180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us episode 5 analysis
In: You don't like to drink. Your dad didn't like to drink either. Wang: That's what I don't understand. All my life I've known him to be an alcoholic. He even died because of alcohol. In: Somehow, I'm not over that
Wang has only known his dad as an alcoholic, and probably was told so by the people around him. However In knows the truth. Siam, much like Wang, disliked alcohol. He wasn’t killed by alcohol like Wang was told. The truth that In knows is so visible in this scene. He’s in such emotional pain.
He says "I'm not over that". While, no, In cannot be solely blamed for Siam's death, it is true that by pushing Siam away towards Mol that caused Siam to drink. Not bc he liked it, but because he was in that much pain. Probably similar to how In is now.
In: He said "We can do it". "I will always be there for you." ... From him, I learned how a line can be important. With strength, accuracy, confidence, and purpose, he taught me how to draw. A single line can turn into a platform or a wall or even a bridge to cross over. Wang: And in the end, you managed to cross over that bridge.
This is one of the few times you can see Inn with this kind of happiness. You can tell he absolutely adored and treasured Siam. Not just as someone who he had a crush on, but someone he genuinely respected. Siam is an incredibly influential figure in In's life even outside of attraction. Which is why everything is so much more painful.
Might be reading in too much or incorrectly, but, if we can agree that the bridge represents gay love, and Siam taught him the tools to build one, then it’s like Siam is the one who showed him gay love, aka, In’s gay awakening. Wang says that eventually In managed to cross that bridge. It's like Wang is trying to help In accept his sexuality.
These lines also fuel the continuing theme of lines. Lines can be used to create boundaries (aka, that philosophical "dateline" the show is about), but also good things like platforms and bridges. We could view "lines" in this case as actions or choices. One can choose to create walls or distance yourself, but you can also choose to create community and proper communication.
This is probably nothing, but right after Wang gives In a stack of photos of him and Siam (also acted by Pond), the phone rings. In tells him to answer it with a smile on his face. A different reaction to when In was avoiding Siam's calls.
Wang: What happened when you and Dad met Mom? In: Your mom fell in love with your Dad. Wang: But did dad fall for her? In: He wasn't one to show his feelings Wang: But you said you guys shared secrets In: I said I shared mine. Wang: But what about dad? In: I thought I knew what he was thinking. I thought he went to the rehearsal with me because he fell for her. Wang: He told you that himself?
From this it makes you think that Inn did know that Siam didn’t like Mol, at least not in the romantic sense. It seems he convinced himself to believe that there was no way that Siam could like him too. That he obviously was there for Mol. Now after everything that's happened he can't convince himself anymore bc the truth has already come out. However he also doesn't want to admit it. So he's still lying. Wang sees through it and questions him insistently. *Cue thunder in the background*
I do think that Wang already knew something was up with his dad and In from before this meeting. Now that he's here he's basically confirmed it.
Wang: Mom said you were her matchmaker. Her bridge In: Sasiwimol was sure of her feelings and she was a real risk taker. She had feelings for Siam and wasn't afraid to let him know. Wang: That sounds exactly like mom. She always gets what she wants. In: No one dares to resist her.
Once again “bridge” is being used to reference a path to love. Mol, unlike In and probably due to the fact that she’s straight, easily showed her attraction to Siam. In says that nobody dared to resist her, though it was probably just In (and I guess sort of Siam, but less so) that failed to stop her. So In told Siam to date Mol despite knowing that he didn’t love her. Siam, wanting to please In (plus societal pressures) gave in and dated her.
Maybe this is another "the bridge and forest is not for me, it's for other people" kind of thing from In. Straight people can love happily, but not me.
Wang: So you told dad to go out with her In: Well, they were perfect for each other Wang: Was that really the reason? In: Siam was my dear brother. Sasiwimol was also my best friend. They loved each other. Of course I wanted them to be together. To have a perfect life together Wang: But was that the real reason? In: They loved each other Wang: Who told you that? In: Sasiwimol Wang: What about dad? You heard from his lips? In: Well, I wanted them to be together Wang: And what did you do? In: I stepped back Wang: And the group was no longer three
Idk if he's been doing this (probably), but Wang calls his mother "khun Sasiwimol" here. Certainly an interesting choice. Also this scene really shows how much Wang likes to argue? Particularly when he knows he's right lmao.
