I'll fly

Sydney Treviano. Twenty-five. My relationship with food is a lot less awkward than my love life. [rp blog only]

[famousgirlsgallery]

[calebfuckingcurtis-blog]

[Caleb nods a little, giving her a smile.]

Yeah, you do that.

[He watches her carefully, biting his bottom lip when she hurls herself at him. Caleb slips his arms around her, hugging her close against him, stooped down to more comfortably hug her. He shushes her gently as she speaks, shaking his head.]

Shh. You don’t need to apologise to me, Syd. I should’ve helped you more. 

[sydneytrev]

But I do, ‘cause I’m the one that left. And by leaving, I made it seem like I didn't want this life, or these friends, and I do. 

[She blinks up at him, attempting to collect herself] 

I don’t know what I’m going to do...Sebastian’s probably going to judge every move I make from now on and Zach--god, I should never make rash decisions.

It’s not your fault, Caleb, honestly--it would’ve happened sooner or later. I’ve just gotta make sure my head doesn’t explode or anything.

[calebfuckingcurtis-blog]

[Caleb blinks down at the tiny brunette, watching as she picks up her keys, schooling her expression a little. Caleb’s a bit surprised by the way she sort of shuts down - he’d always thought of Syd as a person who wasn’t shy about her emotions, so it was odd to see her hide them. He sorta understood, though - the way things were right now, it probably wasn’t the best to wear your heart on your sleeve. 

Caleb’s eyebrows lift, the crease between them smoothing out as Sydney murmurs about her intention, and his shakes his head a bit.]

I know you didn’t, Sydney. I know. 

[He bites down on his lower lip, wanting to hug her but not sure if he should - not sure if she’d be okay with it. So he wrings his hands awkwardly, not quite sure what to do with them.]

I uh… I missed you, y’know. I’m glad you’re back. 

[sydneytrev]

I--I don’t know if I’m glad, yet, to be honest. I’ll let you know.

[She forces another smile, deciding to inch closer to him--because, strangely, it didn't feel like he was out to get her. And Sydney needed that. What she had missed so much--the warmth that her friends brought--she feared she’d lack from the second she set foot back in the city.]

[Without another word, Sydney finds herself launching all of her just over five foot frame at Caleb, burying her face in the crook of his neck--which was a stretch, considering their height difference.]

I needed h-help, Caleb, but I couldn't ask anyone for it and that sc--scared me and I’m just sorry, okay? I’m really sorry.

[9two1]

[sebkyle-blog]

[Seb raises his eyebrows.]

Funny you asked, then.

[Seb looks her over for a moment crossing his arms. It’s apparent that Sydney’s shaken by Seb’s words–but dammit, she should be. Sydney of all people should understand that it just wasn’t okay to up and leave like that.]

Yeah, probably.

[He shifts his arms a little bit, looking down at the ground.] So where’d you go, anyway? Or why, might be a better question.

[sydneytrev]

[She just stares at him for a moment, fingers dragging through her chestnut locks.] I didn't do it on purpose, you know. I didn't...I didn't just wake up one day and think to myself, ‘Hey, I’m going to fuck up Zach’s life and decline the proposal, and while I’m at it maybe I’ll drop a few of my friends.’ That’s not who I am, and you know it. Yes, I know I hurt him and I know I dragged you guys down in the process. That wasn't my intention.

[Sydney takes half a step back, clenching her fist so that her nails dug into her palm.] I was...It felt like I had those days, you know? The days where, even if I looked intensely into a mirror, I still didn't see myself. And that was scary. That, and--I’m just so tired of carrying this anxiety with me, Sebastian. It’s like a constant weight on my shoulders. And you know I've struggled with it--why do you think I’d been flightier than usual on days when I should’ve been taking care of my business?

It had nothing to do with you, or with your brother. It had to do with me accepting that there is something wrong with me. And there’s--there are people who look at me like I’m the most precious stone in the world and I kind of just want to scream at them because they don’t know the half of it. Yes, I know that had I just opened up to you, to Holden, to Zach--hell, to Caleb, I wouldn't have run. But humans....We’re not meant to solve everything so precisely. And I’m really, truly sorry that I just left you in the dust but I didn't know what else to do.

[She exhales shakily, willing herself to stay collected in front of Sebastian.It works, for about a minute. And as a tear falls, she manages to get out more words.]

I didn't expect everything to be all hunky dory, nor did I ever expect to use that phrase ever in my life, but--again,  I’m sorry I left you with the brunt of the impact. And that’s really all I can say, because it’s pointless to make up excuses and this and that. It honestly wouldn't surprise me if both of you were done with me. I struggled with that on the train ride over here, but it’s--it’s one of the things my therapist said I had to be prepared for. So...I am.

[calebfuckingcurtis-blog]

[Caleb watches as Sydney turns to face him, still a little bit in shock. It was just so odd to see her after so long - especially to just run into her out of nowhere. A part of him was definitely a little relieved and pleased to see her - he’d missed her quite a lot - but part of him was also worried too. Of what would happen with the Kyles when they found out about Sydney returning, how Seb would react and what sort of things he’d say. Sebastian was very good at the cold-shoulder-make-you-feel-like-shit thing and even if he had a right to be mad Caleb knew that wouldn’t help out the situation all that much. 

He blinks out of his thoughts when he sees the emotion on Syd’s face, giving her a tiny smile of his own, brow still pinched a little.]

