ
āShut up.ā Chan mumbled, and your lips quickly pulled into a thin line, your eyes dropping to the ground, both embarrassed and upset from those two simple words. āAs if I donāt have enough on my plate, now Iām expected to stop everything Iām doing to coddle you because youāre going to miss me. I meanā¦ good god, Y/N, grow up. Iām not always going to be here, get used to watching movies by yourself. Damn.ā He huffed before adjusting his headphones so that both ears were covered.Ā
You didnāt even know what to say, you didnāt have anything to say anyway, you were trying not to cry, so you kept your head low and turned around, shutting the door behind you as you made your way to the couch. Itās not like you hadnāt seen Chan stressed before, itās just that most of the time you were the one that would get him out of his funk. Now it seemed like you were the one stressing him out even more.Ā
The rest of the day went by without any sort of interaction between the two of you. Heād leave the room to go to the bathroom or grab something to eat or drink, and then heād quickly retreat back to his desk. You spent the evening sitting on the couch watching movies by yourself and scrolling through your phone to try to keep your mind off of what had happened.Ā
You had made dinner, and not even the smell of a home-cooked meal had pulled him out from the bedroom, so you made enough for yourself before saving the leftovers in the fridge and eating all alone at the table. You made sure to clean it all before heading to the bathroom and washing up before going to bed. You thought that maybe at some point he would come out and apologize or something, but he didnāt. If it werenāt for the sound of keyboard typing and his mouse clicking rapidly it would feel like he wasnāt there at all.Ā
The bed didnāt feel as empty as most people would assume it would feel, but thatās only because Chan rarely joined you in bed before you dozed off. The only difference is that this time you wondered if heād join you at all. Would you feel the bed shift with his weight as he finally got under the covers at the crack of dawn or would he opt to sleep on the couch instead?Ā
Your mind was full of thoughts, some good, some bad, most of them were bad though, and these were the thoughts that filled your subconscious, the thoughts that fueled your dreams tonight. He was getting tired of you. He thought you were annoying. You were a burden to him. All of these negative emotions played out in the most realistic scenarios in your dreams, and they felt so real in fact, that when you woke up, you couldnāt stop yourself from crying. The emotions were overwhelming, that feeling of being unwanted by the only person you wanted was devastating.Ā
You didnāt know how late it was or how early it was, and you had been sleeping so deeply that you hadnāt even felt Chan come into the room and get into the bed. āBaby, whatās wrong?ā He whispered, having not even fallen asleep yet when you jumped up. Your sniffles were quiet, but in the silence of the room they sounded so loud.Ā
āYou donāt love me anymoreā¦ā Your whisper was choked out, and the sob that followed was heartbreaking for him to hear. He knew that he had been quite harsh and honestly, rather heartless when he had spoken to you earlier. Thatās why he had kept his distance for the remainder of the day. He thought that that was what youād needed, but he had been horribly wrong. āIāmā¦ Iām annoyingā¦ and distractingā¦āĀ
āShhā¦ baby, noā¦ā Chan cooed, sitting up in the bed beside you and wrapping his arm around you to pull you against his side. āI didnāt mean what I said earlier, I was just stressedā¦ Iāve got so much to do andā¦ I shouldnāt take that out on you. Itās not your fault.ā He used his other hand to turn on the lamp on the nightstand, and when he did he could see the tears flowing freely down your cheeks. āIām an asshole, arenāt I?āĀ
You weakly nodded your head before resting it against his shoulder. āI donāt like watching movies by myself. Thatās our thingā¦ It was really lonely without you.ā You mumbled, fiddling with the tag that hung off the blanket. āAm I too clingy? Do you want me to leave you alone?ā You asked, and your body tensed up just enough for him to notice. You didnāt want to hear the answer, you were scared of it.Ā
āOf course not! You cling to me just the right amount.ā He joked, and he couldnāt help but chuckle when you looked up at him with unamused eyes and a slight pout on your lips. āI love that you always want me around, it makes me feel loved. I donāt ever want you to leave me alone, because I donāt like watching movies by myself either. Iām not mad at you, I never was, and I never could be. So letās get some sleep, Iāll have Changbin and Ji handle the rest of the setlist for the tour, and we can have a date day, the whole day tomorrow. You get my undivided attention. You deserve it.ā His finger slid under your chin to tilt your head up, pressing his lips to yours, just long enough to have you melting against him and your mind clearing of any and every thought. āAnd just so you knowā¦ I already miss you tooā¦ And I miss you way more.ā
thereās not really a day that goes by without me thinking about chan in loveā¦
Chan, who gives the best hugs, his arms winding around your shoulders to pull you close into his warm, solid chest. Chan, who has a hard time letting go of you when you feel so perfect in his arms; whose heart is beating like crazy every time he does it, but who doesn't seem to know what's good for him because he still always finds excuses to touch you.
