#aspec rants

[neptune-scythe]

on #myshit again

but the entire concept of soulmates just pisses me off so bad

like the entire idea is that no one person is complete or whole or able to be happy because they NEED the other half of their soul ... aka, another person in order to have that

which is fucking insane

and crazy polyphobic but that's another rant

like why are we as a society instilling that belief into people?? that no one person's life has any value or purpose outside of another person??

like yeah it's nice to feel needed or valued by another person, but for that to be your entire life purpose is so disrespectful

every single person has value and deserves a full life purely because they are here

not because of what they can provide or who they can serve or what task their life can be boiled down to

living is enough

and the idea that it isn't unless you're "in love" or have found one singular person to latch onto is harming us as individuals and as a collective and frankly I think it should stop

[neptune-scythe]

I'm never a "I wish I was normal" type of person because tbh "normal" is boring and a lie anyway so why would I want that?

but the one exception is being aplatonic

people just don't seem to be able to grasp the concept of not wanting friends or to be social without it being because I'm just depressed and need to get out more

which even if it was because I was depressed that is not anyone's business to try and fix me without even asking if hanging out with them is even a remotely feasible solution

but I digress

people understand the concept of sexual and romantic attraction, that it doesn't always go both ways, and some people understand that attraction doesn't always exist at all, but people don't seem to get that with platonic attraction as well

like yeah I don't mind talking to people sometimes, I might even enjoy it on occasion, but that doesn't mean I want to be friends with that person, or hang out outside of work or wherever we met, and most people just don't understand that

and they can't understand that some people are simply not social beings, not because we're broken and need to be fixed, that's just who we are and there's nothing wrong with it

and it could very well just be that I've never been in a situation where someone asked me out or wanted to be in sexual or romantic relationship with me, but being aroace has never felt so alienating as being aplatonic does (alienating in the sense that no one really understands, not in the being separate from other people way)

there always seems to be a pressure to have platonic relationships, always confusion and concern when someone doesn't want that, always has to be a whole conversation and justification as to why I don't want to hang out with someone ... but even a conversation doesn't lead to understanding, just hurt feelings on the other person's part

honestly it was just easier when I had convinced myself I wanted friends, I just went along with it, I was uncomfortable but I ignored that until it was so far suppressed I didn't even notice it (until it got too much), I never had to justify my behaviors, never had to explain why I don't meet people's expectations that were put on me without even meeting me yet

so in this, and only this ... sometimes I would just like to know what it's like to be "normal"

because I know better than to expect society or other people to ever learn or improve their ways to accommodate me