this is why ao3 is superior 😭 I hope op has a copy of their work because, from what I’ve been told, wattpad won’t even warn or give you time to backup your work beforehand. they will just deadass delete your work. my friend once had their entire work—with multiple chapters—deleted by wattpad with no heads up. just a notification that says “your work has been deleted”.
seriously people, ao3 is your safe haven. there’s no censorship. no capitalism bullshit. you can post the most taboo, most shockingly messed up thing there and the site will protect you and your works. they even have their own team of lawyers to protect writers, writers’ works and writers’ rights to create whatever they want. no matter how controversial or taboo or explicit or dark or messed up your works are, they are protected and welcomed on ao3. stop wasting time with wattpad 😭
Writing smut without cringing the whole time? How do you do it.
Writing Smut 101: Overcoming Smut Shame
CONTENT WARNING: NSFW RELATED CONTENT BELOW.
The short answer, nonnie, is: you don’t.
That is to say, writing smut is always kind of cringe—especially if you’re new to it, or simply “not in the mood” to write.
But rest assured, feeling embarrassed is completely natural. The trick is learning how to overcome the cringe when it does happen, instead of letting it deter you.
I’m going to break this up into a few sections: 1) Why you might be feeling this way, 2) How I, personally, combat the issue, and 3) Some more tips that might help you get the ball rolling.
1. Why You “Cringe”
It’s important to find the root cause of any form of writer’s block so you can pull the weed out instead of just trimming it back. Smut writer’s block is its own special brand, and generally, the main issue writers have when it comes to smut is stigma.
Speaking openly and honestly about sex, in Western society, is still very much a taboo.
No matter how “progressive” we like to think we are, the inherent shame surrounding pleasure-seeking experiences, and the detailing/consumption of them, has been ground into us since we learned how to understand the concept of gratification.
And I’m not just talking about sexual gratification. This applies to everyday things, as well. Eating, shopping, relaxing (or doing virtually anything in capitalist society that does not directly contribute to capitalism).
So it makes sense that you would feel any amount of embarrassment, awkwardness, or “cringe” when writing smut. It’s something our society teaches us is wrong to want. Unfortunately, that shame translates to writer’s block when we sit down in front of the computer.
A lot of this blockage might stem from not giving ourselves permission to write the thing.
We’re staring at the blank document, knowing we want to write smut, and suddenly the thoughts start streaming in: This feels wrong, is this wrong? What if someone comes in and looks over my shoulder while I’m writing? Am I describing this right? Is this too unrealistic? I have NO idea what I’m doing, and everyone is going to know it.
These are all perfectly normal thoughts, and definitely ones I still have from time to time. But they’re also probably the direct cause of why you feel so blocked. Luckily, I have some bits of advice to give you on how to unblock yourself.
2. How I Combat Smut Block
✦ First, when the intrusive thoughts occur, instead of ruminating on them, think of each one as an impermanent object. You can use any metaphor, but I like to use the imagery of leaves:
Each negative thought is a leaf floating down the river of your mind. If you focus only on the leaf, you’ll exert a lot of energy running to try and keep up with it, consequently miss everything else around you. But if you acknowledge that leaf as a temporary part of the scenery, and let is pass, you can process and appreciate the beauty of your surroundings a whole lot better.
Remember: you are separate from your thoughts. You are not defined by them. The things you think sound stupid might be incredibly exciting to someone else.
If you can string a sentence together, you can write smut. This is all part of giving yourself permission to write the thing that makes you feel uncomfortable.
✦ Second, I’d suggest giving good thought to how you personally experience embarrassment, how you experience excitement (of the sexual variety), and how those two might sometimes commingle or feel similar.
For me, they are very comparable, like different shades of the same emotion—but there are differences which are important to note.
If I’m making myself blush from excitement, this is a very good thing for writing smut. It means that what I’m writing feels real enough to evoke something in the reader, even if the reader, like me, knows what’s going to happen.
If I’m making myself cringe, however, it may be time to take a step back and readjust my perspective.
✦ Third, ease yourself into it! Don’t jump straight in the deep end and expect to know how to keep your head above water if you’ve never swum before.
The way I eased myself into smut was first by writing “Steam”—a category of fic I made up because the current vocabulary lacked an efficient term for fics that straddled emotional romance and explicit content.
Essentially, steam is smut-adjacent but not explicit, and here’s a step-by-step example of how I transitioned myself smoothly from one genre to the next:
I first wrote my fics Wicked Game and You Are (both of which feature either a heavy make out session or teasing + lots of sexual tension) with this “steam” concept in mind.