Chan, whose favourite thing about you has always been how you continue to surprise him ā in the simple ways, yes, when you offer to pick him up from a schedule and show up with his favourite gimbap and convenience store coffee combo, but also in the way that you are. Because every time he thinks heāll know what youāll do, what youāll say, youāll like, youāll do something entirely new. He invites you out to dinner, and you show up with a bag full of vinyl because you just got into it (and you bought one for him, a cool-looking one that matches his room to display on his walls because he canāt play it. He wonders how you always think of everything). He takes you to an industry event, and you end up charming a guy heās been wanting to talk to for ages. A fan from Europe comes up to you, and it turns out you speak their language. Most days, heās so in awe of you it makes him stutter when he asks you the simplest questions.
Chan, who never has to ask for your attention. He canāt think about it for too long, lest he lets himself get carried away, but you always seem to have an eye on him, able to pick up on his moods so effortlessly. You can take one look at him across a crowded room and within seconds, youāre next to him, your arm looping through his, your solid warmth easing the burn of annoyance in his chest. Heās asked you about it once, and youād said it wasnāt a big deal because it was part of loving someone. Youād turned back to your sushi, as if you hadnāt just made his lovesick heart beat out of his chest.
Chan, who asks himself how youāre always so strong.
Chan, who thinks you donāt need him at all.
Chan, whoās fiercely protective of you, nonetheless; who always makes sure your seatbelt is fastened, who will gently shift you to his other side if youāre walking on the street side of the sidewalk, who will not let you take public transport after dark, coming to pick you up himself or paying for your Uber if he canāt.
Chan, who resigns himself to loving you for the rest of his life without telling you; who told Changbin that he would probably still attend your wedding, even if you got married to someone else. Changbin had looked at him like he lost his goddamn mind. Chan thinks he has, the day he met you.
Chan, who lies awake at night, trying and failing not to think about it, about you, about whether your smile to him today meant anything, or if he was being delusional about you bringing him gifts meaning something because today you brought Han a coffee because Chan told you he was tired. Chan, who, when heās not overthinking every single one of your interactions (ālike a lovesick teenagerā he reproves himself), can spend hours daydreaming about what it would be like to be yours, to be loved by you. His favourite daydreams are the simple, domestic ones; coming home to you every night, pressing a kiss into your hair, breathing in your shampoo as he falls asleep with his face buried in your soft skin.
Chan, who doesnāt believe in signs from the universe; but when you get surprised by a rainstorm on the way back from an impromptu dinner, and he stretches his jacket over the two of you as you run to take refuge under a small awning like youāre in a romance movie; when youāre standing there, laughing up at him, soaking wet, beautiful, radiant, standing way too close to him ā he takes the hint and kisses you, and kisses you like he means it, too, unable to squander his one chance to know what loving you tastes like.
Chan, who doesnāt expect you to kiss him back; so when you do, pulling him closer against your sweet, soft body with a hunger that mirrors his, itās like his heart cracks open, his love, his need for you leaking into every fibre of his being, and before you know it, youāre filthily making out in the doorway of a random apartment complex.
Chan, who wants to do it all right. Who takes you to Australia, to meet his family, who brings wine and flowers when he meets your parents, who buys you red roses and takes you out to dinner until you giggle and tell him he doesnāt need to do all that, that youāre happy just to be with him.
Chan, who loves taking you on tour whenever he can, if just for a couple days; because he misses you, yes, but also because his life only feels right when he can share every part of it with you.
Chan, who also loves taking you on trips. Japan in the spring, Europe in the summerĀ ā and wood mountain cabins in the winter. Chan, who one year, during one of those winter holidays, makes love to you in front of the fireplace and proposes right there, just you and him and the crackle of the firewood and the snow outside the window. Just you and him, forever.
Warnings: Fluff, overwhelming, slightly suggestive if you squint really hard, established relationship.
Winter days are something that Chan loves, especially when he gets to spend them with you, cuddling and drinking hot chocolate while watching a movie.
It's the coldest day of the year and you're definitely glad that your huge bed feels warm as you're tightly held by Chan. You slightly frown in your sleep when you snuggle more and don't feel him next to you. You open your eyes and see a note next to a rose
"Good morning, babygirl
I had to go to practice today and forgot to tell you last night. Okay, I didn't forget, I just couldn't cause we were having so much fun and you were happy for spending the whole Christmas day together. I didn't want to wake you up cause you looked too adorable. I'm sorry. I promise I'll make it feel like I'm here.
Lots of kisses. I love you ā”"
Guilt arises as you realize you slept till 11 a.m but if you wouldāve known he's gonna be busy the whole day you wouldn't have slept this much. You gently take the rose and bury your nose in it. Your detective brain tells you that the rose looks a bit too fresh, it's like he left it not long ago.
The covers on your bed almost fly when you quickly get up and run to the door in hopes that maybe he didnāt leave the building yet and you can still get your good morning kiss. You open the door and look down the stairs before pouting at the lack of Chan's presence.
