SuePhotos @suephotos - Tumblr Blog

The Health Care Freedom Act: A Transcript

INT. SENATE FLOOR - NIGHT

SEN. MCCONNELL addresses the august body.

SEN. MCCONNELL Okay, idiots. We’ve had seven years of the Obamacare hellscape, which, as everyone agrees, has ruined our country, killed jobs, slaughtered animals, and set the Bible on fire. But now the GOP is in charge – and it’s time for this national nightmare of “sick people being able to maybe not die or go bankrupt” to end.

SEN. SCHUMER Okay, you’ve been talking about a replacement bill for eight years. Let’s see what you got.

SEN. CORNYN Whoa whoa whoa – you’re being a little “pushy” there, Chuck.

SEN. SCHUMER That’s usually code for “Jewish.”

SEN. CORNYN Nobody said “Jewish.” I said “pushy.” You’re being pushy, is what I said. Don’t put words in my mouth. Anyway: read it and weep: the American Freedom Bald Eagle Old Glory Healthcare for Everyone with No Exceptions “It’s Gonna Be So Easy” Act.

SEN. WARREN …Where is it? We haven’t seen it yet. Can we see it?

SEN. MCCONNELL No.

SEN. JOHNSON A little history for you: when the Democrats wrote “Obummercare” –

SEN. MCCONNELL (chuckles) Nice.

They high-five.

SEN. JOHNSON – they did it in secret, in scarcely 16 months, behind closed doors, with not even 100 Republican amendments, and barely 70 public hearings.

SEN. MCCONNELL Like you can craft anything good in 16 months!

SEN. CORNYN In contrast to that undemocratic process, we, the GOP, spent literally dozens of minutes crafting this, over chicken caesar wraps and Arnold Palmers, earlier today in the senate dining room.

SEN. MCCONNELL Enough talking. We’ve been discussing this bill for almost eight minutes. Time to vote.

SEN. WARREN Can we see the bill?

SEN. MCCONNELL No.

SEN. SCHUMER Can we offer amendments?

SEN. MCCONNELL No.

SEN. WYDEN Can we have public hearings?

SEN. MCCONNELL No. Go back to Oregon, you dirty hippie.

SEN. COLLINS I’m voting no, Mitch. This bill is terrible.

SEN. MURKOWSKI I’m voting no too. It’s an abomination.

SEN. MCCONNELL (shakes his head sadly) Broads. Look, I know the bill is miserable. It would crash the insurance markets immediately. But who cares? This is just symbolic. This bill isn’t going to be a law. We’re just doing it to initiate a conference with the House, so we can actually pass a real bill later.

SEN. JOHNSON I just got a text from Paul Ryan. The House might just pass this bill.

SEN. MCCONNELL They might pass it?! Why the hell would they pass this bill we are about to pass?!

SEN. GRAHAM (fanning himself) This bill is abhorrent. It’s absurd, I say. I shudder to think what would happen if it became an actual law!

SEN. SCHUMER So how will you vote?

SEN. GRAHAM Oh I’m voting “yes.”

SEN. CAPITO This bill would devastate the people of West Virginia!

SEN. PORTMAN It would ruin lives! My own governor hates it!

SEN. SCHUMER You’re both voting for it, though, right?

SEN. PORTMAN Oh yeah.

SEN. CAPITO No question. Voting “yes.”

SEN. HARRIS Can we read the bill now?

SEN. MCCONNELL No. Any word from Ryan?

SEN. CRUZ I’ve been texting him a lot. No word. Oh – hang on, he’s writing back…I see the little bubbles.

SEN. MCCONNELL What’d he say?

SEN. CRUZ “New phone, who dis?” Guess I have the wrong number.

SEN. MCCONNELL No, that’s his number. It’s just: nobody likes you.

SEN. JOHNSON Ryan just texted me. I asked him if he could guarantee the House wouldn’t just pass our bill.

SEN. MCCONNELL What’d he say?

SEN. JOHNSON (reading) “Look, this is complicated. This stuff gets a little wonky – I don’t want to bore you with the nerdy, wonky details. I’m kind of a policy geek, so I kind of get down in there with the nitty-gritty stuff, that other people are bored by, because they’re not policy geeks like me.”

SEN. MCCONNELL …He didn’t answer your question.

SEN. CRUZ (checking Johnson’s phone) Let me see what number you have for him…yeah, that’s the same number I have. Weird.

SEN. MCCONNELL It’s not weird. No one likes you.

SEN. GRAHAM (lying on fainting couch) My fellow members of this most august body, don’t you see we are headed for a disaster? This bill cannot pass! It would upend generations of Senatorial norms and procedure, and devastate the very fabric of American society!

