in #mysandbox ilya accidently becomes a swiftie while trying to piss off hayden. the pike girls LOVE her and always beg to turn her on. this happens at dinner one night while shane and ilya are over and jackie asks what everyone wants to listen to. the girls ofc say tay tay!!!!! as usual.
hayden immediately groans and rolls his eyes openly. "god she is so annoying, all she writes about is the guy that broke up with her that week."
and ilya doesn't know much about her, sure he's heard the singles. he's danced to blank space in the club and has drunkly sang love story with cliff at karaoke one time. but he loves pissing off hayden so immediately says, "oh, wow pike. i did not know you were so... what is woman hater word?" "misogynistic" shane provides next to him. "yes, thank you moya lyubov; misogynistic. boys write about break ups too, yes?"
hayden is pissed at the insinuation [and at shane for helping him] and to further press his buttons, ilya goes to the living room so he can dance with the girls.
this becomes a thing, swiftie dance parties with uncle ilya, and as he keeps listening he starts kinda digging the music. he stumbles upon marjorie one day and cries so hard he almost throws up, and suddenly he's buying pit tickets to the eras tour for him, shane, and the girls off of stub hub.
a video goes viral of him doing the fate of ophelia dance with the pike girls. shane is next to him and shaking his head but smiling, and after the "cause now you're mine" part he smacks a kiss against shane's cheek. the video ends panning over to hayden mad as hell in the corner with his arms crossed
