#{ohmygod.}

[boarmedicine]

i want to be normal abt him. i can't inspiration

[ellearts]

Bezz. Buzz. Bezz buzz study

Tagging the usual: @isacksteban @finn95o @lyslsstuff if you wanna be tagged bully me so I'll ad u!! ^^ I always forget people so sorry if I forgot someone

[n1hilsan]

i promise im normal but why do 5stars of ra*bits vs spri remind me of 5stars for obbligato..

i mean in a perspective (?) likeeee... hajime as meru and yume as tatsumi.

okay fine ill find the cards to show

JUST.LOOK...

tell me.im not going crazyplsolsplsplPLEASE

[teamnick]

[schneesisterss]

OH SHIT OH MY GOD

[notthesodaa]

NO.

i just saw a post about english jack and NO.

he’s IRISH.

ohmygod THINK

THINK FOR A SECOND AND DO NOT CHANGE HIM FROM IRISH TO ENGLISH OF ALL THINGS

of allllll the possible choices to change jack, an irish guy in 1899, too from irish ENGLISH is the one chosen

NO.

[kiochisato]

graphics are gonna be made last, why would you guys request graphics from me

[heartalter]

WARNING: HEAVY CONTENT FOUND BENEATH THE CUT.

cain was born into instability and hardship, he was raised in an environment that had been shaped by addiction, neglect, and trauma. his mother, nicole, became a parent at a very young age and struggled throughout much of her life with substance abuse, unhealthy relationships, and the overwhelming responsibility of raising four children. those children being: cain, skylar, alexander, and payton.

nicole was only fifteen years old whenever she gave birth to cain. by this point, she had already become heavily addicted to drugs, and drank alcohol more than she did water. she came from a family that cared for her. one that tried their best to help her! despite their efforts, she continued to runaway from home. continued to sneak off with the wrong groups of people, and became involved in things that she never should have. over and over again, olive branches were extended. it was nicole who never allowed herself the help.

her parents were determined to fight her for custody. she was unfit to raise a baby, and they did not believe their grandson would survive in her care. she did not care enough. all that she worried about was when she would get her next fix! not if her baby was alright, if he was in need of care... he could be screaming for hours, and she'd never bat an eye. his grandparents cared for him from infancy, until about three years old, whenever nicole decided that she would take him back. raise her son.

nicole struggled with addiction and frequently disappeared for long periods of time. she would go to town, or to friends houses for parties, or she would go out to sell, and there were times where she would take her children on said runs with her. cain became a caretaker for his younger siblings. a child raising other children. he often acted more like a parent than an older brother. trying his hardest to protect them, comfort them, and provide some sense of normalcy amid chaos. he did not wish for them to see, or experience, all that he had. their household was marked by poverty, neglect, and dangerous situations. strange men and women regularly came in and out of the home, some of them their mother knew, others were invited. this created an environment where the children rarely felt safe.

the family survived largely on food stamps. their mother often sending them to the gas station to buy quick meals, versus cooking for them. it was too time consuming. her boyfriend danny's children, on the other hand, were always well fed. their grandmother cooking only for them and never nicole's children. not even when their stomachs rumbled, and began to hurt due to lack of food. their mother never saw the issue in having her children eat from the gas station. never did she see an issue with sending a ten, eight, six, and four year old to the store on their own. walking railroad ties to avoid the main road. one of the most damaging figures in all of cain’s childhood was his former stepfather, danny. danny was both physically and emotionally abusive toward both cain and his younger brother, alexander. much of his anger was directed at the boys, and those close to the children often believed it stemmed from a need for control, dominance, or jealousy. whatever the reason, the abuse left lasting scars. following them over the years. haunting them, some would say!

cain was frequently beaten, insulted, and degraded by danny. he was called names, humiliated, and often became the target of violent outbursts. objects were thrown at him, and physical intimidation became a normal part of daily life. rather than feeling protected in his own home, cain learned to live in constant fear of setting someone off. walking on glass shards, never sure when one might shatter under foot. his carefulness never once protected him. still, he tried.