SEN. SCHUMER Still voting for it, though?

SEN. GRAHAM Oh yeah, still a solid “yes.”

SEN. MURKOWSKI I’m still a “no,” by the way.

SEN. COLLINS Me too.

SEN. MCCONNELL No one cares, ladies. Go get your hair blown out or whatever.

SEN. HARRIS Can we read the bill now?

SEN. MCCONNELL (angry) No! Why are there all these women haranguing me?! How many goddamned women are in the Senate now, 95?!

SEN. WARREN Twenty.

SEN. MCCONNELL Seems like 95. Look: no one gets to read the bill. It’s not a real bill! It’s not supposed to become a law!

SEN. JOHNSON What if the House just passes it?

SEN. MCCONNELL Call that little pissant Paul Ryan and tell him they better not!

SEN. JOHNSON (dials) Paul? It’s Ron Johnson. You better not pass this bill that we are about to pass, because we don’t want it to pass, even though we are gonna pass it!

SEN. MCCONNELL What’d he say?

SEN. JOHNSON He said the process of passing bills is wonky, and it’s hard to explain, and he’ll try not to bore me with the wonky details.

SEN. CRUZ Let me talk to him. (takes phone) Paul? It’s Ted. Listen, bud – (beat) Oh, sorry. Okay. (hangs up) It was the wrong number.

SEN. MCCONNELL We were already talking to him, moron.

SEN. PORTMAN No one likes you.

SEN. WARREN Can we read the bill?

SEN. MCCONNELL No. No more women talking. Time to vote. It’s a fake bill, and if the House passes it and all hell breaks loose, we can just blame Hillary or something. (calling out) Who wants to pass a fake disastrous bill that, if it became law, would cause the insurance markets to collapse, and 18 million people to immediately lose health care, but who gives a crap, because it’d be the House’s fault and no one pays attention to this stuff anyway?

49 REPUBLICANS Yay!

48 DEMOCRATS Nay!

SENS. MURKOWSKI AND COLLINS Nay.

SEN. MCCONNELL (aside) Must be that time of the month.

SEN. CRUZ Nice!

Cruz goes to high-five McConnell, who ignores him.

SEN. MCCONNELL Okay, one more vote. John?

SEN. MCCAIN I vote no.

Everyone loses their minds.

AMERICAN MEDIA MCCAIN VOTED NO! MAVERICK! ONCE AGAIN HE DEFIES THE PARTY! HERO! NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THIS!

SEN. MURKOWSKI …I voted “no” as well.

SEN. COLLINS Yeah, Lisa and I are also Republicans who defied–

AMERICAN MEDIA WE REPEAT: THIS IS UNPRECEDENTED! LITERALLY ONLY JOHN MCCAIN WOULD EVER DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS! PLUS HE HAS CANCER – AND HE STILL CAME HERE AND VOTED!

SEN. HIRONO I have Stage 4 kidney cancer, and I voted –

AMERICAN MEDIA JOHN MCCAIN JUST DID SOMETHING THAT LITERALLY NO OTHER MAN IN THE HISTORY OF AMERICA WOULD EVER DO EVER!

SEN. CRUZ Bummer, huh guys? Anyone want to come over to my place, get some wings, watch a little “Life of Brian?” No? Rain check, then.

Flourish. Exeunt. Curtain.

#sep120 #Untitled1135 @polyvore #polyvore #fashion #style #MichaelKors #Marni #KateSpade #MonicaVinader #Gucci #katespade #2015 #springsummer2015

#monicavinader #style #fashion #marni #katespade #polyvore #gucci #untitled1135 #2015 #sep120 #michaelkors #springsummer2015

Color Block by sep120 featuring a wrap dress

Diane Von Furstenberg wrap dress / Miu Miu leather shoes / Coach white purse / Blu Bijoux block earrings

#polyvore #fashion #style #Diane Von Furstenberg #Miu Miu #Coach #Blu Bijoux #colorblock #fuchsia #2015 #springsummer2015

fightingforanimals-deactivated2

How dog breeders have “improved” breeds over the past 100 years.

The basset hound never used to sit so low. The dog has suffered changes to his rear leg structure, has excessive skin, vertebrae problems, droopy eyes that are prone to ectropion and entropion, and excessively large ears.

The bull terrier used to be an athletic dog, but over the years his snout was mutated to be oversized and bending downwards, leading to respiratory issues. Many bull terriers have supernumerary teeth and are compulsive tail chasers and air biters owing to brain deformities.

