Daisy

 writing. dreaming. breathing. From the East

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Hey I'm writing a fanfic and I need suggestions. What do you think Fukuzawa's email address looks like

well I think it'd be really plain and old fashioned or something embarrassingly cat related. something like [email protected]? something like that maybe?

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Happy Birthday

POV: Fukuzawa is your teacher who helps you.

pc: pinterest.

It had been a long day at Y/N's part-time job. High School was tough. The teachers were demanding and because she was a senior, she had a constant pressure to get into a college. Honestly, it didn't matter much for Y/N.

Aspirations were expensive and she was not half as rich. For the most part of her life, Y/N could only remember having to always ask for permission to exist; to take up space. Having lost her parents at an early age, Y/N was bouncing from one relative's place to another in search of family. Although Y/N knew that she was loved and welcomed, she couldn't feel it. And that made all the difference. Between knowing and feeling.

Now living by herself, she was getting lonely in her studio apartment. It was getting cold and the finals were approaching her. Y/N had applied for scholarships, the ones that could help cover at least 50% of her college bills. Feeling as a burden to her relatives came with a cost of never being able to speak about needs. She had overheard several quarrels and squabbles regarding her from various relatives. Although she had started to work at a young age and paid for rent and stuff to her relatives, the nagging feeling wouldn't just go away. Which is why, she had bundled up a wad of cash, sent it to her relative's place and shifted away.

As a result, she had to be homeless for a few weeks. Sleeping at the internet cafe was the best she could do for those few weeks.

Aspirations cost money that she didn't have. But not having aspirations didn't bother her.

It was getting lonely. Y/N's birthday was around the corner. She'd soon turn eighteen. However, she had no one to celebrate the occasion with. What friends could she call when she didn't talk to anyone at school? What relatives could she call when she was the one to take leave? Time was constantly proving itself to be of expense she couldn't afford.

In a spiral of self-deprecating thoughts and momentary spur, she downloaded a dating app. Perhaps she'd meet at least someone to share her birthday with. That was her original plan. However, Y/N didn't seem choosy while swiping right for every other guy that came to her feed. It was an automatic response for a while, before she received a text on her phone.

The text read the following: "Are you out of your mind? You're way too young to be on these apps."

Y/N swiped back to check the age of this person. It turned out it was her language teacher from school, Fukuzawa Yukichi. She gasped, throwing the phone away from herself. She had finished giving her final exams. There was no way she'd cross path with him again. What's more is, he had always been the center of attention for a lot of high school girls. Naturally he had Y/N's attention too.

However, Y/N never expected to have his attention. But today was different. Y/N didn't know what to reply. Her first instinct was to delete the app and the connection. That was logical. But the darkness of her loneliness got the grip.

So, with an alternate personality, to push him away like she normally did, she wrote: Aren't you too old to be on these apps?

She nervously tapped the screen again and again, anticipating his reply. An hour went by before he replied. "I am deleting this connection. I don't talk with girls half my age"

Panic-striken, Y/N typed hard and fast: Can I meet you tomorrow? Just once?

Nope. was his answer.

It broke Y/N's heart. Rejection was all she ever perceived to have received all her life. So obviously rejection hurt her. She knew he was right. He was old enough to be her father. If he didn't want any troubles, he should be able to stay away from it. So she refrained from texting anything further to him. She instead went back to studying for her college entrance exams. It was hard. Lonely.

The clock gently struck twelve. Birthday. Burden. It was a burden to celebrate. It was depressing not to celebrate. So, a store-bought muffin, lit with a single candle stayed on the table as she forced herself to smile for a camera she set up for herself. The photo came out after a while. She pushed it inside an album with few pictures. One for every birthday. The first few pages were filled. Her with her parents. But now, the occasion was no less than a reminder.

From afar, her phone lit up. She hesitantly picked it up. The various online spams did wish her a birthday. But this time she couldn't believe it. Fukuzawa had wished her a happy birthday. For the first time in a long time, she felt her heart fill up. It was her first birthday wish in a long long time. Thank you, sir. She replied.

I will be going out for sushi tomorrow for lunch. You can join me. he had texted in a long message.

It's NOT a date. He added shortly.

Y/N chuckled to herself agreeing to his proposition.

The next day, Y/N fussed over what to wear. She took a leave from her part time job in a long long time. She couldn't complain. It felt nice. To worry about nothing for once. Fukuzawa was already waiting for her inside the sushi place. He had a gift and all for her. His eyes would flicker to her every other second.

"How are your studies going?" he'd ask in the middle. It was awkward. It felt like they had nothing to talk about but Y/N didn't mind. "Have you decided on a college? If not, I can help you with applications to my alma mater. They also provide good scholarships to students," he said. Y/N looked up from her food. "You will...help me?," she sounded confused and Fukuzawa's eyebrows were raised. "Shouldn't I?," he asked chewing his sushi. "I-I mean...wouldn't it be too much work? Also as the new term would start, you'd be busy," Y/N replied flustered. "That's for me to worry about.," he said firmly tapping his chopsticks onto the table. Y/N stared at him for a minute. For the first time in a long time, someone had told her not to worry about anything. To take it easy.

Perhaps to an outsider, it may look weird. But Y/N here was about to burst into tears. "But...I don't want to burden you," Y/N said gripping her chopsticks a little too tight, bent on doing it by herself.

Fukuzawa stopped eating, looking at her steady. "Does it matter if I am burdened? I have had a pretty good experience of being an adult. So believe in your teacher for once," he said lightheartedly. "Seriously, if you can't find it in you to ask help to others, you will drown before you know," he said, pushing another sushi into his mouth. Y/N looked at him with hope. "then...can I-," she stopped herself before asking the question. "You can rely on me whenever," he finished the statement for her. "But don't get any wrong ideas. I am worried about you because you have always hesitated to ask for help even when I am right there behind ya. So this time, I will make sure you get the help before you ask," he said with a smile looking at Y/N.

Y/N's eyes had turned big, looking at him with long lost hope. Why did she never see him when he was right behind her; looking at her; hoping that she'd ask him for help?

"And-," he started facing over his food, "happy birthday," he said with a smile on his face.

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Happy Birthday

POV: Fukuzawa is your teacher who helps you.

pc: pinterest.

It had been a long day at Y/N's part-time job. High School was tough. The teachers were demanding and because she was a senior, she had a constant pressure to get into a college. Honestly, it didn't matter much for Y/N.

Aspirations were expensive and she was not half as rich. For the most part of her life, Y/N could only remember having to always ask for permission to exist; to take up space. Having lost her parents at an early age, Y/N was bouncing from one relative's place to another in search of family. Although Y/N knew that she was loved and welcomed, she couldn't feel it. And that made all the difference. Between knowing and feeling.

Now living by herself, she was getting lonely in her studio apartment. It was getting cold and the finals were approaching her. Y/N had applied for scholarships, the ones that could help cover at least 50% of her college bills. Feeling as a burden to her relatives came with a cost of never being able to speak about needs. She had overheard several quarrels and squabbles regarding her from various relatives. Although she had started to work at a young age and paid for rent and stuff to her relatives, the nagging feeling wouldn't just go away. Which is why, she had bundled up a wad of cash, sent it to her relative's place and shifted away.

As a result, she had to be homeless for a few weeks. Sleeping at the internet cafe was the best she could do for those few weeks.

Aspirations cost money that she didn't have. But not having aspirations didn't bother her.

It was getting lonely. Y/N's birthday was around the corner. She'd soon turn eighteen. However, she had no one to celebrate the occasion with. What friends could she call when she didn't talk to anyone at school? What relatives could she call when she was the one to take leave? Time was constantly proving itself to be of expense she couldn't afford.

