When it comes to "such a raw line" sort of sentences you find on the internet, The Stupendium is one hell of a source for them. I keep being impressed by just how much one person can be exactly where they should be - I'm not kidding, this mf could make it as a poet, as a musician, on the stage performing Shakespeare, but instead they decided to use this impressive mashup of skills they have to rap about videogames. Yeah I shit you not, they actually pull it off. I don't listen to rap and I don't play videogames and this is good.
This one specific song had one line that made me think that it would make a really funny "live, laugh, love" -style saccharine wall sticker or framed unintelligble calligraphy poster, you know that type of decor I'm talking about. But then it struck me, hold on, that one would make a fucking hilarious cutesy grandma cottagecore cross stitch with flowers all around it. Then I decided that fuck it, I have to design that, I'm going to turn that into a cross stitch pattern.
And uh. Suddenly it's 10 pm. And instead of whatever else I could have done today, I made this:
Steddie au where they body swap. They're still in school and despise each other to death, always fighting and always at each other's neck for something. One day one one them says something along the lines of "you wouldn't last a second in my shoes" and that's that. The next day they wake up in the other's body, in his bed, in his clothes.
And here we have:
Eddie who was convinced that Steve had the perfect life, perfect home, perfect family who wakes up alone in a too-big-for-a-teenager house, with no one around. He tries to call for an eventual mother or an eventual father but nothing. So he goes down the stairs to find a living room so pristine that it almost belongs in a magazine. He finds himself in the kitchen and tries to find something to eat. Nothing, apart from a almost finished carton of milk and two cans of beer in the fridge, and some dry bread in the cupboard the kitchen is totally empty of food. He looks around and sees a note attached on the fridge, went unseen before, that read "note to self: remember to go groceries shopping!!". So there's that.
I also thought about how Eddie would react when finally a week later Steve's parents come back from their two months trip to France or something and start being insufferable. I also imagine that Eddie couldn't keep up with everything that Steve usually does at the house (keeping up with the pool, the lawn and general cleaning of the house) (not to say that Eddie doesn't know how to clean but come on, that boy is messy as fuck and probably ADHD, I can't have him remembering to clean the fridge or something) and being berated by Steve's father about it. Shouting in the face, hitting the walls, "I wish you were never born" type of thing yk. And and and then Steve's mother- beautiful woman who always seems to have a glass of wine in hand who can't help herself with saying stuff like "dear aren't you gaining a little too much weight? You know you're supposed to be on a diet, love" and Eddie can't believe what the fuck is happing.
Maybe Harrington's life isn't so perfect.
If you have read something like this pls share, love you❤️❤️
Buck doesn’t let his jealousy get the better of him, doesn’t body check Eddie at the basket ball match, Tommy doesn’t go over to his apartment, there is no kiss, Tommy does not ask Buck out on a date.
What happens instead is this:
Tommy becomes an honorary 118 member, starts hanging out more and more with everyone from 118. By extension, Tommy starts spending more and more time around Buck. Tommy finds it very inconvenient when he starts crushing on a supposedly straight Buck (Tommy tries to resist but that resistance crumbles every time Buck smiles at him).
Queue Tommy secretly pining over Buck, and sighing longingly whenever he catches a glimpse of Buck.
Now in my mind, Tommy and Chimney remained pretty close after Tommy left, close enough for Tommy to drop everything the moment Chim calls to steal a helicopter. Chim also undoubtebly knows about Tommy’s sexuality.
This means that Chim is witness to Tommy’s pathetic pining. This also means that Chim is there to catch Tommy spending far too much time looking longingly at Buck’s various assets.
“Buck’s going to remain straight no matter how long you stare at his ass,” Chim reminds Tommy. This is not the first time Chim has had to remind Tommy of this.
Tommy sighs despondently, “I know. Doesn’t mean I can’t admire the view.”
“This wouldn’t be nearly as difficult if Evan didn’t have both gorgeous looks and gorgeous personality,” Tommy says one night at a bar. Being a good friend, Chim has started taking Tommy out whenever Buck’s straightness becomes too much for Tommy to bear.
“He’s just so adorable,” Tommy continues.
“I know, buddy,” Chim says, patting Tommy on the back (Chim has also had to pat Tommy on the back a lot as of late).
“Are we sure Evan’s straight?” Tommy asks after the first beer.
Chim, with absolute certainty, says “Yes, now get over yourself, you sad, sad man.” And then Chim buys Tommy another beer because he’s a good friend.
And because Chim is such an amazing friend, Chim can’t help but pay attention whenever Buck and Tommy interact, mostly to make sure Tommy doesn’t make too much of a fool of himself.
Which means he’s also watching Buck, and he’s watching Buck watch Tommy.
And that’s when the doubt creeps in.
Chim’s known Buck for a few years now, has seen what Buck is like around women he’s attracted to, knows what Buck’s pining face looks like.