In says that Mol and Siam were his best friends and that they “loved each other” so that was the reason. He is of course hiding the fact that he knew Siam didn’t like Mol. They were perfect for each other only because it’d be a straight couple whereas In and Siam would be a gay couple. It’s not that they were a good match, it was because In didn’t want Siam to be in a gay relationship. He projected his own fears and insecurities onto Siam. He also probably couldn’t handle the fact that he couldn’t be with Siam. So he pushed Siam onto Mol since he knew she liked him, and at least they were friends. He wanted the stereotyped ideal straight relationship and life for Siam since In had decided such a thing was not for him. Of course, Siam isn’t straight and thus the perfect life In envisioned was a fantasy.
In said he "stepped back", which implies that he was in the way. If he was just a friend, why and how could he be in the way? Especially since he was supposedly close to both of them. So even then, there was some flavor of attraction and tension between him and Siam that they might've been aware of and didn't act on.
Wang: So you decided to hang out alone? In: No Wang: You had a girlfriend? In: It's normal for a man to have one Wang: But the Great Sasiwimol didn't know that? In: I didn't have to tell her Wang: Did dad know? In: Of course. Rosalin. She went to our junior-senior high school. She went to the university in our hometown Wang: So it was a long-distance relationship? In: But I saw her every weekend Wang: You wanted this to be alone together ... Wang: Was she pretty? In: Who? Wang: Rosalin? Right? Is her name Rosalin?
So In had a girlfriend, apparently. Though when asked if he had had one, he responded that it was normal to have one (as opposed to not having one/being gay). He doesn’t seem to care much about her though. He never told Mol despite her being his best friend, and the girlfriend lived far away. Convenient for a fake relationship. Wang certainly doesn’t believe that In actually had a girlfriend, at least not one In seriously loved.
In either wasn't dating anyone, or was begrudgingly dating some random woman he knew. Particularly one that he would rarely have to see. Siam knew though, but not Mol. If we are to believe his words since there's no way to prove that Siam new of it. There isn't much reason to lie about it though. Assuming In isn't lying (entirely) about this, I'm gonna take a guess. In didn't tell Mol bc there was no reason to and she's probably just be annoying about it. In did tell Siam about it however to further push Siam into dating Mol. In turned himself into a person who was both straight and taken.
In: Yes. ... She was a reserved woman whose charm rivaled a cold breeze Wang: She sounds nice. Why did you guys break up? In: Because I wanted to live in the ocean where no one could find me. Wang: When did you guys break up? In: A long time ago. Wang: Before or after dad married mom? In: After Wang: Was she upset? In: Who? Wang: Rosalin. Right? Is her name Rosalin?
In doesn't seem to particularly care for Rosalin as a girlfriend considering how she talks about her. Since he broke up with her after Siam got married I'm gonna guess that he was basically waiting until he (and Mol) trapped Siam in marriage. Then almost immediately broke up with Rosalin.
In said that he broke up with his girlfriend because he wanted to live alone by the ocean. Which is basically what he did to Siam and Mol. He couldn’t handle his feelings for Siam (and then the guilt he felt), so he isolated himself.
In: Of course she was upset. At the time all I could do was hope she'd recover one day. I wanted her to meet someone better and start a family together Wang: You're saying it as if you were bad news for her? In: That would be an understatement. Your uncle Inthawut isn't a good person. .... I didn't know it would end that way. You know.. I never once forgave myself for what happened. Wang: What happened after dad married mom? In: All I know was it didn't go as planned. They didn't get their happy ending Wang: So this is what's been bothering you
And he switched to talking about Siam. Wang locks on to the right assumption that In was talking about Siam so he moves the conversation back to his dad.
