#aceslide

[just-graysexual]

(PART 1)Hi! For a while now I’ve been very confused about my sexuality and whether I’m asexual or not. I know I’ve felt a sexual attraction to people before but it’s very rare and even when it does happen, I don’t necessarily feel the need to act upon it. Usually when I’m attracted to someone it’s romantically and rarely sexually. The idea of sex makes me quite anxious and uncomfortable but I still do have a desire for it occasionally?? Idk I’ve always felt like a complete freak over it and like

(PART 2) there’s something wrong with me. I’m in general a very anxious person and don’t know if me being very anxious towards sex is my sexuality or personality. I’ve only recently looked into all the spectrums of asexualilty and I feel like I align almost perfectly with grey sexuality but I’m scared to label myself as that in fear I’ll offend someone. I’m sorry, I’m just very confused and lost atm and needed to tell someone all of this 

Hi anon!Firstly, there is nothing wrong with you and identifying as graysexual is not at all offensive! Its totally understandable to be lost and confused, though, and I hope I can help you feel better about your identity.To me you sound like you are graysexual, and you are absolutely welcome to identify as that! When it comes to identifying as graysexual it doesn’t matter if its sometimes or partly your anxiety making you worried/uncomfortable with sex, because you dont have to always dislike sex to be asexual/ace-spec! It does sound to me like you may be aceslide as well, though, which is when it varies whether you’re sex-repulsed, sex-positive or sex-neutral. I hope this helps, and remember you are totally valid, be it as questioning, gray-ace, otherwice ace-spec, or allosexual - whatever you figure out fits you and that you are most comfortable identifying as is valid!Take care and remember its ok to take some time to figure out your identity!- Mod Riah

[ask-pride-color-schemes]

Is there a term for fluctuating between being allosexual and asexual spectrum? Sometimes I would be totally okay with sex, but other days I feel repulsed by genetalia (I believe the term is agensexual?) but okay with anything above the waist. Idk what to call that

Aceslide: Someone whose level of sex repulsion fluctuates (sometimes repulsed, sometimes not, sometimes being okay with some sexual acts but not others). Since it’s about sex acts and not attraction, it isn’t an orientation; you can be aceslide and asexual, aceslide and demisexual, and so on. (I’m not sure if people outside the asexual spectrum can use it, but it’s certainly an experience allo people can have.) Original post here.

Aceflux: Someone whose (capacity of) sexual attraction fluctuates between existing and not existing, it’s also possible to feel attraction in different a-spec ways (akin to akoi/lith, demi, gray, etc.) when an aceflux person is not feeling attraction at allo levels or no attraction at all.

[ask-pride-color-schemes]

Fluctuating repusled anon again, would I be able to make another term with -sliding if I'm not sure I'm really ace?

I guess so? I think it’s completely appropriate, I’d contact @peppermintpaz (the coiner) to see what she thinks and to make sure if there aren’t alternative terms she coined already though.

~ Tath