I don’t think I’ve ever written Domino like this before.
It’s a chilling moment for her. What started as crack is, well, the first time in her life that it’s been thrust in her face that she has something to lose.]
We’ve reached a huge turning point on this blog and I hope nobody minds when I tag the relevant people.
Remember this meme? Just this morning? (Thanks, @mercenaryrocket)
She’s found herself at a version of a precipice I didn’t even think of when writing that third answer.
It’s been thrust in her face that she cares. She has always denied it- to herself, to the world. Refused to process it. Filed herself as a person who doesn’t care (cemented further by her rift with @professor-pinewood, a time she dipped her toes into having a secret identity, maybe a secret identity with friends, but that came crashing down).
She liked Cyan ( @ex-rockxtgrunt) well enough. They had some good times. Swapped clothes and brushes, talked, cared.
In tags, I jokingly called him her “best friend” but she wouldn’t have thought of him like that until this.
Her relationship with Silver... she’s compared him to a brother in her mind, but it didn’t become real until this threat.
And that’s the thing. Because she has nothing to lose, she’s never had anything to lose but her life, she’s never been afraid.
There’s never been a chance she hasn’t taken- which is why this ask by @tenderpoison seemed impossible to answer:
Because she’s grabbed at life with both hands and breathed it with all her lungs, jumping at chances and opportunities every single time one presented itself.
She’s always been an opportunist, but she’s also always relied on herself. Always herself. Nobody else. No Pokemon- nobody to disappoint her, nobody to blame for anything, anything but herself. Total agency over everything that happens to her.
And that had the side effect of not having anybody or anything to lose.
Now, though... it’s like her whole world is inverted.
She’s been keeping in touch with Silver ( @ag-gravated ) in secret from Giovanni ( @geobadge). Odds are, Giovanni also has no idea she ever even met Cyan. Out on base, she’s cold and unapproachable (with exceptions, but they’re not all canon).
Giovanni doesn’t know she considers his son something of a brother.
Giovanni has no clue he’s threatening the livelihood of the only other person she cares about protecting.
And Domino. Is. Terrified.
She doesn’t know this feeling, not really. She’s been afraid before, but she’s never had anything to lose.
She’s trained herself to jump toward fear, savor the adrenaline, do what other people lack the courage (or recklessness) to. Gotten addicted to the rush of sensations when she’s on her own and only has seconds to react- and herself to rely on.
She barely even knows fear.
Now she... can’t.
And that’s new.
And she has no idea how to cope with any of that.