In a spiral of self-deprecating thoughts and momentary spur, she downloaded a dating app. Perhaps she'd meet at least someone to share her birthday with. That was her original plan. However, Y/N didn't seem choosy while swiping right for every other guy that came to her feed. It was an automatic response for a while, before she received a text on her phone.

The text read the following: "Are you out of your mind? You're way too young to be on these apps."

Y/N swiped back to check the age of this person. It turned out it was her language teacher from school, Fukuzawa Yukichi. She gasped, throwing the phone away from herself. She had finished giving her final exams. There was no way she'd cross path with him again. What's more is, he had always been the center of attention for a lot of high school girls. Naturally he had Y/N's attention too.

However, Y/N never expected to have his attention. But today was different. Y/N didn't know what to reply. Her first instinct was to delete the app and the connection. That was logical. But the darkness of her loneliness got the grip.

So, with an alternate personality, to push him away like she normally did, she wrote: Aren't you too old to be on these apps?

She nervously tapped the screen again and again, anticipating his reply. An hour went by before he replied. "I am deleting this connection. I don't talk with girls half my age"

Panic-striken, Y/N typed hard and fast: Can I meet you tomorrow? Just once?

Nope. was his answer.

It broke Y/N's heart. Rejection was all she ever perceived to have received all her life. So obviously rejection hurt her. She knew he was right. He was old enough to be her father. If he didn't want any troubles, he should be able to stay away from it. So she refrained from texting anything further to him. She instead went back to studying for her college entrance exams. It was hard. Lonely.

The clock gently struck twelve. Birthday. Burden. It was a burden to celebrate. It was depressing not to celebrate. So, a store-bought muffin, lit with a single candle stayed on the table as she forced herself to smile for a camera she set up for herself. The photo came out after a while. She pushed it inside an album with few pictures. One for every birthday. The first few pages were filled. Her with her parents. But now, the occasion was no less than a reminder.

From afar, her phone lit up. She hesitantly picked it up. The various online spams did wish her a birthday. But this time she couldn't believe it. Fukuzawa had wished her a happy birthday. For the first time in a long time, she felt her heart fill up. It was her first birthday wish in a long long time. Thank you, sir. She replied.

I will be going out for sushi tomorrow for lunch. You can join me. he had texted in a long message.

It's NOT a date. He added shortly.

Y/N chuckled to herself agreeing to his proposition.

The next day, Y/N fussed over what to wear. She took a leave from her part time job in a long long time. She couldn't complain. It felt nice. To worry about nothing for once. Fukuzawa was already waiting for her inside the sushi place. He had a gift and all for her. His eyes would flicker to her every other second.

"How are your studies going?" he'd ask in the middle. It was awkward. It felt like they had nothing to talk about but Y/N didn't mind. "Have you decided on a college? If not, I can help you with applications to my alma mater. They also provide good scholarships to students," he said. Y/N looked up from her food. "You will...help me?," she sounded confused and Fukuzawa's eyebrows were raised. "Shouldn't I?," he asked chewing his sushi. "I-I mean...wouldn't it be too much work? Also as the new term would start, you'd be busy," Y/N replied flustered. "That's for me to worry about.," he said firmly tapping his chopsticks onto the table. Y/N stared at him for a minute. For the first time in a long time, someone had told her not to worry about anything. To take it easy.

Perhaps to an outsider, it may look weird. But Y/N here was about to burst into tears. "But...I don't want to burden you," Y/N said gripping her chopsticks a little too tight, bent on doing it by herself.

Fukuzawa stopped eating, looking at her steady. "Does it matter if I am burdened? I have had a pretty good experience of being an adult. So believe in your teacher for once," he said lightheartedly. "Seriously, if you can't find it in you to ask help to others, you will drown before you know," he said, pushing another sushi into his mouth. Y/N looked at him with hope. "then...can I-," she stopped herself before asking the question. "You can rely on me whenever," he finished the statement for her. "But don't get any wrong ideas. I am worried about you because you have always hesitated to ask for help even when I am right there behind ya. So this time, I will make sure you get the help before you ask," he said with a smile looking at Y/N.

Y/N's eyes had turned big, looking at him with long lost hope. Why did she never see him when he was right behind her; looking at her; hoping that she'd ask him for help?

"And-," he started facing over his food, "happy birthday," he said with a smile on his face.

[id1367]

Manifesting academic success and an unlimited supply of cute stationery for the person whom you reblogged this from

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Lifeline

<in which, akutagawa is your mentor. And your only wish is to see him smile.>

Akutagawa x f!reader

Word count: 1.2k+

CW: violence mentioned; major character death.

PART - 03

Time had passed by quickly. He had grown pretty comfortable talking to me. “I am hungry,” I whelped. “Then eat food,” he said. I looked at the amount of money I had and immediately grimaced. “Are you a sadist or what? Why’d you keep reminding me I have no money?,” I complained. He stopped dead in his tracks. “You know what – You keep complaining that you don’t have money but you’ve paid for your share of food and refreshments well enough. How’s that?,” he asked looking at me. “Isn’t it obvious? Between the both of us, you earn more. So you should be the one footing all bills,” I said. He looked disappointed and defeated.

“I suppose I have enough money to spare,” he said, scratching his head as he looked through his purse. Unbeknownst to him I gave him a small, happy smile. “Wanna get some beer?,” I asked. He looked at me up and down once and something struck him. “No,” he said firmly. “What? Why?,” I groaned like a little kid. “You’re gonna drink without me anyway. Wouldn’t it be more monetary loss if you drink with me again?”

“Huh–I thought you’re getting the drinks”

“Don’t be an idiot. I don’t drink”

“That’s shocking. How do you handle everything without getting drunk?”, I asked genuinely trying to think. “I handle everything well because I don’t get drunk,” he said. I sighed, lighting up a cigarette beside him. “I don’t get it at all. You’re a difficult man to decipher,” I said. He looked at me once, and muttered something under his breath, yet I wasn’t able to catch it. “Where are we going next?,” I asked walking alongside him. “Tell me. I will pay at the next spot,” he said as if he had some semblance of pity for me.

“How about a spa? I have been wanting to go to one for so long. And by the looks of it, you look like you might need one yourself. You’re so stiff all the time,” I chided. His cheeks turned red as he raised his voice by an octave at me, “Shut it.”

It was hysterical and made me laugh and he shot me a warning look. Then he sighed and gave up. “Fine, spa it is,” he groaned. “Do you wanna go to the salon too? Get your nails and hair done or whatever girls usually do over there?,” he asked. I thought hard for a minute. Getting my hair done was a no-go anyways. I could get my nails done, but what use would that be of even? I looked at him, aware of the somber smile on my face that didn’t turn into anything more. “Nah, I am fine with the spa,” I replied. He looked at me for one minute. “You sure? I am paying,” he said, waving his wallet in front of me. “I am pretty sure,” I replied, smiling back at him. “That’s weird. I thought you’d be more interested in those kind of stuff, since you’re always looking at those kind of pictures,” he said, rubbing a hand on his neck, looking away from me. “It’s true. I have always wanted to do that kind of stuff. However, I never had the money to get them done, now I don’t have the time. How can I put it –,” I stopped, trying to collect my thoughts. “I have always been a kind of haggard ever since I was a child. So I kind of stopped wanting stuff like that,” I said with a small smile on my face. He was walking ahead of me and I mindlessly followed him. He stopped suddenly and my head bumped into him. “I’m so–,” I was about to apologize when he turned around. “You know–I don’t really think you’re a haggard. You can do whatever you want whenever you want, because you won't ever get this life back,” he said looking down at me. I didn’t know what to say so I just smiled at him. 

“You’re really sweet for saying that to me,” I tilted my head to the side a little to look at him. He was taller than I was, his ashy locks blocked his eyes. “So?,” he asked, pushing his hair back. “I am really grateful for your offer, but I genuinely don’t see the point,” I replied. He looked a tad bit disappointed but then he turned around. “It’s your call after all,” he said. 

