Trying to C H A N G E

[[ Independent RP blog for primarily Season 3 Bryce Walker from 13 Reasons Why. ]]

[sxdmonster]

OOC

[[As of 2/12/21:

I want to write in either tumblr messaging or on discord. Thank you. C: ]

[sxdmonster]

[[Is this fandom alive yet?]]

[thatoneimaginespage]

They’re so beautiful I’m in love and nobody can tell me otherwise

[rothelp]

miscellaneous angst starters.

when were you going to tell me?

you can’t keep doing this to yourself.

that’s…a lot of blood.

can you walk?

please don’t lie to me.

you were supposed to leave.

i’m not going anywhere without you.

shh, it’s okay. it was just a dream.

there was nothing more you could have done.

it wasn’t your fault.

this is all my fault.

you aren’t acting like yourself.

i’m never going to let [her/him/them] hurt you again.

you’re hurting me.

don’t ever do that again.

go to hell.

please don’t cry.

you have to stay awake.

i wish i could take the pain away.

you could have died.

hey – stay with me.

it’ll be over soon.

did you ever love me?

i’m sorry. i can’t do this anymore.

things won’t always hurt this bad.

you passed out.

how much have you had?

i’m okay. it’s all fine.

it’s not okay! you’re not fine!

let me get you something for the pain.

it’s nothing. it’s just a bruise.

it’s clearly not nothing.

have you been to the doctor?

i didn’t mean the things i said.

i thought we meant something.

people who are okay don’t act like this.

you don’t have to go through this by yourself.

i don’t want you to be alone.

please don’t regret me.

i heard you crying.

you need to get some rest.

when was the last time you ate something?

i’m worried about you.

did you have another nightmare?

[name], there’s nobody there.

i want to be happy but i don’t think i deserve it.

please talk to me.

why are you mad at me?

alcohol isn’t going to solve your problems.

don’t leave me.

did you do this to yourself?

it’s breaking my heart to see you like this.

tell me what’s wrong.

tell me how to make it better.

why don’t you care?

get the hell away from me.

please don’t do this.

i can’t believe that you lied to me.

just…stay for the night.

you obviously can’t be trusted to take care of yourself, so let me do it for you.

you can’t die. i won’t let you.

just hang on, okay?

hold my hand if you need to.

i’m sorry.

why do you have a gun?

don’t panic.

just breathe.

you’re bleeding.

i’m trying to stop the bleeding.

you’ve been crying, i can tell.

you should have told me sooner.

i wanted to tell you in person.

a phone call would’ve been nice.

i hate you.

i love you.

[fertilitasetmortem]

if u ship ur muse with my muse

PLEASE FUCKING TELL ME

because i might also ship it

but i would be sitting there like

welp, i would do this, but i don’t know if they like it

[sxdmonster]

@inxunionxtherexisxstrength

---- Bryce had ended up right in front of the other’s house, staring at the door calmly, all the while a battle was happening in his mind. 

She’s the only one besides Mother...

A sigh blew throughout his nose, as he lifted his hand and struck the door, knocking hopefully loud enough for the other teenager to hear him.

[sxdmonster]

crueltaes​:

Eyes roll, as if already tired by a conversation that had barely started. “Dude, I don’t give a fuck about that little shit, got no reason to go near him. I remember your little lecture.”

Bryce knew the other boy’s tendencies, his violent ones. With a carefully lifted eyebrow, he replied, ‘’...Sure. Right. Who are you trying to convince of that, dude? Tyler reached out to me again, obviously SOMETHING had happened.’’

[sxdmonster]

‘‘....Monty. Brother. I hope you’re staying away from Tyler.’‘

@crueltaes​

[sxdmonster]

[ Lets write something someone lol ]

[sxdmonster]

[[ who is on right now?

Let’s write. ]]

[sxdmonster]

[[ I'm in mood to rp through discord or tumblr messenger. Come hit me up]]

[sxdmonster]

[[ I’m still around. I just started on replies last night.will post them later ]]

[sxdmonster]

[[ dont worry, I havent forgotten about this blog. Just have been pretty busy in term of things]]

[sxdmonster]

bchindthemask​:

    justin stays quiet for a moment, knowing he probably never should have brought it up in the first place. ❝ change, like– schools, or yourself? ❞ he pushes his legs against the edge of the pool, sending him backwards and away from bryce. 