"This is why I love you. You ran to find me after you looked closer at the rose, isn't it? The lady from the flower shop told me to put sugar in the water to keep it fresh. See, you're not the only one that likes sugar that much. Is that the secret of your beauty?
Now go, it's cold and I know you forgot your slippers...again." you take the sticky note off the door and as you look down at your feet, you shake your head, amused by how well he knows you.
As soon as you get back to the bedroom and your feet touch the fluffy slippers, you smile contentedly and understand why he always asks you to wear them around the house. It would be perfect if something wouldn't be bothering you in one of the slippers. "Oh God, please don't tell me it's a bug..." you clench your jaw with a disgusted face at the thought of squishing a bug. When you take the slipper off, there's another note and you let out a puffy breath in relief.
"Another reason I love you is that you always forget to put on your slippers and I have to remind you. Also, now you can proudly say that you stepped on me. But if you somehow decide to tell that to the boys just know that I will admit nothing.
Enjoy your coffee, sweetheart <3
P.S. I actually thought of putting ketchup in one of the slippers so that I can annoy you and make you laugh at the same time.
P.P.S. Matter of fact, I changed my mind about the stepping thing cause now you'll definitely tell the boys. This message will destroy itself in 3...2...1...poof! It would've been fun if the note would've actually poofed haha
P.P.P.S Maaan, there's a lot of pp's in this note (pun intended)
Aaand theeere you go, there's my favorite laugh. That's another reason I love you."
He loves you too damn much not to know that you started giggling and then went full on snorting when you read the end of the note. Still giggling and with his notes and the rose tightly held at your chest, you drag your feet to the kitchen to make your coffee and put the rose in a vase. You can almost feel him, backhugging you as you both waddle to the kitchen, his lips glued to your shoulder and his arms wrapped around your waist. His warmth engulfs you as you reach the kitchen and you're taken aback by the smell.
"Hi, you sneaky baby! Did you miss me?
I knew you're gonna try the pancakes first.
Before you're wondering...no, a ghost didn't come and brew your coffee. It was the coffee maker. I helped though. I pressed the timer button *full-toothed grin*
Enjoy the pancakes and the coffee, my love.
Will be finishing practice late today so I hope that I at least made you smile. I'll be covering you in kisses to make up for not telling you about the practice.
I love you to the moon and back.
"Mhm, tHaT's NoT vErY mUcH" I KNOW THE MOON IS ONLY 3 DAYS FAR, OKAY? Just pretend it's something you can never reach cause you know my love for you is immeasurable."
You zone out, taking a bite from a pancake and lean on the counter. Memories of you and him in the same kitchen flood your thoughts as you remember your banter over how far is the moon and that "to the moon and back...twice" is only 14 or 15 days.
"You don't even love me for a whole month" you pout and roll your eyes at his amused expression.
"Baaaby, come ooon, you know I love you to infinity and beyond." he chuckles as you raise your eyebrows at him while propping your hands on your waist.
"That's cheating, babe. You know how much I love Toy Story. You know, you kinda resemble Woody..." the corners of your lips give away the fact that you're trying to stop a laugh.
"Huhh!! You did not!! Come here you!!" he grabs your waist and tickles you until you both slip and fall on the fluffy rug in the kitchen.
"I love you, y/n." he speaks in a hushed voice as he kisses your forehead.
"I know." you mumble with your face hidden at his chest.
"Yah!! Say it back." he frowns playfully before gently cupping your chin.
"It back."
"Yoooou devil!! You're gonna get it one day."
"Is it gonna be the first time or the second time you return from the Moon? Cause daaamn, Woody The Astronaut surely sounds hot af" you tease and burst into laughter when he tries to stop you from talking with small kisses. Small kisses turn into big ones and you soon find yourself picked up over his shoulder, Chan playfully slapping your ass on the way to the bedroom.
"Woody's gonna make you ascend, baby. Buckle up!"
Your daydream is stopped by the smell of coffee as it invades your nostrils and invites you take a sip. You'd finish all the pancakes if it wasn't for your heart to tell you to leave him one like you always do, even if you know it's gonna get cold. Even now when you know he's gonna be home really late, you cover the plate and return to your coffee, taking small sips and humming with every delicious sip. For some reason coffee tastes better when Chan is involved in the process.
Savouring the coffee in blissful silence, another note catches your attention from behind the sheer curtains of the kitchen's big windows.
"Boo!
Pretend you got scared. *frowny face*
Please make sure to dress warmly if you go out, okay?
My credit card is in my nightstand's drawer and the pin is your birth month and day. Yes, cheesy, I know. Bite me!
Ouch!! That was mean. Now do it again.
Have fun today, my little vampire,
Yours. Only yours."
You can't say you're not giggling and feeling tremendously in love with this man but at the same time you can't help but think of the fact that he woke up early to prepare this for you. "Mr. Bang Christopher Chan, you must be insane if you think that I'll ever use your credit card on buying something for myself. You spoil me too much already." you say to the camera in the hallway, scolding him so he'll be able to see it later. When you realize there's cameras around the house, you almost cave into the temptation of seeing where else he left notes but...where is the fun if you already know. It's like a scavenger hunt without the map and the bathroom might be the next x on the invisible map.
