i do my own stunts!

john, 29, he/his, earth c's reigning hide and seek champion.

[stunttrouble]

thinking about him.

[stunttrouble]

[imgladyourehereholdme]

thinking about how milk jugs are so perfectly designed; not a bit of wasted space. the handle is part of the container as well and you can clearly see how much of the liquid is left. genius. im thinking of eating the mushroom growing in my frontyard whole. if even one person is nice to me today i will kiss them on the lips

[teuer]

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

Where does lasagna come from?

Wizards from a mystical land barely tethered to this reality wrote great spells in tomes called “cookbooks” that anyone can cast

[hollowtones]

thought it comes from caves

[hollowtones]

am i thinking of QUARTZ again

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

easy mistake

[hollowtones]

ah, nuts

[hollowtones]

(coincidentally nuts also comes from caves)

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

you are thinking of quartz again

[hollowtones]

[larval-tear]

ALL I WANNA DO IS *musket shot* *minutes-long period of silence interspersed with the sounds of a lead ball rolling down the barrel, fiddling with a cartridge, pouring powder, and locking the mechanism in place* *musket shot* *minutes-long period of silence interspersed with the sounds of a lead ball rolling down the barrel, fiddling with a cartridge, pouring powder, and locking the mechanism in place* *musket shot* *minutes-long period of silence interspersed with the sounds of a lead ball rolling down the barrel, fiddling with a cartridge, pouring powder, and locking the mechanism in place* AND *sound of a small coin purse being bluntly dropped onto a wooden countertop* AND TAKE YOUR MONEY

[636174657270696c6c6172]

im on caffeine and medical grade weed plants. Ill face a silverback gorilla and a fully grown male tiger in the middle of a field right now mate.  Geographic scan. complete. terrain mapping. Complete. perfect gps spacial awareness of their fangs and danger areas. 2 enemys. confirmed. time slows down and im creating illusions these beasts have never been able to comprehend. they arent attacking me because im not allowing their emotional state to reach the point where i am a threat.  the tiger and gorilla start fighting. im back flipping over them back and forth as they start to fatigue. i ride the tiger into the jungle, dissapear and disengage completely. now its me and the field gorilla. Hes tired. Im tired. Hes ugly. Im ugly. Hes smart... Im smart. I understand him. We become one. We cannot fight with ourselves. We fight to defend our selves. i teach him english...hes my son.

[durbikins]

i pirate movies by reading the synopsis then subconsciously have the movie play out in my dreams when i sleep. untraceable. hollywood can’t stop me.

[geniusoflove]

this morning when i was on register this guy gave me cash n it was all wet n he said sorry i fell in a lake

[waterthedirtflowerslastforyou]

dont make me tap the sign

[hyperthrust]

songs to be attacked by monsters to

[yesterdaysprint]

The St. Louis Star and Times, Missouri, September 21, 1938

[crowteeth420-deactivated2020083]

not pictured: me falling on my ass and eating shit the moment after i took this

((art comm. from @levwierectus !! thank u SO much charlie :heart_eyes ))

[pileofknives]

The answer is the 50 eagles and 10,000 rats. There's no other answer. The sheer mass of rats would smother every other animal and the hunter can't take out 50 eagles with a bolt action rifle.

[mockiatoh]

WHAT is the question!

[stunttrouble]

proud to be the dumbest john on here by design.

[animatedtext]

[hitmanagent47]

I wont lie to you I lost my dual pistols if you see dual pistols anywhere they are mine 

[kaijuno]