The spa really helped me get freshened. My aching bones were relieved. By the time I got out, Akutagawa was sitting by the reception, being done with his spa treatment early on. “Wowww, your skin is glowing,” I said looking at his shiny face. He grumbled something about not having a choice. 

“It’s getting dark, huh,” I said, commenting at dusk. “I suppose so,” he replied dryly. “Wanna hit the bar?,” he asked me with a straight face. I gleamed up at the offer. “Sure,” I clapped my hands together with enthusiasm. The bar was crowded, however, Akutagawa got us a seat at the far end. “Do you drink a lot?,” he asked, leaning onto his hand as he stared at my face. The way he looked at me, so intently, made me flush. “I-well-,” I was fidgeting with my fingers wondering what to say. “I don’t drink too much…but well…,” I trailed off laughing. His face had turned into an involuntary pout. “So, you’re like an alcoholic, huh?,” he asked. At this point I was wondering if he was pulling my leg. “I am not an alcoholic…I just enjoy drinking sometimes,” I replied. “That’s the definition of alcoholism,” he said, ordering some cocktail for himself while I got myself a neat shot of vodka. “By the way, this is on you, right?,” I asked just to be sure and he nodded his head. 

It was getting pretty well into the night and both of us were somewhat drunk. “Aku-ta-ga-wa sir…How will you -hic- go back -hic- home?,” I asked, my body feeling hot. “Ungh– I-I will need a driver,” he replied, slipping onto the table. “Nooo~ you-you gotta pay first,” I all but slammed into him. He fumbled, reaching into his purse and pulling out a few yens. “Excuse me~ w-will this be enough to cover the bill?,” he all but shouted at the bartender. The bartender looked flustered but came over quickly and took a look. He returned the change and we somehow stumbled on our feet but got out of the bar. We hadn’t been far when I felt something climbing up my throat. I found a nearby dustbin and puked into it. I could hear Akutagawa laugh behind me. “Hahaha, you’re such a lightweight,” he pointed and laughed before his face sort of turned green and he started to puke beside me. “Yuck, go away,” I tried to push him but failed. 

Pushing and tossing, we reached a small river bank. The air was cool and the night was beautiful. For the first time in my life did I feel this contended. I turned to my side to see Akutagawa almost doze off beside me. It must have been the drunken daze but I reached out to touch his face. It had been the first time I had seen him be anything but grumpy. For a second I felt my heart squeeze so hard that I felt like I might die. I touched his ashy locks. Rashomon made a weak attempt to keep me away, but withdrew almost immediately. 

That night, at the riverbank, as Akutagawa slept on the grass, I watched his peaceful face, committing every bit of it into my memory.

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Lifeline

<in which, akutagawa is your mentor. And your only wish is to see him smile.>

Akutagawa x f!reader

Word count: 1.2k+

CW: violence mentioned; major character death.

PART - 03

Time had passed by quickly. He had grown pretty comfortable talking to me. “I am hungry,” I whelped. “Then eat food,” he said. I looked at the amount of money I had and immediately grimaced. “Are you a sadist or what? Why’d you keep reminding me I have no money?,” I complained. He stopped dead in his tracks. “You know what – You keep complaining that you don’t have money but you’ve paid for your share of food and refreshments well enough. How’s that?,” he asked looking at me. “Isn’t it obvious? Between the both of us, you earn more. So you should be the one footing all bills,” I said. He looked disappointed and defeated.

“I suppose I have enough money to spare,” he said, scratching his head as he looked through his purse. Unbeknownst to him I gave him a small, happy smile. “Wanna get some beer?,” I asked. He looked at me up and down once and something struck him. “No,” he said firmly. “What? Why?,” I groaned like a little kid. “You’re gonna drink without me anyway. Wouldn’t it be more monetary loss if you drink with me again?”

“Huh–I thought you’re getting the drinks”

“Don’t be an idiot. I don’t drink”

“That’s shocking. How do you handle everything without getting drunk?”, I asked genuinely trying to think. “I handle everything well because I don’t get drunk,” he said. I sighed, lighting up a cigarette beside him. “I don’t get it at all. You’re a difficult man to decipher,” I said. He looked at me once, and muttered something under his breath, yet I wasn’t able to catch it. “Where are we going next?,” I asked walking alongside him. “Tell me. I will pay at the next spot,” he said as if he had some semblance of pity for me.

“How about a spa? I have been wanting to go to one for so long. And by the looks of it, you look like you might need one yourself. You’re so stiff all the time,” I chided. His cheeks turned red as he raised his voice by an octave at me, “Shut it.”

It was hysterical and made me laugh and he shot me a warning look. Then he sighed and gave up. “Fine, spa it is,” he groaned. “Do you wanna go to the salon too? Get your nails and hair done or whatever girls usually do over there?,” he asked. I thought hard for a minute. Getting my hair done was a no-go anyways. I could get my nails done, but what use would that be of even? I looked at him, aware of the somber smile on my face that didn’t turn into anything more. “Nah, I am fine with the spa,” I replied. He looked at me for one minute. “You sure? I am paying,” he said, waving his wallet in front of me. “I am pretty sure,” I replied, smiling back at him. “That’s weird. I thought you’d be more interested in those kind of stuff, since you’re always looking at those kind of pictures,” he said, rubbing a hand on his neck, looking away from me. “It’s true. I have always wanted to do that kind of stuff. However, I never had the money to get them done, now I don’t have the time. How can I put it –,” I stopped, trying to collect my thoughts. “I have always been a kind of haggard ever since I was a child. So I kind of stopped wanting stuff like that,” I said with a small smile on my face. He was walking ahead of me and I mindlessly followed him. He stopped suddenly and my head bumped into him. “I’m so–,” I was about to apologize when he turned around. “You know–I don’t really think you’re a haggard. You can do whatever you want whenever you want, because you won't ever get this life back,” he said looking down at me. I didn’t know what to say so I just smiled at him. 

“You’re really sweet for saying that to me,” I tilted my head to the side a little to look at him. He was taller than I was, his ashy locks blocked his eyes. “So?,” he asked, pushing his hair back. “I am really grateful for your offer, but I genuinely don’t see the point,” I replied. He looked a tad bit disappointed but then he turned around. “It’s your call after all,” he said. 

The spa really helped me get freshened. My aching bones were relieved. By the time I got out, Akutagawa was sitting by the reception, being done with his spa treatment early on. “Wowww, your skin is glowing,” I said looking at his shiny face. He grumbled something about not having a choice. 

“It’s getting dark, huh,” I said, commenting at dusk. “I suppose so,” he replied dryly. “Wanna hit the bar?,” he asked me with a straight face. I gleamed up at the offer. “Sure,” I clapped my hands together with enthusiasm. The bar was crowded, however, Akutagawa got us a seat at the far end. “Do you drink a lot?,” he asked, leaning onto his hand as he stared at my face. The way he looked at me, so intently, made me flush. “I-well-,” I was fidgeting with my fingers wondering what to say. “I don’t drink too much…but well…,” I trailed off laughing. His face had turned into an involuntary pout. “So, you’re like an alcoholic, huh?,” he asked. At this point I was wondering if he was pulling my leg. “I am not an alcoholic…I just enjoy drinking sometimes,” I replied. “That’s the definition of alcoholism,” he said, ordering some cocktail for himself while I got myself a neat shot of vodka. “By the way, this is on you, right?,” I asked just to be sure and he nodded his head. 