Heya, Syd. S’been a while, huh?

[sydneytrev]

[Why it’s so easy for her to tear up at the drop of a hat around Caleb, she doesn't know. But she’s watching him, her guard flying up as dark eyes land on dark eyes. She bends down cautiously, scooping up the keys before she’s standing again.]

Kinda.

[It’s a stupid attempt at humor, maybe a little sarcasm, but it’s all she’s got at the moment. All that’s running through her mind is the pain she’s inflicted on Zach and, indubitably, that was going to hit Sebastian. So she knows she’s in for some sort of trouble. And, oh, she hates that Caleb’s probably caught in the middle of it.] 

I didn't mean to hurt them. 

[Sydney squares her jaw, taking a half step forward and then backwards--she’s not sure what to do, doesn't know if words will ever be enough, because she’s fairly certain her departure’s going to be seen as an excuse, a cop-out. Which is funny, because she’s definitely not the type to take the easy route.]

[coffeeandlea]

[picturethisforever]

Visit Original Link

I Need You Tonight - Backstreet Boys

[sebkyle-blog]

[Seb purses his lips as he listens, nodding slowly and crossing his arms.]

You’re right. You did fuck up. And you probably don’t deserve to know, either. I mean, a fucking phone call, or a text, or anything might’ve helped. The way you were gone, you might as well have been dead. 

[He waves his hand dismissively.] But that’s all just hindsight. Right now it might be important to either give my brother a call or go to the apartment yourself and see, because there’s no way I’m relaying anything to you.

[sydneytrev]

[Sydney just snort of recoils, chewing harshly on her lower lip. Of course he’s right, and she feels a hell of a lot younger than she really is in that moment. She nods slowly, letting a soft breath fall from her lips.]

I don’t expect you to.

[Her words are soft, and despite being inside a building, she’s abnormally chilly. She debates asking about Zach--but again, it’s not really her place to.And she won’t give him any explanations--partly because they’ll sound like excuses and it’s abundantly clear that they won’t be worth a thing. Sydney can’t help but think that if this had happened a year ago, she would've been a little bit stronger. But now, she’s not so sure. She squares her jaw, clearing her throat and willing the stinging in the corners of her eyes to go away.] 

I--I should, um, get on that.

[faithfullyours-forever]

[calebfuckingcurtis-blog]

[Caleb pads up the stairs, eyes down on the phone in his hand, switching between texting his boyfriend and his uncle - talking baseball with one and what they were having for dinner with the other. He saunters along the landing once he reaches it, head lifting when he hears a curse. His eyes widen and his thick brows lift when his gaze lands on a familiar brunette, more than surprised to see the woman here.]

I… Syd?

[sydneytrev]

[She hears his voice, and it doesn't quite register at first. So the reaction is delayed. But the petite girl turns around, suddenly feeling a thousand times smaller as she comes face to face with Caleb. Swallowing back the tears, she forces a somewhat teary smile. She’s well aware that no matter how many times she says she’s all right, that everything’s all right--it isn't.]

Hi, Caleb.

[sebkyle-blog]

[Sebastian blinks at her dumbly for several moments, still really not conceiving that this is Sydney. He’s kind of angry in a way, but also a little relieved–maybe she can help him with Zach. But also, still angry.]

So… are you back for good, then? Or is this another flash in the pan?

[sydneytrev]

[And there’s that sting--the one that’s really only ever present in true Sebastian form. It hurts, but considering all the preparations she’s made, Sydney can actually take it.]

No, I’m done running. 

[She shoves her hands in her pockets, biting her lip] I fucked up, Sebastian. I did...what I saw so many other people do--you know, the kind of people in the movies you hate for running from their shit at the worst possible second. I didn't come back here for forgiveness. I’m not going to grovel or ask you to understand even a fraction of--well, any of it. I’m not going to fish out any excuses, because there are none. And I know that. 

[She pauses, forcing herself to swallow] I don’t even deserve to know how Zach’s doing, either. I don’t...I don’t know what to do, really.

[sebkyle-blog]

[Honestly, the last person Seb ever expected to see at this point was Sydney–she’d disappeared months ago, leaving her bakery in the hands of one of her assistants as well as leaving his brother; causing quite the downward spiral in Zach. Seb had been no stranger to taking the brunt of his brother’s lash-outs, but he couldn’t be too mad at him for it–Seb had done the same thing to him before, after all. Seb hung around Caleb’s more and didn’t see his brother often, which probably wasn’t very good for him either, but Seb was selfish and busy with schoolwork.

So, again, when Seb was walking back to Zach’s apartment to pick up some things to bring to Caleb’s, the last person he ever expected to see was Sydney. Yet there she was, fumbling with her keys, and Seb could only stare.]

Sydney?

[sydneytrev]

[Hearing Sebastian’s voice caused Sydney to flinch, and she dropped her keys altogether. On shaky limbs, she bent down carefully to scoop up her keys, turning ever so slightly to meet Sebastian’s gaze. Instead of trying another key, she stuffed the keys in her pocket and nodded slowly, biting on her lower lip. She was, of course, scared to come face to face with Zach--whenever that was-- but seeing Sebastian honestly scared her even more. He’d probably had to pick up all the pieces, and Sydney knew that just wasn’t fair at all.]

In the flesh. [She answered softly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.]

[leamedits]

[faithfullyours-forever]

[leamedits]

[faithfullyours-forever]