I wrote the first chapter of Fine Line, which has brief but explicit descriptions of fantasies, framed by a very sexually charged scene.
I released my fic Crashing, which is probably more of a bridge between Steam and Smut, and features soft-focus fingering. Nothing in it is explicit—it focuses more on the emotions than explicit detail—but it’s very clear what is happening.
After I wrote those, I felt just confident enough to make that final stride over the threshold into smut. I wrote my fics Holy, King, and the second chapter of Fine Line all within weeks of each other.
And trust me when I say, once you get the momentum going and receive that validation from people who’ve read your work, it becomes SO much easier to sit down and start writing.
You just have to finish that first piece.
✦ Finally (and I know I’m going to sound cliche when I say this), just like any other skill, the more you practice the more confident you will feel and the better you will get.
So practice, practice, practice!
If you’re nervous about posting smut for the first time, have a trusted friend/mutual Beta read it for you. It’s the online equivalent to someone holding your hand before jumping off the cliff, and works wonders for the nerves.
3. Keep The Smut Rolling
Now that you have some tools to help get you past the blockage of writing smut, here’s how to keep the inspiration flowing.
✦ Start by incorporating smutty fanfiction/erotic fiction into your regular reading rotation-
Of course AO3 is a fantastic resource for smutty fanfiction.
If you’re a fan of TFOTA or ACOTAR and want some of my personal fic recs, visit my fic rec masterlist.
In terms of erotic fiction, my personal favourites are anything Anais Nin (specifically Henry & June and Delta of Venus), The Thornchapel series by Sierra Simone, The Godwicks series by Tiffany Reisz, and The Original Sinners series by Tiffany Reisz.
There are also sites like Literotica and sexstories.com, which play host to explicit short fiction (not fandom based).
✦ Next, I’d recommend having a designated digital space for smutspiration-
This can be a list of “smutty” words/phrases kept on a separate document on your computer, for those days when you just can’t think of the right way to describe something.
Or you can create a private side-blog or Pinterest board for your favourite smutty fanart or other kinds of visual smutspiration.
✦ For that matter, try following some smutty/18+ blogs (ONLY IF YOU’RE 18+) here on Tumblr-
Many of them have a plethora of what I like to call “lemony snippets”, a.k.a. short text posts that describe (usually in conversational language) explicit scenarios.
This is useful because it will normalise the concept of sexual fantasies in your brain, making it less weird for you when you try to come up with ones of your own to write into smut.
Not to mention, your dash will be rife with inspiration.
✦ I would also suggest checking out 18+ ASMR on YouTube (AGAIN, ONLY IF YOU’RE 18+).
My favourite account is Professor Cal Official, but Auralescent also has some good content.
Headphones are highly advisable for this, as their stuff is very dangerous for work.
So, nonnie, I hope this has provided you with at least one helpful tip. Whether you took anything away from this or not, just know that the feelings of embarrassment when it comes to writing smut are entirely normal. And the best way to keep those feelings at bay is to confront them head on.
As a lexicographer friend once confided over sushi, the dictionary takes its cues from use: If writers don’t change things, the dictionary doesn’t change things.
A good sentence, I find myself saying frequently, is one that the reader can follow from beginning to end, no matter how long it is, without having to double back in confusion because the writer misused or omitted a key piece of punctuation, chose a vague or misleading pronoun, or in some other way engaged in inadvertent misdirection.
There’s nothing wrong with sentences constructed in the passive voice—you’re simply choosing where you want to put the sentence’s emphasis—and I see nothing objectionable in, say, “The floors were swept, the beds made, the rooms aired out.” Since the point of interest is the cleanness of the house and not the identity of the cleaner.
this might sound stupid but.. how the hell do you tell the difference between having boundaries/squicks and being a straight up anti. because after looking through some posts of yours im starting to get worried I might be too puritanical for fandom </3
having boundaries/squicks = I personally hate this thing so I will curate my own internet experience by blocking/muting or ignoring what upsets me and minding my own business while letting others do what they want
being an anti = I personally hate this thing so I will shame and harass anyone who likes this thing that I hate, and I think that this thing should not exist because I hate it
You know that book you read, the one that was so incredible, you couldn't help but think "I will never be able to write like that"?
That author was once at your level. Everyone starts from zero. Everyone.
Ira Glass explains:
"Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap.
For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you.
A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this.
And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met.
It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through."
Writing smut without cringing the whole time? How do you do it.
Writing Smut 101: Overcoming Smut Shame
CONTENT WARNING: NSFW RELATED CONTENT BELOW.