It was getting pretty well into the night and both of us were somewhat drunk. “Aku-ta-ga-wa sir…How will you -hic- go back -hic- home?,” I asked, my body feeling hot. “Ungh– I-I will need a driver,” he replied, slipping onto the table. “Nooo~ you-you gotta pay first,” I all but slammed into him. He fumbled, reaching into his purse and pulling out a few yens. “Excuse me~ w-will this be enough to cover the bill?,” he all but shouted at the bartender. The bartender looked flustered but came over quickly and took a look. He returned the change and we somehow stumbled on our feet but got out of the bar. We hadn’t been far when I felt something climbing up my throat. I found a nearby dustbin and puked into it. I could hear Akutagawa laugh behind me. “Hahaha, you’re such a lightweight,” he pointed and laughed before his face sort of turned green and he started to puke beside me. “Yuck, go away,” I tried to push him but failed. 

Pushing and tossing, we reached a small river bank. The air was cool and the night was beautiful. For the first time in my life did I feel this contended. I turned to my side to see Akutagawa almost doze off beside me. It must have been the drunken daze but I reached out to touch his face. It had been the first time I had seen him be anything but grumpy. For a second I felt my heart squeeze so hard that I felt like I might die. I touched his ashy locks. Rashomon made a weak attempt to keep me away, but withdrew almost immediately. 

That night, at the riverbank, as Akutagawa slept on the grass, I watched his peaceful face, committing every bit of it into my memory.

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Lifeline

<in which, akutagawa is your mentor. And your only wish is to see him smile.>

Akutagawa x f!reader

Word count: 1.5k+

CW: violence mentioned; major character death.

Part - 02

I might have fallen asleep on my desk since the next memory that I have is the sunlight flooding the room as someone removed the curtains. I squinted my eyes from the sudden intrusion of sharp sunlight as I looked at a tall, slender silhouette. I raised myself properly, looking around, trying to make sense of where I was. The sheer amount of cigarettes and beer cans around me would make me nauseous on any other day, but there was a wave of confusion clouding me right now. There was a throbbing in my head, as if someone had gotten a hold of a hammer as they kept hitting on it.

“Finally awake,” I heard the gruff voice, the same one I had gotten acquainted to in the past few days. He stood leaning against his table as he held a report in his hands. In this light, he looked formidable, victorious. “Clean up your working space. I can’t have an alcoholic in my office,” he said looking at me sternly, one that sent shivers down my spine. It was a disapproving voice. I got to my feet quickly as I gathered the beer cans and threw them in the trashcan.

As I finished cleaning the last of ashes from the cigarettes on my table, he finally looked up at me. “You.”, he called out, his voice rough yet tender. “Did you stay over in the office during the weekend?”, he asked looking straight at me. I gave out a nervous laugh. “I–I went out occasionally. The work was to be completed urgently”, I said rubbing the back of my neck. 

His eyes furrowed together with disapprovement. He shook his head as he looked at me. “Go back now. Take the day off. I don’t want my apprentice to collapse on me while I do my work. The last thing I want to do is play nurse for someone who is dependent on useless vices”, he said.

I gave a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of my head, embarrassed.

“Then, you should take a day off too,” I said, politely. “You have been off on missions since the past two days,” I said. “A leader has to do set examples,” he snided. “But,” I stop few feet away from his desk, “I think you have set enough of them.”, I added.

He looked up from his reports, looking at me. “That’s rich coming from someone who couldn’t follow even one of them,” he said.

“No, I am following your footsteps perfectly. I skip breakfast when inconvenient, I single-mindedly follow work till I feel exhausted, and still push forward, and even while doing all of that, I manage to look fresh and nice,” I said, rolling my eyes.

He paused for a while, his eyebrows furrowing. “So, if you want me to be on top of my game, you will have to set a new example,” I said, leaning forward on his desk, resting my palms on his table.

I could hear a crack of the pencil he was holding, as he looked utterly defeated. “Fine,” he said looking up. And then he got up from his place as he strided towards me. “I want a six hundred word report on what you learnt today,” he said.

“Ehh…uhh…what?”, I watched him stupefied as he turned on his heel walking off. “You want me to write a report on…how I learnt to take a break…from you?”, I asked gaping at his back. “Oh come on…that’s just brutal,” I said rushing after him. 

“First, we are going to the clothes store. I can’t relax with this heavy clothing. Make sure you note that,” he said, turning to the elevator. His hands lurked on his phone. “Be a master of delegation when you are taking a day off,” he said looking at me. His usual steel cold gaze now turned something…normal. “That I am,” I nodded, chuckling.

A hint of smile ghosted on his lips as his fingers worked meticulously typing messages and instructions.

As we reached the ground floor, he was already striding off as the elevator stopped. But his prideful long strides had turned into more considerate way of walking.

As soon as we were on the street, he took a sharp left to a mall. “Sir,” I called out. “I don’t have money to spare on clothes,” I said, hesitant. Accepting one’s own poverty is a challenge.

“Huh? What’d you do with your salary?”, he asked, in a more amused voice. 

“I spent them on alcohol, of course,” I said matter-of-factly. He sighed. “You are an alcoholic down to your core, aren’t you?” he asked.

“You don’t understand,” I said exasperated. “Rarely do I get to taste some good, expensive alcohol. Otherwise, thanks to my wallet, I just get the cheap ones from the convenience store,” I huffed out a puff of air. He stopped on his tracks abruptly, making me bump into his back.

He turned around, raising a hand to whisk away a wisp of hair on my face. “You shouldn’t drink so much. You have promising potential, and I’d hate to see it go to waste just because I don’t like your drinking habits,” he said, his eyes steel cold, almost in a threatening way.

“O–of course, I don’t drink during work hours,” I said, nervously trying to get the conversation on track.

He just scoffed as he turned around, continuing to walk in front of him. “Also, I don’t have reasons to stop drinking,” I said, half-joking.

“You also don’t have reasons to continue drinking,” he quipped without turning around. I laughed nervously as he piled upon dresses on my arms.

I looked closely at them. “S–Sir,” I called out for him. “D–Do you like to dress as a woman on your days off?”, I asked confused looking at the collection. He stopped, turning around, his face flushed. “These are for you of course,” he said raising his voice an octave higher, scorning me for even thinking of something like this. “What kind of man do you think me as?”, he asked, sighing out loud as he ran a hand through his hair. “Moreover,” he moved closer to my face, a perplexed expression evident on his face. “Do you even see me as a man? More than a mentor?”, he asked.

My heart skipped a beat, but I tried to keep a neutral face. “That’d be highly unprofessional of me to answer.”, I said giving him a polite smile. “So that’s a yes?” he pressed. “I can’t say no. What if you fire me?”, I asked, flippantly as I went off to the changing room.

I must say, his taste in women's clothes is rather…exquisite. They are not only comfortable but they also look good. My comfort T-shirts could never compare to this expensive silky fabric. As I went out wearing his clothes one by one, he rejected every single one. 

Is he trying to just piss me off? Torture me by having me change so much? Making me feel ugly because these clothes are quite…exquisite?

Tired, I put on the last dress as I walked out. “Sir, if this dress doesn’t look good to you, I will leave right now. I don’t need them. Besides they are too expensive for m–”

“So, you can look nice once in a while.”, his voice cut me off as I looked at him. His hand on his chin as he carefully looked at me, clad in a baby blue short sun dress. “Very well, we will take this,” and just like that he had moved on to find clothes for himself. 

“Umm, sir, sir”, I tried calling after him. “I cannot afford this,” I said, sighing out loud, sweat bullets forming on my forehead. “Try cutting on your alcohol,” he said nonchalantly as he looked at two shirts, trying to decide which one to wear.

Here was the problem. Both the shirts are black.

I looked to my side to see a perfect white shirt. I raised it to Akutagawa’s figure without him realising it. It would look nice on him. “Wh–What about this one? It looks nice enough,” I said handing the shirt to him. He looked at it for a while, thinking something. “White is a bold color. What if I get someone’s blood on it?” he said with a plain face.

That’s a rather grim question to ask.

“Erm…you are on an off-day, so it’s less likely to get blood on them,” I replied.

