the light does not always reach my branches

ic vent blog for cavalarbor! 18+ only! IC findable! potentially upsetting or triggering material will be tagged appropriately! anonymous asks allowed

[sunsetcanopy]

watching tolya and belle and eating popcorn about it

[sunsetcanopy]

GOD no

no not

not directly. not solely.

you're dealing with a lot. everyone's dealing with a lot.

my nature won't let me just sit idly by and watch it happen. but.

it feels like acid and bile coming out of me the more i even expound on it but the point is

....

i don't know what the point is.

[ssunspoiled]

Maybe there doesnt need to be a point but to feel, and,let the feeling point out a need.? What I am dealing with will never be anny reason to make what you aare dealing with smaller. I dont want you feeling you have to make your self invisible or wantless or ssilent.. For anything. You ask if it seems like you havent been willing?To be closer? Maybe Ive been not picking up something left for me I feel like.. a fish under the eye of a bird, mmaybe Built up expectation, so unsure of what the expectation is. I want to know you,what would make yyou happy. Ive picked up more and more all that seems to make you unhappy.. I wantto show you my collections, Iwant to show you whereI am from, take you through a street festival back home, places even you have never touched or tasted I want I want I want II want to go back in time ,just en ough for the options to open again I want being confident in what you would enjoy not to feel like I would be unnaturally catering,when it would be the most naturalthing in the world if I only had it I would take that acid if I could.I hate I hate.That you feel like some show at the side. Like a spectacle That ,to even have wants is too much. If you want to improve things,I want you among the ones you improve it for. It Makes me happy.To see you happy. Allowed, to be happy.

Why should you have to keep silent?

[sunsetcanopy]

i have a habit of speaking in unsaids and expecting prose to be discovered in lingering voids. not needing to speak, for it's known what i'm explaining. the great musical poet gwen renee stefani said something to that effect.

but that's a big assumption on my end, isn't it?

i don't need you to show me what was, although i'd love to hear stories. that's what my life has been, in the grand scheme of things. thousands of thousands of thousands of years of stories. an unfolding, unfinished catalogue of life.

it would be a curious thing, wouldn't it? were there a cutting of myself in such a place. i'm in many realms that i purposely cut my knowledge off of, to preserve the decentralization. there i go again, though. i dump information when i get shy.

i suppose the expectation is to be wanted. which i am. obviously. your words and the depth of them illustrate that much. perhaps it's a feeling i'll shake. perhaps i crave the chase. i mentioned a hunger i detected a while ago, and maybe there's something about myself in that perception.

i've lived a life at the periphery of great people, of cataclysm and miracles.

but to be the miracle people look to the sky at...it's not meant to be.

i'm not sure where i was going. again.

i don't feel like you're catering, tolya. honestly. i think i'm just impatient, maybe. a little.

[ssunspotted]

Well. You will have me. And we may not be close, especially.But ,withyou willing.. Not lost really though, is it! Lost to the animal. Lost in the way that when a bird eats ,, its .khh about ninety per cent going to the soil But not gone. Lucky we have the fingers to put a bowl under us I dont.Not yet.

[sunsetcanopy]

i have been willing. have i not been willing? has it seemed like i haven't been willing?

i don't know.

i feel so selfish considering everything going on and it tears me apart begging and silently hoping and

i don't see the point in it.

what do you do when you feel like a roadside attraction in your own life?

[ssunspoiled]

Siobhan are you.. meaning all of that toward me?

Am I? Making you feel like a road side attraction?

[sunsetcanopy]

GOD no

no not

not directly. not solely.

you're dealing with a lot. everyone's dealing with a lot.

my nature won't let me just sit idly by and watch it happen. but.

it feels like acid and bile coming out of me the more i even expound on it but the point is

....

i don't know what the point is.

[ssunspotted]

Well. You will have me. And we may not be close, especially.But ,withyou willing.. Not lost really though, is it! Lost to the animal. Lost in the way that when a bird eats ,, its .khh about ninety per cent going to the soil But not gone. Lucky we have the fingers to put a bowl under us I dont.Not yet.

[sunsetcanopy]

i have been willing. have i not been willing? has it seemed like i haven't been willing?

i don't know.

i feel so selfish considering everything going on and it tears me apart begging and silently hoping and

i don't see the point in it.

what do you do when you feel like a roadside attraction in your own life?

[sunsetcanopy]

perhaps i should branch out

[sunsetcanopy]

much how a potato will grow its roots seeking the lush soil

so too must i realize there are other paths

[sunsetcanopy]

perhaps i should branch out

[sunsetcanopy]

i feel like i'm rotting

[rainingnight]

[sourisverte]

Dahlonega, North Georgia.

[unholyeldritch-deactivated20260]

Left abandoned, Mother Nature can once again take over.

[ur-daily-inspiration]

[mournfulroses]

Edgar Allan Poe, from Tamerlane & Other Poems of E. A. P.; “The Sleeper,”

[5555ilenthill]

[sunsetcanopy]

oh boy it's scarlet all over again huh

[hometoursandotherstuff]

I am completely fascinated by this abandoned home some urban explorers came across in Belgium. It’s covered in moss, which only adds to its charm, but look at the Plexiglas sunroom. 

Keep reading

[thatsbelievable]

[beautiful-contrast]