#alex example

[scriptshrink]

Probably a stupid question: but how do I write a character who became evil due to being betrayed and similar reason WITHOUT making her mentally ill or making her action excusable with mental illness? I'm afraid that readers won't get it, even if I write a chapter saying just that she is not mentally ill. I want to show people that being evil doesn't come with mental illness and these are two different things.

I actually propose that you go about this in a different way.

If you only say “Oh, mental illness doesn’t make you evil”, sure, that’s a good thing. But you miss an opportunity to provide something to replace that trope.

If you really want to emphasize that mental illness doesn’t make you evil, write mentally ill heroes.

It doesn’t just provide for better representation, I’ve found that it makes for stronger stories.

Let’s look at two versions of the same scene, where the protagonist has finally cornered the villain.

Villainous Vance stares Neurotypical Nancy down. “I can’t be held responsible for my actions! The violent urges are too strong for me to resist.”

Nancy shakes her head. “Many people with mental illnesses also have those intrusive thoughts, but they don’t act on them! You’re not mentally ill! You’re just an asshole!”

Villainous Vance stares Alex Example down. “Alex, no matter how you pretend to be good, you’ve got a dark side, just like me. You want to kill. You think about it all the time. Don’t run from it. Embrace it. Join me.”

“Do I think about it? Yeah.” Alex’s lips twitch into a smile. “But guess what, asshole? Thinking about something doesn’t mean I want to do it. I’m stronger than my intrusive thoughts. I’ll never join you!“

I dunno about y’all, but I’d much rather read the second story than the first.

Disclaimer 

[scriptshrink]

what level of specificity would you recommend in naming diagnoses in novels? would you say you run the risk of dating your story if you give your character a label that soon goes out of use (like ddnos in the dsm 4 becoming osdd in the dsm 5)? especially in stories that are meant to be in the far future or an alternate universe. is it better to avoid clinical wording to lessen the chance of it becoming obsolete in a few years? or does the value of explicit representation outweigh that?

This is a interesting question! There’s a couple of ways to go about this:

1. Don’t name any kind of diagnosis at all; let readers draw that conclusion.

This is my least favorite, because I personally think naming the disorder is important for representation. If you choose this one, I recommend really going out of your way to clearly portray the symptoms.

2. Use the real name, even if it’s anachronous / doesn’t fit your setting.

“The wizard has panic disorder and agoraphobia, so they never leave their tower.”

3. Use the real name, but only on a meta / narrator level.

“In another world, her affliction would be called depression, but they had no name for it here.”

4. Modify existing names to try to convey the same meaning while sounding right for your setting.

The healer shakes their head gravely. “He has a disorder of the personality that makes him dependent on others. It is not something a potion can cure.” 

(Dependent personality disorder)

5. Use fancier-sounding existing names.

“I’m so worried about her, Father. Do you think it could be dysthymia?”

(Persistent Depressive Disorder)

6. Use historical names if your story is in the past. Be careful with this one though - some of the historical terms can be problematic.

Alex Example takes a deep breath before confessing to Lord Winston, “I think I have manic depression, just as my mother did.” 

(Bipolar or related disorders)

7. Make up a name and describe its symptoms enough that readers understand what you’re saying.

The seer peers at Alex Example before saying, “The Curse of the Soldier is upon you.”

Alex Example frowns. “But how can I have it? I’ve never been on a battlefield.”

The seer smiles sadly. “War is not the only horror that can bring the curse. The tragedies you’ve been through are haunting you.”

(PTSD)

8. Make up names and link them to the current diagnosis if your story is in the future.

“I’ve got severe neural psychosis.”

“What’s that again? I don’t know psychobabble.”

“Used to be called schizophrenia.”

Hope that helps! 

Followers, can you think of other ways to include a diagnosis in your non-modern stories?

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[scriptshrink]

I have a question after seeing you post on Psychomotor Retardation. When a character with Pyschomotor Retardation speaks, how is their grammar? Say if they forgot the word "malfunction", would say say "doesn't work" or "not work/ not working" or some other variation, or would they just stay quiet until they think of "malfunction"?

In reference to this post here!

That depends on the character. Sometimes using smaller, simpler words is easier for one character; for other characters, it wouldn’t affect their grammar, just their rate of speech.

So let’s say that Alex has psychomotor retardation. Here’s two ways you could write this:

There is a pause as Alex seems to wrack his brains for the right word. He eventually gives up, stating simply, “It’s not working.”

Vs.

After a long pause, Alex speaks, her words sluggish and slow, “I think it’s malfunctioning.”

It’s up to you as the writer to decide how it manifests.