“Very well, i will take them,” he said without hesitation.

“Don’t you need to check the size?”, I asked after him.

“No need. It will fit perfectly,” he said walking to the counter, paying the bill for both our clothes that surprised me a little. He walked into the changing room, and put on the clothes he had bought.

The plain white shirt and a pair of trousers.

But wait…doesn’t the lack of clothes make him quite…vulnerable? His ability stems from the amount of clothes after all.

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Lifeline

<in which, akutagawa is your mentor. And your only wish is to see him smile.>

Akutagawa x f!reader

Word count: 1.5k+

CW: violence mentioned; major character death.

Part - 02

I might have fallen asleep on my desk since the next memory that I have is the sunlight flooding the room as someone removed the curtains. I squinted my eyes from the sudden intrusion of sharp sunlight as I looked at a tall, slender silhouette. I raised myself properly, looking around, trying to make sense of where I was. The sheer amount of cigarettes and beer cans around me would make me nauseous on any other day, but there was a wave of confusion clouding me right now. There was a throbbing in my head, as if someone had gotten a hold of a hammer as they kept hitting on it.

“Finally awake,” I heard the gruff voice, the same one I had gotten acquainted to in the past few days. He stood leaning against his table as he held a report in his hands. In this light, he looked formidable, victorious. “Clean up your working space. I can’t have an alcoholic in my office,” he said looking at me sternly, one that sent shivers down my spine. It was a disapproving voice. I got to my feet quickly as I gathered the beer cans and threw them in the trashcan.

As I finished cleaning the last of ashes from the cigarettes on my table, he finally looked up at me. “You.”, he called out, his voice rough yet tender. “Did you stay over in the office during the weekend?”, he asked looking straight at me. I gave out a nervous laugh. “I–I went out occasionally. The work was to be completed urgently”, I said rubbing the back of my neck. 

His eyes furrowed together with disapprovement. He shook his head as he looked at me. “Go back now. Take the day off. I don’t want my apprentice to collapse on me while I do my work. The last thing I want to do is play nurse for someone who is dependent on useless vices”, he said.

I gave a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of my head, embarrassed.

“Then, you should take a day off too,” I said, politely. “You have been off on missions since the past two days,” I said. “A leader has to do set examples,” he snided. “But,” I stop few feet away from his desk, “I think you have set enough of them.”, I added.

He looked up from his reports, looking at me. “That’s rich coming from someone who couldn’t follow even one of them,” he said.

“No, I am following your footsteps perfectly. I skip breakfast when inconvenient, I single-mindedly follow work till I feel exhausted, and still push forward, and even while doing all of that, I manage to look fresh and nice,” I said, rolling my eyes.

He paused for a while, his eyebrows furrowing. “So, if you want me to be on top of my game, you will have to set a new example,” I said, leaning forward on his desk, resting my palms on his table.

I could hear a crack of the pencil he was holding, as he looked utterly defeated. “Fine,” he said looking up. And then he got up from his place as he strided towards me. “I want a six hundred word report on what you learnt today,” he said.

“Ehh…uhh…what?”, I watched him stupefied as he turned on his heel walking off. “You want me to write a report on…how I learnt to take a break…from you?”, I asked gaping at his back. “Oh come on…that’s just brutal,” I said rushing after him. 

“First, we are going to the clothes store. I can’t relax with this heavy clothing. Make sure you note that,” he said, turning to the elevator. His hands lurked on his phone. “Be a master of delegation when you are taking a day off,” he said looking at me. His usual steel cold gaze now turned something…normal. “That I am,” I nodded, chuckling.

A hint of smile ghosted on his lips as his fingers worked meticulously typing messages and instructions.

As we reached the ground floor, he was already striding off as the elevator stopped. But his prideful long strides had turned into more considerate way of walking.

As soon as we were on the street, he took a sharp left to a mall. “Sir,” I called out. “I don’t have money to spare on clothes,” I said, hesitant. Accepting one’s own poverty is a challenge.

“Huh? What’d you do with your salary?”, he asked, in a more amused voice. 

“I spent them on alcohol, of course,” I said matter-of-factly. He sighed. “You are an alcoholic down to your core, aren’t you?” he asked.

“You don’t understand,” I said exasperated. “Rarely do I get to taste some good, expensive alcohol. Otherwise, thanks to my wallet, I just get the cheap ones from the convenience store,” I huffed out a puff of air. He stopped on his tracks abruptly, making me bump into his back.

He turned around, raising a hand to whisk away a wisp of hair on my face. “You shouldn’t drink so much. You have promising potential, and I’d hate to see it go to waste just because I don’t like your drinking habits,” he said, his eyes steel cold, almost in a threatening way.

“O–of course, I don’t drink during work hours,” I said, nervously trying to get the conversation on track.

He just scoffed as he turned around, continuing to walk in front of him. “Also, I don’t have reasons to stop drinking,” I said, half-joking.

“You also don’t have reasons to continue drinking,” he quipped without turning around. I laughed nervously as he piled upon dresses on my arms.

I looked closely at them. “S–Sir,” I called out for him. “D–Do you like to dress as a woman on your days off?”, I asked confused looking at the collection. He stopped, turning around, his face flushed. “These are for you of course,” he said raising his voice an octave higher, scorning me for even thinking of something like this. “What kind of man do you think me as?”, he asked, sighing out loud as he ran a hand through his hair. “Moreover,” he moved closer to my face, a perplexed expression evident on his face. “Do you even see me as a man? More than a mentor?”, he asked.

My heart skipped a beat, but I tried to keep a neutral face. “That’d be highly unprofessional of me to answer.”, I said giving him a polite smile. “So that’s a yes?” he pressed. “I can’t say no. What if you fire me?”, I asked, flippantly as I went off to the changing room.

I must say, his taste in women's clothes is rather…exquisite. They are not only comfortable but they also look good. My comfort T-shirts could never compare to this expensive silky fabric. As I went out wearing his clothes one by one, he rejected every single one. 

Is he trying to just piss me off? Torture me by having me change so much? Making me feel ugly because these clothes are quite…exquisite?

Tired, I put on the last dress as I walked out. “Sir, if this dress doesn’t look good to you, I will leave right now. I don’t need them. Besides they are too expensive for m–”

“So, you can look nice once in a while.”, his voice cut me off as I looked at him. His hand on his chin as he carefully looked at me, clad in a baby blue short sun dress. “Very well, we will take this,” and just like that he had moved on to find clothes for himself. 

“Umm, sir, sir”, I tried calling after him. “I cannot afford this,” I said, sighing out loud, sweat bullets forming on my forehead. “Try cutting on your alcohol,” he said nonchalantly as he looked at two shirts, trying to decide which one to wear.

Here was the problem. Both the shirts are black.

I looked to my side to see a perfect white shirt. I raised it to Akutagawa’s figure without him realising it. It would look nice on him. “Wh–What about this one? It looks nice enough,” I said handing the shirt to him. He looked at it for a while, thinking something. “White is a bold color. What if I get someone’s blood on it?” he said with a plain face.

That’s a rather grim question to ask.

“Erm…you are on an off-day, so it’s less likely to get blood on them,” I replied.

“Very well, i will take them,” he said without hesitation.

“Don’t you need to check the size?”, I asked after him.

“No need. It will fit perfectly,” he said walking to the counter, paying the bill for both our clothes that surprised me a little. He walked into the changing room, and put on the clothes he had bought.

The plain white shirt and a pair of trousers.

But wait…doesn’t the lack of clothes make him quite…vulnerable? His ability stems from the amount of clothes after all.

[ashstfu]

i don’t think people understand how much of life is grief. not just people dying, but losing the version of yourself you thought you’d become. grieving the city you had to leave. the friends you lost not in argument, but in silence. the summer that will never come back. the feeling that maybe you peaked at 12 when you were reading books under the covers and believing in forever

[happyheidi]

｡ﾟﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ｡ ﾟ. July will bring blessings.