In didn’t think he was good enough for Siam. He didn’t think their relationship would be right and would cause both of them trouble. In likely was focusing on the hate Siam would get since Siam was popular. He just hoped that Siam would understand and forgive him one day.
Unfortunately his planned backfired (bc of course it would) and he regrets it with his entire being. He considers himself a horrible person for it. Added fuel to the fire of his self hate.
In: Did you come here on purpose? Wang: It was fate In: I'm sorry.. I'm sorry Wang: Dad wouldn't blame you for it. Neither do I In: I'm sorry. I'm sorry I hurt you guys Wang: You only did it out of your love for dad In: Love isn't the right word. It was worship. I looked up to him in everyway. Wang: I know. Dad loved you too In: His voice. I can still hear his voice. "I.." "I will always be there for you". Despite that, I left him. It was me who left him Wang: I too will always be there for you
This scene is so intense, but this part in particular. This is likely the first time he's ever spoken about this topic to anyone. He has so much built up regret from the past. Siam's voice has been haunting him all these years. Like I said, Siam is more than just someone he happened to like. He was In's everything. Someone he loved so desperately. Yet In betrayed him.
We get a bit of Siam/Wang parallel stuff here. In saying Siam's voice is haunting him. Metaphorically of course, but also Wang probably sounds just like Siam to a horrifying degree. And then Wang says "I will always be there for you too" while leaning ever closer to In.
Wang: I thought you'd prefer it to be quiet. Bc it's quiet in the ocean. No one can find you there. In: For some things, it's up to us how we want them to be. Wang: Same goes with a line. It's up to us whether to draw it or not. In: Or whether to connect it to another line. I've seen you've drawn that line. Wang: And are you ok with that? In: Am I ok with what? Wang: The fact that I drew that line and followed it here In: Yes Wang: How do you feel about it? In: I feel like the clock has turned back. I feel like it has turned back decades. And that I'm now with someone from my past. Wang: Dad, right? In: I feel like he's here with me. And while I know it's not him, it nevertheless feels like him. Wang: Dad never left us In: What about you Wang? How do you feel about all of this? Wang: I feel like that dad I've been longing for, he isn't with you. He isn't out there either, but he's actually here inside me.
[Specifically about the bit leading up to the above conversation]
The long pauses of silence, the stiffness of their sentences/voices, In’s awkwardness. This was all done so well. It’s like In is slowly allowing Wang to come into his world. He’s also slowly realizing/accepting that he does feel something for Wang. What that something is is up for debate, but it's something.
He knows what sleeping in the same bed signifies for both of them. As Wang heads towards the bed the music picks up pace/becomes louder. Wang slowly walks over. There’s a lot of thinking involved here. This isn’t two friends casually sharing a bed. If it was, it would’ve been easier to ask and Wang would’ve walked over faster and slipped under the covers.
As I stated previously, lines are metaphors for actions here. You can create boundaries with people, but you can also connect with them, as In says. In says that he knows Wang came here on purpose. At least he knows that Wang is purposefully trying to get close to him. To translate, Wang is asking if it's ok that he likes him/trying to get close to him. I suppose both in the platonic and romantic sense.
I feel like there is a difference between how they view this relationship, whatever it is. Wang seems to have some level of actual physical/romantic attraction towards In, coupled with his desire to connect more with his deceased father (and In is his only way). In, however, seems to only really view Wang as a connection to Siam. Consciously In treats Wang as Wang and would never purposefully pretend Wang is Siam. As he said, it's like he's gone back in time and is with Siam, even thought it's not him. Wang is SO much like Siam in every way that In's unconscious is almost slipping.
I personally believe that most if not everything In feels for Wang is his yearning and guilt for Siam. I mean think about it. He's been living offgrid depressed for at least a decade. Haunted by the death of his most important person that he believes he killed (accidentally). And then all of the sudden that person's son who is basically Siam reincarnated shows up unannounced. That has to fuck with his mind.