When you slide the shower door to turn the water on, you burst into laughter. A note glued to a pic of him is taped on the shower head and you find yourself asking the exact same thing as his first line in the note.
"Hey, how you doin'? *smirks* Umm...your tits look heavy.... Shall I hold them?
I know you nodded. *horny jail*
Think of my hands on you. Please. *gets himself into the horny jail too*
Enjoy your shower, babygirl.
Fuck!
Nevermind. I'm hard. Goddamn it. *sighs*"
You know giggles wouldn't be what would echo in the bathroom if he'd be there with you. Happy with just a good laugh and maybe some naughty thoughts, you let the water drip on you as your mind gets hazy thinking about the last time you showered together.
"Love, umm...what would you say if I smelled like flowers today?" Chan yells from the bathroom.
You open the bathroom door to see him holding his empty shower gel bottle in one hand and your flowery shower gel in his other hand.
"I-...I think you'd smell like a princess, baby." you respond, your face contorted into a smug expression.
"You're lucky I love you. And stop looking at me with that smirk." he chuckles as he's now aware that you've leaned onto the shower's doorframe and you're scanning him up and down through the steamed glass.
"Can't help it. You're too hot, baby... not my fault."
He slides the door and grabs your wrist, pulling you in as you try to speak through laughter "baaby, now my pj's are all wet"
He hums, letting the strap of your satin shirt slip off your shoulder "Better reason for me to remove them."
Your eyes close and goosebumps appear even when the water is warm. He has this effect on you. It happens everytime you think about his hands on you while showering. Everytime you think about his lips on your skin. Everytime you remember how your fingers tangle in his wet curls when he gets on one knee and puts your leg on his shoulder. He always looks up to you to see his work of art. To see how your mouth opens and your breath hitches in your throat because of him. And when your eyes roll to the back of your head and your fingers grab harder at his roots, he knows he's done a good job and damn he can be cocky about it. He's entitled to being cocky in your opinion. The first night you spent in his bed, you could swear you saw stars. The smirk on his face is something that you'll remember forever when it grew even cockier with every orgasm he pulled from you that night.
The phone clings and continues 3, 4, 5 times one after another and gets you off your haze, making you roll your eyes and tsk as you slide the door to see who dares to disturb your thoughts. Now you could absolutely not be annoyed with Chan as you read his texts
"I want a camera in the bathroom, pointed to the shower. If you're not showering yet, I hope you think of me.
If you did already, was I good in your imagination? Why do I keep doing this to myself??!! FUCK!
Aaanyway...I wanted to see if you wanna come see us practice... around 8 p.m? And after, we can go eat something with the boys if you want to. Btw, Hannie and Lixie told me to say they miss you.
I miss you too. The guy in my pants misses you too."
With a mischievous smile on your face you quickly type in your reply and get back to finish your shower.
"You're always amazing, baby. You know it. Your lips and fingers were highly missed. Still are. And umm... d'ooh!! Of course I wanna see you practice. I'll be there around 8, love. I miss the guys too, especially those 2 crackheads. Thank you for the pancakes and the coffee and the notes. I miss you more, you horny baby. *kisses the guy in the pants*"
His answer comes almost too fast, a sign that he was waiting for your reply "Baaaby, you're gonna kill me... Will gladly wait for you, sweetie. HUH! YOU PERVERT!"
~~~~~~ time lapse ~~~~~~
It's something magical when it snows and the hand warmers you have in your pockets or the long padded jacket couldn't even compare with the warmth you feel when your fingers are intertwined with Chan's in the pocket of his jacket. Or when he stops you from shaking the snowflakes off your jacket because you outshine them anyway. Or when he suddenly turns to face you and kisses your rosy nose "winter is warmer when I'm with you" he says and playfully rubs his nose on yours.
He always finds ways to bring a smile on your face. Even now when you're alone, a message in the window of your favorite purses store is making you smile "Hi, y/n. Yes, you, love. Go inside. I left something for you here. Mr. Christopher."
"Maybe there's another Christopher that left something for a girl named exactly like me" you think to yourself as you read the message again. It looks like his writing but you don't want to look like a freaking lunatic by going inside and asking.
The sales lady knocks on the window and waves at you with the same bright smile on her face that she always has whenever she sees you. She mouths "Come in."
You can't believe your eyes when you see what he left for you in the store. You've been saving money so you can buy it when it's not from "the new collection" but right now it's way too expensive and he doesn't work this much for you to spend his money on a freakin tote. You politely refuse to take it and leave the store, waving goodbye to the sales lady.
With him in your thoughts, you keep your chin up high and happily enter the stationery store. Loaded with shopping bags filled to the brim, you get out of it after half hour and call a taxi. It's been a long time since you've been thinking of doing something to show Chan how much you love him and today is the day. You gotta say the taxi driver did look weirdly at you when he saw the amount of shopping bags.