And he’s seeing that face now whenever Buck looks over at Tommy.
At first Chim doesn’t believe his eyes, figuring that listening to Tommy compliment every single aspect of Buck from his eyelashes to his laugh has corrupted Chim’s brain, making Chim see things that aren’t there.
Because Buck’s straight.
Right?
The more Chim watches, the less he’s sure. Because there’s Buck being somehow both endearingly awkward and seamlessly smooth around Tommy. There’s Buck spending way to long gazing into Tommy’s eyes, and staring at Tommy whenever Tommy’s not looking. There’s Buck zeroing in on Tommy every time Tommy enters the room; There’s Buck holding onto every word coming out Tommy’s mouth. There’s Buck laughing at every one of Tommy’s jokes (and, sure, Tommy’s a funny guy with a real dry sense of humour, but he’s not that funny).
If Chimney didn’t know any better, he would say that Tommy’s not the only one who’s got a crush.
All signs are pointing to Buck wanting to hold Tommy’s hand, go on romantic walks along the beach with Tommy, as well as do more than PG13 things to Tommy.
Does Tommy actually stand a chance?
Chim doesn’t want to get Tommy’s hopes up straight away. He needs to make sure that his hunch is correct. He needs to gather more data.
So Chim starts inviting Buck and Tommy everywhere he can think of, and then pretends to take a really long time in the bathroom so that Buck and Tommy can have some alone time while Chim is hiding behind a bush or a potted plant depending on the location, spying on them.
Tommy, because he’s a very observant person, notices Chim in the bush with binoculars pointed at where Tommy and Buck are seated, and confronts Chimney after Buck has gone home.
And Chim can’t keep a secret for shit, so of course he tells Tommy about his doubtS even though he really doesn't want to disappoint Tommy if it turns out that his hunch is wrong.
“I’ll keep investigating,” Chimney says, once again patting Tommy on the back, watching hope bloom on Tommy’s face.
Chim continues inviting Tommy and Buck to hang out, sometimes inviting others as well to avoid suspicion (Buck isn’t suspicious at all, but Hen has start narrowing her eyes at Chimney).
Tommy calls it torture, Chim call it science. Oblivious Buck is just concerned about the amount of time Chim spends in the bathroom. He asks Chimney if Chim’s having any any bowel problems. Chimney insists he doesn’t, but Buck figures Chim’s either putting on a brave face or is too embarrassed. Buck doesn’t bring it up again, but he does leaves some pamplets regarding bowel problems and their causes in Chim’s locker as well as sends Chim links to various medical websites.
Chim is mortified. Tommy finds it hilarious. Chim decides to attempt a different approach.
To try and throw Hen off the sent and to further advance his research, he gets Karen to drag them all to a gay bar to see how Buck reacts around other queer men (Karen is very amiable once Chim tells her of his suspicions; she always enjoys gossip).
Chim and Karen sit opposite Tommy and Buck, the better to observe them. Eddie, poor confused Eddie had to be discretely elbowed aside when he tried to sit next to Buck, and has been dragged next to Karen, supposedly so that Karen can arrange a play-date between Christoper, Denny and Mara. Though Karen is paying much more attention to Buck’s every micro-expressions than any word coming out of Eddie’s mouth.
Unfortunately, the gay club is a bust because Buck’s too busy learning about monster trucks from Tommy to pay attention to any other attractive man at in the bar. It’s hard to tell if Buck’s attention is due to an attraction to Tommy or if he’s just really interested in soaking up new information in that spongy brain of his.
Chim starts leaving queer memoirs scattered around the fire station (Karen gives excellent book recommendations).
Chim starts commenting on attractive men they see on the tele when it’s a particularly slow day at the station. He does this to such an extent that some of the members of B shift are wondering if Chim’s the one with a case of latent bisexuality. That thought is strengthened in their minds when Chimney starts bringing some those magazines with the romance quizzes in them: ‘Best guy for you’; ‘Your ideal guy’; ‘What your celebrity crushes say about your love life’; ‘Take this quiz to reveal your partner’s star sign’; etc.
Then Chim very loudly goes on about how gay and single Tommy is whenever Buck is in earshot (and now some of B shift think Chim’s planning on leaving Maddie for Tommy).
The first time Chim brings up how gay and single Tommy is, Tommy takes him aside to ask him what the hell that was about.
Chim says in response, “Listen, if Buck isn’t 100% straight, he needs to be aware that you’re on the market so that he doesn’t go check out all the other male fish in the sea.”
Buck doesn’t make a big deal out of Tommy being gay, acts his usual self. Though he does manage to slip into conversation that he’s an ally. And when Buck does that, Tommy feel his hope to one day hold Buck’s hand during a romantic sunset walk along the beach shrivels up a little inside him. Chim gives Tommy yet another commiserating pat on the back, and takes Tommy to a bar later that night so that Tommy can drink his problems away.