ﾟ･｡･ﾟ

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Lifeline

<in which, akutagawa is your mentor. And your only wish is to see him smile.>

Akutagawa x f!reader

Word count: 1.9k+

CW: violence mentioned; major character death.

Part-01

The first time that I saw him, he stood tall; as if immune to all the high balls that life threw at him. His eyes, unyielding, merciless of anyone he saw weak, useless. That was the only determination that I needed, the only motivation to keep walking the path, like Icarus. He was my Sun.

“Two things,” he gruffly said as he walked forward leaving me to stumble behind him. “Don’t get in my way. Don’t piss me off,” he scoffed, his speed never faltering. Without turning around, he said, “If there is anyone I hate in this world. It is the weak.” Then, he turned around, his eyes unforgiving. “And if you prove to be so, I will kill you myself,” his clothes lengthened with his ability, wrapping around my throat. His eyes guarded, angry, demanding. “Understood?” he asked gruffly.

It scared me. But I guess…I didn’t hate him as much to be afraid of his threats. Because there was a belief in me; a belief that he didn’t kill the undeserving, A small smile spread onto my lips. “If I would understand everything, then I wouldn’t have been assigned to you, as an apprentice, would I now?”, I asked in a playful tone. My weakness lies in defiance. Defiance of him. Defiance of his authority that makes him feel miserable. My weakness is the darkness that shrouds him.

The sharpness of his ability tightened around my neck, almost drawing blood from my jugular. “Don’t play foolish games. You won’t win,” his voice, a whirlwind of unaimed anger, undenied disappointment, and a deep understanding of the edge that i was walking on.

He let me go with more force than I anticipated, making me stumble back. “Well…Winning is not my goal,” I said, my voice raspy as I rushed behind him.

He groaned. “It looks like I have got a chatterbox for an apprentice.”, he rolled his eyes, turning a sharp corner, entering into a clothes store. His walk, his stride, his poise, spoke of nothing but the immense pride that shrouded his vision. Maybe, that’s another thing that I don’t hate about him.

He threw pile upon pile of clothes on my arms. “Go change,” he commanded. “I can’t have you walk around like a pauper when you are assigned to me,” he said turning to his phone. In his own twisted, gruff way, Akutagawa cared for people around him. It drove nothing but determination in me.

I needed to let this man see the light. To know that the world can be kind, if he is willing.

I change clothes after clothes as he denies every single one of my choices, made by the financial strain in my pocket. “Do you just want to look like a prim and proper beggar if I ever see one?”, he scoffed pushing a particularly expensive looking clothe at me. 

I feel his gaze lock at me as I come out dressed in the expensive shirt. He looks for longer than a second before turning away. “Good enough,” he barked out before going out to the reception, paying the costs as I watched confused, an argument ready in my throat. But his glaring gaze shuts me off before even words formulate on my tongue.

As he strode off the store, he threw the clothes bag at me. “I expect nothing but perfection if you are going to be by my side,” he said. A small smile crept up my face as I looked at him. “Perfection is the alias for Akutagawa, after all,” I jostled hurrying behind him. Behind his strong back, I could still see him rolling his eyes at my quips. 

“You are making me lose patience,” he said.

“Good. Misguided patience is of no use,” I quipped back.

“You–,” he placed a forefinger to his forehead, kneading his temples. “I ought to kill you,” he said looking back at me, glaring. He stops, looking back at him, taking two threatening steps towards me. “Pray to God,” his voice dark, gruffy and promising, “If I find a slight weakness in you…even a glimpse of it. You are dead then and there.”

I smile back at him.

“I look forward to it,” I said raising my hand forward for him to shake. He facepalmed hard, looking at me. “You–” he sighed out loud. “I am not sure if you are brave, or just a fool,” his eyes raked down my body. Thinking for a minute, his hand met mine. “One month. That’s it. Prove to me that you are worth it. Then I will acknowledge you as whatever you want,” he said, “I am a man of my promises,” he added, his eyes raking mine for signs of fear, desperation, despair, and submission.

“Well, I am honored to have struck a deal with you,” I say, a mirthless smile adorning my face as I cocked my head to the side to get a good look at his face.

He let go of my hand abruptly. “Follow. We have work. Meetings and what not. Port Mafia doesn’t work on promises alone,” he noted raking a hand through his hair. “If it did not, then they would not have you,” I say swaying the length of my ponytail as I walked beside him. He looked down at me, in sheer disbelief. “No one dares to even stand beside me, let alone an apprentice,” his voice, ice chilly was directed at me as a warning. I didn’t flinch. That’s a promise I made to myself a long time ago. Because everyone is afraid of him, he is afraid of everyone else, steeling forward through power alone. “Then that’s a disappointment.,” I noted continuing to walk beside him. “Walking beside you is more effective. I get to keep up with you,” I said.

His long prideful stride halted, as he stopped to look down at me. “Exactly what element are you made of?”, he asked scrunching his eyebrows together.

“You know…”, I turned to look at him. “You ask me not to piss you off. But when you have that permanent frown on your face, I can’t really understand you. I can’t point a finger on whether you are displeased, angry, amused, disappointed, or…sad. But if you smile,” I inch my face closer to his, “then I will know that you’re happy.” I gave him a wide grin as he stood shook.

“I don’t like it one bit,” he ran a hand through his hair. “Come on. I have work to do,” he said annoyed at me.

“I enjoy it thoroughly though,” I muttered under my breath as I looked at his big back, his prideful strides reduced to considerate pacing.

____________________________

Meetings after meetings hounded our time. I sat a few feet away from him doing calculations and matching files just as he asked. 

He looked up at me after a while. I could feel his eyes rake over my hunched body. “At least you can work,” he scoffed. I smiled ear to ear at that comment. “At least you have time to watch me work”, I retorted. He rolled his eyes as he got back to his work. “Write the reports. I have a mission to take care of,” he screeched his chair back getting up from his chair, throwing a couple files on my desk. “As you command,” I said, smiling at him. His mouth opened and closed as he looked like he wanted to say something but kept his mouth shut.  “I am not used to such smiley fools,” he turned on his heels and walked away, his long coat bellowing behind him. I propped my head on my palm as I looked at his retreating back. “I am not used to being such a smiley fool,” I muttered under my breath.

__________________________________

In a week, I had gotten pretty used to being under him. Being under him meant punctuality; meant order. I had my share of long nights in his office, raking tired eyes over files that repeated similar words. He had gotten a bit warmed up to the idea of me though.

“Are you going back?” he asked looking up at me as I stretched my back. “Are you?” I retorted as he rolled his eyes. “No matter what, being authority means having more work than most,” he said. A sad form of expression hounded from my face. “Then, I will wait till you finish,” I said as I took out a cigarette from my pocket lighting it up. His eyebrows raised up in a question. “Do you need more work?” he asked. “Depends..” I said folding my arms over the desk, and looking straight at him. “Will you give it to me?” I said taking a drag of a cigarette.

“You are quite…the hardworker, aren’t you?”, he chuckled mirthlessly. This was the first time I had ever heard him laughing. The smile is nothing less than exquisite music, the kind that is a masterpiece, the kind that can never be remade. “All to serve my one-in-a-million mentor,” I quipped taking in a drag of  the cigarette. “If you are going to do work, then I suggest you put down that tube of tobacco,” he said pointing at the cigarette. “I don’t want burn marks on my paperwork.”

“I want more money for overwork.”, I said crushing it down on the ashtray.

“You get enough”, he grunted.

“If I am going to have order an exquisite dinner for my boss with exquisite taste, then I will have to have money”

“No one asked you to do that.”

“But I want food.”