You might be finishing earlier than you thought with the amount of excitement you have when you get back home and start unpacking. "This goes here and this here, ehehe it's so pretty! Woah!" your giggles and your hands clapping with joy can probably be heard outside the apartment too but you couldn't care less. What you hope for is that he'll be happy too. He deserves everything and more.
It doesn't take long for you to feel cold since you've been sitting in the hallway for so long, eager to finish everything in time for you to go see the practice.
You stretch your legs that started to go numb from sitting in the same position and slowly get up. His hoodies being the first thing you think about when you're cold, you head straight to the dressing room. It's the same place where you often come when you miss him.
He surely knows how much time you spend there and how much you love wearing his hoodies because more of them keep showing up in his closet and they all smell like him. They smell like home.
You didn't expect to find another note taped to a hoodie but here you are, sitting on the floor in the dressing room with his hoodie on your lap as you read his words.
"I miss you too, sweetheart. I'm sorry for not being there to cuddle with you and keep you warm:(
I know things are difficult now and I feel like I've been missing a lot lately and the time we spend together isn't enough for the both of us but... please bare with me. Please...
I miss you so much... lately it's happening even when I'm with you because I know I'll be leaving you alone again. And for that, again, I'm sorry. I'll always come back to you, I promise."
You don't even know when you started crying until a tear rolls over your cheek and falls onto the note. The hoodie didn't even get to be worn by you cause you don't feel cold anymore. Chan's there to keep you warm even when he's gone. He's in your mind, in your heart and everywhere in the house.
~~~~~~ time lapse ~~~~~~
The security guard at the JYP building wishes you good luck and helps taking the bags to the practice room's door as you hold the drinks you bought. You couldn't go see the boys empty handed, that's why you stopped to their favorite place to get some drinks for them. You would've grabbed a bite too but Chan already said that you're gonna have dinner. You were so caught up with preparing this for him that you even forgot to eat.
You peek through the slightly opened door of the practice room and you're suddenly mesmerized because everyone looks charming and the room is full of balloons and flowers. They're all wearing suits but the one that stands out the most is Chan. Stupidly gorgeous would be an understatement if you were to describe him. When you open the door wider, they notice you and come running towards you to greet you. Except for Chan. He stays there, looking at you like he hasn't seen you this morning. Like everyone else disappeared and you're the only one he sees. He smiles lovingly, slowly blinking and nodding when you get surrounded by the other members that keep asking questions. "Hiiii!! Woah!! What's in here? Awww you brought us drinks?? I missed yoooou!! Is it cold outside? Why are you so pretty today? Still, what's with the bags? Are you kicking the old man out? Chan hyung, you're gonna sleep at the dorms tonight, ahahahaha!!"
"Yah!! She's my woman. Let her breathe." Chan finally has enough of their mockery and comes closer. The boys quickly scatter so he can hug you, it's definitely not because Chan glared at them.
"Hi, my love." his dimples make him even more gorgeous as he's now having a wide smile on his face while looking into your eyes.
If love isn't what you see in his eyes then you must not know what love is. It's this. It's his hand cupping your cheek and his thumb grazing on your lips as he leans forward to kiss you.
"Mmm...Hi, baby." you hum and smile after he breaks the kiss to look at you again.
It's like he's studying every little part of your face before he takes your hand and makes you do a pirouette to look at you up and down.
"How did I get so lucky to be loved by the most gorgeous woman?"
"I think the gorgeous woman is luckier. Wait. The gorgeous woman is me, right?"
"Yes, dumdum. Ahahaha." he laughs as you do a curtsy and flutter your eyelashes at him.
He points to the bags with a suspicious look on his face to which you chuckle and promise you'll show him after the practice cause by now your curiousity is at its peak.
He pecks your lips and makes you take a seat so they can continue the practice as the boys become hyped up. You shouldn't have brought them coffee at this hour cause their energy is now all over the room.
Chan takes the mic and starts singing a well known song and you get excited because you love the song. You can't help but tap your foot to the floor and rock yourself side to side as you see them dancing.
"It's a beautiful night
We're looking for something dumb to do...
Hey baby, I think I wanna marry you.
Is it the look in your eyes
Or is it... this dancing fools - he points to the members.
Who cares, baby, I know I wanna marry you."
The boys smile at you and retreat in dance steps, Jeongin dimming the lights in the room as he follows the others to the back of the practice room.
The twinkle of the song gets lower in volume and you now understand why Chan is the only one wearing a white suit. He takes his hand out of his pocket holding a tiny velvety box and gets on one knee in front of you, instantly making your eyesight foggy as tears fill your eyes.
"My forever, my love" his voice soft and stuttery as he takes your hand and kisses your knuckles. You can feel he's nervous by the way he's gently squeezing your hand and his thumb shakily brushes over your fingers.