Meanwhile, Buck knows that Tommy being gay isn’t a big deal, but for some reason Buck can’t stop thinking about it.
It’s not like he’s ever had a problem with anyone’s sexuality before, so what is it about Tommy?
And representation really does matter. Here Buck is, being confronted with a Man, a big, muscular man like himself, who enjoys going to the gym like himself, who’s in a similar profession to him. And this man is gay.
And that’s going to cause something in his mind to shift. Maybe he doesn’t notice that shift at first, maybe it’s only subconsciously.
Maybe he’s going to start picking up a few of those memoirs that Chim’s been leaving around; Buck’s always been fond of non-fiction after all.
Maybe he’s going to ask Hen and Karen about their experiences figuring out their sexuality, their coming out stories (during this conversation, Karen will be staring intently at Buck, looking for any signs of the queer thoughts Buck may or may not be having).
(Chim is very happy with this because pointedly asking Hen and Karen about their queer experience was next on his game plan.)
Buck doesn’t ask Tommy about his sexuality though, not yet at least. Buck can’t seem to bring himself to ask Tommy. Though he doesn’t know why.
Then Buck does as Buck does best and goes on a research binge about all the different sexualities, but more specifically bisexuality (I imagine there is at least one sexuality quiz during that research binge).
And, at the end of that research binge, the results are conclusive. Buck is bisexual. Maybe he says that out loud in his empty apartment “I am bisexual” and it feels right and it feels so very exciting.
Once he realises that he’s bisexual, a lot of things start making sense. Including Tommy’s ass. Tommy’s very fine ass that Buck can’t help but stare at. And Tommy’s eyes. And Tommy’s hands as well. And Tommy’s laugh; And definitely Tommy’s smile. Basically all of Tommy.
Buck keeps his newly discovered sexuality to himself for a bit, wanting some time to himself to live in this new reality of his, basking in this new part of himself.
Also so that he can spend a few days staring at attractive guys without any knowing looks from his loved ones.
Turns out he spends most of those few days staring at Tommy which, again, makes sense.
Because he is such an open book, it doesn’t take Buck long to come out.
He decides to tell everyone at the next get-together. They’re all outside, having another barbecue at Bobby’s and Athena’s. Tommy is also present for this.
Everyone is of course supportive and happy for Buck. Chim is forcing himself to stay still, even though he really wants to jump up and down, high-five Karen, high-five Tommy, and then shove Tommy in Buck’s lap.
Meanwhile, Tommy is in his chair, having a deer-in-the headlights moment, staring up at Buck, wide-eyed, slightly pale, a forkful of potato salad halfway to his mouth. Tommy is so frozen that Chim has to nudge him so that his fork continues its journey to his mouth.
Tommy chews on the potatoes mechanically, no longer paying attention to the delicious taste that he’d been previously enjoying, too busy trying to act normal and trying to rein in his growing hope. By Chim’s side-eyes, Tommy isn’t doing a great job.
As the night goes on, Tommy forces himself to not approach Buck no matter how much he wants to, mostly because has forgotten how to act like a normal human being.
But then Buck is right there, in front of him.
“Hey,” Buck says.
“Hi,” Tommy replies. So far so good.
Buck is looking at him, and Tommy is trying to remember what he’s meant to do with his hands.
“Congratulations,” Tommy forces out because congratulations are definitely in order, “How are you feeling?” He asks, genuinely curious.
“Good,” Buck says in that sincere way that comes so naturally to him.
“Yeah?
“Yeah, great. I feel, I don’t know, lighter I guess. I mean, I’m still me, but now I know why I spend so much time staring at men’s asses.”
Tommy snorts, “Yeah, I know the feeling.”
There’s a pause. Buck’s staring at Tommy, and Tommy’s staring at Buck, and neither want to look away.
“Hey,” Buck finally says, “tell me if I’m completely off base, but there’s this little Italian restaurant I’ve been meaning to try, and I was wondering if you’d want to come with me.” Buck stops, swallows. Tommy watches his adam’s apple move. Buck continues “Like, as a date.”
Tommy forces his eyes back up away from Buck’s neck.
“A date?” Tommy repeats, the hope inside him soaring.
“Yeah.”
“Okay,” Tommy says, smiling, not sure if he can believe what he’s hearing.
“Okay,” Buck says, smiling back. It’s a smile so soft that Tommy wants to trace it with his fingers, but they’re definitely not there yet and Tommy’s trying to act normal.
“Okay,” Buck repeats a little breathlessly, that soft smile still in place.
(During this whole interaction, Chimney is hiding in a bush, binoculars in hand. Karen is at his side, asking him what they’re saying.
“I can’t read lips!” Chim says, though he tries anyway with mixed results.
But then, Hen comes along and puts a stop to it, dragging Chim and Karen out of the bush and confiscating Chim’s binoculars.)