The short answer, nonnie, is: you don’t.
That is to say, writing smut is always kind of cringe—especially if you’re new to it, or simply “not in the mood” to write.
But rest assured, feeling embarrassed is completely natural. The trick is learning how to overcome the cringe when it does happen, instead of letting it deter you.
I’m going to break this up into a few sections: 1) Why you might be feeling this way, 2) How I, personally, combat the issue, and 3) Some more tips that might help you get the ball rolling.
1. Why You “Cringe”
It’s important to find the root cause of any form of writer’s block so you can pull the weed out instead of just trimming it back. Smut writer’s block is its own special brand, and generally, the main issue writers have when it comes to smut is stigma.
Speaking openly and honestly about sex, in Western society, is still very much a taboo.
No matter how “progressive” we like to think we are, the inherent shame surrounding pleasure-seeking experiences, and the detailing/consumption of them, has been ground into us since we learned how to understand the concept of gratification.
And I’m not just talking about sexual gratification. This applies to everyday things, as well. Eating, shopping, relaxing (or doing virtually anything in capitalist society that does not directly contribute to capitalism).
So it makes sense that you would feel any amount of embarrassment, awkwardness, or “cringe” when writing smut. It’s something our society teaches us is wrong to want. Unfortunately, that shame translates to writer’s block when we sit down in front of the computer.
A lot of this blockage might stem from not giving ourselves permission to write the thing.
We’re staring at the blank document, knowing we want to write smut, and suddenly the thoughts start streaming in: This feels wrong, is this wrong? What if someone comes in and looks over my shoulder while I’m writing? Am I describing this right? Is this too unrealistic? I have NO idea what I’m doing, and everyone is going to know it.
These are all perfectly normal thoughts, and definitely ones I still have from time to time. But they’re also probably the direct cause of why you feel so blocked. Luckily, I have some bits of advice to give you on how to unblock yourself.
2. How I Combat Smut Block
✦ First, when the intrusive thoughts occur, instead of ruminating on them, think of each one as an impermanent object. You can use any metaphor, but I like to use the imagery of leaves:
Each negative thought is a leaf floating down the river of your mind. If you focus only on the leaf, you’ll exert a lot of energy running to try and keep up with it, consequently miss everything else around you. But if you acknowledge that leaf as a temporary part of the scenery, and let is pass, you can process and appreciate the beauty of your surroundings a whole lot better.
Remember: you are separate from your thoughts. You are not defined by them. The things you think sound stupid might be incredibly exciting to someone else.
If you can string a sentence together, you can write smut. This is all part of giving yourself permission to write the thing that makes you feel uncomfortable.
✦ Second, I’d suggest giving good thought to how you personally experience embarrassment, how you experience excitement (of the sexual variety), and how those two might sometimes commingle or feel similar.
For me, they are very comparable, like different shades of the same emotion—but there are differences which are important to note.
If I’m making myself blush from excitement, this is a very good thing for writing smut. It means that what I’m writing feels real enough to evoke something in the reader, even if the reader, like me, knows what’s going to happen.
If I’m making myself cringe, however, it may be time to take a step back and readjust my perspective.
✦ Third, ease yourself into it! Don’t jump straight in the deep end and expect to know how to keep your head above water if you’ve never swum before.
The way I eased myself into smut was first by writing “Steam”—a category of fic I made up because the current vocabulary lacked an efficient term for fics that straddled emotional romance and explicit content.
Essentially, steam is smut-adjacent but not explicit, and here’s a step-by-step example of how I transitioned myself smoothly from one genre to the next:
I first wrote my fics Wicked Game and You Are (both of which feature either a heavy make out session or teasing + lots of sexual tension) with this “steam” concept in mind.
I wrote the first chapter of Fine Line, which has brief but explicit descriptions of fantasies, framed by a very sexually charged scene.
I released my fic Crashing, which is probably more of a bridge between Steam and Smut, and features soft-focus fingering. Nothing in it is explicit—it focuses more on the emotions than explicit detail—but it’s very clear what is happening.
After I wrote those, I felt just confident enough to make that final stride over the threshold into smut. I wrote my fics Holy, King, and the second chapter of Fine Line all within weeks of each other.
And trust me when I say, once you get the momentum going and receive that validation from people who’ve read your work, it becomes SO much easier to sit down and start writing.
You just have to finish that first piece.
✦ Finally (and I know I’m going to sound cliche when I say this), just like any other skill, the more you practice the more confident you will feel and the better you will get.
So practice, practice, practice!
