Like sugar and cyanide.

Justine. Alive or just breathing? 06.17.35-02.04.11💞08.23.35- 11.28.14

[ithelpstodream]

[ifunanyaa]

[woodmeat]

[tonyhawksunderground2-blog]

why u lookin up almond joys in the background

[woodmeat]

I had beef wit somone

[kengriffey-jr-deactivated202102]

[ryangoslingofficial-deactivated]

remember that youtube channel where that guy smile and stays in one place for like 4 hours a day or a week or whatever and in one of the videos some dude broke in and barely opened his door and said “hello?”, saw the dude sitting there not moving, and left immediately

[ryangoslingofficial-deactivated]

skip to 2 hours and 36 min in

[gravegospel]

what the unlimited fuck

[mare-moment]

[dykedekuremade]

Being attracted to men is an endless cycle of “Wow he’s good looking” and watching that man do the absolute most to show you he’s hideous on the inside.

[wasteyourlife]

Where do y'all live and only find bad men?

[dykedekuremade]

Planet Earth

[just-shower-thoughts]

I hate that SEPTember OCTOber NOVember and DECember aren’t the 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th months.

[advanced-procrastination]

Whoever fucked this up should be stabbed

[themaddogofshimano-deactivated2]

If I recall, they did used to be the corresponding months.  It was just when Roman leaders Julius Caesar and Augustus came into power, the months July(Julius) and August(Augustus) were added, thus throwing off the numbering of the calender.

[gentlemanbones]

Good news, though: whoever fucked it up did in fact get stabbed.

[meangirlnurse]

one of my friends is a very pregnant dog and like 3 times a day i say to her “hello! you are full of several other smaller dogs!” and she wags her entire body at me like “it’s true!!! i contain multitudes”

[brehaaorgana]

i love that ur friend is the pregnant dog. what a nice friend to have.

[meangirlnurse]

ya she’s my buddy i love her!

[meangirlnurse]

update: there were five (5) smaller dogs inside my dog friend, but now they are all outside of her instead (!!) 

[brehaaorgana]

GREAT UPDATE NOW YOU HAVE SIX FRIENDS!!!

[meangirlnurse]

ya they’re my buddies i love them!!!!!

[dirtandleather-deactivated20171]

i found my new favorite post on this website 

[thebibliosphere]

I’m standing at the bus stop and some high schoolers were trying to decipher the new time table before eventually saying “idk ask the witchy goth lady” before promptly turning to ME and saying “excuse me m'am? When’s the next bus?”

This is it, I’ve finally reached peak aesthetic. I’m the local witch and I’m not even wearing a hat.

[thebibliosphere]

I should buy a hat.

[just-shower-thoughts]

Auto-Correct would be so much better if they based it off proximity of keys rather than context

[tonightweredrinkingfromthebong]

[carazelaya]

Friendly reminder this show was filmed in front of a live studio audience in one take.

[peculiaraura]

And that all sitcom laugh tracks are taken from this show because the laughter was so sincere.

[coyotescorner]

friendly reminder that this show was fuckin awesome

[theodorepython]

And most of the people who were recorded laughing are dead now. When you hear people laughing in sitcoms today, it’s the recorded laughter of dead people.

[adultgaywad]

Well that escalated quickly

[mymompickedthisurlss-deactivate]

imagine how cool it would be if your legacy was the sound of your laughter. your happiness.

[naamahdarling]

good save

[dogdownloader]

you guys all talk about how “petty” you are but one time my mom was so annoyed that the house was a mess that she made an actual vlog of her walking around the house and calling out every single family member for their shit and then threatened to post the video on facebook and instagram if we didn’t clean it up

[dogdownloader]

HOLY SHIT LMAO

[clientsfromhell]

Me: “How can I help you today, ma'am?” Client: “Is e-mail internet”? Me: “I beg your pardon?” Client: “Is e-mail on the internet? I have no internet, can I still read my e-mail?” Me: “Well yes, you must be able to get online to view your e-mail.” Client: “Oh, dear. I can’t see my e-mail.” Me: “Well, let’s see. Can you open up Internet Explorer for me and tell me what you see?” Client: “Open what?” Me: “Your browser, can you open up your browser?” Client: “My…my…?” Me: “What you click on when you want to browse the internet?” Client: “I don’t use anything, I just turn my computer on, and it’s there.” Me: “Okay. Do you see the little blue ‘e’ icon on your desktop?” Client: “You mean I have to start writing letters again?” Me: “I’m…what, I’m sorry?” Client: “I don’t have any pens at my desk. I just want my e-mail again.” Me: “No, ma'am, your desktop, on your computer screen. Can you click on the little blue ‘e’ on your computer screen for me?” Client: “Oh, this is too much work. I’m too upset. Just send me my e-mail. Can’t you send me my e-mail?” Me: “We…okay, ma'am. Can you tell me what color the lights are on your router right now?” Client: “My what?” Me: “The little box with green or possibly a couple of red lights on it right now - it’s most likely near your computer?”

Client: “Lights and boxes, boxes and lights, just get my e-mail for me.

Me: “My test is showing that you should be able to get online right now. Can you tell me what you’re seeing on your computer screen?” Client: “It’s been the same thing for the last two hours.” Me: “An error message?” Client: “No, just stars. It’s black and moving stars.” Me: “…Do you see your mouse next to your keyboard?” Client: “Yes.”

Me: “Move it for me.” Client: “Move it?” Me: “Yes. Move it.” Client: “My e-mail!”

[mer-squared-deactivated20200212]

This post gave me a fucking ulcer.

[admiretheart-deactivated2013081]

[therothwoman]

Pixar can never top this.

[kajsa-sosa]

when you woke af but it’s spiritually mentally and emotionally draining

[cannibalsuxx-deactivated2018080]

if you can’t read yourself how in the hell are you gonna read somebody else

[corvidaezero-deactivated2021061]

“As the father of no daughters because I’m literally in 8th grade, I think sexual harassment is bad.”

These kid are the future.