"Even though I write lyrics and I'm proud of what I write, I will never be able to put in words what I feel for you and for us. I will never be able to show you how I love you and how much I love you, but I promise I will forever try.
I never knew...that you can fall in love just by looking at someone, until the day I saw you. Until I saw your smile. And if...if you'll let me, I promise that I will do whatever it takes to put a smile on your face every single day for the rest of our lives.
I nev-...never knew what love felt like until I found myself crying... while looking at a selfie you took of us when on tour-" he clears his throat as he closes his eyes and the tears he tried to hold back are now slowly falling on his cheeks.
"I- ugh, realized then that I want to see you on every tour. I want to see you every single day for the rest of my life. Does that make me obsessed? Maybe. Maybe I am. I'm obsessed with the way you open just one eye to see if I'm staring at you in the morning. I'm obsessed with the way you happily do your dancey dance when you eat something I cooked. I'm obsessed with how you slightly open your mouth when you apply mascara. I'm obsessed with how I can find hairs of yours in my clothes when I leave somewhere. I'm obsessed with the way you smell. With the way you move. With the way you kiss me. With the way your tiny hand fits perfectly in my hand. I'm obsessed with how I crave the sound of your voice even when you're around. I- it's... ugh, it's...
Because I love you. I love you for all the nights you stood there, falling asleep on videocalls just so you can hear me ramble about how the show was. I love you so much because you never took me for granted and I know you never will. I love you for still waiting for me for so many days after all this time. I love you... I love you because you never stopped caring, even when I probably deserved it for leaving you alone so many times."
You push the chair and get on your knees to hug him, shaking your head in disagreement of his last phrase. You'll never stop caring because he's your man. And he deserves all the happiness and love in the whole universe.
"Will you... let me love you for the rest of our lives? Will you mar-?" he giggles between tears when you cut him off, nodding and almost shouting your happiness.
"Yes, love!! Very much, yes!! Please!!" you lean into his touch when he wipes away your tears and presses his lips to yours. For minutes, you both stay there, lips glued to each other's and happy tears falling freely as you're both forgetting that there's others in the room. Even forgetting about the ring. Who needs a ring when you have a whole treasure. The most precious one. And he's hugging you like his life depends on it. As though your hearts found their forever home and locked the door. It feels as the whole world froze and the only ones able to move are you and him. Like his arm wrapped tightly around you and your fingers resting on his cheek are the peace your souls yearned for.
Both of you are remembered that you're not alone in the room when Jeongin clears his throat to muffle a squeaky sobb that even the others felt embarassed for.
"If I don't get proposed like this then I don't want it." Hyunjin says while wiping his tears.
"You're a man, hyung. You're gonna be the one that proposes." Seungmin rolls his eyes and tries to hide his emotions even though you can all see that he cried too.
"I don't care I'm a man. Someone propose to m-!" Hyunjin doesn't even finish his sentence when Binnie gets everyone out of his way, flirtatiously asking "Hyunjinie, will you marry me?"
You all start laughing, except for Hannie and Lixie that hug each other, almost yelling between tears "I wanna be married too!!"
Chan slides the ring on your finger and softly kisses your hand "Mrs. Bang...my lady" to which the boys shout "Yaaay congratulatiooons!!!" and clap their hands in excitement for their friends.
Since this was too overwhelming for everyone, you try to somehow make them forget about the bags. Although now it becomes kinda impossible with Chan bouncing on the balls of his feet and his eyes glued to the bags. Golden retriever energy are the appropiate words for his behaviour.
"May I please see what's in the bags, baby?" he pleads with sparkly eyes and his dimples appear as a bribe.
"You may, love. How can I resist those dimples?" you respond and softly bob your head in approval. Your heart holds a swarm of butterflies roaming around, each one of them declaring your love for Chan and getting ready to burst. You take a big breath of air and exhale, telling yourself that this is it. This is the moment. Go big or go home.
As he excitedly opens the first bag and turns it upside down to discard the contents, the floor around him fills with stars and suns. Big ones, small ones, colorful and gliterry ones.
You breathe softly on your mouth and your palms get sweaty when you see him falling on his knees, surrounded by the colored pieces of paper, his hands grazing all over them and scattering them around.
The second bag he opens is full of moons. Crescent moons, half moons, full moons, smiling ones and sleepy ones, in every shade and every size. You can see his hands slightly shaking as he gets emotional and gathers some of them closer to him, surrounding himself with the papers before moving to the last bag. He looks at you with tears brimming at his waterline not knowing what to say or do as you nod for him to open the last bag.
When he gets to the third bag and discards the contents, thousand of planets in every size and color fall on him and around, mixing with the other pieces on the floor until no space is left and they look like orbiting around him.
The others gasp when you quietly get on one knee and take out a ring and kiss it, your hand slightly shaking from the emotions that built up and increased with his proposal.
Chan lifts his gaze from the floor, his hands still holding a few pieces of papers. He bursts into tears and drops the papers when he covers his face, his shoulders twitching up and down as he mumbles between sobbs "I love you...so much..."
