Apr 15, 2025
..."doing nothing often leads to the very best of something"...
~A.A. Milne
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..."doing nothing often leads to the very best of something"...
~A.A. Milne
No one can tell me,
Nobody knows,
Where the wind comes from,
Where the wind goes.
It’s flying from somewhere
As fast as it can,
I couldn’t keep up with it,
Not if I ran.
~A.A.Milne
source
Why am I only now discovering that A.A. Milne (of Winnie the Pooh) also wrote for adults and he is hilarious
(I know why, it's because I bought this book in a charity shop and put off reading it for months, but now I'm putting off a different book by reading this one)
These snippets are from Oranges and Lemons as published in The Sunny Side which is a collection of his short stories. The plot (as far as I have got) is that a group of 6 posh English friends go stay in a villa in France for a month.
"Pipe, tobacco, matches, keys, money?" "Everything," I said. [...] "I do know I shall be horribly late. Good-bye." I fled down the stairs into the street, waved to Myra at the window ... and then came cautiously up again for my pipe. Life is very difficult on the mornings when you are in a hurry.
--
"Have a cigar - if you've brought any with you."
--
Entered Thomas lazily. "Hallo," he said in his slow voice. "What's it all about?" "It's a raid on the Begum's palace," explained Archie rapidly. "Dahlia decoys the Chief Mucilage; you, Thomas, drive the submarine; Myra has charge of the clockwork mouse, and we others hang about and sing. To say more at this stage would be to bring about a European conflict."
--
"It must be rather difficult climbing up [to the top berth] at night," thought Dahlia. "Not if you get a good take-off, Dahlia," said Simpson earnestly. "Simpson got a good one off my face," explained Thomas. "My dear old chap, I was frightfully sorry. I did come down at once and tell you how sorry I was, didn't I?" "You stepped back on to it," said Thomas shortly, and he turned his attention to his coffee.
--
"In London," I went on, "it is raining. Looking out of my window I see a lamp-post (not in flower) beneath a low, grey sky. Here we see oranges against a blue sky a million miles deep. What a blend! Myra, let's go to a fancy-dress ball when we get back. You go as an orange and I'll go as a very blue, blue sky, and you shall lean against me." "And we'll dance the tangerine," said Myra.
--
To be five guests of the guest of a man you have never met is delicate work. [...] "We must get ouselves into proper order," he said. "Simpson, the villa has been lent to you; you must go first. Dahlia and I come next. When you arrive you will introduce us as your friends, Mr and Mrs Mannering. Then turning to Myra you say, 'Mr Mannering's sister; and this,' you add, 'is her husband.' Then - er - Thomas -" "It will be difficult to account for Thomas," I said. "Thomas comes at the end. He hangs back a little at first; and then if he sees that there is going to be any awkwardness about him, he can pretend he's come on the wrong night, and apologise and go home again."
--
There were four ladies; we shook hands with all of them. It took us a long time, and I doubt if we got it all in even so, for twice I found myself shaking hands with Simpson.
--
When Myra married me she promised to love, honour and write all my thank-you-very-much letters for me, for we agreed before the ceremony that the word "obey" should mean nothing more than that.
--
"But, my dear Myra, it's the first thing the fellows at the club ask you when you've been to the Riviera - if you've had any luck [gambling]." "Well, you've had a lot of luck," said Archie. "Several times when you've been standing on the heights and calling attention to the beautiful view below, I've said to myself, 'One push, and he's a deader,' but something, some mysterious agency within, has kept me back."
A.A. Milne illustrations in "Who Was A.A. Milne?" really look based on Domhnall
'*•.¸♡ ♡¸.•*'
𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐧𝐝. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐬𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐝, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐈 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬."
- AA Milne [via oldfarmhouse]
Favorite Public Domain Books
Round 2
Winnie the Pooh (A.A. Milne) VS The Count of Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)
Winnie the Pooh
The Count of Monte Cristo
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NO ANTIPROPAGANDA PLEASE
Propaganda under the cut
"If there's a buzzing-noise, somebody's making a buzzing-noise, and the only reason for making a buzzing-noise that I know of is because you're a bee." Then he thought another long time, and said: "And the only reason for being a bee that I know of is making honey." And then he got up, and said: "And the only reason for making honey is so I can eat it." So he began to climb the tree.
Happy 100th, Pooh Bear!
Winnie-the-Pooh made his first named appearance in the London Evening News on December 24, 1925. AA Milne's story, "The Wrong Sort of Bees," had been commissioned specifically for Christmas Eve. It was illustrated by JH Dowd. When Milne published the book simply called Winnie-the-Pooh in 1926, the Evening News story served as the first chapter, with new illustrations (like the one above) by EH Shepard.