Towards the end of that conversation Wang says that the father he was looking for was inside of him. He's realized that he's way more like his father than he initially realized. Which is great and love that bit of closure for him. But also it kind of feels like he's taking on the aura/personality/soul/etc of his father?? Or he's accepting his father into him. Both in a wholesome "he's always with me" and "I am my own connection to my father" way and in the kinda crazy psychological way bc you have In right there who is saying that Wang reminds him of Siam a little too much.
Wang: It was a new feeling. It's hard to explain. It felt like a discovery but it was invisible. A fulfilment, but it was empty. A feeling of loneliness but it was warm. And before I drifted into unconsciousness, I felt like we had gotten closer, but we couldn't touch each other just yet. It was like a thin wall that is separating you from the answer to your mystery. The answer I was looking for. Now I know where it is. It's next to me, and inside me.
Partially talking about his want to connect more with his father. But more than that. Some kind of self discovery. Now whether isn't only personal character growth or his sexuality, I don't know. Probably both. Or maybe this just serves as a confirmation.
Following this scene is a collage of bits of their day. I'm not going to screenshot or quote. However I do want to say that In seems a lot more comfortable with Wang being close to him in these scenes. Maybe out of necessity since he's injured, but also probably bc of their chat the night before.
Wang also took on a more nurturing role, similar to what I guess Siam was like with In? Though In himself is still the more experienced person.
According to wikipedia Symposium is about a bunch of guys at some banquet making speeches to praise Eros. They talk about different forms of love, different ways its shown. Various philosophical thoughts about platonic/romantic/sexual love. Also vulgar/lust vs heavenly love.
Wang: I don't mind reasonable adults. In: The problem is they all think they're reasonable. Same goes with you kids. Am I right? Wang: I admit. Sometimes kids can be hot-headed, but that only happens when the adults are being unreasonable. In: So you're saying it's ok to retaliate? How is that reasonable? Wang: Because two people of different beliefs and ages think differently. In: And that makes it ok to resolve it through a fight?
One of the main themes of the show. Adults think they're better and always right simply because they've lived longer. They think that simply by being older they get free authority to tell the younger folks what to do and think. At the same time, it's not like kids/young people are without fault. Stubborn and unwilling to listen calmly. If both sides are reasonable, then all is good and there can be communication. However if either is unreasonable, then there's no hope.
In: Wang, do you have a best friend? Wang: Why do you ask? Of course i do. Do I look like I don't have one? (In: no I mean..) No, I don't. You're right. I don't have a best friend. In: What about a gf (*think he used gender neutral faen here). You told me you were seeing someone. Wang: Yes, but I don't know if we were ever a thing. In: You two met in college? Tell me about her (*idk about gendered pronouns or if that was added in subs). Wang: No. We met at boarding school. When I was sent there, I was a crybaby. I was one of the smallest kids. I became a target for the big kids. They pointed at me and laughed. I had no one by my side. And then I grew up and learned how to defend myself. I stopped crying and started to fight back. If he laid a hand on me, whether he was bigger or older, I'd fight him. In the end, they stopped bothering me. And my peaceful days began right after. One day a new kid transferred there. His family was going through a tough time. There was no one to look after him every day, hence the boarding school. He was delicate. Fragile. Both emotionally and physically. Students, no matter what year they were in, started to pick on him. They called him the c-word. "You faggot". "Your parents sent you here for anal sex?" It was painful. It was cruel. They thought they were big in number so they could do anything to him. To them anyone who was different was not right in the head and deserves to be punished. When in truth, what they did was only a facade to hide their own cowardice. Not everyone was mean to him. But some kids, including some teachers, just laughed it off as if it was normal to get picked on. They said "don't bully him" "he's a nice kid". I couldn't stand them. They told the bullies not to bully him because he was a nice kid instead of calling them out on their bullying and ugly hearts. The rest of the school ignored what was happening. No one should go through what he did. No one should be treated as less than. That's why I approached him and decided to be his friend. I did it because he deserved it. The reason was innocent. After that, those bullies stopped coming for him, but even then I could still see contempt. In their eyes, their smirks, the way they talked. That's when I realized some people would never see us as their equals. I'm glad I befriended him. In a world that's filled with hatred and judgement, I was able to make life a little more tolerable for him.