The boxer now has a much shorter face with an extremely short snout. The hindquarters are also lower. Like all brachycephalic dogs, the boxer has difficulty controlling his temperature in hot weather, meaning they are prone to overheating and collapsing in the summer. The boxer also has one of the highest cancer rates among dog breeds and many modern day boxers suffer from seizures.

The english bulldog has evolved into a creature that suffers from almost every known disease. A kennel club survey conducted in 2004 found that they die on average at only 6 years and 4 months old. They cannot mate without human intervention, and cannot give birth naturally due to their giant heads. There is no such thing as a truly healthy bulldog.

The dachshund, at one time, used to have functional legs and necks for their size. Their backs and legs have gotten longer, chest jutted forward, and legs have shrunk to such proportions that there is barely any clearance between their chest and the floor. Obese dachshunds usually have to actually drag their bellies across the ground. Their risk for intervertebral disc disease - which can result in paralysis - is extremely high. They are also prone to achrondoplastic related pathologies, progressive retinal apathy, and problems with their legs and joints.

Pugs are the most inbred breed of dog in existence - an investigation carried out found that amongst the 10,000 pugs found in the UK are so inbred, the gene pool consists of the equivalent of only 50 individuals. They are extremely brachycephalic, and suffer severely from all the associated problems - the folds in their face frequently get infected, they struggle to breathe (making snoring/snorting/huffing noises even without moving), they have high blood pressure, low oxygenation, often collapse and die in the summer or if allowed to overheat, dentition problems due to their skulls being so curled in, and perhaps most shocking - their double curled tail is actually a genetic defect, and in its most serious forms leads to paralysis and many dogs needed a wheelchair or being euthanised if this progresses. These dogs are usually culled if they fail to produce this ‘attractive’ trait.

Healthy puppies that do not succumb to these ridiculous modern day breed standards are usually culled. One very heartbreaking example is the rhodesian ridgeback. The ridge is actually a genetic deformity - a mild form of spinal bifida - and puppies born without this ridge are healthy - but since the ridge is their namesake, healthy puppies are normally culled at birth and only those with noticeable ridges are bred from, thus passing the disability down to future dogs. Below is a ridgeback alongside a healthy, ridgeless dog.

3 to 4 million dogs and cats are killed every year because shelters are too full…. people are choosing to buy from breeders or shops instead of offering them a home.

Homeless animals outnumber homeless people by 5:1.

Only 1 in 10 dogs will ever find a permanent home.

25 PER CENT OF DOGS THAT ENTER SHELTERS ARE PUREBREEDS.

Please consider adopting a homeless dog. Please don’t encourage breeding these animals when there are so many being killed every year. Breeding is a profit, not “just” a hobby, and even if you think your breeder is reputable, they are still churning out puppies into a world where pets are seen as disposable.

scalestails

This post is EXTREMELY important and I want all of you to read it.

NEVER buy a dog. Adoption should be your only option.

midnightwillowwolf

THIS. EVERYTHING IN THIS POST IS GOLD. YOU FUCKERS READ UP

lookdespair

Do not buy a dog from a breeder. A dog is not the living equivalent of a designer bag. Adopt a dog. Stop supporting the business of genetic mutilation for aesthetic.

miamisugarx-deactivated20150502

I don’t care if this isn’t my blog aesthetic, you shouldn’t either. Please please PLEASE ADOPT!!!!! IF YOU TELL ME ABOUT YOUR NEW PUPPY THAT YOU “BOUGHT” I WILL FUCKING PUNCH YOU!

livesickdieill

Adoption is seriously the best. Plus foster if you can.

artisansoulleader

I am truly horrified. And the fact that pugs are super inbred does not surprise me, you can see it in their faces :O

Hands Up, Walk Out, UMass Amherst, Dec. 1 #HandsUpWalkOut #BlackLivesMatter

#handsupwalkout #blacklivesmatter

Hands Up, Walk Out, UMass, Amherst, Dec 1

Cobalt

Cobalt by sep120 on polyvore.com

Sets Including My Photography Part 2

Sets Including My Photography Part 2 by sep120 on polyvore.com

And yet, people keep on blaming the protesters for the looting, saying "the community" is at fault for doing protest wrong, and cops were right to use rubber bullets and teargas on the protesters, because they're lawless and destructive.

#Ferguson

I won't conflate someone being shot by a person entrusted with maintaining the public safety as the equivalent to a neighborhood murder— Munk(@Felonious_munk) August 11, 2014 1st tool in the derailment box RT @TheGrapevineTV: @Felonious_munk @prof_carrington why are these two issues being conflated?— Munk (@Felonious_munk) August 11, 2014

#Ferguson

Cobalt

Cobalt by sep120 on polyvore.com