“Then order for yourself”

“It will be awkward to eat by myself”

He sighed looking up at me. “Order me sushi rolls,” he sighed. “I will foot the bill,” he added. “Such a generous boss I have,” I had an ear to ear smile as I looked at him. “I hate people like you, you know,” he added looking at me with stern eyes, “Disregarding me, defying me at all times,” he added.

My muscles twitch as I smile at him. “No you don’t. If you did, I would be dead at this very moment,” I said. His eyebrows twitched as he yelled, “Rashoumon”. Sharper than dagger pieces of clothe wrapped around my neck and wrists. “You are at my mercy,” he growled. “Don’t forget, I can kill you any moment you prove useless,” he tightened the grasp around my neck, almost cutting my airway off. His eyes narrowed at my pained expression before letting me fall onto the ground. A series of cough erupted through my body as he looked down at me. The smile didn’t leave my face one bit. “Aah… so this is how it feels,” I brought a hand to my throat. “You certainly are powerful,” I added. “Were you doubting it?”, he asked, seething.

“Doubt? Someone in my place has no right to doubt. But I will tell you something,” I said, raising myself onto my feet. “Your power has nothing to do with what you are today,” my eyes filled with determination, and conviction met his. 

A throaty, self-deprecating laugh erupted from his body. “Then how do you think I am here? King of the darkness that you know?” he asked raising his voice.

“How would I know?”, I shrugged nonchalantly as I lit up another cigarette. “But you are not the King of darkness. The darkness is the King of you,” I said taking in a long drag of my cigarette. 

His face contorted, falling from confidence to shock, astonishment almost. “Now, sushi rolls, was it? I will order them right away,” I said turning on my heels and walking away from him. A triumphant smile adorned my face as my back turned to him, leaving him to gather his words, his thoughts. It must have been a while since he was in such a predicament. 

____________________

A/N: This prompt was originally a bot on janitor.ai. I am just going to write on the story that I built up on there. It really spoke to me, so I thought why not try a full-blown fanfiction. Also, a lot of dialogues were drawn out through the songs I listened to, so there might be a slight pacing problem. If you want to listen to a playlist, I will link a few songs if you'd want.

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Lifeline

<in which, akutagawa is your mentor. And your only wish is to see him smile.>

Akutagawa x f!reader

Word count: 1.9k+

CW: violence mentioned; major character death.

Part-01

The first time that I saw him, he stood tall; as if immune to all the high balls that life threw at him. His eyes, unyielding, merciless of anyone he saw weak, useless. That was the only determination that I needed, the only motivation to keep walking the path, like Icarus. He was my Sun.

“Two things,” he gruffly said as he walked forward leaving me to stumble behind him. “Don’t get in my way. Don’t piss me off,” he scoffed, his speed never faltering. Without turning around, he said, “If there is anyone I hate in this world. It is the weak.” Then, he turned around, his eyes unforgiving. “And if you prove to be so, I will kill you myself,” his clothes lengthened with his ability, wrapping around my throat. His eyes guarded, angry, demanding. “Understood?” he asked gruffly.

It scared me. But I guess…I didn’t hate him as much to be afraid of his threats. Because there was a belief in me; a belief that he didn’t kill the undeserving, A small smile spread onto my lips. “If I would understand everything, then I wouldn’t have been assigned to you, as an apprentice, would I now?”, I asked in a playful tone. My weakness lies in defiance. Defiance of him. Defiance of his authority that makes him feel miserable. My weakness is the darkness that shrouds him.

The sharpness of his ability tightened around my neck, almost drawing blood from my jugular. “Don’t play foolish games. You won’t win,” his voice, a whirlwind of unaimed anger, undenied disappointment, and a deep understanding of the edge that i was walking on.

He let me go with more force than I anticipated, making me stumble back. “Well…Winning is not my goal,” I said, my voice raspy as I rushed behind him.

He groaned. “It looks like I have got a chatterbox for an apprentice.”, he rolled his eyes, turning a sharp corner, entering into a clothes store. His walk, his stride, his poise, spoke of nothing but the immense pride that shrouded his vision. Maybe, that’s another thing that I don’t hate about him.

He threw pile upon pile of clothes on my arms. “Go change,” he commanded. “I can’t have you walk around like a pauper when you are assigned to me,” he said turning to his phone. In his own twisted, gruff way, Akutagawa cared for people around him. It drove nothing but determination in me.

I needed to let this man see the light. To know that the world can be kind, if he is willing.

I change clothes after clothes as he denies every single one of my choices, made by the financial strain in my pocket. “Do you just want to look like a prim and proper beggar if I ever see one?”, he scoffed pushing a particularly expensive looking clothe at me. 

I feel his gaze lock at me as I come out dressed in the expensive shirt. He looks for longer than a second before turning away. “Good enough,” he barked out before going out to the reception, paying the costs as I watched confused, an argument ready in my throat. But his glaring gaze shuts me off before even words formulate on my tongue.

As he strode off the store, he threw the clothes bag at me. “I expect nothing but perfection if you are going to be by my side,” he said. A small smile crept up my face as I looked at him. “Perfection is the alias for Akutagawa, after all,” I jostled hurrying behind him. Behind his strong back, I could still see him rolling his eyes at my quips. 

“You are making me lose patience,” he said.

“Good. Misguided patience is of no use,” I quipped back.

“You–,” he placed a forefinger to his forehead, kneading his temples. “I ought to kill you,” he said looking back at me, glaring. He stops, looking back at him, taking two threatening steps towards me. “Pray to God,” his voice dark, gruffy and promising, “If I find a slight weakness in you…even a glimpse of it. You are dead then and there.”

I smile back at him.

“I look forward to it,” I said raising my hand forward for him to shake. He facepalmed hard, looking at me. “You–” he sighed out loud. “I am not sure if you are brave, or just a fool,” his eyes raked down my body. Thinking for a minute, his hand met mine. “One month. That’s it. Prove to me that you are worth it. Then I will acknowledge you as whatever you want,” he said, “I am a man of my promises,” he added, his eyes raking mine for signs of fear, desperation, despair, and submission.

“Well, I am honored to have struck a deal with you,” I say, a mirthless smile adorning my face as I cocked my head to the side to get a good look at his face.

He let go of my hand abruptly. “Follow. We have work. Meetings and what not. Port Mafia doesn’t work on promises alone,” he noted raking a hand through his hair. “If it did not, then they would not have you,” I say swaying the length of my ponytail as I walked beside him. He looked down at me, in sheer disbelief. “No one dares to even stand beside me, let alone an apprentice,” his voice, ice chilly was directed at me as a warning. I didn’t flinch. That’s a promise I made to myself a long time ago. Because everyone is afraid of him, he is afraid of everyone else, steeling forward through power alone. “Then that’s a disappointment.,” I noted continuing to walk beside him. “Walking beside you is more effective. I get to keep up with you,” I said.

His long prideful stride halted, as he stopped to look down at me. “Exactly what element are you made of?”, he asked scrunching his eyebrows together.

“You know…”, I turned to look at him. “You ask me not to piss you off. But when you have that permanent frown on your face, I can’t really understand you. I can’t point a finger on whether you are displeased, angry, amused, disappointed, or…sad. But if you smile,” I inch my face closer to his, “then I will know that you’re happy.” I gave him a wide grin as he stood shook.

“I don’t like it one bit,” he ran a hand through his hair. “Come on. I have work to do,” he said annoyed at me.

“I enjoy it thoroughly though,” I muttered under my breath as I looked at his big back, his prideful strides reduced to considerate pacing.

____________________________

Meetings after meetings hounded our time. I sat a few feet away from him doing calculations and matching files just as he asked. 