"I love you infinitely, my angel,
You're probably wondering why you're covered and surrounded by papers. Papers shaped like everything you mean to me. Because... you mean the Universe to me. My whole world, is you.
You're the home I could only ever dream about and I was given it... in exchange of a smile. A smile that you put on my face, and continued to do so every single day since the first one. And I will never be able to thank you enough for that. I will never be able to thank you for all the happiness you gave me and for all the love I received from you, a love that I didn't even know it exists."
You move closer to Chan to comfort him as his hands are shaking while resting on his knees. He looks at you with glossy eyes and a slight tremor in his bottom lip as he tries to stop his tears. With the ring tightly held, your hands find his and you bring them to your mouth, your lips pressing gently to his knuckles. The knot in your throat almost snaps, your voice becoming hushed and stuttery.
"You sometimes.. say I deserve better. No... my love, I already- already have the best there is.
Thank you for being mine. Thank you for wanting to be in my life. Thank you... for not giving up on us when it seemed too hard to continue. Thank you for having faith in me when I couldn't. Thank you for lifting me up and supporting me when you were the one that needed to be supported the most. Thank you...for- for being... there even when I didn't ask. For these reasons... and for a thousand more, I love you and forever will.
I love you for knowing me better than I know myself. I love you for all the nights you stayed there on the videocalls even after you thought I fell asleep, whispering "I'm sorry for not being there with you..."
You probably thought that I canāt hear you. I could love. For so many times I could hear your voice breaking when after minutes of watching me sleep, you ended the videocall with the same words "Please don't give up on us. I love you."
You always say that I'm the stronger one in this relationship, but it's all because of you. Because you're my strength, my pride, my happiness, my weakness, my lucky charm, my man... my all and everything.
I was a small human that got lucky enough to find a shelter into the warmests of the souls. Your soul. And I love you for never kicking me out.
I once said that you complete me and you asked "you think?" I still do, love and forever will.
Cause without you, my soul would still be lost, blindingly searching for yours. I'd be just y/n and not future Mrs. Bang.
I'm not gonna ask you to marry me cause that would be awkward after your proposal. You can't unmarry me now though, too late. - you softly chuckle between tears and he does the same - I will only ask you this:
Will you find me in your heart even at the toughest of times?"
He nods and cups your cheeks, gently wiping your tears as you both look into each other's eyes. From this moment on, you both know that this is your last life and you've finally found eternal peace after searching each other in every life. You feel it when you slide the ring on his finger before he intertwines his fingers with yours and brings it to his heart. His heartbeats mean forever. And nothing is gonna take that away from you, your heart tells you when it beats in sync with his.
The air around you is filled with "I love you"s spoken in hushed giggly voices between small kisses and sniffles. His hands calmy move upon your hips and travel along your outer thighs with delicate touches until he slowly moves you on his lap. He gently rocks you into a warm embrace and buries his face in the crook of your neck, whispering "My Mrs., my everything, I promise I will forever find you in my heart. Thank you for letting me stay in yours."
It might be cold outside but it's so warm and peaceful in his arms. He nuzzles closer at your neck and presses small kisses on your skin, taking in your scent as you both seem to not want this moment to end.
After minutes of both of you being lost in the moment, Chan chuckles when he hears whispers and lifts his head to see some of the boys on the floor shushing each other and some wiping their nose with their sleeves.
"Yaaa... I think I cried all my tears. I'm done. I have no more. Look." Lee Know scoffs and the others start laughing.
You turn around to see what they're laughing about and burst into laughter too when you see Lee Know holding his under eye area for Han to see his tear ducts.
"We're sorry for making you all cry." you and Chan smile shyly.
"Naaah, it was worth it. I got to see love. Even if only through your eyes. If you wouldāve seen each other's gaze on the other, you would fall in love with your love too..." Seungmin says and sends a finger heart. Felix agrees as he nods to Seungmin's words.
"Love you, guys. Be happy for us, okay?" Hyunjin says and hugs Jeongin that still can't stop crying.
Both you and Chan get up to comfort Innie. When you approach him, he hugs you tightly and speaks with a trembling voice "Thank you for loving Chan hyung so much. He deserves it. He's happier since he knows you. And sleeps more because he knows it's important to you. Thank you for taking care of him."
The boys gather around for a group hug, Chan still holding you and Innie close "Innie, she does make me extremely happy but you don't need to worry about me. You're my family, I'm the one that should worry, not you."
"Yah hyung! Of course we worry about you and y/n." Changbin rolls his eyes and glares at Chan.
"You- you worry about me?" your voice is almost breaking as you step back with an overwhelmed expression.
"Omg! And I thought I'm dumb. Y/n, if Chan hyung proposed to you, then it means you totally deserve it. And if he loves you, we love you. I'll probably cry every night because of your proposals. Although, Chan hyung, I'm sorry... but y/n's was better than yours." Jisung chuckles and shrugs, winking at you playfully.
