“Mr. Scamander!”

#dc#dc comics#batman#bruce wayne#tim drake#batfam#dick grayson#batfamily#dc fanart


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“Mr. Scamander!”
sirius mf black
written for day 9 of october for @wolfstarmicrofic with the prompt "apparate"
400 words! (wow thats so nice)
“Pads, come on! We’re gonna be late for Bartys party!” Remus shouts down the hall. He’s been waiting on Sirius for the past 30 minutes, and the party starts in 5 minutes. He gets that Sirius has a certain image that he likes to uphold, but this is a bit excessive. He’s been in their bathroom for the last 3 hours doing merlin knows what.
“Give me one more minute,” Sirius replies, shouting through the door.
Remus rolls his eyes. “You said that 10 minutes ago, let's go. Or I’ll apparate without you.”
He hears the door open and out comes a very flustered, hot, sexy Sirius. “You would never.” He smirks.
Usually Remus would reply with a smart-ass reply, but he has no words. Not with Sirius standing there in their living room looking like that. He’s in tight black leather pants that hug every curve of his arse and hips. His "shirt" is one of those mesh fishnet ones that usually have something under them, but Sirius sports it plainly, his pink nipples peeking out against the fabric.
His hair is styled effortlessly, looking like he just got out of bed, or in other words, really fuckable. His smoky eye is flawless, his eyeliner winged perfection. He has gold highlighter scattered across his cheekbones, accentuating the sharp angles of the bones.
Remus tries and fails to pick his jaw up off the ground. But how could anyone do that? Not possible for Remus, not with his beautiful alluring fiancé just begging for someone to disrobe him and smudge his perfectly done makeup.
Not caring about the party any more, Remus looks Sirius dead in his midnight black eyes and says, “bedroom now.”
Sirius tilts his head in fake confusion. “But the party…” Remus knows that Sirius never really cared about the party anyways, and with Sirius looking like that, Remus doesn't care anymore either.
“Bedroom, or we can do it here, your choice,” Remus offers. They’ve fucked on most surfaces of their house, including the living room multiple times.
Sirius turns around, and walks back to the bedroom in a way that shows Remus off every curve and bend of his ass. Remus has to show self control to stop drooling. He quickly follows after Sirius, stumbling on his steps for a minute before chasing after Sirius.
***
They never did make it to the party that night.
read a wattpad fic earlier and remembered why i deleted that shit in the first place as im going to find some bleach for my eyes. wattpad walked so ao3 could run. amen.
-a.s.
Apparate
They entered the lift nervously, their pinkies joined and chose the floor for the Department of Magical Transportation.
“Nervous, Moony?” Sirius asked, even though he could feel Remus sweating next to him.
“What if I make a fool of myself in front of the examiner?” Remus asked.
“You won’t…Pete managed it. You should be able to…you were the first one to do it,” Sirius said, quietly as more witches and wizards got on and off the lift.
They got off at their floor and went into the office they were looking for. A bored looking wizard handed them a clipboard and leaflet that read, “So You Want to Apparate.”
Sirius looked over the paperwork and tapped it with his wand. Swirling script letters appeared in all of the small boxes. “Want me to do yours, Moonshine?” Sirius asked.
“No, I’m alright,” Remus said, tapping his clipboard with his own wand.
They brought the clipboards back to the bored looking wizard, were given numbers and told to wait.
“I bet it’s even more paperwork if you’re registering as an animagus,” Sirius whispered to Remus as they waited.
“Probably. It’s considered more dangerous magic,” Remus said, reasonably.
They were growing antsy and Sirius was about to suggest a quickie in the loo to calm their nerves, but then, “Black, Sirius,” was called.
“Wish me luck,” he said, squeezing Remus’s hand.
Without Sirius to distract him, Remus felt quite jittery. He kept wiping his sweaty hands on his trousers until her heard, “Lupin, Remus.”
He drew himself up to his full height, gripped his wand and walked toward the examiner.
Word Count: 267
@wolfstarmicrofic
I came up with this little head cannon at like 3 am and couldn't stop laughing at it so here it goes
The headmaster had always been able to apparate within Hogwarts and this honor is given by the castle itself, so Dumbledore can apparate within Hogwarts. You might think that Snape would be able to also but you're wrong. The castle never let Snape apparate and this frustrated him so much. He let his anger out upon the whole staff, and this is how Minerva McGonagall realized that she was the true headmistress. SHE WAS THE ONE WHO COULD APPARATE WITHIN HOGWARTS. The castle recognized her as the leader of the school and not Snape.
This is hilarious to me because Snape being extremely frustrated will always be funny
And this, children, is what can go wrong with teleportation: you could wind up with Ronald Weasley as your butt or, even worse, you could become a human puppet pal centi Snapepede.
ron seeing harry in honeydukes and just immediately assuming harry learned to apparate is peak friendship really like there was no other explanation to ron just harrys learned a very difficult spell that apparently some adult wizards don't know and didn't tell them