10 seizure-like episodes total as of Nov 11th 2025 11pm
19 seizure-like episodes total as Nov 12th 2025 9:30am
Until we know what these are, I'm calling them stress seizures or tachy-seizures bc they always kick up my tachycardia. I slept great but around 8am Nov 12th they tried a breathing treatment.....
(had many before growing up with the physical therapy, respiratory therapy, and occupational therapy after having my first ever sickle cell pain crisis at the age of 10 months)
so technically not new medication in either respect, this was a continuation of unfinished tests from November 11th. Two puffs of albuterol. ONLY TWOOO.
It triggered something..... that's why I'm at 19 episodes
Medically? They can't be called seizures bc I'm conscious everytime. Meaning like, I'm wildly aware + awake every time this happens. It hurts and it's really fcking scary 👌🏾 Aside from losing consciousness, they're so seizure-like if you weren't knowledgeable you'd assume it's an actual seizure 🙃
Consulting Cardio, Hematology, and now Neurology is on the docket for getting some important tests done.
I will post more about potential updates later, currently our priority is getting my tachycardia stable enough to run tests that weren't completed yesterday before all this started happening. And then add new tests.....
Because this shit is still like, actively problematic. Fun.
Steve finally appeared in the basement, frowning at the sight. “Finn? What’s going on?”
The drugs had given Fao a split second of relief before the pounding of his heart was back. He whimpered, feeling again on the verge passing out, darkness tinging his vision.
"I can't do this. He needs cardioverting. You're gonna have to do it."
“Hang on, slow down. Talk me through what’s going on.” He said, moving to check the monitoring.
"Just look at it." Finn grumbled. "I've sedated a bit, given some pain relief, but you need to do it."
“Have you given adenosine?” Steve asked, keen to coach Finn through it rather than just completely take over.
"I've only done dc cardioversion before. There's so many risks with adenosine…" He looked to Steve, so overwhelmed.
“Okay, but it’s risk management, yeah?”
"It's Fao, Steve. I can't do this."
“Of course you can.” Steve told him.
"Steve, I can't."
“Yes you can. Come on, we’ll do it together.”
"Please."
“Take a moment, go and sort the drugs out.”
He gave a heavy breath. "Okay. Are…are we doing adenosine?"
“Yeah, we’re going to need to.”
"I can sort it."
“Thank you, Finn.”
"Is he gonna be okay?"
“Of course he is.” Steve busied himself doing his own checks whilst Finn sorted the meds. Fao was still struggling, in and out a little not just because of the sedation. It was hard to concentrate on anything, as much as he tried to listen to what they were saying. He couldn’t remember Steve arriving. Had he been there the whole time?
"I've got the adenosine."
“Perfect. Do you know what you’re doing with it?”
"Giving it to you." He tried.
“Or you could just give it.”
"Steve."
“Come on, give it. You know what you’re doing, we don’t have time to waste.”
He did as he was told, his hands shaking and his own chest tight. Resentment only grew as Steve continued to push him, unable to separate work from family.
“Good. Now we just have to watch and wait, keep an eye on that monitoring.”
The sedation Finn gave had been enough to keep Fao hazy, but not completely out of it. As the drugs went in he whined, feeling the effect of it. It was awful, the overwhelming sense that he was going to die. It felt like he was dying too, as it suddenly became more difficult to breathe.
"You're okay, you're okay." Finn moved to hold Fao's hand, stroking through his hair. "It won't take long."
He gripped Finn’s hand, panic in his eyes. It felt wrong.
"It's gonna make you feel shit for a bit. You're okay."
He wasn’t okay, he was the opposite of okay, and nobody was helping. He struggled against the blackness at the edge of his vision, terrified if he gave into it he wasn’t going to wake up again.
Finn’s eyes didn't move from the monitors, watching the rhythms carefully. There was a pause, snd Finn’s own heart almost stopped. Sure enough though, it kicked back in, and straight back into the tachycardia.
Steve swore from the end of the bed. "Finn, we need another dose."
Once the feeling like he was going to die had passed, there was a moment where things eased for Fao and he felt like he could breathe. But nearly as soon as it had happened, it was gone, and he groaned, gripping Finn’s hand desperately.
"We need to go elsewhere." Finn's voice wavered. "They can do more."
Steve shook his head. “We don’t have time, Finn, and we’ve done too much already.”
"Then you do something! It's not working!"
“Finn, breathe.”
"I'm trying but nothing is working and you're not helping!"
“We just have to follow the protocol, another dose and see how that goes.” Steve told him gently. “This is all they’d do in ED.”
I see paramedics getting all excited about pushing the adenosine but like when you’re actually the one on the receiving end it fucking sucks because it feels like you’re gonna die. I only had it once but it was enough to be like “FUCK THIS, JUST SHOCK ME!”