"I know. That's why I love her." Chan proudly replies, pressing a small kiss on the top of your head.
You've found your family. The one that you didn't ask for but somehow received it. And you'll never let it go. That's a promise.
~~~~~~ time lapse ~~~~~~
"Have a great night, Mr. And Mrs. Bang" the same security guard nods with mischief written on his face.
"You knew??" you only blink in awe as your mouth falls open.
"The whole building knew, baby." Chan giggles and wraps his arm around your waist "But what the whole building didn't know was that you were going to propose to me too. In the most beautiful way..."
"I take it you liked the bags full of universe parts too..." the security guard smiles fondly as you hide behind Chan and blush.
"I loved it." Chan can't hide the happiness in his voice as he so proudly raises his hand to show him the ring.
"Congratulations, you love birds! May you two be happy and in love forever."
"Oh, we are and we will, thank you. See you in two or three weeks." your fiance replies and takes your hand before you both wave goodbye to the guard.
"Two weeks? Ohh he's taking a vacation?" you ask him all curious.
"Mmm nope. I am..." he turns you around and hoists you up, making you instantly curl your legs around his waist and giggle "My dear husband, you'll never stop sweeping me of my feet, isn't it?"
"And I dare you to try and stop me, my gorgeous wife...Now say that again." he demands playfully as he props your back on the car's door, still holding you tightly wrapped around his body.
"That again." you bite your lip to stop your laugh.
"See, this is why I love you. Because I knew you'll say that but I still asked for it..."
"Husband...my perfect husband..." you tangle your fingers in his curls as you pull him closer and press your lips to his. He kisses you like his mouth needed yours. Wet and salty from all the happy tears. Softly, deeply and oh, so slowly before he rests his forehead to yours and you both stay there in silence, letting out steamy breaths in the winter's cold air. There's no need for words when your hearts already declared eternity.
~~~~~ time lapse ~~~~~
He opens the door and lets you in first "after you, Mrs. Bang" and of course he slaps your ass and chuckles, hiding his hands at his back and looking up the ceiling, whistling like he wasn't the one slapping it.
"I knew it. But still entertained you."
"Is it because you love me?" he leans forward, his head tilted and lips puckered in anticipation of your answer.
"Nope. It's because I like to hear your giggle everytime you do that, thinking that I'm somehow surprised."
"HUH?? So you don't love me??? The audacity...ts ts" he puts one hand on his chest and pretends to be shocked and hurt.
"Nah, I just decided to propose to you because I liked the pic you left in the bathroom. Ahahahaa" you cackle and try to run before he catches you into a backhug. His small laughs with the little squeak at the end tickle your ears in the most beautiful way and you absolutely want to hear it forever.
You turn around to hug him and your lips can't help but let a chaste kiss on his chest, right where his heart is. Your words muffle at his chest, like it's meant only for his heart to hear you "I love you so much, baby. So so much."
"I know, my love. Because you always think about me and not yourself."
"What do you mean?"
You both waddle in slow steps as Chan gets on the sofa and takes your arms to gently rest them around his neck before making you sit in his lap. He grazes his thumbs on your cheeks and lowers his head to look into your eyes "You must've been terrified to propose to me, my love. I know that because you didn't find the rest of the notes. Otherwise you would've known that I proposed to you since when you were in the kitchen. Probably from being so caught up into making me feel loved, you even forgot to eat. Nope, two pancakes isn't food. Stop pouting, it's not gonna work now. That's why I wanted to have dinner with the boys because I knew you were starving.
Please don't ever forget about yourself, love. You have me already. My whole being revolves around you, because of you. And you're definitely wiser and stronger than me. For fuck's sake, you proposed to me. It takes biiig balls for a woman to propose to a man. I was a pool of sweat and had to change different shirts cause I was too nervous. Heck I think even my buttcrack was sweaty..." he laughs when the corners of your lips turn upwards and you show him a small flustered smile through the tears caused by his words.
"Then I think we both need a shower cause I was a mess too, baby..." you sniffle between short laughs when he brings you closer to his chest and his hand gently presses your head on his shoulder, caressing your hair.
After minutes of you being engulfed in his warmth and his scent, Chan suddenly gasps and startles you, making you worry as you retract with a puzzled face and searching for answers on his face "what's wrong, baby?"
"I just realized that we're gonna have to do vows at the wedding. If you turned me into mush now, at the wedding I'll be a puddle of tears. Oh naaauurr"
You laugh at his panicked face until he rubs his nose on your chest in an attempt to tickle you "I'll never have enough of your laugh. Speaking of laughter...wanna see the footage from the dozen rehearsals and the moments I left you the notes?"
"I honestly thought you'd never ask..." you chuckle knowing that he's definitely embarrassed of showing you the rehearsal.
When you both go to the study room to open the PC and check the cameras, there's a note on the keyboard
"Thank you for resisting the temptation of coming in here today.
I love you, Mrs. Bang.
Truly, deeply, madly and forever.
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