I've been thinking about my practice of witchcraft, and how i want to keep it secular but I also want to keep using the Wiccan wheel of the year. And how to do that without the whole god and goddess cycle story, which I've never really vibed with even if I could convince myself to believe in gods.
My solutions for this are extremely personal, but in case anyone else would benefit from it, here's what I've come up with:
Midwinter/Yule: all I wanna do in winter is curl up under a blanket with a bunch of warm food and sleep. Preferably with my partner and / or child and/or cat. So I've decided to make that my midwinter ritual: on the longest night, we'll grab a bunch of food and all curl up together under the big rainbow blanket I made us last year, and eat, and tell each other stories, or watch movies, or all just geek out next to each other until we fall asleep in a big warm pile. Or that's the plan, anyway. Ever since I've decided this, I've begun seeing rest in winter as a form of worship, a spiritual practice, which helps me feel less guilty and frustrated about needing more rest. (note: celebrating midwinter will not replace Christmas with my extended family, but it'll be a nice, undemanding ritual before the excitement and stress of Christmas.)
Imbolc: the end of winter. We will make pancakes or crêpes as a last big warm feast before we start eating healthy again. We'll dress in brightly coloured carnaval clothes and light candles or fairy lights to coax back the sun (or remind ourselves that it is returning, slowly but surely). It's always darkest just before dawn; likewise, this time of year is often pretty miserable weather-wise in my country, so I need a festival to look forward to at this time in particular.
Spring equinox : spring is here! Spring cleaning begins, be it of body, mind, house, relationships, etc. This is when the work outside begins : I'd start planting seeds and seedlings out in the garden, start new diy projects, etc. Next year, I'll probably start painting the walls at this time, too. Decorate with the first flowers, air the house so it smells fresh, clean and air everything thoroughly, eat eggy foods like Victoria sponge cake or meringue, go see baby animals, etc. At this point I should be able to start going on regular walks outdoors again.
Beltane/May Day: this day is traditionally about sex and fertilization. I guess that could make it a sort of Valentine's Day equivalent, but I'd also like a more ace-spec friendly interpretation of it: a time to celebrate collaboration, friendships and relationships that have been fruitful and helped each party to evolve and improve. May day is also labor day, so celebrate the work you've done and your achievements since Spring Equinox. Drink wine or fruit juice, eat spring fruits and edible flowers.
Summer solstice: longest day, shortest night. A good time to remember that too much heat and light can burn us, so we must protect ourselves and keep cool: eat ice cream and salads, drink lemonade, go cool off at the pool or in the sea, go camping in the mountains, sleep or stay indoors during the hottest hours of the day and stay up all night instead, stargazing and telling stories. A good time for adventures.
Lughnasadh: first proper harvest, though if you have a garden you've probably been harvesting stuff for a few months now. You have bounty! Share it! It doesn't matter if your bounty isn't of the vegetable kind: you can give your money, time, or energy to those who need it. (if you have none of those things, you should be the one receiving those things) Host a barbecue, make a donation, volunteer for a good cause, babysit for free or run errands for a stressed friend. This is the festival of giving back.
Autumn Equinox : second harvest, end of summer. Now is the time to preserve what you have: dry, freeze, cure, ferment, basically make sure whatever bounty you have is going to last the winter. Eat bread and jam, decorate with pine cones, acorns, nice fallen leaves, sticks, etc.
Samhain/Halloween/last harvest: now is the time to let go of anything you've been holding onto that will rot or hold you back during the winter. Go through your stuff and Marie Kondo everything. Let go of bad habits and toxic relationships. Spend at least part of this festival alone, away from outside influence, and focus on yourself. Confront your flaws and find ways to fix or temper them. The time for shadow work is now. You can also celebrate more traditionally by wearing a disguise and trick or treating, handing out sweets. Tell yourself the sweets are old patterns you're giving to someone who needs them more, and your costume can be the reflection of your shadow. Bonfires are also common around this time, so any banishing spells using fire can be cast now.
I know many of these have little or nothing to do with their original purposes in Wicca, but again, I'm not Wiccan any more: I just need a routine and rituals on a yearly level, to rhythm my life, and Wiccan/pagan holidays are the ones I'm most familiar and comfortable with, since it's the only religion I've practiced for more than five minutes.
I plan on giving meaning to the times between festivals, too, but I'll probably talk about that in a different post.
