Hell followed with us has taken over my brain. I want a beaded lizard so bad. The autistic rep in this book was a little too relatable in some places, it made me realize that I have infact gone non-verbal before. Also the religious traumaš«. I didn't grow up in the same church in the book but its also a high demand Christian church.
I need to shove this book in everyone's face. It was on my to read list for almost a year before my friend told me to actually read jt.
Im.about to annotate my copy so much, mostly just highlighting my favorite parts. I'm so exited for Andrew Joseph White's next book to come out.
my dad made me watch tucker and dale vs evil last night and holy shit itās one the best films iāve ever seen, definitely my fav horror film. itās fuckin hilarious and insanely gory and i love it sm. dale is super sweet but i fuckin adore tucker. āhi-de-ho officer, weāve had a doozy of a day!ā
I want something angsty so, Yandere Ekko reaction/scenario when his darling gets deeply wounded trying to protect him?
tw. graphic descriptions of gore, blood, and death, implied insanity.
Ekko
Time was always at his fingertips, but that never made the things heād seen hurt any less. He shouldāve been used to it, he reasoned ā used to seeing the blood and guts of his friends splayed across the floor, used to the terror and adrenaline pumping through his veins with such fervor he thought theyād burst, used to the screams and cries of his most beloved friends ā of his sweetest darling.
It didnāt take a genius to realize heād never get used to it. That was the problem with rewinding time ā at some point, you get so reckless that trouble is always around the corner. Thereās always something new, always something that pops up whenever heād rewind. Sometimes itās a trap that wasnāt there before, other times, itās an entirely different enemy ā the universeās way of ensuring harmony.Ā
Time came with consequences and paradoxes. He didnāt want you involved too, but fate doesnāt work that way. Not when you fuck with it on the daily.
He knew it was coming. He knew youād get so irreparably hurt one day that itād break him. He could rewind time all he wants, but heād never got that image out of his head: blood pooling around your body, your screams that had echoed throughout the city only to die on your lips when blood coagulated in your throat, the fear in your eyes knowing that death was on its way.
Ekko had never felt so scared in his life.
He watched you die in his arms. He shouldnāt have ā he should have rewound eons ago, but his limbs felt like lead. Seeing you so vulnerable, seeing you wait for death to claim you as he helplessly held youā¦ it made him realize how fleeting life was.
He rewound, desperation in his step and death in his sights. Youād die one day anyway, he realized. Death was inevitable, just like time never stopped. Youād die and Ekko couldnāt do anything to stop it ā except rewind time. Rewind for eternity, rewind until heās grown sick of seeing the same thing over and over, until heās grown sick of living.
TheĀ āDefectiveā Courser: X4-44. A bit of his story under the cut.
X4-44 is a serious looking synth, but with a soft heart.
~~~
With outstanding techniques, splendid way of thinking and great battle skills, Courser X4-44 had made his way into the Scientistās expectations, truly one of the promising Coursers the Institute had made.
When he had his last training, every Scientist was shivering in excitement on how he would handle being outside the Commonwealth. Eventually, briefing him on his first mission; Retrieve a loose Gen 3 synth.
~~~
āHe is defective!ā Furious and angry, was the first words X4 had heard when he came back... Without the targeted synth.Ā āPut this junk back and reprogram āem! Now!ā
The mission was clearly a failure... There were blood all over him. It wasnāt his, but the synthās.
āIt was... Terrible...ā He thought to himself as he made his way to the Robotics room, together with the Scientists assigned to reprogram him.Ā āWill this be... The same? Over... And over again?ā
He should have known from the start, but he never imagined it would be thisĀ physically and mentally devastating.
~~~
Reset, reprogrammed and trained again, leaving the memories of his failed missions, maybe he might learn from that, the Scientists thought.
āWhy bring the synths back if things like these happen in the Institute? Programmed, noĀ free will, even slaves.āĀ X4 ends up just taking their lives... With the regrets of not saving instead, haunted him. He canāt let himself do this anymore. This is torture!
As he was sent out again and again, he decided to change tactics; Save hisĀ targets as much as possible,Ā place them some place where he thought is safe.
But the scientists are tricky. The moment he was being reprogrammed, they watched the things he saw, learning where he was taking the synths.
When he was sent out again. he discovered that some of the synths he managed to save were taken back, some are dead... It crushed his synthetic heart.
After all of that happened, he decided to work for the Institute with grief.
One of his retrieval mission was to hunt down Ethsbert. He found this synth very unusual so he watched him very carefully and learned, Ethsbert can be the answer to his burden.
======
I am so sorry. x///x Really terrible with telling stories...
Headcanons or Concept for Eu-Jin: His darling gets lost in, say, a national park or other large wooded area for about a week. She's barely surviving thus far, and is weakening considerably. She fears she's going to die, perhaps in as little as a day, and so is extremely relieved (maybe even happy) when Eu-Jin finds her.
tw. mentions of gore and death.
Normally, he would take advantage of this lost human and seduce her to steal their life-force ā likely killing her afterward and leaving her remains scattered across the forest floors.
However, Iāll answer this assuming Eu-jin has already met, and fallen for, his darling prior to her getting lost. She needs to gain his trust before he would ever lift a finger to help a human.Ā
Now, Eu-jin would drive himself crazy once heās learned that his beloved is lost, likely vulnerable and confused as to why he left her to fend for herself. It wasnāt his intention at all! He looked away for a few moments, and somehow, he lost her just like that. Heāll grow restless, scouring every inch of the city and its surroundings in pursuit of his darling. His sense of smell is diluted while in the city, so finding her is no easy task as is.
When he finally finds her, heās so relieved, all dark thoughts leaving his mind. He didnāt want to give up on searching for her, but heās been through the same heartache before ā losing his original owner, his beloved, only to find her corpse, long forgotten and rotting. Words cannot describe how happy he is to see his darling has not met the same fate. Eu-jin would immediately sweep his darling up and take her home, ushering sweet nothings and promises to take care of her ā to never let her be alone, or out of his sight, again.
If she were to die ā if he were to lose the second human heās ever lovedĀ ā he would rather die too.
hello ! sorry to bother you but could i get a pronoun check for melanie with he/it/gore ?
i like rhythm games, listening to music and dead by daylight ! (if that isnt enough info the default check is fine ! /gen)
Ayyyy! Its Melanie! He's so cool, I hope it knows that! I love gore's name, and his pronouns? Man, it has really cool taste doesn't gore?
He likes rythm games! That's very cool of it, I hope gore knows that! I'm not entirely sure what they are, so I'll be sure to ask him later! Maybe it would show me some examples of it? I'll ask gore!
He also likes listening to music by Dead Daylight! I've never listened to that before, maybe it would tell me gores favorite song? Ooh maybe he would listen to some with me! it's so cool, I trust gores music taste!
Anyway! I hope he has a great day and that it takes care of goreself!