We learn a lot about Wang through his monologue. We learn that he doesn't really have any close friends. We also learn that he's had only one relationship, and it was more of a situationship than anything. The force behind a lot of his anger is also revealed here. He was sent to boarding school (mentioned before briefly), probably after his dad died. There he was bullied until he managed to get strong enough to not be bullied. He was probably very aware of the fact that it's not that people got better, it's that he had to change himself to someone who couldn't be bullied. Not everyone can do that, and nobody should have to.
Wang has seen how shitty people can be to (sexual) minorities and I think that transfers a lot to why he's so stubborn about getting In to open up more.
Wang’s story has such parallels to In’s story. In was also a new student who was small, weak, and alone, bullied by everyone. People wouldn’t help him. Not until Siam met him. Yet again, Siam = Wang. So then, in this story, is In the kid that Wang was in a relationship with?
Wang specifically says “the reason was innocent”. He emphasized that he was simply trying to make the new kid less lonely and protect him. He wasn't trying to date. Similarly, Siam was simply being kind. He didn't talk to In with anterior motives. Yet we know how that went.
Wang: And then one day. He told me he loved me. And it wasn't the kind of love you have for a friend. His feelings for me were deeper. In: What did you do? Wang: I admit I was stunned at first. Speechless. I couldn't think straight. I think there was fear between us. And suddenly, all I saw was him. The look on his face. His eyes. He was obviously more scared about this than I was. And that was it. The story of two lonely students plagued by fear. But is was nice to know though that we could still find love. In: You're saying as if no one loved you Wang: I know. My mom loves me. I'm everything to her. But I guess deep down... I was longing for my missing puzzle piece. In: And did you find that puzzle piece? Wang: I told you didn't I? We were two lonely kids. Consumed by fear. His fear was different from mine. His fear was from the outside. He was afraid he wouldn't fit in. You could say we wanted to walk on a different path. He was a good student and in the end he got accepted into his dream college. He made new friends and we started to drift apart. But I'm happy for him. He has finally managed to fit in. In: What about you? What was your fear? Wang: My fear.. I didn't want to lose myself just to fit in. In: Even if it meant being alone and lonely?
This is such a parallel between Wang/friend and Siam/In. Siam also was the one to confess. Siam and In were also older then and had known each other for longer. But in their youth they were also just two lonely and afraid students. In the future they were still lonely and afraid.
I'm going to assume that Wang didn't really consider his sexuality too much up until that point. Maybe he was pushing it off. Maybe he did know, but he wasn't sure how he felt about his friend. At least not consciously.
This is the rare time when Wang isn't a direct parallel to his father. Cause otherwise he would be the one confessing. Nevertheless, I think we can interpret this bit of the monologue as the director saying "this is how the Siam/In" confession scene went. So for a brief moment In only saw Siam and his love for Siam. Except In didn't realize just how afraid Siam was. Well he did, but he focused on his own fear.
The difference is that Wang and his friend let go and drifted apart. Wang knew he couldn't be with the other guy bc it would mean he'd have to hide himself. The guy probably wanted a secret relationship and Wang couldn't do that. Wang, like his father, wanted to be more open. He wanted to date for real. Maybe they tried to date for a bit, but then drifted apart bc of their fears. In ran away. He didn't attempt anything. He ran away, and Siam didn't move on.
This is where Siam goes back to being like Wang. Wang knew that his friend wouldn't be able to be open, so he let go. He let his friend try to fit in (even if he disagreed). Siam didn't. Or rather, he didn't live to try. Of course this is because that's also a difference between the stories. The boy was never pushed to fit in, neither was Wang. Wang is younger and a different generation. He didn't hide as much. They were able to comfortably go their own ways. In chose to hide and then forced Siam to hide as well. And that's why their stories are different (and the addition of Mol).