More silence. At least now on Bryce’s side of things. He kicke a bit at the water, watching a ripple expanded and eventually go away. ‘’Myself, brother.. I’ve got to.’’ It was nearly a whisper.

[sxdmonster]

bakedcookies​:

Quick trip is made to the kitchen, returning soon after with the cookies. A seat is taken next to him, quiet sigh escaping you. With everything that had gone on over the past year you’d come to expect that anything going on with Bryce would be a pretty big deal. You’d never been in court yourself, never been tried for anything, but you can’t imagine it’d be an easy experience.

Beer is opened, a few gulps taken before giving a nod. “Yeah, I can imagine. Well, you know, whatever you say in here stays in here. I’m not much of the gossiping type.”

Bryce eyed the plate just as it appeared in the room, watching its movements and finally being placed on top of the table. Mmmm, nothing like edibles. He watched the other for a couple of seconds, before picking up one of the edibles. 

‘‘Yeah, man.. whatever I tell you...’‘ He smirked, then smiled a bit sincerely. ‘‘...you never told anyone..’‘ He trailed off a bit, chomping now on the food. ‘‘one of the trustworthy brothers.. even.. my darkest shit. Hell, even my lightest shit.’‘ Like having a soft spot for Justin, for instance. Unspoken, but implied.

He finished up the edible before speaking once again. 

‘It’s just.....’‘ He paused, thinking of how to word things. ‘‘...I’ve been trying to work on myself... and it’s fuckin’ shit. Difficult.’‘

[sxdmonster]

inxunionxtherexisxstrength​:

She knew what darkness felt and never wanted anyone to feel that.

Her short hair was clinging to her body as she tried to keep her teeth from chattering since the water was ice cold.

Her hand was holding onto the ladder tightly while keeping him up above water. She had looked seeing two divers get into the water to help her.

She knew that people thought she should hate him but she wouldn’t let him die.

She kept herself above water not wanting to get out until she knew that they would be able too. She noticed the medics were holding Bryce up. She inhaled and went under water hoping she could make out any potential injuries.

She came back up and looked seeing the medics being a back board into the water.

She instantly figured out what they were going to do. She swam towards him..“I know this is going to be uncomfortable but they are going to want you to lay on the board in the water so we can get you out without hurting you worse”

She was holding onto the sturdy piece of plastic looking at the medics who were talking to Bryce. She kept the board still and before moving it closer to him.

She had an idea as she looked at the medics before looking to Bryce..“Listen to me, they are going to support you and let you  float on your back just so I can get this under you.”

She nodded..“It’s me, Hannah.”..she murmured when she heard him say the first two letters of her name. She never thought she’d be in the water right now helping to save his life.

Her lips were pressed together..“Bryce, this is going to hurt but they are going to lay you back. We have to get out of the water”..she had removed the straps just so she could secure them after to make it easier to get him out.

She could feel that she lost feeling in her legs while she kept moving them to keep herself above water.

Darkness... 

That very thing was so close with how he felt-- his vision still had the slight blackness around the edges from the pain he was in. 

Bryce heavily blinked his eyes over to her--

Yes, he heard right that time. his mind properly processed that name-- she.. she must be a fucking saint  for all he knew. He... was getting a second chance at life... all because of someone he screwed over. How-- How.. should he even feel about that? Could he even?

His mother... his mother was the kind one throughout the entire ordeal--

He found a stronger bond with his parent all because of it, and... would it be the same with H A N N A H ?

He nodded a bit, acknowledging the next thing the other spouted out of their mouth. He tried to take a deep breath-- letting out what he could in terms of trying to be prepared. ‘’O-Okay..’’ He nearly whispered to her. 

So quick-- 

The pain started to harshly spread-- and Bryce had to squeeze out a yelp to not let out a fullout scream come out. Even now he still had his pride. 

Fuuuck. I could really use an oxy right about now...

Relief finally spread across his body, as he laid there. 

‘‘W-What next?’‘ He squeaked out, trying to maintain his usual tone. He.. he really didn’t want to move again....

‘‘Can...I just.. stay here.. for a little..?’‘ 

[sxdmonster]

“You’re always there for me.”

‘‘I..... Even now through all this bullshit?’‘