He looked up at me after a while. I could feel his eyes rake over my hunched body. “At least you can work,” he scoffed. I smiled ear to ear at that comment. “At least you have time to watch me work”, I retorted. He rolled his eyes as he got back to his work. “Write the reports. I have a mission to take care of,” he screeched his chair back getting up from his chair, throwing a couple files on my desk. “As you command,” I said, smiling at him. His mouth opened and closed as he looked like he wanted to say something but kept his mouth shut.  “I am not used to such smiley fools,” he turned on his heels and walked away, his long coat bellowing behind him. I propped my head on my palm as I looked at his retreating back. “I am not used to being such a smiley fool,” I muttered under my breath.

__________________________________

In a week, I had gotten pretty used to being under him. Being under him meant punctuality; meant order. I had my share of long nights in his office, raking tired eyes over files that repeated similar words. He had gotten a bit warmed up to the idea of me though.

“Are you going back?” he asked looking up at me as I stretched my back. “Are you?” I retorted as he rolled his eyes. “No matter what, being authority means having more work than most,” he said. A sad form of expression hounded from my face. “Then, I will wait till you finish,” I said as I took out a cigarette from my pocket lighting it up. His eyebrows raised up in a question. “Do you need more work?” he asked. “Depends..” I said folding my arms over the desk, and looking straight at him. “Will you give it to me?” I said taking a drag of a cigarette.

“You are quite…the hardworker, aren’t you?”, he chuckled mirthlessly. This was the first time I had ever heard him laughing. The smile is nothing less than exquisite music, the kind that is a masterpiece, the kind that can never be remade. “All to serve my one-in-a-million mentor,” I quipped taking in a drag of  the cigarette. “If you are going to do work, then I suggest you put down that tube of tobacco,” he said pointing at the cigarette. “I don’t want burn marks on my paperwork.”

“I want more money for overwork.”, I said crushing it down on the ashtray.

“You get enough”, he grunted.

“If I am going to have order an exquisite dinner for my boss with exquisite taste, then I will have to have money”

“No one asked you to do that.”

“But I want food.”

“Then order for yourself”

“It will be awkward to eat by myself”

He sighed looking up at me. “Order me sushi rolls,” he sighed. “I will foot the bill,” he added. “Such a generous boss I have,” I had an ear to ear smile as I looked at him. “I hate people like you, you know,” he added looking at me with stern eyes, “Disregarding me, defying me at all times,” he added.

My muscles twitch as I smile at him. “No you don’t. If you did, I would be dead at this very moment,” I said. His eyebrows twitched as he yelled, “Rashoumon”. Sharper than dagger pieces of clothe wrapped around my neck and wrists. “You are at my mercy,” he growled. “Don’t forget, I can kill you any moment you prove useless,” he tightened the grasp around my neck, almost cutting my airway off. His eyes narrowed at my pained expression before letting me fall onto the ground. A series of cough erupted through my body as he looked down at me. The smile didn’t leave my face one bit. “Aah… so this is how it feels,” I brought a hand to my throat. “You certainly are powerful,” I added. “Were you doubting it?”, he asked, seething.

“Doubt? Someone in my place has no right to doubt. But I will tell you something,” I said, raising myself onto my feet. “Your power has nothing to do with what you are today,” my eyes filled with determination, and conviction met his. 

A throaty, self-deprecating laugh erupted from his body. “Then how do you think I am here? King of the darkness that you know?” he asked raising his voice.

“How would I know?”, I shrugged nonchalantly as I lit up another cigarette. “But you are not the King of darkness. The darkness is the King of you,” I said taking in a long drag of my cigarette. 

His face contorted, falling from confidence to shock, astonishment almost. “Now, sushi rolls, was it? I will order them right away,” I said turning on my heels and walking away from him. A triumphant smile adorned my face as my back turned to him, leaving him to gather his words, his thoughts. It must have been a while since he was in such a predicament. 

____________________

A/N: This prompt was originally a bot on janitor.ai. I am just going to write on the story that I built up on there. It really spoke to me, so I thought why not try a full-blown fanfiction. Also, a lot of dialogues were drawn out through the songs I listened to, so there might be a slight pacing problem. If you want to listen to a playlist, I will link a few songs if you'd want.

[that-leo-writer]

When I stare at the ocean, it feels home. When I look at the sky, it calls me home. There is a place called paradise above it all. Perhaps when I transcend all level of dimensions, I will find it. But for now I can only have faith in one thing. There are pillars holding up the paradise. Thousands and thousands of pillars of beliefs. The longer I live, the further away I go from it. The more I think of it, The farther the dimension of time pulls me away from it. I have never ever thought of stepping a foot in it.

Perhaps, I had some other images of paradise. For me, it was a place where the gods and goddesses, tired from the whims of rules and regulations, dimensions of lies and truth, created a place where no pain existed. Hence, the dimension of sadness wouldn't hold them back from anywhere they wanted to be.

I am just a mere thinker; an imaginer. In the pursuit, I feel myself become an imagination; or perhaps an image. Always skewed, rarely accurate. A model; a partial representation of what life is supposed to be. I am a byproduct of the world, its history, and its choice. How do I even understand the concept of reality when everything is a representation of a scenery I used to draw as a child?

[that-leo-writer]

I always watched my mother give up something or the other for my father. In the meanwhile I learnt the art of sacrificing too.

But oh my, Oh my. When I met him, I learnt the beauty of sacrifice. The sacrifice of the last piece of chicken nugget, or the sacrifice of the last bit of sleep. It is all worthwhile when it is for him.

And for the first time, I understood my mother.

[harrysonlylover]

WAKE UP.

I’m not sure how I can put this into words or make you understand the current events. I’ve always been one to hide my private information for my own safety like everyone else on here, but that has to change today.

Most of you might hear this first from me, because western media is a bitch. I think we all know how “!srael” is a terr@rist state, and if you disagree in any shape or form, I’d like to congratulate you for being brainwashed by western propaganda.

You see, fighting for the freedom of Palestine is not a trend, it is a movement that needs action. What you may not know is that as a terr@rist state, “!srael” not only targets Palestine but many other countries as well.

Since october 9, Southern Lebanon has been targeted by “!srael” bombing villages under the excuse of targeting “m!l!tias”. To sum it up, over the past 2 months, we experienced breakage of sound barriers, heavy bombing and civilian deaths.

They exploded pagers that injured THOUSANDS, only to bomb a heavily populated area in the capital killing over 60 civilians including children and women, and they’re still under the rubbles.

Today, they attacked the South very heavily and are “asking” (more like forcing) the residents of the south and north to evacuate and their soldiers are calling it “mission Gaza 2”.

My world has always been different from many of you on here. I never thought that I’d reach a day where I’d wonder if I will wake up the next day or not. I have rage inside me enough to burn a nation and yet, I silently cry. My friends are displaced, the village where I spent my childhood in is being bombed. There are over 180 deaths and almost a thousand injury just from today’s bombing. This isn’t an escalation, this is war.

We are not savages, we’re educated and we shine abroad as great scientists, poets, scholars.

Even as you read this, you will never understand how this feels like, to wonder if you will live, and see your homeland get destroyed, and I hope from the bottom of my heart that you never will.

The USA is silent, UN is silent, Europe is silent. Stop believing elections, stop believing politicians. Everything is bigger than you could ever imagine.

Stop, please stop being desensitised to what is happening. You are not better than us. The only thing that sets a barrier between us is that your leaders have the upper hand and we have the resources and interests they want.

SHARE and speak up about Lebanon. Don’t let your kids sit and wonder years from now why no one stopped this because you are living it and the headlines of the newest pop song or celebrity gossip is not more important than sharing and showing everyone “!srael’s” terr@rism.

This may move you, or may not. But history repeats itself.

[walkingintheheartbreaksatellite]

Please spread awareness. If you can’t donate, talk about it. Never stop talking about it.

[stray-dogs-lost-dogs]

Can u write something like i’m dumb??

I'll try to do so

[id1367]

Manifesting academic success and an unlimited supply of cute stationery for the person whom you reblogged this from