alexander experienced similar abuse at an even younger age. one of the most severe incidents occurred when alexander was only three years old, when danny broke his arm during an act of violence. rather than admitting what had happened, danny told the rest of the family that alexander had fallen from a slide at a park. one of the tall metal ones, that became too hot to slide down on beneath summer rays. alexander was too young to remember the event, thankfully... but always knew that his fear toward danny heightened after that day.

the effects of that abuse followed the children long after they escaped the household. for cain, especially, the violence deeply affected the way he experiences trust and connection with others. because physical touch was so often associated with fear, aggression, and pain during childhood, he now struggles with physical affection and being touched by others. he now flinches if someone touches him without warning, the movement is too fast, or they come up from behind him. he startles fairly easy. due to this, he has developed a habit of apologizing for the reaction. never wishing to offend.

nicole was not a loyal woman. apart from danny, she had two to three other men that she kept around. cycling through them day by day. if one was boring her, she would reach out to one of the others. kept them all wrapped around her fingers. none of the men knew of the others in her life. her children, on the other hand, knew everything. she would tell them to keep it a secret. this is their one secret with mommy, and she needed for them to protect it. because of their love for her, they never told. kept their lips sealed to protect her despite the fact that she never protected them.

despite everything, despite how she treated them, and left them behind... cain never fully gave up on his mother. much of his life was shaped by the hope that nicole might eventually change! that she would one day become the loving and dependable parent he needed her to be. he continued giving her chances because he wanted to believe she could recover, care for her children, and build a healthier family. that change never truly came. it left him disappointed, and somewhat broken. he had tried to be the one to never give up on her. after a point, there was nothing left to hold onto.

one night, things became heated at the house. danny continued to poke and prod. he was looking for a fight! boredom never suited him well, he always started searching for issues. cain was doing well with masking emotion. showing no signs of annoyance, nor discomfort. he was straight-faced. and so his attention shifted, his focus now on the younger brother. alexander. that is when cain had stepped in, telling him that he's a fucking child, and that he needed to back the fuck off. this only riled the man up further. of course, things became physical. whaling on cain, not relenting, punishing him for speaking up. cain had used a vase of roses, shattering it against his face. that was how he broke free from his clutches. danny, in a fit of rage, screamed out about how he would kill him. how they'd be better off.

cain left the household in order to save himself. jumping out of his two-story window, fracturing his ankle during the fall, but still taking off running. running aimlessly. he had no idea where he was heading! his feet hitting pavement hard, leading him to the one place that he would feel safe. the kaplan household. he has spoken about feeling intense guilt for leaving his siblings behind, but at the time, he believed staying would destroy him emotionally and mentally. even after leaving, the trauma of those years followed him. knowing that he left them, unable to return... he blames himself for all that had happened to them in his absence. the guilt sometimes threatening to consume him. a part of him knowing that he should've been there for them despite.

the siblings each carried the effects of their upbringing differently. skylar and payton, his younger sisters, experienced significant emotional trauma during their childhoods. payton moved out at thirteen, following in cain’s footsteps in an attempt to escape the environment at home. both girls struggled with the lasting impact of what they endured, though they have continued trying to rebuild their lives and move forward.

alexander, unfortunately, also grew up surrounded by instability and conflict. like his sisters, he experienced the long-term emotional effects of growing up in an unsafe and unpredictable home. the abuse that he had endured from their mother's boyfriends, their mother, and her friends causing him to snap. his anger issues became wildly out of control the further they went untreated. in frustration, he would often take out his anger on his younger sister, payton. payton grew a deep disdain for alexander, never wishing to see him again after she left.

today, the relationship between the siblings is complicated. there is love between them, but also distance created by years of trauma, pain, and survival. they still speak at times, though not as often as cain may wish. shared memories of their childhood can make reconnecting difficult. the moments that followed too much for them to share. the only sibling that cain is no longer in contact with is alexander. he tried, once... to get him to realize his ways were wrong, that he was going down the wrong path, but he was too far gone. cain remains deeply connected to his youngest sister, whom he practically helped raise from birth. she is much like a daughter to him sometimes.