Suncatcher

Sun/suns, he/she/they / a log of my life, an attempt to catch the sunny moments

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9.11.2025 - Log 1

I wanted to make this blog as a sort of letter of self love. I wanted to show the progress I was making in my life, as well as the good things that have happened. An abstract form of journalling, while not replacing my actual journaling.

So a progress log. I am calling the act of logging here suncatching. I want to catch parts of the sun, the warmth, happiness, pride, and log them here.

Hopefully I get creative with it. We will see, Uni takes up a lot of time! There are few expectations here.

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22.11.2025 4:14PM -Log 12

Did life drawing in class yesterday heres some of those

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18.11.2025 12:06 - Log 11

Bones

I visit Doctor’s Offices.

An X-Ray, then labwork

These horrible pains.

Knees, ankles, hands, joints.

Pressure, builds into burn, rippling sting

Back , shins, ribs, forearms.

Up and down the bone line, joints make sound.

Pop snap crackle, like old cereal

Rolling them, a personal boombox for animated sound effects

Stiffness starts,

pain medication stops working,

I lose the ability to concentrate.

Comfort comes from a boiling bath,

Submerged like lobster, till skin itches.

Falling asleep, ache crawls back in.

Pain compounds,

Anti inflammatories on routine like my grandma

And a segmented compartment organizer

Results come back normal

Except for a smooth digit on the

Right hand

Had nothing to say for itself except for its insignificance

Had it been asymptomatic

I imagine many insignificant bones that I will never know

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17.11.2025 11:29 - Log 9

Thumbnails and Discussion Roughs for an art assignment

Made sure to include my ocs cause its the only thing making this feel worth it. Thumbnails are almost completely illegible I wanna make a habit of doing thumbnail compositions more to get better at it.

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16.11.2025 11:04PM - Log 8

Mother Holding Hands with a Bottle

In your hand, loose,

glass gleams deep brown, it reflects against spottled skin

Your fingers, rough and clumsy know its texture well,

Long neck, sweating and cold fits palm’s shape

It’s halfway finished.

Departed weight signals your hand to twitch for the next

Stacked bottles, empty

Clutter in front of the table where I sit, dinner

Could have been 3 hours ago.

Meanwhile, I play with pieces,

broken glass

Cans crumple against my hands,

I push them together

Metal digs sharp Into my skin

Stinging.

I push harder

I splinter metal and skin together.

I mold cans like clay

to sculpt imitations of a you

Who is sober,

Says I love you,

Spends time cooking,

And dispels the

Slamming doors, stereo boombeats and

barking dogs

That cause the

Gnawing of my jaw

On most moonnights where I mostly wait

Down twelve stairs and to the right

Instead,

The now downed bottle is set,

Onto my plate.

I lick the rim and savour the taste

Locked in on my poetry class assignment today which involved writing two poems. Ill post the other one tomorrow

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14.11.2025 8:00 - Log 8

I went for bloodwork today and I met this reslly friendly old man who talked to me in line. He asked me if the animal keychains on my bags had names. I told him I didn’t and it made me wonder when I stopped naming things. I wasnt able to speak to him much after (I had accidentally gone a week too early and had to leave to a different lab) but it made me really happy that he had talked to me.

Ever since I have stopped wearing headphones I have been kinda waiting for that to happen, hoping for it even. It was a suncatching moment for me for it to actually happen.

My roommate also got me a really nice heatable plushie of a whale, which has been helping with my pain this evening and its been really good. I want to give it a name

It also snowed big chunky flakes today, I got covered in them and felt really beautiful.

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13.112025 9:37 PM - Log 7

Did some doodle concepts of stars with some pastels highlighters and fineliners

gonna use them for something later. Wanted to get farther but I am quite tired. Sorry to the star nerds theyre not fully accurate but i just took ones i liked

X rays came back normal, no bone pics yet but i am going to request them

Also watched perks of being a wallflower again and cried gosh that movie makes me emotional. I need to reread the book.

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13.11.2025 8:28 AM - Log 7

I have an X-Ray today, eight different body parts (joints), and i am full of energy.

Walked here in half of the time it should’ve taken me, like something possessed. I feel a bit possessed.