If you’re nervous about posting smut for the first time, have a trusted friend/mutual Beta read it for you. It’s the online equivalent to someone holding your hand before jumping off the cliff, and works wonders for the nerves.
3. Keep The Smut Rolling
Now that you have some tools to help get you past the blockage of writing smut, here’s how to keep the inspiration flowing.
✦ Start by incorporating smutty fanfiction/erotic fiction into your regular reading rotation-
Of course AO3 is a fantastic resource for smutty fanfiction.
If you’re a fan of TFOTA or ACOTAR and want some of my personal fic recs, visit my fic rec masterlist.
In terms of erotic fiction, my personal favourites are anything Anais Nin (specifically Henry & June and Delta of Venus), The Thornchapel series by Sierra Simone, The Godwicks series by Tiffany Reisz, and The Original Sinners series by Tiffany Reisz.
There are also sites like Literotica and sexstories.com, which play host to explicit short fiction (not fandom based).
✦ Next, I’d recommend having a designated digital space for smutspiration-
This can be a list of “smutty” words/phrases kept on a separate document on your computer, for those days when you just can’t think of the right way to describe something.
Or you can create a private side-blog or Pinterest board for your favourite smutty fanart or other kinds of visual smutspiration.
✦ For that matter, try following some smutty/18+ blogs (ONLY IF YOU’RE 18+) here on Tumblr-
Many of them have a plethora of what I like to call “lemony snippets”, a.k.a. short text posts that describe (usually in conversational language) explicit scenarios.
This is useful because it will normalise the concept of sexual fantasies in your brain, making it less weird for you when you try to come up with ones of your own to write into smut.
Not to mention, your dash will be rife with inspiration.
✦ I would also suggest checking out 18+ ASMR on YouTube (AGAIN, ONLY IF YOU’RE 18+).
My favourite account is Professor Cal Official, but Auralescent also has some good content.
Headphones are highly advisable for this, as their stuff is very dangerous for work.
So, nonnie, I hope this has provided you with at least one helpful tip. Whether you took anything away from this or not, just know that the feelings of embarrassment when it comes to writing smut are entirely normal. And the best way to keep those feelings at bay is to confront them head on.
I’m co-hosting a RavenPuff Masquerade this July! Write about anything Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw related. All stories are anonymous — we spend a week guessing who the authors are. It’s great fun, mixed with lying and mindgames lol
✨ You’ll get lots of positive, thoughtful comments on your story!
✨ Make new friends! These Masquerades are how I’ve met my closest writing friends whom I still chat with every day
✨ Rare characters or pairings encouraged
I’d love it if you joined me; these masquerades are always the highlight of the year. Please join Clementine, the friendly chaotic fest server, and read the full details there.
You must be 18+
Where: Clementine server on Discord
When: July 17 – 25
Wordcount: 300 – 2,000 words
Rating: Up to M
Hit me up with questions! I’m always excited to chat masquerades 💛
See tags below for just a hint of all the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw characters you could write about!
No matter how good your writing is, there will always be someone who doesn’t like it
Do NOT change the story to make it palatable to them. They will never like it. There is nothing you can do to make them like it
But there are so many people out there who will like it. And if you tone down the things that make other people not like it, you’re also toning down the things that make these people really like it
Would you rather have a story that’s loved and hated, or a story that nobody finds notable, and thus is easily forgotten?
Don’t tone yourself down to make people like it — tone yourself up. Make it so unapologetically you that instead of merely disliking it, they absolutely hate it
Because at least then you’ve left an impression on them, and how your story made them feel will stick with them, whether they like it or not
Our design professors advised: “If you’re going to do something that goes against every principle I’ve taught you, you need to go all the way. Make me despise it. A half-hearted attempt looks like a mistake. You need to take this so far, anyone who looks at it will say you knew exactly what you were doing.”
I see this in writing all the time. When you get feedback you disagree with, ignore the suggestion but examine the root. Why did they feel the need to call this out? Because it looks like a mistake. You didn’t go far enough to make it look intentional.
You need to weave your unique flavour so strongly into your words that no sane editor would ever suggest removing it, because that would cut out the beating heart of the story. Go all the way. Embrace your own style.
(Only my two cents. Everyone has their own thoughts on this topic, of course. But this is advice I agree with.)
when i forget to log into ao3 and i have to click proceed to see an adult fic, i actually get a kick out of it. like i am an old timey queen and my bard is apologetic: “gentle lady, dicks doth touch in this next ballad. would you prefer another?” and i give him a gesture of command like, “nay, you may proceed, minstrel. bring forth the tale of dicks”