#adhd loba

[the-mechanica]

(Back on my AuDHD Loba shit)

Ways Loba Masks

- so much posturing as poised, sultry, and collected

- her entire ensemble is exacting and Means Something (her eyeshadow stands for Marcos’ blood, her braids resemble her hair at 9 even 30 yrs later, etc)

- some of her quips are almost corny and/or are scripted from other sources (“Mama’s got a brand new bag” James Brown, “Business -is- my pleasure” “A lady never kills and tells”)

- idk about anyone else, but there was a time in my life I wore A Lot of elaborate eye makeup as a means to keep myself from crying (out of anger and upset) and she does the same

Ways Loba Doesn’t Mask

- she speaks in singsong or deadpan

- she looks like she’s lying because she doesn’t make consistent eye contact/doesn’t look at who she is speaking to

- impulsive to a fault with heightened emotions

- she’ll stall when called out and get defensive

- aggressive when pressed

[the-mechanica]

When I headcanon Loba as having OCD (and AuDHD), it's not in the way most assume OCD behaves. It's not Obsessive Compulsion as much as it can be -Compulsive Obsession-.

[the-mechanica]

I don’t know who might need to hear this but this scene:

Legit helped explain my Pathological Demand Avoidance (Persistent Drive for Autonomy, PDA) to my therapist.

I am pretty sure that if Loba is AuDHD, then she has PDA. She will straight up not do something if you ask her to the wrong way. Perfectly illustrated by her decision not to kill Rev after he specifically asked her WHEN SHE WAS ALREADY GOING TO. The fact that she basically rejected her own original plan when she no longer felt in control of it is perfectly PDA. Why this scene works so well to illustrate PDA is that Revenant, of all people, legitimately works with Loba's PDA to get her to finally agree to kill him. Not by shaming her like Kairi was doing (enough to get her to meltdown and cry), but by asking Loba what she wants. By doing so, Rev sets everything up so that Loba can feel in control again. Aside from everything that happens after that

[the-mechanica]

[the-mechanica]

Loba legit had a meltdown, broke up with Valk and re-regulated with Rev

[the-mechanica]

Oh look it's another AuDHD Loba post. I want to talk about the concept of having a 'safe person'.

For mostly autistic and variably ND people, they have what's called a 'safe person'. For some lower needs nd folks, what this person provides is a sense of safety to unmask. Autism advocates on other socials have defined this as a person who has "seen all sides of them and has not judged them for it". The 'safe person' gives the autistic person space to feel the true extent of their feelings, good and bad, outside of external pressure from neurotypical expectations. Regardless of the relationship otherwise, it's the context of that alone that defines what a 'safe person' does for someone autistic. Revenant is Loba's 'safe person'. I know it sounds counterintuitive that Rev be "safe" in any sense of the word, but he is the only person she has found herself around that has never questioned her emotional reactions. Maybe he's made them worse, but he has never told her to cut it out like others have (cough Kairi cough). Revenant has never pressured Loba to mask, and in fact, encourages her not to. I posit that this is the reason she was so reluctant to kill him. Yes, she wanted him to suffer, but she said something really key during Life for a Life: "Better than letting you go". Not 'better than letting you die'. More than anything, Loba wanted to hold onto the freedom to unmask around Revenant and take out her frustrations and trauma on him. When presented with the option of not having that anymore, she had a meltdown. Note: Anita has tried to be Loba's safe person, and prolly very often times is... but not to the extent that Revenant has proven to be. Anita has also had her own issues to work through separate from Loba, including being around her brother again (being that I also think she's on the spectrum sincerely). I believe that one day she can in fact be Loba's safe person again in full, but someday.

[the-mechanica]

Loba's updated bio reads like someone desperately trying to convince you they are NT after you witnessed them having a giant autistic meltdown. Lore hates that they made her ND in the face of the fact that Wattson is such weaksauce autistic rep, I swear. Oh? She's a genius? She's messy? She had a meltdown once in her season after her dad died??? You don't say. /s Did she obsessively fixate on revenge for over 20 years and dysregulate every time you suggested stopping? Like, why talk about Loba wanting to save her soul? It makes her sound so Catholic. Which I headcanon she is anyway, bc she acts like it Loba being neurodivergent explains literally so much about her, but blaming her for "shattering" her relationships over her "thirst for revenge" is just another way of saying "this woman's expression of her neurodiversity was so problematic to her friends, she's decided to mask her way into acceptance again".

Glad to see we're blaming Loba again. /s

[the-mechanica]

Ok, so this is based on lived experience of AuDHD me and my Autistic partner @nessie-gun. When it came to trying to summarize how Loba's AuDHD reads in game, I could only come up with: It's the assumed shadiness of Wattson/Crypto with the supposed selfishness of Octane. We know them better enough to know they don't mean to behave that way, but are canon neurodivergent enough for it to give their behavior context.

I've joked that AuDHD is like realizing that someone has a reason for being Like That, but it's true. There's an inconsistency to how autism and adhd interact within a person that effects how it expresses. In Loba's case, add trauma and it exacerbates both, even in the far future of the Outlands. When folks disparage her, it tends to be about a part of her character that reads as AuDHD. While I don't care about most headcanons, I do take that to heart as a queer ND trauma survivor. I don't care if it's ever canon that she's AuDHD, I just think she is.