Got eggs and cheese to kill time because im almost out, barely anyone was in the store. I forgot how much I love the early mornings. They come to me with an air of welcoming comfort that can only exist with the emptiness of the streets and the presence of the early sun.

I have plans for creative activities once I get home as well as breakfast, but I will not say them here as to avoid fulfilling satisfaction from saying the action before performing it.

If I get bone photos I will report them.

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12.11.2025 - Log 6 12:32

Finished my Comparative Analysis today. 2 minutes before it was due i submitted it with some sources not fully cited because I figured I would have more time. It is what it is, I think I did a pretty decent job on it. It is 30% of my grade so I sure hope it is up to standard.

Also went on a walk, have been having a difficult time with one of my roommates and I am tempted to find another place to live. Ive been looking at rentals we will see if they get back to me.

Gonna draw tomorrow and work on some poetry, excited!

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11.11.2025 1:21 AM -Log 5

Did some work on my assignment thats due tomorrow, making steady progress, did some deep diving on twitch and on old advertisements which was entertaining but also disturbing ahah.

Gonna finish my readings tomorrow and then write the rest of it! Feeling confident.

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10.11 .2025 - Log 4

Super distracted day, havent done much.

I just finished the clarity chapter finally, I am nearly at the end. Boy is this book emotionally exhausting. In a good way though.

Was looking at some others thoughts about Frankenstein 2025 this morning. It gave me a deeper appreciation for some of the allusions I missed or didnt appreciate as clearly. The creature reaching out to Victor as an extension of himself as babies do, the care that was crafted into the development of the creature similarly to the stages of development of people. Elizabeth’s fascination with the creature and her care of small things with only small likenesses to humans and Victor’s disdain for the creature having not perfect human form.

I decided I would really like to watch it again sometime to get a full understanding of the movie because I did really love it a lot I do not feel that was clear in my last log. I think the ending just fell a bit flat to me. In defence of the director the book does as well.

I have an assignment for class I need to work on now, lots of readings and it is quite a large amount of writing. It is due tomorrow so it isnt exactly worrying yet but I am doing a lot of waiting. For what exactly? Who knows, I am going to go think about it. Using some of the things from the book.

I will update again if I have some progress.

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9.11.2025 - Log 3

Got sidetracked… Watched the new Frankenstein movie

As someone who has read the book I thought the framing of the story being true to the original with the boat and the two different stories by both Victor and the creature to be really cool. I loved the set design, it was so beautiful and fit the theme really well. The tower, and the hut in the valley were both amazing place settings, the environments also.

I found the retelling of Victor’s childhood a bit odd, I understand it portrays him as more troubled, perhaps setting a duality between and William. Although it didn’t seem necessary, I am glad it was shortened though Victor blabs wayyy too much in the book.

I really didnt like how William straight up tells Victor that HES the monster, I wish it wasnt said straight out, with more nuance. I really liked Elizabeth’s character although I wish her own story was explored a bit more, it felt like there were hints are her not having a great amount of choice in her life that didnt feel explored in the second half. I MISS CLERVAL, why wasnt he there! Devastating. Also feel like Victor switched his tune far too fast and was redeemed at the end, it seemed a bit contrived. I did like the focus on the family theme and Victor as the creature’s creator though, It’s something not explored much.

I love the ambience and sound in the film, it was everything I could have hoped for. The casting was good, and I loved the look of Elordi’s creature, he looked slightly unsettling but also still beautiful and innocent.

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9.11.2025 - Log 2

Making my way through more of Welcome Home by Najwa Zebian. It has been helping me if nothing else, engage in some grounding exercises that are helpful. Even if I do not think it will fix me I am engaging with myself and that is something that is very healing

I am on the Clarity chapter — oh boy it is a long one.

Some notes from an exercise in it.

I have a lot to do! It is exciting though because I feel like there is places for me to grow and get bigger. Things to do.

Very eye opening for me to realize I hate being in art university. I think the path that is expected is not one I want to go down. I think I need to pick something that excites me and nicheify so I feel better about what I am doing. Comics and character design and concepting seem great. These are things I enjoy in my own work.

Want to try and find poetry and theatre groups around me. Sounds like a really fun job or volunteer thing to do.

My partner sent me a photo of them — theyre out right now doing exciting things. They looked cool so I drew them.

Am going to try and finish this section of the book and then move on to another activity. Maybe dinner…